//------------------------------//
// Back in Ponyville 
// Story: Of Vodka and Cider 
// by UglyTurnip 
//------------------------------//

A few days later. . . 

Nikolai couldn't help but notice the overwhelming smell of various perfumes when he walked into Rarity's boutique and gagged violently when he took his first whiff.

"Welcome, darling!" Came Rarity's voice as she  the room, ignoring Nikolai's reaction to the smells. "I'm so happy you finally took me up on that offer."

The drunk's clothes were still stained with the blood of countless ponies killed in Stalliongrad. "Yeah," he said cooly, sitting down in a chair. "Twilight insists that I wear something more formal to see the princesses in," he explained, grumbling at the word formal.


"Well, I must say that it is delightful to design a new outfit for such an interesting creature," Rarity said as she levitated a pair of glasses onto her face. "I can say that I'm the only fashion designer in Equestria, nay, the world, who has ever worked with your kind!" She smiled in amusement at this thought. "Do you have anything particular in mind?"

"No, creativity is not my strength, that is killing," he tried to joke, but was met with silence.

Rarity found her measure and motioned for Nikolai to stand up. Once he did, she went to work, measuring his waist and lengths.

"So, Twilight never told me why you're going to see the princesses again."

"You mean you haven't heard still?" Nikolai questioned.

"Heard about what?" 

"I was at Stalliongrad during the incident."

Rarity gasped. "You were there!?"

Nikolai nodded, dead serious. "Yeah, I was. It wasn't pretty sight. Whatever was affecting them came from my world. That's what worries me."

"How bad was it?"

"It was a lost cause from the start. Berry and me-"

"Berry and I," Rarity scolded. Grammar was one of her many pet peeves.

"Fine," Nikolai acknowledged as he rolled his eyes. "Berry and I barely got out alive."

"That's horrible!" Rarity exclaimed dramatically. "Although, at least now the city has an excuse for a much needed makeover."

"Focus, Rarity."

"Oh yes, how insensitive of me. I'm sure many lives were lost, right?"

"Pretty much the whole city. We found a pair of twins and a courier. One of the twins died getting out, but I can't say I miss her. She was a bitch."

Rarity glared at Nikolai. "I'm sorry Nikolai, but a lady does not tolerate improper language."

Nikolai gave a small sly smile as he simply uttered two words. "Bar Night."

Rarity blushed like a ripe tomato. "Point taken, I've been the talk of the town ever since that happened. It's hurt the business."

"And your reputation."

Tears formed in Rarity's eyes as she realized how foolish she has acted that night and began to bawl on the floor in her usual dramatic way. Before she got really into it, though, she heard the front door open as the Cutie Mark Crusaders made their way in.

"Uh, Rarity, are you OK?" Sweetie Belle asked her sister, who lying on the ground with her mane ruined and mascara running down her face.

"Oh, of course, Sweetie Belle," Rarity grinned and let out a forced chuckle. "Everything is perfectly fine."

"Oh, hey! You have the hairless ape!" Scootaloo exclaimed, pointing to Nikolai.

"Please do not call me that, young pony," he said politely, as Nikolai had a weak spot for children.

"Oh, well what can we call 'ya?" Apple Bloom asked.  "We have a list of names fir your species."

"Now, now, fillies," Rarity spoke, her tone sweet and polite but her face scowling. "Nikolai's species has a name already. He's a human."

"Oh, you mean like those creatures Twilight told us about? The ones from the mirror world?"

"Yeah, but I'm not from the mirror world. My humans are different."

"They lack a decent sense of fashion," Rarity commented.

Sweetie Belle gave a long look at Nikolai and his clothes. "Yeah, I gotta agree with you, sis."

"Sis?" Nikolai questioned, now looking directly at Sweetie Belle for the first time. "Oh, I see the resemblance. Has anyone told you that you look like a mini-marshmallow?"

"Uhh, no?"

"Well, you look like one."

"Is that good, or bad?"

"And yellow one," Nikolai shifted his attention to Apple Bloom. "You sound like Applejack."

Apple Bloom smiled. "That's 'cuz a'hm her sister. Mah name's Apple Bloom."

"So, is there something you need, Sweetie?" Rarity said, paying attention to the measurements.

"Oh, we wanted to ask if we could have a slumber party at your house," Sweetie Belle stated eagerly. 

Rarity frowned. "The last time you three had a slumber party here, you kept me up all night with your loud video games."

"That was because Button was over, and you know how much he loves games," Sweetie Belle smiled as she thought of her crush. "But he's not coming over this time."

"Alright," Rarity agreed and gave the three a smile. "Just keep it down after ten, OK?"

"Deal!" Sweetie nodded, opening the door. "We'll be back before sunset. Bye Rarity! Bye Nikolai!" And before either of the two parties could respond with their own farewells, the three fillies skipped out and slammed the door behind them.

"She's a piece of work sometimes," Rarity said after an uncomfortable silence. "Did you have any siblings, Nikolai?"

"No, Nikolai's family was too poor to have second child. We were but simple farmers. It was probably for the best; I wouldn't be able to handle a sister like yours."

"I wouldn't go that far," Rarity gave Nikolai a sweet smile. "True, we don't see eye-to-eye often, but Sweetie is always trying to do things to help me, and I'm grateful for having such a loving sister," she levitated her tools away and gently set them down on a nearby table. "OK, Nikolai, the measurements are done. I'll begin work on the outfit right away."

The drunk gave a half-hearted "Thank you, Rarity," and quietly left.

. . .

"Where have you been, Nikolai!?" Had been Twilight's first words upon seeing the Russian in town again. "Rarity and Fluttershy have been looking all over for you!"

Twilight could see that he was not his usual rude, carefree self. "Stalliongrad," was all he said in reply. "I was lucky to get out alive."

Twilight gasped. "You were there? Cadence didn't mention you."

"Who?" Nikolai questioned. "Never mind that. I left with Cherry Pop and Berry Punch to help with a shipment of vodka. Let's just say we never got the shipment."

"Cadence told me the city was overrun."

"Zombies," Nikolai added. "And what scares me is that they were the same kind from my world."

The gears in Twilight's brain began to turn. "Princess Celestia will want to speak with you ASAP. I'll have Spike write a letter immediately."

"If she wants to help, then I will tell her what I know," Nikolai acknowledged.

"Good," Twilight nodded and turned to run off. "Oh, and Nikolai?"

"Yeah?" 

"Try not to act stupid this time, OK?"

"I won't. This is serious."

"Thank you," and with that, Twilight went about her day.

. . .

"Nikolai, are 'ya there?" Applejack's voice caused Nikolai to snap out of his thoughts.

"Oh, hi Applejack," Nikolai greeted warmly. "What brings you into town?"

The earth pony nodded back to a cart-full of apples. "Goin' down to the farmer's market," her face frowned. "Was everythin' OK? Ya' look like something's botherin' ya."

"Ah, no," Nikolai lied. "I was just. . . thirsty. Da."

Applejack gave a grin. "That's jus' like you, Nikolai. Tell ya' what, after I'm done with my chores I'll treat ya' to a cup of cider, deal?"

Nikolai would never turn down free alcohol. "Of course. If you need me, I'll be at Berry Punch's house."

"Of course. Don't get too drunk while you're there!" Applejack joked as she continued pulling the cart down the street.

. . .

"Hey Berry, are you home?" Nikolai called out after opening the door. Silence was the only reply in the dimly-lit house.

Nikolai fumbled through the darkness and found the fridge. Opening it, he grabbed a bottle, not even caring what it was, and carried it to the couch. He hadn't had a drink in some time, and while he was able to ignore it in Stalliongrad, he couldn't stand the withdrawal symptoms in Ponyville. He chugged the bottle, noticing the taste of cider, until nothing was left. 

"Just what he doctor ordered," he muttered to himself as he relaxed on the couch and yawned. "Maybe I'll just have a little nap."

. . .

"Alright guys," came Dempsey's voice as he walked into the main control room. "I got all three landers. I think we're ready to go."

Richtofen analyzed the controls, doing his best to decipher the Cyrillic. "Oh, I knew I should have invested in a Russian class," he muttered.

"Uh, the rocket's turned green, Doc."

Richtofen turned to look at the real rocket. "No, Dempshey, you idiot. It looks perfectly normal."

"The rocket on the screen," Takeo corrected in a frustrated tone.

Richtofen glanced at the screen and noticed that the symbol for the rocket did indeed radiate a bright green color. "Well, I guess every dog has his day, Dempshey."

"Yeah, whatever," The marine grumbled lowly.

"Right," Richtofen continued, not hearing Dempsey's comment. "Now we have to get on the rocket and reach the moon. There's just one problem though," he gestured to the the controls. "The controls are here," and then he pointed at the rocket. "And the rocket is all the way over there."

Dempsey frowned. "So you're saying one of us will be left behind?"

Richtofen smiled deviously at Dempsey. "Why, yes. It was fun knowing you Dempsey, but it looks like this is where we part ways. You see, while you rode the landers around and did the grunt work, Takeo and I made plans to leave you behind to do one last thing for us," Richtofen smiled a wide, guilt-free smile. "Come, Takeo, let's get to the rocket."

Richtofen's lack of hesitance didn't get to Dempsey, what got to him was Takeo's. The quiet Japanese man gave one quick glance at Dempsey, and thought about the choice that lay before him. On one hand, leaving Dempsey behind was a horrible choice, as it left him with no real allies on his quest against Richtofen. On the other, he knew that Dempsey's amnesia hadn't worn off yet, and as much as the marine hated Richtofen, he was too stupid to be anything more than a pawn. In the end, the choice was obvious for Takeo.

"I wish I didn't have to do this Dempsey, but do you really think you will get anywhere with just Richtofen. All you two do is fight. Maybe I can find something," Takeo gave a look of genuine shame. "I'm sorry."

Dempsey had trouble processing this betrayal. "So that's it? You're both just gonna leave me!?" He roared. Richtofen was slightly taken aback, but Takeo did not visibly react.  "After all I've done for you both! Takeo," Dempsey pleaded. "I've always seen you as a friend, trustworthy," The fear on Dempsey's face was evident now. "You can't be serious."

"My decision has been made."

"Then. . ." Dempsey searched for the right words. "Then fuck you both! I'll find Nikolai by myself, and I'll let him know that both of you left him! You bastards!"

"Call us what you may," Richtofen still wore his shit-eating grin. "But just don't follow us."

Richtofen walked out without saying another word, heading to the rocket.

Takeo stared at Dempsey for a long time, as if he wanted to tell the American something. However, in the end, all that was said was a simple "I'm sorry" and nothing more.

"Oh, sure you are," Dempsey frowned. "Get out of my sight, you traitor."

Takeo bowed silently and left the room, and for the first time in a long time, Dempsey felt truly alone.

. . .

"Hey, Nikolai," was the first thing Nikolai heard upon awaking. It was Berry's voice, but Nikolai didn't answer, still half-asleep.

"Nikolai, wake up please," Berry said again after a few seconds. 

"Eh, five more minutes, mother," he muttered.

Berry shrugged and hopped onto Nikolai's lap. Of course, the weight of the pony's body was enough to jerk Nikolai up with a wheeze. Upon realizing what woke him up, he gave a small frown.

"Alright," he yawned. "What's up?"

"Somepony's at the door for you," Berry nodded at the door. "Oh, and you're on my couch."

Nikolai sat up and motioned for Berry to get off of him. When she did, he walked up to the door and swung it open.

Just as he expected, he was face-to-face with an orange earth pony. "Applejack," Nikolai yawned. "It is good to see you again."

"And you too," Applejack smiled brightly. " Y'all still down for some cider?"

Nikolai playfully scoffed. "As if Nikolai would ever turn down a free drink," he glanced back at Berry. "Berry, would you like to come along?" 

Nikolai didn't notice Applejack's expression change. "Uhh, no, she can't."

"Why not?" Nikolai raised an eyebrow.

"Well. . . Umm," Applejack searched for an answer. "She owes me some bits already."

"I don't owe you shi-" Came Berry's voice, angrily confused. However, Nikolai cut her off before she could finish her sentence.

"Well, when I get more pay I'll pay off her debts."

"Um. . . She owes about 500."

"What the hay are you talking about?" Berry glared.

"Sorry, we gotta go!" Applejack explained rapidly and shut the door in Berry's face. 

. . .

Sweet Apple Acres was a beautiful place to be in the evenings. The sun, low on the horizon, would bask the orchards and hilltops in an orange glow unlike anything else in Equestria. It was far enough from the hustle and bustle of town, but it wasn't a long walk from home either. To Applejack, it was the perfect place to be. To Nikolai. . . Well, er, let's just say he had something else on his mind.

"So, how have things been for 'ya?" Applejack struck up a conversation. "It must be mighty hard to just hafta' change worlds like this."

Nikolai shoved his thoughts of Stalliongrad aside for now, wanting to enjoy his night. Stalliongrad could wait until tomorrow. "Eh, not bad. Equestria is a strange place."

"And 'ah bet Russia would be a strange place for me, too."

Nikolai thought back to his homeland. "Perhaps. Just stay away from the north."

"Why?" Applejack inquired.

Nikolai's eyes narrowed. "If the cold doesn't get you, the gulag will."

"The gulag?"

"Never mind," Nikolai shrugged off. "Hey, look, I see the farmhouse."

Applejack took a good long look at the scene before her, the sun setting right over the barn, and smiled. "Beautiful, ain't it?"

Nikolai shrugged. "I've seen worse."

Applejack facehoofed, as she had momentarily forgotten that Nikolai was not a subtle man. He was as blunt as a two-by-four.

"Uh, yeah. Anyway, Apple Bloom and her friends are at the clubhouse, Big Mac's probably out n' the fields, and ole' Granny's probably takin' a nap," she put a goof around Nikolai and gave him a sly smile. "It looks like we have the whole place to ourselves."

Now, Nikolai may not have been very subtle, but he wasn't incompetently stupid. He was almost certain that Applejack was coming on to him. He decided to play it safe just in case he was wrong. "I'm OK with that."

Applejack smiled. "I thought you would be."


Applejack was the one that opened the front door and she trotted in first. She smiled to herself. Everything was going just the way it should be.

"So," Nikolai stretched as he entered in behind her, having to duck slightly to get inside. "Where do you keep the cid-"

His voice halted when he saw another particular mare in the building, and he instantly glared at her. She returned it.

"So, Nikolai," she began. "I was hoping I wouldn't see you for a while. I guess that was too good to be true."

The feeling is mutual, Rainbow Pony."

"Dash," she growled. "Call me Dash."

"Whatever," Nikolai frowned, taking a seat at the table. "So, what are you doing here?"

"I got invited here by Applejack. You?"

"Same."

They both stared at Applejack, now realizing that it was a set-up. The earth pony smiled and sat down between them, passing then both a mug of cider. 

"Yeah. I don't know if I'm thirsty anymore," Rainbow stood to leave. "Smelly apes spoil my appetite."

"Then that leaves more for me, Rainbow Bitch," Nikolai taunted as he began to drink from his own mug.

Rainbow Dash stopped in her tracks and turned to Nikolai, a look of pure rage on her face. "What did you just call me?"

"You heard me," Nikolai managed between gulps.

Applejack was beginning to become nervous. Her plan to patch things up between these two rude rivals was going horribly wrong, and the tension in the room was escalating to fight levels in a matter of seconds. "How 'bout we just sit on down and enjoy the cider." She spoke timidly. 

Of course, neither were really in the mood for a diplomatic solution. Rainbow Dash hovered into Nikolai's face, her snout to his nose. Both glared daggers into another.

Nikolai suddenly stood. "I think Nikolai should go home."

Applejack rushed to the door and blocked it. "No, no, you're not leaving yet."

"Nikolai is simply trying to avoid a conflict," he scowled. 

"But ya'll have a lot in common," Applejack assured. "Don't go."

Nikolai paused, and then sat back down. "Fine," he muttered just loud enough to be heard. "So, Rainbow," he tried to make conversation. "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a weatherpony," she blankly replied.

"Oh. That's nice, I guess."

Things remained deathly quiet for several minutes as the three parties sipped on their mugs. Rainbow Dash avoided Nikolai's gaze, and Nikolai avoided hers. Every attempt for Applejack to initiate a three-way conversation ended in failure, only further distancing the two. 

It didn't come as a surprise that Nikolai finished his mug first. "OK, this. . . whatever, was clearly a failure. Nikolai is going home."

Applejack sighed. "Fine. Ah'm sorry fir the trouble. 'Ah just thought I could patch things up."

"Yeah, don't worry, Nikolai is not mad. Just frustrated. Bye, Rainbow Bitch," he nodded at Dash as he stood up.

Rainbow had enough. "It's DASH!" She roared so loudly that she probably woke up Granny Smith. "You ugly hairless freak!"

"Now stop it!" Applejack exclaimed, trying her darnedest to restore order to the kitchen. "Both of y'all are acting like foals!"

Unfortunately for her, neither party heeded her commands. "Take that back!" Nikolai snarled.

"Wanna go!?" Rainbow aggressively flew into Nikolai until they were once again snout-to-nose. 

"Sure," Nikolai sneered.

"Oh, Celestia, no," Applejack whimpered as she dove under cover, hoping she wouldn't get between the two as they began to brawl in the kitchen.

. . .

Nikolai opened the door to Berry's house and limped his way in. The fight had left him with a black eye and a very sore body, and he could swear Rainbow cracked some of his ribs. He was gonna hurt in the morning.

"Nikolai?" came Berry from the couch. "What in Celestia's name happened to you?"

"I got into a fight with Rainbow Bitch," he muttered painfully.

"Oh, shit," Berry muttered. "That was a big mistake. The last pony to fight Rainbow Dash was hospitalized, and she was the most muscular pony in Ponyville, hence the name Muscle Mare."

Nikolai, though in pain, allowed himself a sly smile as he sat down next to her. "Oh, she didn't walk away with nothing. Let's just say she won't be flying for a few days."

Berry's eyes widened. "You broke her wing!?" Then she laughed. "Well, I can't say she didn't have it coming. She's a bitch."

Nikolai joined in with a small chuckle. "Yeah, I guess she did."

Their eyes met, and for a few moments, and they leaned in closer until their mouths almost touched. The silence was awkward, but the moment felt right.

Well, it did, until Nikolai realized he was about to kiss a pony, and he pulled back. 

"Well, I suppose it's getting late, and I have a big day tomorrow, so I think I'll just go up and sleep tonight," he said awkwardly, getting up off the couch and backing onto the staircase. "See you in the morning."

Berry was unsure what to say, or even how to react to what almost happened. "Uh, yeah, sure, see you then."