Chapter 5: Deep Hurting
It took a few minutes or so but Tom Servo and Twilight has finally calm down from their break downs. The group decided to lay low on any Canadian bashing for a while.
The humans sat up front while their non-human friends sat in the back, calming down a bit. Tricia is sitting with them, still silent and monotone. What Mike, Joel and Twilight said to her earlier...has really hit the woman hard.
"Wow, you would've feel sorry for her." Rarity said, glancing at Tricia in concern. "The poor darling."
"What's so poor about her? All she did was shoot and cursed at us since she show up." Rainbow said bored. "Worst OC ever."
"Come on, that ain't true. It's like making fun of someone's OCs for being Sues which they ain't." Pinkie said to Rainbow with a frown.
"Random again, Pinks, random."
"Say, I have an idea." Gypsy said thoughtfully. "Why don't we give Tricia more time and help her?"
"Why?" Crow ask, blinking. "She is useless like the furry guy in "Rock-A-Doodle"."
"Yeah, who is he? A damn Scrappy?" Tom Servo ask with a chuckle.
"Whoa, whoa! No need to..." Pinkie was interrupted as a cell phone is heard. "Huh? What's that?"
"Just my communication wrist I made in case someone from another world is calling." Twilight explains as she holds up a special watch and answers it, confused. "Hello?"
"Oh!" Another Twilight responded. "Um... sorry. I'm trying to reach the Total Drama-Verse."
"Oh, that." Twilight sighed. "Just tell Discord to wire the watch, it should be to the left of a now-decaying Fictional Chronicles universe. If you've reached the decaying Cartoon's Final Fantasy universe, you went too far."
"Twilight, come on!" Joel shouted.
"Yeah! We're getting close to the Greek areas!" Crow shouted as Tom Servo is looking in.
"Is that you?" Tom Servo asked.
"Okay, you know the way, good-bye!" Twilight said as she hung up the watch.
"What 'de heck was 'dat?" Applejack ask, blinking a bit.
"Just a cameo from one of Jus's completed works!" Pinkie exclaims happily.
"Okay, we're here...wherever the hell we are." Zapp grumbles as the car arrives in the Greek areas. "Are they be wearing dresses?"
"Togas, Zapp, togas." Troy corrects his drunken Canadian friend.
The car stops as everyone got out. Joel spoke out, "Okay, everyone. We're about to enter a new area of pain. So rules? Don't drink the water, it may help you forget. Don't take any drink given by some woman who worked with men from outer space..."
"And if you run into any sandstorms..." Tom Servo said grimly to the others.
"We're screwed!" The robots exclaims in worry and sadness.
"Other than that, nothing much to worry about." Rainbow remarks with a shrug.
"Hey, Tricia? Miss?" Troy ask Tricia who stayed in the back. "Aren't you coming?"
"Why bother? I'm useless, no one likes me, I shouldn't even show up or even got on that ship." Tricia said in her usual monotone voice. "I probably should just stay put."
"Wow, looks like we really hit her hard with our "You Suck" speech." Mike said in concern, noting how Tricia is like this since the humans and Twilight told her off. "Anyone got any ideas?"
"We will drag her." Rainbow remarks as she picks up Tricia from the seat. "Come on, let's get moving."
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Elsewhere, TV's Frank and Dr. Erhardt was watching the arriving on their TV.
"Hmmm, they're here." Dr. Erhardt said with a thoughtful look. "So what shall we do?"
"Oooooh, I got an idea. Let's do a Hercules on them." TV's Frank remarks with a chuckle. "I mean, sending in bad guy after bad guy. How cliché!"
"Yeah...but we may need to do the bad guy thing in one of the tasks."
"Ooooh, and I got a special one."
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The group moves on their way. Tricia didn't say a word or doesn't want to.
"Halt!" A figure in armor exclaims, blocking their way. "None shall pass!"
"What, are we in Monty Python now?" Joel ask with a frown on his face.
"Spam, spam, spam, wonderful spam!" The robots exclaims, repeating spasm.
"We got to get through, good sir." Fluttershy said, blinking cutely. "So if you don't..."
Fluttershy yelps as the figure blocks her with his sword. He booms, "None shall pass....unless thou passed the 3 tasks!"
"Okay, what are the 3 tasks?" Mike ask the figure, blinking a bit.
"Beat the humongous Cyclops!"
"What Cy..." Rarity yelps as a foot stomps near her, causing her to scream. "Oh my goodness!"
A huge Cyclops appears, roaring and laughing like mad. The gang gapes at how big he is. They got to beat him to complete the first task?
"How are we going to get past this Cyclops..." Rarity sighed as they looked up at the huge Cyclops.
The Cyclops just stomped over as he glared down... before he started talking in a dumb accent. "So, you think you can beat me in a combat match, do you?"
"Well... pretty much, yes." Rainbow frowned.
"Oh, no, no, no! You did not just say that. I did not hear that! There ain't no way I am going to be beaten by some four-legged, different colored, fairy-tale-cliché, little ponies. Get up outta here!" The Cyclops ordered.
Twilight glared as all six ponies went into a fighting stance at the Cyclops as she said, "Bring it..."
The Cyclops just laughed artily as he grew two more arms and grabbed a hammer and club respectively as he started to charge right up at the ponies...
As the fighting was going on, Mike and Joel were watching as Crow frowned. "Are we even being used for battles at this point?"
"Yeah, we're doing less battling on our end and more 'just comment on the enemies'." Tom explained as he sighed. "I mean, Joel, you'll occasionally pull out a weapon, but that's about it."
"Yeah... most of the battles were either taken care of by the ponies..." Joel nodded.
"To be fair, though, at least THIS TIME, it's the ponies fighting. In Total Drama Equestria, they didn't even get used for battles." Mike explained.
"Yeah, the Total Drama cast did most of the battling." Gypsy explained.
"True that, true that." Crow said as the ponies defeated the Cyclops and pushed them down the road.
"Okay, we have defeated the first task!" Twilight said in delight as she turned to Tricia Leonard. "Isn't it crazy?"
Tricia just stared in silence.
"Right?" Twilight paused.
Tricia still stared in silence.
"Are you mad?" Twilight asked.
"Go fuck yourselves." Tricia growled as she turned around.
"What, are you going to throw a hissy fit now that..." Twilight started.
"Look, guys, I'm REALLY not in the mood for this bullshit right now!" Tricia frowned.
"You know, Tricia, you're supposed to be a crucial part to the team!" Mike sighed. "What if we got captured and we need your help or some-"
"Look!" Tricia frowned as she turned to everyone. "If you guys need help beating a tough enemy you can't beat OR you need an invention for a certain situation, I'll help you out! I'm just not in the mood for conversation right now, okay?"
"All right, fine." Pinkie said as she and the others turned away. "None of us wanted to talk to you anyway."
"Well, it seems you have beaten your first task... now for the second task..." The figure started.
"Well, go ahead." Gypsy said to the figure with a nod.
"Solve my riddle: what...does Napoleon say at the Battle of Waterloo?" The figure ask sternly.
"I give up." Joel remarks with a shrug.
"Damn. They always get that one right. One more task: a couple of guys with swords charging at you and falling off the cliff!"
The group saw a couple of guys yelling as they charge at them with swords. Troy and Zapp moved out of the way, causing the enemies to fall off the cliff screaming.
"It's hard to get good extras these days." Tom Servo remarks with a sigh.
"Aw, just go already!" The figure snaps to the ponies sternly.
"Finally, we won!" Twilight giggles as she and her pals goes past the figure.
"Halt!" The figure said as he stops Mike. "Your friends did most but all you did is jackcrap! Fight me in battle if you wish to past!
"You're kidding." Mike snaps in annoyance, yelping as the figure got his sword out.
"Thou shall not pass!'
"Fine. Someone give me a weapon!"
Rarity grabs a sword that was dropped and passed it to Mike. The man dodges the figure's sword as he cut his arm off.
"There, now stand aside!" Mike exclaims to the figure in satisfaction.
"Nay, naïve; 'Tis but a scratch." The figure insists much to the group's disbelief.
"A scratch?! Your arm's off!!" Mike protests to the figure in disbelief.
"No it isn't!"
Rarity points to the arm on the ground, demanding, "Then what's that then?"
The figure, glancing, respond, "I've had worse."
"Yer're a liar!" Applejack exclaims in disbelief.
"Come on, you pansy!!"
The two fighters clash swords once and more, making around until the other arm of the figure was chopped. Mike, smirking, said, "All right! I kicked butt! Now..." Without warning, the figure kicks him down. "WHAT THE HELL!?"
"Come on then!" The figure exclaims moving around as he kicks some more. "Have at you!!"
"Are you kidding?" Spike yells at the figure in disbelief.
"Ooooh, had enough eh?"
"Ya dumbass, look at yourself! You got no arms!!" Mike exclaims pissed. This guy is really pissing him off!
"Yes I have!" The figure insists in denial. The heroes look disbelief. Is this guy stupid or what?
"No, look!!" Spike exclaims, pointing out the missing arm.
"Just a flesh wound!"
The figure kicks at Mike, making him yelp in annoyance, "Will you stop that?!"
The figure smirks as he did some mock clucking, "Chicken! Bawk bawk bawk! Chicken!!"
"If you don't stop that, I will cut off your leg!" Mike yelps as the figure kicks at him again. "Well, I warned you!"
The figure yelps as Mike cuts one of the figure's legs off...but all he does is hops around, regardless.
"Right! I'll do you for that!" The figure remarks stupidly.
"What?" Fluttershy ask confused, having no idea what he's on about.
"Oh brother!" Crow exclaims, rolling his eyes in disbelief.
"Come here!!" The figure exclaims, hopping about. The heroes couldn't believe it. All that and he still wants to fight?!
"What are you gonna do, bleed on me?" Mike ask the figure in annoyance.
"I'M INVINCIBLE!!"
"You're a looney." Joel snaps at the figure in annoyance.
"Just cut off his other leg so we can leave!" Applejack snaps to Tricia in annoyance.
"The warrior ALWAYS triumphs!!" The figure laughs as he kept on hopping. "Have at you!!"
"OH SHUT UP!" Mike screams as he cuts off the figure's other leg, sending him to the ground. The opponent looks at himself, he has no limbs left!
"Okay, we'll call it a draw."
"Let's go, can we go?" Rainbow ask impatiently, crossing her arms.
"Right, I feel stupid even around this idiot." Zapp complains with Troy nodding in agreement.
The group moves onward to the next area. As the figure watch them go, he yells out tauntingly, "Oh! Had enough, eh? Come back and take what's coming to you, you yellow bastards!! Come back here and take what's coming to you! I'll bite your legs off!"
"SHUT UP!!!!" Most of the group snaps in irritation at the figure.
"Okay, the next elements should be over there." Mike said as he looks at the device to locate the next elements.
"And the next part of this chapter is even further." Pinkie said with a groan.
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"Well, I got to admit, they did alright." Dr. Erhardt said in observation.
"I agree. Ooooh, I got an idea. Something Steve and I once inflicted on Joel and the robots during "Hercules Vs. The Moon Men"." TV's Frank said with a slight grin. "You're going to love it...or don't! Ha ha ha!"
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The group are in a desert like area, following the device.
"Well, good work back there, Tricia." Joel said to Tricia, impressed.
"Screw it. I only did it because he won't let me by." Tricia remarks with a scoff.
"Okay, we should be getting closer." Twilight said, looking at the idea. Wind begins to pick up. "Boy, the wind is picking up."
"Yeah, sand is blowing around." Crow comments. Then a hint of horror hits him. "Sand is blowing around?!"
"Oh no, NO! NOT THIS!!!" Tom Servo screams frantically.
Sand blows around like mad. Fluttershy gasps, "Oh dear, what is this?"
"No, the sandstorm scene from the Hercules film with the moon guys!" Joel complains frantically. "Also known as..."
"Deep Hurting, Deep Hurting!" Joel and the robots exclaims frantically.
"What is it?" Rainbow ask, trying to see through the sandstorm in concern.
"It's when guys wander around with no action happening!" Tom Servo complains frantically.
"Oh great!" Zapp groans as he moves his hands in front of his face. "As if my day isn't screwed up as it is!"
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Indeed, a massive sand storm had overcome the entire place... even in Equestria, as people had difficulty seeing what was going on...
The sand started to blow... and it blew... and it blew...
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(To the tune of "The Rain Rain Rain Came Down Down Down" from "The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh")
(Chorus)
The sandy storm
Came blowing in,
Less than twelve minutes,
And in the middle of that stormy weather,
It went right to Mr. Clayton!
Meanwhile, with Pearl, Brain Guy, Bobo and Dr. Forrester, they were getting close as all of a sudden, Clayton felt sand everywhere.
"What the?" Clayton said in shock as sand started to hit his eyes.
That Clayton, he was pissed off,
He had a thing to bill,
And he went to the cliff and...
Yelled right to the hill!
Dr. Forrester frowned as he went to the hill and started yelling, "FRANK! ERDHART! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU FOR THIS!"
His echoes started going...
Hoping that it reached their ears...
"Clay! Help us read this, will you?" Pearl called to Dr. Forrester as he came over.
And the sandy storm
Came blowing in,
So Clayton started readin'!
"Okay, let's see... if we go left..." Clayton said as he tried to squint at the machine through the sand storm.
They were unaware,
Atop the cliff,
While readin', they were losing!
And the sandy storm
Came blowing in,
And Groudon's using his Earthquake!
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With the ponies, Mike, Joel, the bots, Tricia, Troy and Rowsdower, they were trying to get through the sandstorm.
With the others, they all thought...
"We need special glasses." Joel sighed as everyone nodded, Pinkie pulling out special goggles.
Fifteen glasses they needed,
Enough to see them through,
But as they started to walk off...
They all got swept away!
"Say what?" Tom said in shock as everyone suddenly got swept away.
And the sandstorm twirled and tossed them,
In a very mess-y spot!
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Frank and Erdhart blinked as they just looked around, wondering where the music came from... but then, all of a sudden... Joel, Mike and the others just appeared out of nowhere.
"Oh crap!" Frank jumped. "How did you get here so fast?"
"Uh... power of music, I guess?" Joel said, everyone else still continued on where the music came from.
"Seriously, the author decided a song parody was the best way to get us through?" Pinkie asked.
"Uh... see ya!" Erdhart grabbed the two elements and used a smoke bomb to blind the others as he and Frank got away.
Twilight groaned. "After them, quick!"
"Yay! Cue the music!" Pinkie giggles as she got out a stereo and turns it on. Benny Hill music begins to play.
"Benny Hill?!" The robots groans out in disbelief and annoyance.
Still, everyone chases the two all over the place, going over hills, through forest, doing so quickly.
"Does anyone notice we change scenes quickly?" Rainbow ask, noting how some parts of the areas looks like they are changing woods.
"It happened in Gunslinger; it’s confusing!" Joel explains. He yelps as TV's Frank appears, firing at the group. "Hey!"
"Oh, it's the same trick I told you guys about, remember?" Tom Servo ask with a grin on his face.
"How does it work?" Troy ask Tom Servo curiously.
"Ugh, I hate your voice. Watch!"
Tom Servo zips off...and appears near TV's Frank. The villain yelps as he runs off.
"How did he get there?" Spike yelps in shock and confusion.
"Easy!" Pinkie exclaims as she disappears and reappears near Tom. "Now you try!"
"Forget it, I am keeping my sanity for this!"
The group continues chasing the bad guys, heading to a doors area. Tricia groans, "Aww, shit. Not this bit with the doors."
The two villains separate and rush into the doors with the others chasing them, going into separate door. One door opens with Erhardt being chased by Tricia and Rarity into another door. Another door opens with Spike and Fluttershy chasing TV's Frank. A waiter somehow appears with a plate of glasses, walking down...only for Twilight and Mike to crash into him, causing the waiter to drop his stuff as they pass by.
"Sacre bleu!" The waiter groans as he got up and heads away.
Another door opens...as Fluttershy and some ducks rush through into another door. Yet another door opens as the villains are chasing the robots quickly. Soon Tricia rush down and collides into Erhardt, causing all doors to open, with everyone peeking out in shock. Once the doors are closed yet again, the waiter came back.
"This time, moi won't drop them." The waiter said with a grunt.
However all the doors opens as everyone rush in and out through them. The waiter yelps as he dodges quickly. When everyone is gone, he sighs...
Only for Pinkie to knock him from behind, exclaiming, "Sorry!" The waiter hits the floor, crashing his stuff anyway.
"Damn it! Moi hates this bit!" The waiter complains.
The chase ends in an arena where the heroes are at...but no bad guys.
"Now where them vermints went off 'ta?" Applejack ask with a deep frown, looking around.
"So, looks like they won't give up?" Dr. Earhardt's voice taunts. "Bwa ha ha ha ha, and ha some more!'
"Well, if you wish to beat us, you must go after us in a contest of skills, in a game appropriate for Hercules!" TV's Frank exclaims in determination.
"In a game we like to call..."
Lights came on as the heroes saw an intense obstacle course, right out of...
"AMERICAN GLADIATORS!!!!" The two villains' voices boom out.
"American Gladiators?" The ponies ask bewildered and confused. They haven't seen anything like this before.
"How about you let us deal with this?" Mike ask the ponies in concern. "You got the fighting so far."
"Uh huh. And how are you going to deal with that?" Rainbow ask dryly, pointing to the treadmills in one part, the hand bikes on the second part, the wall on the third one, which ends on two platforms where a huge American Gladiator is on, waiting with his big stick thingie.
"Okay, you can work with us."
Pinkie then zoomed up as she beat the treadmills, rode the bikes, went over the wall, and then pushed the gladiator off the path as he fell right down. "WHOO!"
Everybody just stared dumbfounded... as TV's Frank coughed, putting the gladiator back. "Well... if she can do it... I suppose the rest of you can."
Everybody else nodded as they started to do the obstacle course, but they were having a bit of trouble as they tried to go over the treadmills.
As Pinkie was sitting next to Frank and Erdhardt, she turned to them and said, "Say... back in the early chapters, Erdhardt, you were jealous of Frank. What changed your mind?"
"You were jealous?" Frank asked. "Why?"
Erdhardt groaned. "Because I thought Forrester wouldn't replace me! I guess I was wrong on that part!"
"Oh, come on." Frank sighed. "Look, I was told by Forrester you got eaten by a giant spider."
Erdhardt frowned. "Where did you get that dumb idea?"
"I don't know, maybe it was one of the movies Joel and the Bots riffed..." Frank said.
"Oh, was it?" Erdhardt glared. "Well, I know I'm giving Clay a piece of my mind! Frank, would you be willing to come with me?"
"Certainly!" Frank smiled as he handed Pinkie the Elements. "Here you go. Didn't need them anyway. See ya later!"
With that, Frank and Erdhardt ran out as Pinkie squealed at the delight of getting two elements.
"YAY! We are about done!" Pinkie said as Twilight, her friends, Joel, Mike and the bots and the ever-so silent Tricia came in. "Twilight, we beat the bad guys! Teleport those bad boys!"
"You got it!" Twilight said as she teleported the Element of Honesty and Element of Kindness out of the scene.
"Okay... that leaves just..." Pinkie started... as Cambot flickered and gave a picture of Pearl and Clayton, still in their forms.
"That's right, the Element of Randomness!" Pearl shouted.
"You mean the Element of Surprise?" Clayton blinked.
"Element of Laughter?" Brain Guy blinked.
"Element of Oatmeal?" Bobo just shrugged.
"Element of Ice Cream?" Frank paused.
"Element of Happiness?" Dr. Erdhardt blinked.
"It's the Element of Laughter." Pinkie groaned. "Stop butchering my element's name!"
"Well, whatever! We got it!" Pearl frowned. "And if you want to come near us... you have to go to the final level..."
"Final level?" Twilight blinked.
"Uh, Twilight, would you be a dear and help me out, please?" Celestia's voice was heard.
Everybody gasped. "PRINCESS CELESTIA!"
"Would you believe I found the Element of Laughter RIGHT under Celestia's throne?" Pearl smiled, holding up the Element. "I'm telling you; that was incredibly lucky!"
"Well, TTFN, ta ta for now! Push the button, Frank!" Clayton said as Frank obeyed, pushing the button.
"Oh shit..." Twilight gasped. "Forrester and his goons have the castle... WHERE THE OTHER ELEMENTS ARE! SHOOT!"
"Does this mean we have to go now?" Spike said.
"Yes, now, go!" Twilight said as everyone started panicking.
"Sheesh!" Tom Servo said, worried. "This is going to be big..."
"I know..." Crow groaned. "I have a feeling the next three chapters are going to be pretty epic..."
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The mother and son chuckles as they stare at the princesses, who are tied up and hung from the ceiling, with collars keeping their powers in check.
Forrester remarks, "I must confess, princesses, you two should've kept your guard down! No wonder your enemies took you down easily."
"And how do you even know that?" Luna ask dryly.
"Discord may not be in control of the body, but I got his memories...copies...oh well..."
"And now, the enemy will be here, ready to save the princess's princess!" Pearl exclaims with a cruel laugh. She stops, adding, "You know it's you, right Celestia?"
"Uh, I'm only her mentor. I'm not like that." Celestia remarks, although a blush is seen on her face.
"Oh please! Only an idiot would not know that your student got a thing for you and you wise versa!"
"Well, it's true. You do talked about her, planning on being with her forever, sister." Luna said with a giggle, making her sister blush some more.
"S-s-s-shut up! We're not turning this into a love fest!" Celestia insists, trying to keep herself under control. "Ahem. Princess Twilight Sparkle, the humans and their friends will be here to stop you. You aren't like Tirek. You may look like Discord or Chrysalis, but..."
"But nothing! We have tortured two guys and a couple of robots up to now. And now, we will show how wicked we truly are! Ha ha ha ha!" Pearl exclaims with an evil laugh, rubbing his hooves together.
Forester suggest "Why don't we recruit some of THIS universe's monsters to back up our diversion? Something appropriate for an ancient city-type setting?"
"Maybe...when we get the time, son. Trust me. Actually, we do!"
The two villains leave, leaving the princesses by themselves. Luna pauses as she spoke, "So if Twilight was a stallion, would you still have him?"
"WILL THOU LEAVE OUR LOVE LIFE OUT OF THIS?!" Celestia exclaims, yelling in annoyance and frustration. They are trapped with the elements in danger, and her sister wants to discuss her relationship with Twilight!