//------------------------------// // Obey The Laws of Manaan, Pegasus // Story: Ynanhluutr // by Imploding Colon //------------------------------// With a shrug of his feathery shoulders, Wildcard dumped the guard's body onto the stone floor of the Southern Hoof's Armory. He pivoted around—then froze in place. His head lifted, the mercenary's beak opening slowly while glittering gold metals reflected off his lenses. All across the chamber, stacks upon stacks of shiny trinkets and jewels lay on neatly-arranged shelves. One particular rack held multiple fin-cuffs studded with rubies and sapphires, and another lattice was draped over with all manner of shiny platinum necklaces. “As you can see,” Remna slurred, his eyes piercing bright green as he shuffled ahead. “We have a lovely view of the Shoggothian Abyss.” He gestured past a thin metal grate to where a telekinetic wall of water loomed. The henchstallion pivoted to the left. “Over there you'll find some deep sea swimming suits. Next to it is a control valve that'll open the grate.” He then pivoted to the right. “And on this side you can find several illegally pilfered bits of royal trinkets from the upper tombs of the Royal Sirens.” His ears twitched. “I like potatoes,” he droned. “Holy hell biscuits,” Bard whistled, gawking at the array of gold items. “So these sons of bitches have been robbing from the Princess' dead relatives all this time?” “Uh huh.” Rainbow squirmed. “Would you mind freeing 'Echo' from these binds, now?” Wildcard reached in, assisting the stallion as both Desperadoes undid Rainbow's bindings. “Land's sakes...” Bard shook his head with a dumb grin. “Bet the only reason they've stayed on top of their game is 'cuz they've been pawning off the sea ponies' artifacts to the black market all this time.” He turned and kindly helped the mare to the floor. “Screw mercenaryin'. Reckon we're in the wrong business, Dubya-Cee?” Wildcard shrugged. “Well, we're about to put a stop to all of this horse hockey,” Rainbow Dash said, twirling to face the others. “You brought the stuff, bright eyes?” Wildcard nodded. He reached into his satchel, produced Theanim's camera, then handed it over to Rainbow Dash. “We take several pictures for evidence...” Rainbow squatted down low, taking snap after snap of the aforementioned shots. “I carry this camera in and out of the Next Seed...” She pivoted and took more shots of the opposite side of the Armory. “I rendezvous with the Doc right as he's laying the smackdown on the Syndicate before the Marine Auction House...” She lowered the camera, smiling. “...and once this stuff is developed, then the Southern Hoof won't have a leg to stand on.” “Or a flipper to swim on,” Bard said with a smirk. “Boom. Done.” Rainbow pumped a hoof in the air. “Both halves of the Syndicate are obliterated during the course of a weekend.” She grinned proudly. “How's that for making history?” “I once peed in the seaponies' drinking water,” Remna drooled. Bard pointed at the eye-glowing guard. “Kinda makes ya wonder why Her Highness hasn't tried to pull the roots out from under the Bad Guy Tree to begin with.” Wildcard nodded. “Well, she's never had an opportunity like this before!” Rainbow said. “Imagine if she had tried this before we came along! What—would she send in one of her very own guards to get a brain-controlled escort into the Stronghold? These punks would see right through that in an instant!” Rainbow shook her head, sliding the camera into a water-proof pouch within her saddlebag. “Besides, the Northern Hoof would just come and bail them out. But us? We already did half of the work for her. Plus, Theanim's got leverage, and he's about to lay the hammer down.” “Nah, I dun think it's like that one bit.” Bard smirked, pointing at the pegasus. “Camellia sees somethin' special in you. Reckon it's the same dayum thang that makes Theanim stick around yer feisty keister.” “Yeah, well, he won't have to stick around it for long,” Rainbow Dash said, zipping and folding her bags up. “In fact, none of you have to.” She gestured at Remna. “Ask Whinny Flankspeare here. He's bound to show you the way to a stash of Syndicate bars.” Green flickering eyes. “Panties.” “And me? Once I've taken my dip into the Royal Tomb and dropped the camera off with Theanim, it's on to my next destination.” Rainbow paused to give a shuddering sigh. “Rohbredden Proper, I bet.” Bard and Wildcard exchanged glances, then looked at her. “Ya dun say...” “I do.” Rainbow suddenly jerked, glancing to her left. She smiled. “Good eye, Rarity.” She galloped over towards an equipment locker and flung it open. There, several slick, pressurized jumpsuits of blue and gold rested. “Awesome. There's enough for all of us.” She tapped a group of mana-powered oxygen tanks. “Are they full of air, Twilight?” A pause. Rainbow eventually exhaled with relief. “Alright...” She looked over her shoulder. “I'd better get going. If I were you, I wouldn't stick around for very long either. Judging from when Camellia first warned me about Revan, the Northern Hoof's boss should be here any moment now. I doubt you wanna be around for when he shows up.” She reached over and jerked the lever. With a loud buzz, the metal grate in front of the magic water wall slowly opened up, exposing the chamber to the ocean's floor immediately outside. “Especially someplace this deep down,” Rainbow said. “Uhhhh...” Bard adjusted his hat. “Y'know, darlin', we've been thinkin' about that.” “Uh huh...” Rainbow yanked the first watertight outfit down and started fishing around for the opening. “And, the way we figure it, t'ain't no good swimmin' underwater with a heapin' bunch of metal bars strapped to our drawers.” Bard leaned back with a smile. “After all, we'd just slow you down.” Rainbow Dash froze. She tilted her head up, muzzle agape. “What... what do you mean?” “I mean we're comin' with you, ya silly varmint,” Bard said. Wildcard nodded emphatically. Rainbow arched an eyebrow. “...you're kidding me, right?” “Not the last time I checked.” “Dudes...” Rainbow dropped the diving suit so she could gesture. “The place I'm heading to is super deep, super dark, super dank, and super dangerous.” “And since when did that stop you?” “But you forget! I'm me!” Rainbow frowned and pointed at them. “And you're you!” Wildcard and Bard exchanged glances. “We... got that part. For sure.” They looked at her again. “But the way we sees it, ya did a mighty fine job gettin' us rich up in Rust. Why, thanks to you, we have several thousand bits worth of platinum bars waitin' for us all stashed away'n'pretty in that underwater hotel. Hell, once we get back from Camellia's tomb, we can go fetch the fortune all the same!” “If we make it back,” Rainbow growled. “Camellia's only able to protect us so far, guys. She's only able to protect me so far!” She gestured. “And while I may not know what'll be waiting for me at the shrine, I've got a pretty good clue.” She gulped. “And it's not going to be pretty.” “Who says doin' the right thang has gotta be pretty?” “Huh?” Bard gestured at Wildcard. “You done saved Dubya-Cee's life.” While the griffon nodded, Bard bowed and said: “And I just can't get him to shuddup about payin' ya back most kindly.” He stood up straight with a smile. “Figured if gettin' ya to where you need to go is our way of gettin' even, then—shiet... why the hell not?” “For Pete's sake!” Rainbow's voice cracked. “I... I-I just don't get you two!” Her face hung between a smirk and a grimace. “Are you mercenaries or are you knights in shining armor?” “We're the Desperadoes,” Bard said, grinning warmly. “And there ain't no gettin' off this train we're on.” Wildcard punched his metal palm with his fist. Rainbow sighed, ears folding. “... ... ...well, I really don't have the time to make a fuss about it, I guess.” “Damn skippy.” “But if we're going to do this, then we're going to do it my way,” Rainbow said assertively. “And that means you follow my lead.” Bard saluted. “Just point, click, and we're there, darlin'!” “Seapony songs can't melt steel beams,” Remna burped. “Awwww shut up.”