Lonely, hollow, and empty, these were three words that Trixie could use to describe how she felt right now. The couch didn’t provide any comfort against the torment her heart was putting her through. Memories of Fluttershy unceasingly assaulted her mind.

Fluttershy had been one of the first fans to come up and talk to her after her show. Unlike most fans though, there had been something completely unique about Fluttershy. In a way Fluttershy had reminded Trixie of Moondancer, but at the same time she also reminded Trixie of Candle Light, before the incident.

The dark sky outside was dotted with stars, the moon was bright and full, and finally the cold night air blew through the open window. Without anything to warm her, Trixie’s bare back began freezing. Trixie had opened the window to get some fresh air, but after lying down, she lost all motivation to get back up and close the thing. Sure, she could use her magic to close it, but that would require concentration, she was too tired for that.

Maud walked over to the window and shut it. She stared at Trixie silently, a flat expression worn on her face. Trixie rolled away, and anger flashed through her body. At least Fluttershy would smile for me.

The anger vanished as quickly as it had appeared, leaving Trixie to feel hollow again. It’s not exactly Maud’s fault that she doesn’t show expression like Fluttershy did. It’s not Maud’s fault that Fluttershy was there at a time in which I really needed a friend. It’s not Maud’s fault… clearly this has to be my fault. All the mistakes, big and small, finally caught up to me and ruined everything.

“Lulu,” Maud said quietly. Trixie glanced over her shoulder to see Maud standing there.

Maud stepped back from the sudden volume. The anger left Trixie again and a quiet pain filled her. Trixie covered her head with her hooves. “I’m sorry, Maud. I didn’t mean it, I swear.”

Maud was silent for a long moment, Trixie began to believe that Maud was going to leave her alone, but then Maud said, “Is there anything I can do for you?”

Trixie laughed meanly; surprised at the sound of her own laughter she simply shook her head. “Just leave me alone.”

“Can I come back and check on you in a few minutes?” Maud asked, her voice sounded frail.

Fluttershy used to sound like that; I bet she’ll never sound confident again after what I did to her. Anger hit Trixie like a flood, and this time it wasn’t leaving. She peered back at Maud, and glowered at her. “You can do whatever you want, honey!” the last word was soaked in venom. ”After all, you always get your way, don’t you?”

Maud looked away and frowned. Without another word Maud walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. Trixie returned to her view of the upholstery of the couch, and closed her eyes. The anger faded a little, but a large part of it stayed with her. Trixie growled at the couch, and whispered, “It’s not fair. I just wanted friends, and family, I didn’t want to be a bully anymore, and now I’ve just bullied one of the only ponies who stayed beside me during all the worst parts of my life. “

A little louder she continued, “So what if she was obsessed with me? I don’t care about that, I just valued her friendship. She hurt me sure, but was that really a good enough reason to ruin our long lasting friendship?”

Even louder Trixie said, “Why do I have to screw up everything I touch. If it wasn’t for me, Fluttershy wouldn’t have hurt Maud. I don’t even know why I care so much, so what If Fluttershy was there for me after the incident, after school was over? That’s not a good enough reason for her to get away with hurting Maud like that…” in a quiet voice she added, “But what was the value of her friendship, what kind of treasure did I just toss down a gutter, to never retrieve?”

Trixie felt herself slipping away. The world becoming dim and quiet around her, but she could hear the sounds of somepony whimpering. Trixie tried to wake up and see who it was, but her strength was spent, the anger was gone now, and she fell away into the dark world of dreams.

The walls of the small room were blue, and the floor was tiled purple and white. Trixie sat uncomfortably on the couch, her eyes were dark, and she stared at the portrait on the wall. It was a portrait of Celestia, and all Trixie could do was stare bitterly at it. Minuette, Lyra, and Moondancer sat on the other couch all by themselves. Twilight Sparkle was sitting with her back against a wall, she stared off into space, her expression somewhere between scared and angry. Silence reigned supreme over this tiny room.

Minuette’s body tightened up, and she bit her lip. She narrowed her eyes at Trixie. Trixie looked away.

Lyra rubbed at her eyes, they were red and snot ran down her nose. “Why? Don’t we have magic?” She sniffled, “Magic can fix anything, right?”

Moondancer shook her head slowly. “The wound was cauterized to the touch. That dagger was made out of plasma or something like it, and we just can’t heal that kind of damage. Healing magic only speeds up the healing process that the body would naturally undergo. Since we can’t rejuvenate limbs naturally…”

Minuette’s eyes strained to put an invisible pressure on Trixie. She could almost feel the mare’s muscles tightening. “So what?” Minuette spat angrily. “She’s just going to be a stump for the rest of her life?”

Everypony cringed at the word ‘stump’, the thought of a unicorn losing their horn, their magic, was tragic enough alone. But when all Candle Light ever wanted to do was be good at magic, like Twilight Sparkle was, then it was made all the more painful.

The door opened up and everypony looked expectantly toward it. At first Trixie saw Candle Light, staring blankly, then she saw the wheelchair, and the mare behind it pushing her. Trixie’s heart fell out of her chest and onto to the floor where it proceeded to die. The mare had white fur, and a short red mane. She stepped away from the wheelchair and stared at the room.

“My name is Flow, and it’s my job to ask you who this mare’s parents are. They need to be contacted right away,” the mare said.

Twilight looked up at her, and spoke with all the enthusiasm of a corpse. “Anchor Light and Little Wick. They live in Canterlot proper, I wrote the address down…”

A clipboard floated up from behind the wheelchair. Candle Light stared forward, her eyes were nothing more than an empty void, no intelligence, no understanding, no joy, no pain. Trixie couldn’t help but wonder if maybe her current state wasn’t easier to deal with, when compared to the reality that Candle Light now had to live in.

“Okay, I see it. Your writing is impressive. I’ll get to contacting her parents right away,” Flow said. “One more question, is there anypony else who should be contacted?”

Everypony shook their heads. They had already told Celestia about this, and that was the only other pony they could think of contacting. After that the mare left along with Candle Light. The group was just left sitting in that quiet room again.

Minuette stood up. “Screw you, Twilight!” She marched toward Twilight who refused to move, or even react to Minuette’s presence. “It’s because you dragged her along that she got hurt. You knew she wasn’t up to the task, you knew she was weaker than the rest of us. Why in Celestia’s name did you force her into this role?”

Twilight looked up with a dead expression. “Because that was my job, my mission.”

Minuette pulled a hoof back, but a teal colored limp wrapped itself around Minuette’s foreleg, stopping her. Lyra stood next to her, with pleading eyes she shook her head slowly. Minuette put her hoof down and walked away, but instead of returning to her chair she went to the door.

“I’m leaving, this whole thing is stupid and I’m going,” Minuette said bitterly. “Trixie, you ain’t any better than Twilight is… See ya.” With that, she walked through the door and disappeared.

Lyra sat down and gently rested a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. Twilight slumped to the side. Lyra smiled, “Come on, Twi. This isn’t so bad… we still have the three of us. We’re a trio of awesome… we can… we…” tears filled her vision. She shook her head violently. “Everything will be okay, right?”

Twilight looked up at her. “No, it won’t. Things will never be the same again. She wasn’t capable enough. She was my acolyte, my apprentice; if she couldn’t handle this, then how can I trust any of you to be able to handle these kinds of situations?”

“I was friends with her, and look at her now,” Twilight replied, flatly. “There is only one pony I can trust anymore.” Twilight pushed herself up onto her hooves and limped forward. She wasn’t physically wounded, but emotionally... “As of now, the group is disbanded.” She limped to the open doorway and walked away. “Good bye.”

Trixie sat there, silent. Lyra cringed and she looked away from everypony. Moondancer stared at her own hooves. Things were silent for the longest time after that, nopony moved, nopony talked, the only sound was Lyra’s soft whimpers.

Trixie looked up at her, and for a moment met her gaze. There was a look in her eyes, at first Trixie couldn’t figure out what it was, or why it made her feel so bad. When she realized what it was, she looked away and trembled. There was disappointment in Moondancer’s eyes.

“You were arguing with Twilight, full well knowing the danger that lurked. If you would have been looking out for those under you, instead of arguing with those above, this wouldn’t have happened,” Moondancer said, her tone was calm as ice. “Twilight is never going to trust anypony with anything ever again because of your failure to actually do something.”

“I know you were, that doesn’t excuse you from slacking on your duties though,” Moondancer said.

Trixie didn’t argue. Lyra stood up and said, “It’s Twilight’s fault too you know.”

Trixie couldn’t take it any longer; she stood and walked to the door. She looked back one last time at Moondancer and said, “It was Twilight’s fault. Not Trixie’s.”

Even as Trixie walked away, she could feel the guilt eating up at her inside. Her mind berated her relentlessly as she tried to decipher Moondancer’s words, their meaning.

I wasn’t good enough to protect her. I could’ve done something, I’m sure of it. I won’t let this happen again, I will become great, I will become powerful, I will become stronger than even Starswirl, than I won’t have to worry about anypony being hurt again.

A weak smile grew on Trixie’s face. The great and Powerful Trixie doesn’t have weakness, the great and powerful Trixie doesn’t have flaws, she is only perfect, so perfect that she can control everything around her.

Fluttershy sat down with her back against the hotel bed post, her face half hidden behind her mane and smiling at Trixie. Trixie lifted the deck of cards and waited a moment, then she pulled out a card and showed it to Fluttershy while asking, “Was this your card?”

Fluttershy’s smile grew and she giggled a little before saying quietly, “Yes, it was.”

Trixie grinned. “Oh, but just wait.” Trixie applied some extra magic into the card. A sudden purple flash occurred, and Trixie watched as Fluttershy’s jaw dropped, and her eyes sparkled. “Do you like it?”

Fluttershy reached out and gently grabbed the card with a hoof and held it gently. “I… but how?”

Trixie shook her head. “A magician never gives away their secrets. Trixie was only waiting for you to notice what had been sitting in front of you this whole time.” Trixie stayed silent to let the sentence sink in.

Fluttershy’s expression slowly changed, her eyes lost their sparkle, and she bit her lip. She looked away. “Oh, you… aren’t talking about the card were you?”

Trixie reached out with a hoof, but Fluttershy flinched away. Trixie pulled her hoof back and looked down at the ground between the two of them. Card’s, roses, and even a very long multi colored scarf lay between them. The past couple of hours had been fun, but it looked like Trixie had just ruined it.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just that, well, you’re so different from me,” Fluttershy said. “I don’t exactly know how… I mean, why are you interested in somepony like me?”

Trixie shook her head. “Trixie doesn’t know the answer to that, yet. But, what she does know,” Trixie looked up at Fluttershy, meeting her gaze, “Is that Trixie really likes you. Trixie would like nothing more than to spend some time getting to know you better…”

Fluttershy smiled, and her cheeks became a rosy shade of red. “I’d like that, but it would be a little weird… wouldn’t it?”

Trixie shook her head again. “Does it have to be weird? No. But will it be perfect? Yes, yes it would be.”

Trixie reached out a second time. This time Fluttershy didn’t pull away as Trixie gently stroked Fluttershy’s cheek. “You can be strong, Fluttershy. Trixie knows this for a fact. You just have to trust that Trixie will be there to back you up. No matter what happens, Trixie will be there for you.”

Trixie beamed. “And that is why The Great and Powerful Trixie will take you under her metaphorical wing and teach you everything you could ever want to know.”

Fluttershy smiled and set the card down. The front of the card held an image of a little blue unicorn, kissing a little yellow pegasus, no numbers, no symbols. Fluttershy leaned in, and Trixie looked into her eyes. For a brief moment the card’s face changed into a two of hearts, before it switch back. Soft gentle lips pressed against Trixie’s cheek.

“I’m going home soon,” Fluttershy whispered into Trixie’s ear. “But I’ll wait for you there, with all of my heart. I’m sure that my friends will love to see your show.”

Trixie wrapped her legs around Fluttershy’s neck and held her tightly. Trixie’s voice became fragile, weak. “You won’t leave me?”

Trixie nodded. “Of course, Trixie would never abandon a friend… especially one that’s so cute.”

Trixie opened her eyes, her entire body shivering cold. She sat up and looked around. Maud was sleeping on the other couch, and she was wrapped up in a thick blanket. Trixie’s own blanket was in a heap on the floor. Slowly Trixie picked up the blanket and wrapped it around herself in an attempt to stay warm.

For the longest time she sat there trying to figure out why Maud was sleeping away from her. It took awhile but she began remembering why she was furious at Maud. And with the dreams she’d been having, the feeling returned.

Maud made me break my promise to Fluttershy. I told her that I would always be there for her, that I’d never leave her. I don’t have to be in a relationship with her to keep her safe.

A nagging little voice reminded Trixie of the torment that Fluttershy had put her through.

But Fluttershy was trying to ruin my life with you, Maud. I just wish there was some way the two of you could become friends. After everything though, I don’t even think it would be safe to leave you in the same room as Fluttershy now. I felt your anger, Maud, your hatred for Fluttershy. I think that if Fluttershy ever did anything to hurt our relationship again, you might just kill her.

Trixie looked at the wall that she had been thrown into once. A painting hung there now, covering up the dent in the wall.

Maud is a little scary sometimes. Her brute strength is beyond her own control, and that causes problems for her that I couldn’t even begin to relate too.

Trixie remembered what happened to the kitchen table that night when Babble had made fun of her.

She hopped off the couch and walked over to Maud. She looked down at the sleeping pony with tired eyes. With a shaky hoof, Trixie reached out and brushed Maud’s mane back. Maud’s hair was longer than it was before Trixie ran away. Maud’s hair had become messy, tangled, and greasy as well.

With enthusiasm Trixie began investigating Maud’s fur. Dark spots were spread through her fur, as well as a few bits in tangled messes. The fur on Maud’s chest was particularly fluffy now, and bits of dried something or another was stuck in it. Trixie leaned into Maud’s neck, and took a timid sniff. Maud didn’t smell so good, though she still held that strong smell of dirt.

Have I been so self centered, that I completely missed the fact that Maud looks terrible? I can’t believe that I didn’t notice this sooner.

Trixie pulled away and looked into Maud’s red streaked eyes. She was crying again. How is it that every time she cries, I’m not there to care for her? Does she just hide it from me? That’s not fair; I want to be able to hold her while she cries sometimes too.

“You look terrible,” Trixie explained. “When’s the last time you took a bath?”

Trixie stamped a hoof into the floor. “Come on, Maud. I’m trying to help you here. When was the last time you took a bath.”

“I didn’t want to forget what you smelled like,” Maud said. “When you were gone… I… I wasn’t sure if I would ever get to smell you again, to hold you.”

Trixie tilted her head to the side. What is that supposed to mean? Why is she talking about the way I smell? That has nothing to do with what I’m asking.

Maud looked away from her. “I only got to hug you before I hurt you and you ran away. But I could still smell you in my fur.”

Trixie’s jaw dropped, and she stared at Maud with a horrified expression. Is she trying to tell me she hasn’t taken a bath in over two weeks?

“That’s it,” Trixie said. “Get up, and follow me. It’s time you took a bath, you… you… silly pony, you.”

Reluctantly Maud got up, and followed behind Trixie. Sure Trixie was exhausted, but she wasn’t going to rest until Maud was sparkling clean. Of course Trixie couldn’t help but sniff at her own fur, and when she did, she realized that Maud’s scent had rubbed off on her. Great, I smell like that too.

A few minutes went by as Trixie ran a bath for the two of them. Maud looked away guiltily as the water filled up, Trixie could understand the feeling. After the tub was full, they got in together. The second Trixie’s body hit the nice hot water, it burned for a second, but then it felt good. She leaned back in the square shaped tub and stretched her legs out.

It occurred to her that this was the first time she’d actually bathed since getting home, it made her feel gross to think about it. She shook her head slowly in disappointment at her own cleanliness.

“I just realized that I haven’t bathed since I got home, I’m gross,” Trixie said.

“You’ve been so depressed that you haven’t noticed how disgusting I was… nopony blames you for not bathing,” Maud said flatly. “I was wondering if somepony would notice that I wasn’t as clean as my dresses were.”

Well it is winter, so I highly doubt that you could be that smelly, but changing your dress everyday to get out of bathing. That’s lazy, like really lazy… and a tad bit smart.

“You are a little gross, but that doesn’t really matter now that we’re in the bath, does it?” Maud shook her head. Trixie smiled. “Good. It is weird though; don’t we usually take at least one bath a day?”

Trixie sunk a little lower into the water. And I haven’t done that with you since we got back. In fact all I did was hurt you… way to go, Trixie, woohoo, you ruin everything.

“Sometimes we make love in the bath tub,” Maud said. “Remember what happened at my sister’s?”

Trixie remembered that well, getting caught mid act was a bit uncomfortable, and a lot more embarrassing, but Trixie surprisingly remembered it fondly. Trixie looked down into the water, between her legs. I wonder if I can do that now?

Trixie focused for a moment, she tried to focus her will into remembering all the romantic things she’d done with Maud. How Maud smelled, her touch, the way she moved, and most deliciously of all, Maud’s tongue. She felt herself growing warmer, and it wasn’t thanks to the water. When Trixie looked up again she saw Maud staring at her.

Trixie’s face burned as she stared at Maud’s muscular, furry form. She scooted over to Maud’s side and smiled. “Yeah, I’m okay.” Trixie leaned in and pressed her lips against Maud’s. Maud didn’t resist, she caved under the weight of Trixie’s kiss. Slowly Trixie climbed on top of Maud’s lap, and stared deeply into those lovely green eyes.

Trixie closed her eyes, leaned in again, and saw Fluttershy underneath her, with a red blushing face, sweat running down her brow and an expression of pure ecstasy. Trixie leapt back, splashing water around the tub. Maud sat there staring at Trixie with wide eyes. Trixie felt her body trembling, and the fire inside died down to an ember. Trixie pulled her legs in and curled into a ball in the corner, and whimpered. She didn’t want to cry in front of Maud again.

“Lulu, it’s okay, you don’t have to force yourself if you’re not ready,” Maud said gently.

Trixie closed her eyes, and saw Fluttershy again. She quickly opened them and said, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I… I just want to be with you, so badly. Why can’t I do this?”

Maud moved over to Trixie’s side and wrapped her legs around Trixie, pulling her into a tight embrace. “You should talk to somepony about this.”

Trixie remembered Fluttershy, and trembled a little harder. “No, I… I don’t want to hurt you again.”

Maud laid her head down on Trixie’s back. “Then you can talk to somepony who knows more about this tomorrow. I think I know somepony who can help you sort through this.”

It took a few minutes, but Trixie finally managed to calm down enough that her body stopped shaking. They quickly finished the bath and went to bed, but to Trixie’s regret she couldn’t sleep next to Maud without seeing Fluttershy. Being forced to sleep on different couches only made Trixie’s heart throb in agony, but she was finally able to get back to sleep. The darkness it seemed was already waiting for her.

Trixie found herself sitting in Fluttershy’s living room, on the hardwood floor with her back against the wall. Her breathing was hard, and her chest hurt, eyes were stinging, but she still looked down at something flat in her hooves. Through the pale light of the moon, she could make out the object being held in her yellow hooves. It was a playing card, a two of hearts, and when she stroked it with a gentle yellow hoof its surface transformed into a picture of a yellow pegasus being kissed by a blue unicorn.

Trixie’s body began moving on its own, but she didn’t feel the need to fight it, instead she just went with the flow. Gently she opened her mouth, her throat was sore, but she began singing anyway. A soft velvet voice that didn’t belong to her came out.

“Do you remember what things to feel like, back when I was just so naïve. Do you know what lies inside of, my broken heart hanging from tattered strings. Oh I used to think we’d be fine, that we could live together in harmony. Then I realized that it was my fault, that you went did all those things.

“Do you remember what I used to mean to you, back when you were young and naïve. Do you know what we could have been together, picking up pieces of shattered self esteem. Oh I used to think that we could live forever, hearts intertwined and completely free. Then I realized that you didn’t love me, not the way that I really need.”

Finally she closed her mouth and whimpered. The card fell from her shaking hoof and hit the floor. “She’s left me,” Trixie said, in a quiet voice that was not her own. “She left me for good this time.”

“Fluttershy,” Pinkie Pie said quietly from the couch. “Are you still awake?”

The way that Trixie moved, and spoke, was more like watching a movie than actually being there. There was also very little in the way of thinking at the moment, it was like her mind was temporarily shut off, and there was a distinct loss of connection to the world around her, she simply didn’t care enough to fight. Something in the back of her mind told her that if she did fight it, that something bad could happen, which only further incentivized her reason for remaining disconnected from everything while watching the events unfold in front of her.

Trixie turned to face her, and saw those bright blue eyes so full of worry. Slowly she moved up halfway onto the couch, and leaned towards Pinkie’s face. Pinkie’s eyes suddenly widened, as Trixie closed her eyes, pushed forward, and her lips made contact with Pinkie’s. She carefully pulled away, and whispered in Fluttershy’s voice, “I’m sorry I woke you, Pinkie.”

“No, I mean, yes, but… we can do more if you want,” Fluttershy replied timidly.

Pinkie’s eyes quickly hardened into a scowl. “I know you're hurt because of what Trixie said to you today. But that doesn’t mean you can use me like this, Fluttershy.”

Fluttershy quickly covered her head with her hooves, her pink mane covered her face. “I’m sorry, I just…”

A gentle hoof brushed through Fluttershy’s mane. “I love you,” Pinkie said quietly, carefully. “But until you’re healed from this gaping wound that Trixie left inside of you, I can’t be with you.”

“But I’m never going to heal, she ripped my heart out and, and, and she killed it,” Fluttershy replied.

“I know, I was there. But that doesn’t mean you won’t heal,” Pinkie Pie said. “And I’m going to be here to help you, every step of the way. When you’re better, we can try this again. I Pinkie Promise.”

Trixie and Maud: Heart of Stone

by TheCrimsonDM

Chapter Ninety: It Pours