The Steeden University of Culinary Arts
By Dee Pad
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Chapter 13: The Way She Crumbles

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"I'm just saying, if the university had a swimming pool, we could extensively test the effects of pastries on the buoyancy of a pony's body."

"And you're perfectly okay with being responsible for people nearly drowning from cramps?"

"Pfft. Like I'd be irresponsible enough to make other people do it. I'd do the tests myself."

Candy rolled her eyes at Pinkie Pie. It seemed like at least once a week, if not more, that Pinkie came up with some cockamamie idea that was completely unfeasible and entirely impractical, yet she seemed to convince herself that they were somehow good ideas and actually believed she could carry them out despite their ludicrousness. Thankfully she had the attention span of a goldfish, so she'd often find something to distract her before she attempted anything stupid, though, more often than not, she'd simply fixate on something else; something less crazy hopefully. Fortunately, they were about to head off for their morning classes, so that would effectively divert her attention.

"Take it from me," Puff chimed in. "Pastries do not make ponies float. I speak from experience."

"Pinkie's also forgetting to take into account Fluttershy's last birthday party," Rainbow Dash added as she lounged on the couch. "She plans a shindig for her at the park, shovels about two dozen of the brownies she made into her gut, then thought it'd be a good idea to go for a dip in the pond. I had to jump in and drag her bloated butt out of there."

"That's because they were chocolate!" Pinkie argued. "Everypony knows chocolate is heavy! Plus, we have to consider the chlorine in a pool as a variable. Who knows what might happen?"

"It doesn't matter!" Candy barked in annoyance, the conversation finally grating on her nerves. "They're not gonna install a pool for your ridiculous experiments."

"We'll see about that!" Pinkie Pie threw on her saddlebags containing her books and marched toward the door.

"To class. I'm gonna bring it up to Gustave, and he can pass the idea on to the higher-ups."

Candy couldn't help but smirk at the thought. "Oh, really? Well, wait up while I go grab my bags from my dorm. I've gotta be there for this."

Puff followed the other mares' lead and picked up her own bags, heading for the door as well while Candy trotted down the hall to her own apartment. As Puff was about to shut the door behind her, Rainbow Dash suddenly jumped up off the couch and chased them down.

Dash fidgeted a bit, like a child asking her mother for candy before dinner. "Hey, you think you can bring me back a little bit of whatever you guys make today? Usually your classmates eat everything before the day's over, so I just want you to put a little somethin' aside for me. Please?"

Pinkie planted her hoof against Rainbow Dash's mouth. It was an odd feeling to her to be on the opposite end of that exchange; usually it was her mouth that was being silenced. But Dash was rambling, and she needed to get to class. "Whatever I bake, I'll bring back an extra big piece for you. Okay?"

Rainbow Dash nodded, keeping her mouth shut to let Pinkie and Puff be on their way. Once they disappeared into the stairwell, the pegasus went back into the dorm.

The hallway wasn't empty for long, however, as the door right across from Pinkie and Puff's apartment creaked open. Sugar Cookie's crimson-coated face peeked out into the hall cautiously. Seeing that nopony was around, she stepped out with her books in tow, prepared to head off to class herself.

Further down the hall, Candy Cane reemerged from her dorm with her books as well. Once she closed the door, she immediately noticed her unicorn neighbor ahead of her.

Sugar Cookie halted in her tracks, silently cursing to herself that she wasn't more attentive. She turned around with a painted smile as Candy hurriedly trotted to catch up to her. "Good morning, Candy," she greeted.

"Hi," Candy responded amicably. "Wow, it feels like we haven't really talked in ages."

That certainly seemed to be her go-to excuse. It's not like Candy hadn't spoken with her at all, but Sugar had been much more distant lately. Until fairly recently, Sugar had been a very sociable individual. Now, she was practically a recluse, rarely being seen outside her dorm except during class, and even then she kept to herself. Candy had noticed in particular that Sugar's smile, that she had come to associate with the mare as if it were her permanent facial expression, was strangely absent, and even when she did smile, like just now, it looked almost disingenuous. Candy had to wonder if perhaps something had happened to her at some point that would cause her to act so differently from what they were used to.

Sugar glanced back at the door to Pinkie's apartment. "Was that Rainbow Dash I heard back there in Pinkie's dorm?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah." Candy thought for a moment. Had Sugar even met Rainbow Dash yet?

"Oh, um... I just thought that maybe... when you all went back home for spring break, that she would not be coming back."

"Oh, that," Candy chuckled. "Yeah, I kinda thought that at first, too, but she's just too stubborn. She absolutely insisted on coming back to Steeden with us. If we said no, she'd probably just fly across the ocean again, so we just gave in and let her stay here. You, uh... haven't mentioned her to anypony, have you? Her being here is still kinda against the rules."

Candy sighed with relief. "Okay, good. Well, I guess we should probably get going, huh? Don't wanna be late."

Sugar nodded in agreement. She looked back at the closed door of Pinkie's apartment once more, then made for the stairwell with Candy.

Pinkie Pie sized up her project, analyzing it from every angle possible. She eyed it with professional scrutiny, searching for any imperfections or spots that needed touching up. She held up her artist's palette, choosing a little more red with her paintbrush to apply it to her work, then stood back to look it over once more. She was relatively pleased with what she saw.

Gustave le Grand peeked over her shoulder, in addition to several other students casting quick glances every now and then, fascinated by the display. On the table was a simple cheesecake, but what was not simple was how Pinkie Pie chose to decorate it; using a paintbrush to apply the various toppings, such as whipped cream, strawberry sauce, and chocolate syrup, all laid out on a wooden palette. He's seen Pinkie Pie do some strange things, but this was definitely in the top five at least.

"I know some people consider cooking and baking to be art, mais I 'ave never seen somepony take zat philosophy quite so literally," Gustave complimented as he studied the finished product. It was evident that Pinkie had attempted to "paint" a picture, but he couldn't for the life of him figure out what it was. "It is un peu sloppy, 'owever. I am unsure of what exactly I am looking at."

"Of course it's sloppy," Pinkie Pie admitted. "Have you ever tried decorating a cake with a paintbrush? It's not as easy as it looks."

It didn't even look that easy, admittedly, Gustave thought. "'Ave you... used zis mezod before?"

"A couple of times. And, I gotta say, I think I'm really improving," Pinkie boasted as she looked proudly upon what she'd created.

Gustave raised an eyebrow before glancing back down at the cheesecake. This was an improvement? "Do you prefer zis mode of decorating zen?"

Pinkie stared at the cake. The longer she looked at it, the closer her proud smile came to an uncertain grimace. She glanced at her paintbrush and palette. "Nah. I think I still like it better the traditional way." She tossed the two items over her shoulder, then set about looking through her work station. "Now, where's my piping bag and rubber spatula?"

With Pinkie now occupied elsewhere, Gustave took the opportunity to cut a slice out of the cheesecake for a taste test. He had to admit, as messy as it looked on the outside, it tasted absolutely divine. The texture, consistency, and, most importantly, the taste itself were exquisite. Yet another example of how baffling it was that somepony as... improbable as Pinkie Pie could be so talented.

Gustave looked over his shoulder to see Candy Cane standing behind him, watching intently as Gustave sampled the cheesecake. The griffon swallowed his bite. "Magnifique." He cut another slice out of it and passed it to Candy. "Try for yourself."

Candy took the plate and grabbed a fork. "Okay." She scooped a little into her mouth. "Mmm... That's tasty stuff."

Gustave thought for a moment, a question coming to his mind. "Mademoiselle Pie works at a bakery back in Equestria, oui?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah, she does. I actually got to visit during spring break. It's a nice place. The owners are just as good at baking as Pinkie."

Gustave nodded. He was well aware of the quality of their work, though he hadn't gotten the opportunity to actually meet them, regrettably. "And she is comfortable working zere? She enjoys working in a small, family-owned bakery?"

Candy raised an eyebrow at all the questions. Was he trying to get at something in particular? "Based on what I saw, yeah, she does. Actually, from what she's told me, even if—or rather, when—she graduates, she plans on going right back to Ponyville to keep working there. I think she just wants her diploma just for the sake of having it."

Candy stared at Gustave skeptically, but didn't say anything. Was something going on? Did he perhaps know something about Pinkie that her friends didn't? Was she actually in danger of possibly failing the course? How could that be? Despite how unorthodox she and her methods were, Pinkie was by and large one of the most talented students at the whole school. How could she be in danger of failing? Perhaps she should just ask for clarification.

Before Candy could finish her question, the class bell rang, signaling that the day's classes had come to an end.

Gustave addressed the class. "Well zen, everyone clean your stations. We are done for zee day."

The griffon didn't waste much time exiting the room, leaving the students to tidy up any mess they've made. Once everyone was nearly finished, Puff Pastry approached Pinkie Pie.

"Sure," Pinkie acknowledged as she washed out a bowl she'd used for cake mix. "Oh, hey, does anyone want some of the cake I made?" she asked, addressing the whole class. Accepting her generous offer, several of the other students cut themselves a slice of Pinkie's cheesecake. In the rush, she was sure to get a piece for herself; she did make a promise to somepony.

Candy Cane finished cleaning up and made for the door. When she stepped out into the hall, she immediately noticed that Gustave was standing there. He didn't appear to be doing anything other than idly glancing out the window. He did turn back to look when Candy walked out, but said nothing, only returning his gaze to the gardens outside the window. He seemed to be waiting for something.

Candy reentered the kitchen, quickly trotting over to Pinkie Pie, who had just finished cleaning up and was about to leave. "Pinkie, I need to talk to you."

Pinkie grabbed the slice of cake she'd set aside and walked towards the door, but was stopped in her tracks when Candy grabbed her tail. Pinkie turned back with a look of confusion.

"Trouble? Why would I be in trouble?" She looked back to her station, but saw nothing out of place. "I cleaned up. I should be fine."

"No, I think it's something else. Gustave said something to me that seemed... off. And I don't want to make assumptions, but I think he's waiting for you out in the hall."

Pinkie scratched her chin. "Huh, that's weird. I don't think I've done anything too outlandish lately. And I've been doing pretty well on my work. Maybe it's not bad. Ooo, maybe he wants to tell me how great I've been doing! Maybe he thinks I can be class valedictorian!"

Candy frowned slightly. "Based on the way he was talking, I don't think that's it."

Candy wanted to say something reassuring, but found herself at a loss for words. "I guess you don't really have a choice. Just remember: I got your back."

Pinkie nodded with a grin. With that, the two of them exited into the hallway. Sure enough, Gustave was still standing there, and upon seeing Pinkie Pie, he turned away from the window fully, confirming Candy's suspicion.

Gustave stared at the piece of cake that Pinkie was holding, noting to himself that this was not the first time he'd seen her bringing leftovers back to her apartment. "Mademoiselle Pie, may I 'ave un moment, s'il vous plaît?" he asked, his expression unreadable. He glanced at Candy, then back to Pinkie. "In private."

"Oh, okay." Pinkie cast an unsure look at Candy. Apparently she wouldn't have her back as expected. Candy simply gave a look that said "be careful" before heading on her way back to her dorm. "So should we go somewhere in particular, or what?"

An alarm suddenly went off in Pinkie's brain. "M-My dorm?" she gulped. "Umm... I, uh... I can't think of any reason why not." Gustave was about to head off, but was stopped when Pinkie grabbed his leg. "Wait." She stared up at the ceiling desperately before sighing in defeat. "Nope, can't think of anything."

The griffon wrenched his claw from Pinkie's grip and the two of them made their way upstairs to Pinkie's dorm.

The trek through the halls may as well have been the equivalent of walking the green mile. Pinkie was doing her damnedest to not start sweating bullets. What was she going to do? If she let Gustave into her apartment, he'd find Rainbow Dash, and then they'd both be in some seriously hot water. Whatever it was he wanted to talk to her about couldn't possibly be worse than discovering that she'd been harboring another pony for a couple of months, especially when the final stretch of her course was just on the horizon. She needed to think of something, and fast.

Pinkie had barely noticed that they'd already arrived at the top of the stairs and were mere seconds away from reaching her dorm. She prepared to reach out for the doorknob, her movements quite obviously trepidant. She pulled her hoof back, positioning herself between Gustave and the door, much to the griffon's annoyance. "So!" Pinkie chirped, a nervous crack in her voice that belied her forcibly cheery grin. "What, uh... What did you wanna talk to me about, Chef?"

Gustave rolled his eyes slightly. "Could we per'aps wait until we are inside before discussing zis?" he responded, gesturing toward the door.

"Alllllright-y then. It would certainly be an honor to host the great Gustave le Grand in my apartment!" Pinkie said loudly, leaning slightly towards the door.

Gustave raised an eyebrow at the mare. Her smile clearly didn't look genuine, and the beads of sweat rolling down her forehead were definitely cause for suspicion. "Mademoiselle Pie, you seem très nerveux. Zere wouldn't be anyzing in your dormitory zat you wouldn't want me to see, is zere?"

"What?!" Pinkie bellowed much louder than she intended. "Don't be silly, heh heh. Of course I have nothing to hide! When I open this door, I'm sure you'll find that there is nothing out of the ordinary! At all!"

"Well zen..." Once again, Gustave gestured to the door, his agitation visibly rising.

"Ooookay." Pinkie turned back to the door, her nervousness rising with each passing second. "Here we go. I'm reaching for the doorknob. My hoof is now on the doorknob. I am turning the doorknob. And in a moment, I'll open the door and we'll be going inside. Me and Chef le—"

Fed up with Pinkie's stalling, Gustave pushed the door open himself. Pinkie's iron grip on the knob forced her to jerk forward with it until she fell to the floor, barely able to keep the slice of cheesecake from joining her. The griffon stepped over the prone mare to enter, glancing around as if looking for something. Once Pinkie returned to her hooves, she, too, poked around discreetly in search of Rainbow Dash. She breathed a silent sigh of relief when she saw no sign of her. She must have caught on to Pinkie's less-than-subtle warning.

Wiping the sweat from her forehead, Pinkie dropped the cake off in the fridge and looked to Gustave with a smile that was actually sincere this time. "So what did you wanna talk about, Chef? Is there some problem we need to address?"

The griffon still had a skeptical look in his eye, his gaze trained toward the open bedroom door. "Un moment."

Gustave casually sauntered to the bedroom. Although the room, like the rest of the apartment, was empty at first glance, his gaze fell to the floor at the foot of Pinkie's bed. Pinkie peered in from the doorway curiously. The chef leaned down, grabbed the bed sheet, pulled it up, and peered underneath. Staring back at Gustave with a shaky grin were a pair of magenta eyes under a short, chromatic mane. Pinkie's hoof smacked audibly against her face.

"Oh, uh, hey there," Rainbow Dash said with a nervous chuckle. "Fancy meeting you here, Gustave. Long time no see."

With a disappointed shake of his head, Gustave returned to the dorm's living room, gesturing for Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash to follow. The pegasus crawled out from under the bed with her ears folded back, disappointed in herself for failing her best friend.

"Under the bed?" Pinkie said in a hushed, but aggravated, tone as they went to join Gustave for their talking to. "You have wings! Why didn't you just go out the window?"

"I panicked, okay. I had to think fast." Dash breathed a defeated sigh. "I'm sorry, Pinkie."

The earth pony placed her hoof on her friend's shoulder, showing no hard feelings.

"Now zen," Gustave began when the two ashamed ponies stood before him with their heads down, "I would like an explanation."

"Look, Gustave," Rainbow Dash interrupted Pinkie. "Don't blame Pinkie for this. I kinda forced myself into this situation. I didn't give her much choice. I flew here myself, no supplies, no money, and had no way to get back home safely. Pinkie let me stay here because she didn't want something to happen to me."

Gustave stroked his mustache, not seeming at all surprised with Rainbow Dash's defense of her friend. "I am aware of zee situation. To be truzful, I 'ave been made aware of your presence by anozer student some weeks ago, before spring break even."

The two ponies widened their eyes with surprise. "You did?" Pinkie gawked. "But then why did you wait until now to say something?"

"Because I assumed you would do zee right zing and bring your friend 'ome when you left for your break. No 'arm, no foul. 'Owever, I am disappointed to see zat she 'as returned wiz you, and I am disappointed zat you would disregard zee rules of zis school so blatantly."

Pinkie's ears folded back, ashamed and not knowing what she could say to defend herself.

Again, Gustave stroked his mustache, staying silent for a moment. He was not one who enjoyed seeing good talent go to waste, but under normal circumstances, such a transgression would be punishable by expulsion. Although, there was another option, though he suspected it wasn't the one they wanted to hear. "Zee way I see it, you 'ave two options, Miss Pie: eizer you accept responsibility for breaking zee rules and your education at zis establishment comes to its end—which I assume you do not want..."

"Don't kick her out! She's worked too hard to let it end like this! I don't want to be the one responsible for ruining this for her!" Rainbow Dash begged desperately.

Dash shrunk back. How many times had she heard that now? She was really starting to wish she had thought about it.

Pinkie and Dash lifted their eyes from the floor, looking at Gustave with a slight glimmer of hope.

"Seeing as Miss Dash's presence 'as not been made known to zee rest of zee faculty, and she 'as caused no issues as far as I am aware, I am willing to let zis ordeal slide..."

And Pinkie's grin immediately fell once more. Everything she went through to keep Rainbow Dash's presence a secret had finally come back to bite her. Given the situation, this course of action was the least severe, certainly, but that didn't make it sting any less.

Pinkie felt Dash's hoof on her shoulder. Turning to her friend, she saw a soft smile on the pegasus's face.

"It's not a big deal, Pinkie. I have a return ticket now, right? I can just catch a ride back home. Besides, there's not that much time left in your course. I'm sure I can wait for you this time."

Pinkie managed to return her smile. "I guess you're right. I mean, we still got to spend a lot of time together. You got to see a foreign country, make some new friends..."

"And be here for you during such an important part of your life. That's enough for me."

The pair embraced in a hug, knowing that they had little time left in each others company until Pinkie returned home.

"You made zee right decision, Pinkie Pie," Gustave said with a nod. "I wish you 'ad made it sooner, but I suppose zis will do."

The conversation was interrupted when the door opened, Puff entering the apartment while browsing a hoofful of envelopes.

"Hey, Pinkie, you have something here from—" The pig-tailed mare cut herself off when she finally looked up to see Gustave standing in front of her. Her eyes then glanced past him to Rainbow Dash, the combined image of the two of them together suddenly stirring up a little concern. "Oh, um... W-Who is this? I... I don't believe vee've met," Puff said with a shaky smile, attempting to deny any involvement with the pegasus.

Gustave raised an eyebrow. "She was aware of Miss Dash's presence as well? Hm. I suppose it would be déraisonnable to assume zat you could keep zis a secret from your roommate. Is zere anypony else zat may be in on zis little fonctionnement may'aps?" he asked Pinkie with a stern glower.

Pinkie Pie hesitated to respond, a reaction which, in and of itself, was all the evidence Gustave needed. She was in trouble as it was; it was probably for the best to just be truthful. "Candy knows, too. And... Gwen."

He wasn't surprised to hear of Candy's involvement, but what he was surprised to hear was that his own daughter knew of this as well. "Gwenivere? Vraiment? I wonder why she would not mention information like zis to moi?"

"Because Gwen likes Rainbow Dash," Pinkie clarified. "She wanted her to stick around. Don't be mad at her. She actually made a friend. You can't punish her for that."

Gustave was starting to have mixed feelings about this whole situation. Of course, this was a violation of the university's rules, and to learn that not one but four of his students would willingly involve themselves was both disappointing and aggravating. However, as he said, Rainbow Dash's presence hasn't actually caused any immediately noticeable problems. Would it be wise—ethical even—to let such a transgression slide? But the two Ponyville mares already seemed to be at peace with their decision to send Rainbow Dash home, so he decided to just keep his beak shut so as not to compromise himself as well. He didn't want to sully his reputation with the school by ignoring this violation.

"I suppose zee 'igher-ups at zee university do not need to know about zis, so long as Rainbow Dash returns 'ome soon," Gustave said. "I will be 'aving a little chat wiz Gwenivere about zis regardless. I won't punish 'er as 'er teacher, but most certainly will punish 'er as 'er fazer."

"So that's it? Rainbow Dash is leaving?" Puff said, some sadness in her voice. Her eyes met with the pegasus's. "Vell then... I'll miss you. It vas fun to have you around vhile it lasted." Puff laid their mail on the coffee table to offer to hug Rainbow Dash, which she was happy to see her accept.

"Yeah, I'll miss you, too, Puff. But, hey, after you graduate, make a trip to Ponyville sometime so we can hang out."

Gustave's golden eyes idly fell upon the envelopes that Puff had laid aside, one in particular catching his attention. It was a white envelope with gold and purple trim, and a wax seal with an ornate imprint. "Is zat... zee royal seal on zat letter?"

"Hm?" Puff looked down at the envelope in question. "Oh, ya. It's for Pinkie from Twilight."

Gustave nodded in realization, stroking his chin as he remembered. "Ah, oui. I often forget zat Mademoiselle Sparkle—or razer, Princess Sparkle—was not yet royalty when I first met 'er. And zat she is a close friend of zee two of you as well." He took notice that, despite being the topic the conversation had turned to, Pinkie Pie had not yet picked up the letter. "Well? Aren't you going to open it?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Well, not right now. I've kinda got other things on my mind," Pinkie answered, passing a saddened look to Rainbow Dash.

Gustave shook his head as if to reprimand Pinkie for her decision. "Non non, zat will not do. Zis is a letter from royalty. You cannot simply ignore it."

"It's just Twilight," Rainbow Dash argued, eliciting a shocked look from Gustave at her disrespect. "She's not sending a letter as a princess, she's sending it as a friend. It's not royal business or anything."

Pinkie finally picked up the letter. She looked over the fancy design of the envelope with a quizzical gaze. "Actually, she's never sent a letter in an envelope like this before."

Pinkie stared at the pegasus. "Have you met Twilight? Maybe I should introduce you sometime. She has the most complex organizational system ever. She would never just use whatever envelope was just lying around. She has different envelopes for mailing within Ponyville and out of Ponyville. Heck, she has different envelopes for just mailing to the north and south sides of Ponyville."

"So basically what you're saying is that this letter is royal business?" Dash inferred.

Finally, Pinkie Pie tore the letter open. While normally Gustave would have been on his way, not wanting to invade his students privacy, he was far too curious as to what sort of royal decree Princess Twilight had sent.

The pink mare removed the letter, unfolded it, and quickly skimmed the topic sentence. She tilted her head slightly in confusion. "Huh. It's addressed to you." She passed the letter to Rainbow Dash.

Gustave was more than a little surprised to hear that, and, admittedly, somewhat displeased. "Zut alors. Even zee princess knows of zis? Is zere no end to zis charade?"

"What's it say, Dashie?" Pinkie asked curiously, leaning closer to look at the paper.

I know we discussed this at length while you were home, but I can't stop worrying that your presence in Steeden may cause issues for Pinkie Pie. That's not to say that I don't trust you, I just know how stubborn and reckless you can be. Again, I am not going to ask you to return home, but I suppose the least I can ask is for you to behave yourself.

That being said, I have taken it upon myself to make some arrangements. Even though Gustave and the rest of the university's staff have given you the okay to stay there..."

Rainbow Dash paused, she and Pinkie Pie looking up slowly at Gustave. The griffon certainly looked none too pleased.

"Maybe a little," Pinkie admitted. "But it was only to make our friends stop worrying."

Even though Gustave and the rest of the university's staff have given you the okay to stay there, I personally think you are being a burden on Pinkie, as well as Puff Pastry. Therefore, after doing some research, I have included a formal request with this letter that I want you to deliver to a hotel near the university (the address is included). The request should allow you to stay at the hotel for the remainder of your time in Trotholm, at my expense. You should count yourself lucky that you're friends with a princess. I'm not going to make a habit of using my status to bail you out of trouble.

With that said, I hope you two enjoy the rest of your time in Steeden. Give my regards to Pinkie Pie.

Once Rainbow Dash had finished reading out the letter, Puff blinked, her face decorated with surprise. "Vell... That's convenient. Talk about good timing."

"That's Twilight for ya," Pinkie said, her voice suddenly very cheery and her smile as wide as the horizon. "That pony is the very definition of punctual."

"Indeed," Gustave agreed with a twirl of his mustache. "Zat was very fortuitous timing. I suppose zis is one of zose instances zat you would describe as a 'coinkey-dink,' n'est-ce pas?"

"Oui, I suppose it does," Gustave confirmed with a slight nod. "And zere are no rules against students 'aving visitors during zee day. Just make sure zat you aren't around après nightfall and zere should be no problems. Now zen..." Gustave headed towards the door. "I will take my leave. Enjoy zee rest of your day, Mademoiselles."

"You, too! Bye, Chef!" Pinkie bid with a wave goodbye as the griffon left the apartment.

But the moment the door closed behind Gustave, it opened again, this time Candy Cane entering, her expression fraught with concern. "So? What happened?"

"Basically, I don't have to go home, but from now on I'm gonna be staying at a hotel," Rainbow Dash explained.

"Oh, okay." Candy breathed a sigh of relief. "I've been pacing back and forth in my dorm for the past ten minutes worrying about you two. Uh, you didn't tell him that I was involved in all this, did you?"

"I had to," Pinkie admitted with a touch of guilt. "I was afraid of getting in even deeper doodoo if I kept lying to him."

"Oh. Well, that's understandable, I guess. You don't think I'm gonna get in trouble now though, do you?"

"I don't think so," Puff answered. "Seemed like it didn't really bother him too much vunce vee read Twilight's letter."

"Speaking of people who knew about this..." Pinkie segued. "Chef le Grand said that one of the other students told him about Rainbow Dash. That's how he found out."

"That's not really surprising," Candy said with a roll of her eyes. "It's her own fault for wandering around all haphazard."

"No way!" Dash disagreed. "Nopony suspected a thing. I had everypony fooled. And I know Gwen wouldn't rat me out."

"But it was just us that knew, right?" Pinkie said. "I mean, nopony told anypony else, did they?"

The other three mares stared at the worried look on her face. "What's wrong?" Dash inquired.

Candy, hanging her head slightly in regret, pointed in the general direction of the individual in question. "Sugar Cookie."

"What? You mean that chick living across the hall?" Rainbow Dash asked. Candy nodded to confirm. "I've never even met her! What reason would she have to tattle on me? I thought she was friends with you guys."

"She is!" Candy attempted to defend. "Although, she has been acting pretty oddly for a while. Come to think of it, she starting acting weird around the time you showed up, Dash."

The pegasus quirked an eyebrow in vexation. "Seriously? Like I said, I've never met her. What could she have against me?"

"Well, I know one way we can find out." With a furrowed brow, Rainbow Dash stomped toward the door.

Alarms went off in Pinkie Pie's head. "No, wait! I don't know if that's—" Unfortunately, her warning went unheeded, with Rainbow Dash disappearing behind the door.

Fortunately, it wasn't far to march to get where she was going. Rainbow Dash had basically started pounding on the door before she had even come to a stop. She couldn't believe that somepony who claimed to be Pinkie's friend would willing try to get her sent back home, and worse, possibly get Pinkie expelled. The pegasus wanted answers, and she wanted them now.

The door finally opened, a crimson-coated unicorn peeking out. She appeared taken aback to see Rainbow Dash.

Sugar looked past the pegasus, noticing that Puff and Candy were watching from across the hall. They seemed equally curious about the question. It was pretty evident that she'd been found out. With a defeated sigh, Sugar stepped out into the hallway to confront Rainbow Dash, closing the door behind her.

"I know, and I am sorry," Sugar apologized, a slight hint of remorse in her tone. She then turned back to Rainbow Dash with a furrowed brow. "But you are not supposed to be here. I was simply doing my duty as a student and reporting a violation. And if you were to stay here, you would no doubt cause trouble for Pinkie Pie."

"But then why would you bother making that promise?" Candy inquired, her voice sounding increasingly upset.

Sugar hesitated to answer, biting her lip. "Well... I do not know why I did it."

"I have a hard time believing that," Rainbow Dash insisted, leaning closer to intimidate her.

Sugar glared back at the pegasus. "The fact of the matter is that you do not belong here. Why I did what I did is not important, but it was the right thing to do. And Pinkie Pie will be better off when you return home."

"See that?" Rainbow said, pointing to the letter. "Whatever the real reason is you want me to leave, it means nothing. I don't even know why Pinkie wanted to be your friend in the first place."

Pinkie Pie shoved her way past Candy and Puff and tried to pull Rainbow Dash away from Sugar. "That's enough, Rainbow Dash. Just let it go before you say something you'll regret. Please?"

Dash jerked her leg out of Pinkie's grasp. "Are you kidding? Don't protect her. She tried to get you kicked out! You should be mad at her, too!"

Sugar watched as Pinkie gently grabbed the pegasus's hoof, trying to coax her back into the apartment. The unicorn narrowed her eyes.

Dash looked into Pinkie's eyes. It wasn't often she saw her looking this upset. Either this whole situation was harder on her than Dash first thought, or something else was bothering her. She let out a sigh. "Alright, fine. No point wasting my energy on her when things turned out okay anyway."

A sly smirk played across Sugar's lips. "It is just as well; I do not want to associate with somepony with drinking problems anyway."

Rainbow Dash halted in her tracks, peering back at Sugar with a raised eyebrow. "What? Drinking problem? What are talking about?"

Candy and Puff seemed just as confused as the pegasus. Pinkie, however, was mortified.

Sugar wore a triumphant grin. "What? Did she not tell you about the night we all went out for Candy's birthday?"

Rainbow Dash seemed to recall hearing something like that when she first arrived. "Well, yeah. But, come on, she doesn't have a drinking problem. That was her first time drinking."

"Perhaps. But I think it is a problem when alcohol makes somepony act as sleazy as she did."

Candy, Puff, and especially Pinkie Pie were aghast at her accusation. Rainbow Dash, however, narrowed her eyes, her tone becoming icy and venomous.

"I am just describing it as it happened. She got drunk, and I brought her back home to put her to bed, but she suggested that we 'hang out' at my place for a little while. It did not take long for her to start flirting rather aggressively. Do not get me wrong, I am flattered, but I am just not into sluts."

Rainbow Dash grit her teeth, letting out a low growl. Without warning, and to the shock of her friends, the pegasus aggressively leapt at the crimson unicorn, tackling her to the ground with a rage-fueled grunt. Sugar let out a frightened shriek as Dash pinned her to the carpeted floor of the hallway, pressing her hooves down on the Steedish mare's forelegs and straddling her to prevent her from moving. Pinkie, Candy, and Puff were rendered speechless by Dash's actions, almost too shocked to move and do anything to intervene.

"Don't you dare talk about her like that!" Dash bellowed, an intense fire burning in her eyes. "Take it back!"

Rainbow Dash's yelling may as well have been the snarling of a blood-thristy monster, as Sugar was far too terrified by the beams of hot anger shooting down upon her. All the unicorn could do was cower helplessly.

Dash stomped a hoof violently on the floor just an inch from Sugar's head. "I said take it back! Now!"

With one hoof now free, Sugar did the first thing that her fight or flight instincts instructed. Her hoof shot up, connecting firmly—and audibly—with her attacker's jaw, eliciting pained gasps from the three onlookers. The impact of the punch caused Rainbow Dash to stagger backward and off of Sugar, allowing the prone mare to shakily rise to her hooves once more. The unicorn stared at Dash, who was still reeling from the unexpected blow and having turned her back to her. Sugar was still slightly in shock, unsure what she had even just done.

Rainbow Dash rubbed her jaw, then leered over her shoulder at her offender. But before she could retaliate, her eyes widened a bit. She rolled her tongue around in her mouth for a moment, then lifted her hoof, spitting onto it. A small portion of her cyan hoof was stained red with a splotch of blood, and in that small pool of blood and saliva was one of Rainbow Dash's teeth.

Sugar's pupils shrank in terror at the realization of what she'd done. And that fear only escalated further when Dash's gaze turned back on her with a rage so intense she thought she was staring into the very gates of Tartarus, but she was too frightened to move. Dash bared her teeth and growled furiously, a growl that quickly built to a snarl, then a scream of pure rage as once more she leapt forward. Sugar's only reaction was to cover her face with her hooves and brace herself for whatever harm was about to befall her.

However, instead of the pain she had been expecting, she heard a loud thud. Removing her hooves from her face, she saw Rainbow Dash on the floor struggling to get up, that incensed fury still alive in her magenta eyes. But she was kept pinned to the floor by a pink pony with her legs wrapped around the pegasus's waist.

"Stop it, Rainbow Dash!" Pinkie pleaded, fighting to hold her furious friend down.

"No! You have to stop!" Pinkie flipped Dash onto her back, straddling her much like the pegasus had done to Sugar moments before. "You're not gonna solve anything acting like this! Just please stop before you do something you'll regret!"

Candy took the opportunity to cast a judgmental glare at Sugar. "If I were you, I'd run while you have the chance."

Not needing to be told a second time, Sugar bolted back into her dorm, slamming the door and locking it behind her.

Now that Sugar was out of harm's way, Pinkie let up on Rainbow Dash, allowing her to wriggle free. The pegasus let out an aggravated snort through her nostrils. "Augh! Why'd you do that, Pinkie?! I was just about to—ah!" She lifted a hoof to her jaw again. Now that her adrenaline was winding down, the pain in her gums came in full force, accompanied by a small trickle of blood dripping from the corner of her mouth.

Concerned, Pinkie led Dash to her dorm. "Come on. We should get something for that."

Reluctantly, Rainbow Dash conceded, the pain in her mouth too difficult to ignore. Candy and Puff simply stood back, letting the pair go inside without them.

Candy made a gesture to Puff with her hoof. "Let's head over to my place for a while. I have a feeling those two are going to need some time alone."

Pinkie Pie stood at the kitchen sink, running some cold water over a washcloth. Satisfied that it was sufficiently damp, she shut off the water, wrung out the cloth, and returned to the living room. She passed the wet cloth to Rainbow Dash, who was sitting on the couch with a rather sour expression.

Dash did as she was told and chomped down on the washcloth, letting it soak up the blood from her wound. "Fanksh," she mumbled, still a touch miffed about what had happened.

Pinkie Pie hopped up onto the couch next to her. She was still a little shocked about the way Rainbow Dash had acted back there. Perhaps even more disconcerting was why Sugar Cookie would outright lie like that.

The pink mare figured as much. Dash was tough. She could take pretty much any amount of punishment and give just as much if need be, which is exactly what she tried to do, unfortunately. As upset as she was about what Sugar had said about her, she wasn't about to let Dash hurt her. She couldn't condone that sort of thing.

"Um... Just to clarify, all that stuff Sugar Cookie said about me wasn't true," Pinkie explained. "Yes, I got a little tipsy... Okay, really tipsy, but she came on to me."

Dash glanced at Pinkie through the corner of her eye. "Yeah, I know. You'd never do somefing like 'at. You're better 'n fat. But I washn't about to shtand by and let her talk crap about you."

"I appreciate that you're willing to stand up for me like that, but I'd rather you didn't do it so aggressively." Pinkie lowered her gaze to the floor. "I just can't believe she would say something like that."

"Shorry." Tired of her speech being slurred, Rainbow Dash removed the cloth from her mouth, only seeing a small blood stain. Looked like the bleeding had slowed down enough not to need it anymore anyway. "Why are you friends with her anyway? What kind of friend talks like that about their friends?"

"She was nice enough when we met. I sorta assumed she came on to me because we were both drunk at the time, but I guess that doesn't explain why she would be so mean now."

Rainbow Dash leaned back against the couch with a small, cocky smirk. "Whatever. I doubt she'll do it again after this anyway. I might not have gotten to give her what she deserved, but I definitely put a scare into her."

"Huh?" Dash was caught off guard by the question. "Whadda ya talkin' about? I was sticking up for you. Why else?"

"You don't have to try and hurt somepony to stick up for me. In fact, I'd prefer if you didn't. You've defended me before, but never like that." Pinkie's ears folded back and she turned away from her friend. "I... I didn't like seeing you do that. It was... kinda scary."

Rainbow Dash frowned. She didn't like hearing that, but she couldn't help it. When Sugar said what she said, Dash just snapped. It was the first reaction that came to mind.

"There's something else going on with you, Dashie," Pinkie inferred, gazing into the pegasus's eyes with deep concern. "You've never acted like that before. What's going on?"

Dash stared back into Pinkie's bright blue irises, attempting to formulate some sort of explanation for her actions. But the longer she stared, the more obvious the truth became. There was only one reason she could think of why she would react in such an extreme manner.

The pegasus turned her eyes downward, shuffling her hooves awkwardly. "I... I think I like you."

Pinkie Pie tilted her head in confusion. "Well, I like you, too, Rainbow Dash, but that's not really any reason to—"

Pinkie just sat in silence as she allowed that to sink in. Had she not understood yet, the deepening blush on her dear friend's face might have tipped her off. "Oh," was all she could say in response.

The apartment was quickly filled with a thick, awkward silence, neither mare looking at the other. It was Pinkie Pie who decided to pop that bubble and speak after a minute or so.

Rainbow Dash shrugged. "I don't know. A long time probably. I just don't think I realized just how much I cared about you until you left. It was like... a part of me was missing without you. Those kinds of feelings can make a person do crazy things."

Dash nodded with a sigh. "Yeah... And I guess Sugar was the last straw." She looked Pinkie in the eye once more, this time with passionate determination. "I'll never let anypony treat you like that. Ever. You didn't do anything to deserve that."

Amidst the awkward atmosphere centered around the whole conversation, Pinkie Pie finally managed a smile. "Thank you. I appreciate that."

The silence hit again, neither of them knowing where to take the topic from here. Rainbow Dash felt like she'd just been humiliated in public. Her face was burning red, and the silence wasn't helping matters. She never handled mushy stuff like this very well. It was embarrassing for somepony who normally puts up a tough front to be so open with her feelings, especially to this extent. Although, she still hadn't really gotten Pinkie's thoughts on the matter. It's not like things could be any more awkward anyway.

"Uhh..." Dash started nervously, speaking slowly. "So... I don't suppose there's any chance that you might, you know... feel the same way about me, is there?"

Pinkie frowned slightly, looking at Dash with a touch of remorse. "Sorry. I'm not... I don't..."

Rainbow Dash lifted her hoof to stop Pinkie, nodding knowingly. "Yeah, yeah... I figured. I guess I already knew the answer to that. Just... thought I'd ask."

Pinkie could see the disappointment in Rainbow Dash's expression. She definitely felt bad that she couldn't reciprocate Dash's feelings, but what was she supposed to do? She liked Rainbow Dash, just not in that way. Which begged the question...

"Because of this!" Dash exclaimed, pointing out the weird tension in the room. "I knew you wouldn't—or couldn't—feel the same way. So if I had told you how I felt, it would have made things awkward between us. And look where we are now. You can't tell me this isn't awkward knowing that your best friend has a... a crush on you." Dash's cheeks reddened again, having accidentally worded it in a way that made her sound like a hormonal teenager.

She was right; Pinkie couldn't deny that. She did feel a little weird. But that didn't necessarily mean their relationship had to change. Did it?

"Well, there's no reason we can't still be friends or anything. You'll always be my best friend, Dashie, and nothing's gonna change that. We can get past this."

"Maybe you can," Dash argued, feeling increasingly frustrated by her own emotions. "I'm the one who's got these feelings to deal with. I've never felt this way about somepony before. I don't know how long it'll take to get over it, or if I'll get over it at all."

Pinkie let out a silent sigh. It seemed like no matter what she said, she couldn't convince Rainbow Dash that everything could just go back to normal. So if words weren't going to do the trick, then she would just have to rely on the old adage of actions speaking louder than words.

Rainbow Dash felt a pair of hooves wrap around her shoulders. Pinkie Pie softly hugged her friend, resting her head against Dash's neck. "What are you doing?"

The cyan mare rolled her eyes and groaned. "A hug is not going to magically fix this, Pinkie."

"Maybe not a normal hug. But this is a best-friends-forever-never-forget-it-as-long-as-we-live hug. It doesn't matter how you feel, we'll always be besties, no matter what. Plus, nopony's ever told me that they had a crush on me before. It's flattering really. Huh. Now that I think about it, that's two people who've been attracted to me since I came to Steeden. Maybe this country's just naturally more romantic or something."

Pinkie Pie had obviously gotten past the awkwardness of the scenario, evidenced by the fact that her thoughts were beginning to go off on a tangent. And Rainbow Dash had to concede that she had now found herself smiling again. That must have been a good sign. Dash placed her hoof gently on top of one of Pinkie's, not because of her feelings toward her, but to let her friend know that things were going to be okay between them.

Pinkie finally released Rainbow Dash from her hug, taking up her previous position on the couch, the difference now was that they were both smiling at one another. But then Pinkie gave Dash a coy look, confusing the pegasus slightly.

Rainbow Dash found her blush returning. She desperately hoped that this information was not something Pinkie was intending to take advantage of for her own devices. "Y-Yeah, I guess..."

The pink pony leaned closer, bouncing her eyebrows at the pegasus. "So, uh... What is it about me that you like so much?"

Dash tried to inch away slightly, but found that Pinkie matched every shuffle she made. She pensively turned her eyes up, trying to find the least incriminating answer. "Well, uh... We just have so much fun when we're together. I just like being around you."

Pinkie pulled back, returning Rainbow's personal space to her. The earth pony pouted, a little disappointed by that answer. "Oh. Well, that's nice to hear. I like spending time with you, too, Dashie. But, I mean, there's gotta be something about me that you like besides my personality, right? Do I have any outstanding features?"

Dash cast a glance at Pinkie, her embarrassed blush still in full force. She looked Pinkie over as she thought. It's not something she'd put much thought into admittedly. But the more she stared at Pinkie, the more she realized that Pinkie really was an attractive mare. At least to her. She couldn't speak for anypony else.

Dash tilted her head as she scrounged up the right words. "I guess if I was trying to be romantic, I'd say your eyes."

"Yeah. They're just always so bright and... full of optimism. It's hard to stare into your eyes without smiling." Rainbow Dash surprised herself with how well she had managed to say that without feeling embarrassed or stammering awkwardly.

"Aw, thank you," Pinkie said with a grateful grin, a blush of her own forming. "But what about if you weren't being romantic?"

Dash chuckled at the question. She was a teeny, tiny bit ashamed of herself for already knowing the answer to that, but figured she could play it off as a joke. "If I were being a little more shallow, then I guess I'd say your butt."

Dash shrugged. "Yeah. You have a nice butt. What, is there something wrong with that?"

Pinkie hummed to herself, unsure how to feel. "So, like, you think it's big? Or small? Or what?"

"I have a bubble butt?! Seriously?" Pinkie got up off of the couch, hurrying to the bathroom in order to find a mirror to determine it for herself.

Dash leaned over the back of the couch, laughing at Pinkie's reaction. "Come on, it's cute. There's nothing wrong with having a bubble butt!" She sat back down, letting her mirth settle for a moment. "Now I feel better. I think we can get past this just fine."

The Steeden University of Culinary Arts

by Dee Pad

Chapter 13 - The Way She Crumbles