//------------------------------// // Chapter 5 // Story: Luna vs. a Tiny Italian Car // by totallynotabrony //------------------------------// August 9, 2015 “We must rescue my sister!” I crossed the room. “I’m going to call the cops. Surely they know how to call someone in Philadelphia who can do something.” I picked the phone up, but Luna slapped it back down with magic. “The police must not be involved. We must do this ourselves.” “Why?” I demanded. “A disturbance like this in the middle of diplomatic negotiations could spell disaster,” Luna warned. “If we can handle this quietly, then we will.” “But Tirek,” I said. “That kind of shoots down quiet. How did he even get here?” Luna stuttered. “I-I do not know. With four princesses away from Equestria, he may have pressed some unknown advantage. How he managed to capture Celestia or what he plans to do, I do not know. But we must stop him.” “How? If he has Celestia’s power, you can’t match him.” Luna gave me a look and - Princess of the Moon or not - it felt like I was staring at the sun from a distance of about six inches. “Do not tell me what I cannot do. What do you know of it?” “I’m just saying that I would be a whole lot more comfortable with tanks and machine guns going after Tirek. I know you want to help Celestia, but the last time you fought him you weren't sure you could beat him with all the princesses.” “We still have time,” Luna insisted. “There is no magic here on Earth for him to grow stronger by absorbing. And I am no weakling. Do not forget that one thousand years ago, Celestia required the Elements of Harmony to defeat Nightmare Moon.” “And you aren’t Nightmare Moon,” I pointed out. “You’re concerned about Celestia, and trying to prevent Tirek from harming anyone else. That puts you on the defensive, and what happens if you can’t defeat him? Does he take Earth? Does he absorb your power and return to Equestria to claim it too?” Luna’s teeth were clenched, but she wasn’t trying to burn a hole in my face anymore. “But we cannot do nothing!” “So let me call the freaking army.” Luna hesitated, and then asked, “How long does it take to travel to Philadelphia?” “From Baltimore? I don’t know, an hour or two?” “Then Sandy, please trust me. We must go. If I can handle the situation, I will. If not, well, we may end up needing an army anyway.” “Jesus,” I muttered and glanced at Maria. She shook her head. “If that’s really Tirek, if Celestia is really in danger, we need to get them help now, not an hour from now. For all we know, whoever saw them might have already called the cops. I agree with Sandy, this isn’t a job for us.” Luna looked at the floor. “Then call.” I picked up the phone again and dialed 911. “Hello, I need to report, uh…” Well, what was I supposed to say? I went with “...someone in danger.” “Where is this?” asked the operator. “Philadelphia.” They paused, then asked, “How do you know they are in danger?” “I saw it on the internet.” “Where did you see this?” “It was a comment on my blog. There was a link to where people were talking about it on Twitter.” “Who is in danger?” “Princess Celestia, you know, one of the ponies who came to our world the other day? One of the baddest evil villains from their world showed up here and-” “Sir, is this a serious call?” “Yes! This is absolutely serious!” “I’m going to transfer you to Philadelphia police.” There was a click and a few rings. The next operator picked up. “Hello, I need to report something. Princess Celestia, one of the ponies that just appeared in our world, was kidnapped by Tirek, a villain from Equestria-” “Sir, do you know the penalty for filing a false police report?” “It’s not false!” “Do you have evidence that what you say is true?” “I saw it on my blog.” “Do you have credible evidence?” I dropped my cellphone in shock when I’d seen the headline. I hadn’t had the chance to read anything further. “Please, just look into this. Princess Celestia has been kidnapped by Tirek and is in Philadelphia.” “Look kid, you are by far not the first person to call about ponies today. And you know what? None of those stories have played out. Don’t call again.” The call disconnected. “Do they not believe you?” Luna asked as I stared at the dead phone. “They thought it was a prank call.” “The police will not help?” Luna’s breathing started to take off again. “Well, they did make a really good point,” I said. “All I know is one headline I saw. Maybe I was the one being pranked.” “Celestia is not here,” Luna snapped. “Regardless of where she is or whether Tirek has indeed kidnapped her, she may be in trouble and I must find her!” “Well, let’s go back to our room and I’ll search the internet with my computer.” Her glare returned. “Oh, now that you aren't so sure that my sister has been kidnapped by a dangerous monster you’re willing to help?” “It’s not like that…” “You are a fair-weather friend,” she declared. “I will be going to look for Celestia myself.” “Hey wait, we can at least tell you were to start!” I stepped forward but she shoved me with a wing. With a look, she said, “You’ve already refused to help.” Ducking her head, she rushed out of the room before I could say anything else. Maria and I traded a glance. “Well, with a guilt trip like that, I guess we can’t stop now,” she observed. “Yeah, but I don’t think Luna does subtle,” I said. “She’s probably going to go to Philadelphia now.” Maria was already headed for the door. “Let’s work fast.” We ran back to the room and I grabbed my laptop while Maria stuffed clothes in suitcases. Within two minutes, I had what I needed, and it wasn’t what I wanted to see. There were no pictures, but enough people had reported seeing Celestia accompanying another quadrupedal creature. Some that hadn’t seen them still reported seeing strange lights or flashes. I ran off a rough location on a scrap of hotel paper and threw the laptop into a bag. We had our stuff downstairs to the car and our keys back to the front desk in a matter of minutes. Despite our rush, the hour was already late and it was nearly eleven p.m. by the time we were rolling. Pulling to the exit of the parking garage, I looked right and left. “Where do you think she went?” “Maybe try the convention center?” Maria suggested. I didn’t have a better idea. We headed that direction. A group of bronies were still hanging around, despite closing ceremonies having concluded the convention hours earlier. I rolled down the window and shouted, “Did anyone see Luna a few minutes ago?” A British voice replied, “She went that way!” I’d heard all kinds of accents around the convention. Lovely that so many people from all walks of life could come together over a common interest. But that wasn’t important right now. I followed the indicated direction and drove down the street. Luna was in front of the Ripley’s Believe it or Not! in the plaza, consulting a large marble globe in a fountain. I threw the car into park at the curb and ran towards her. Maria thoughtfully put on the hazard lights. Luna looked up as I arrived. She was still glaring, I noticed. It didn’t help that the globe didn’t have any cities listed. “We want to help,” I said. She looked at me. I didn’t try to hide my heaving breaths. “You will take me to Philadelphia?” “Right.” Luna held her poise for a moment longer and then bolted for the car, me right behind her. Unfortunately, when she got there, getting in wasn’t so simple. Maria tried to help, but getting the passenger seat slid far enough forward to enable an alicorn to get into the back seat was a difficult proposition, particularly since said pony had no idea how to sit in a car. But we were all in a hurry and pulled away from the curb with Luna still thrashing in the back seat. She told us to, in fact. The rough address I had figured went into an old Garmin Maria programmed. With my phone out of action, it was all we had for navigation. Maria didn’t believe in smartphones, and I was starting to wish I had bought her one for Christmas anyway. The paper atlas on the dashboard could help, but couldn’t pick out specific neighborhoods of a city. We followed the small glowing screen of the GPS as it led us out of town. “How fast are we going?” Luna grunted. “As fast as I dare,” I said, white-knuckled at the wheel. The wheels hammered over the road, which in downtown Baltimore, was worse than can be described with words. Swinging onto the interstate, the ride improved. I still had to cut through traffic, but at least they were going most of our speed. Luna had managed to get her head between the front seats and stared ahead. The taillights in front and the headlights of the opposing lanes seemed to mesmerize her for a moment. Realizing we had a ways to go, she composed herself. “I want to thank you for doing this.” I wanted to say something poetic in reply. Some quip that would make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal and that we hadn’t been terrible people a little earlier in the night. Maria beat me to it. “Someone had to.” “I would have done it alone,” Luna said, apparently reading too much into it. Maria had the good sense to drop it. I really didn’t need an argument when I was trying to concentrate on simultaneously speeding like the devil and not getting us caught or killed. From the place in Baltimore where we started to the place in Philadelphia where we ended up, it was a little less than one hundred miles. We made the trip in a little more than an hour. I was sweating and shaking by the time we got there. It took a second to get my knuckles to unclench from the steering wheel. While we still didn’t know where Celestia and Tirek were, we were close. I saw a blue glow in the mirror. Luna raised her head, eyes closed and magic working. She tapped me on the shoulder with a hoof. “Take the next street.” I made the turn. “How far are we?” “I am not too sure. The direction is steady, however.” We drove a few more blocks and Luna had me turn again. In the passenger seat, Maria had her pistol uncocked but in her hand. My eyes were twitching back and forth, prying the shadows for any detail. “We’re close,” Luna breathed, suspense thick in her voice. We took another corner. Bright lights up ahead illuminated a building with a huge staircase out front. I blinked. “Is that-” There was a flash and a pillar of red light flew from the top of the stairs towards the heavens. Luna jerked and pawed at the window. I saw two four-legged figures zoom skyward in the light, and then it - and they - were gone. “That was them…” Luna whimpered. “Where did they go?” “I...I don’t know.”