//------------------------------// // The gift of socks by Knight of Lycaeus // Story: Dark Paradise 2: The Twiluna prompt tag collab // by Majora //------------------------------// Luna snuggled up closely to Twilight and sighed contently, “What a wonderful way for us to spend our anniversary together. Peaceful, quiet, relaxing, and certainly no press hounds to deal with.”   Twilight giggled as she leaned in closer, “I’m glad you enjoyed it. It took some time, but it was well worth it in the end for both of us.”   Luna smiled brightly and brought out a finely wrapped gift, “I do have one more surprise for thee.”   Twilight smiled as she took the gift, “You didn’t have to. Spending time was enough.”   Luna smiled and nudged Twilight. Twilight responded back with an affectionate muzzle before she opened the gift carefully. Lifting up the lid…..   “A tuna fish?” Twilight asked as the fish flopped its way out of the box and fell to the floor with a resounding splat.   “What?” Luna exclaimed. “This is not what I inten-“   “Surprise!” a masculine voice boomed as Discord appeared with a grand flourish. He was decked from horn to tail in a tailored suit complete with top hat. The giveaway of his rather creative outlook was the patterns and colours his suit was splattered in. Stripes, dots, and a myriad of colours gave his outfit a rather strong glare. The sequin on every available space only added to his dazzling figure.   “Discord!” Both Alicorns yelled.   “What?” Discord said as he pulled out a comically long staff with a dazed bird sitting sideways. “Your original gift was boring, dull. I spiced it up!”   “But a fish?” Twilight exclaimed.   The fish in question was no longer a tuna, but was a rainbow salmon. It literally was as it says a salmon in an ever changing rainbow of colours.   “What? Don’t Alicorns and Pegasi enjoy fish?” Discord commented as he began twirling his staff while the bird held on for dear life.   “Where is the gift I bought Twilight?” Luna asked angrily.   “Oh that,” Discord said nonchalantly as he reclined back while his staff caught on fire and the bird having found a new perch on the hat, “follow the fish.”   The fish now a tuna coloured like speckled trout flipped and flopped before leaping out the window. No splat was heard only a massive hole where it had landed.   Both Alicorns sighed and facehoofed at Discord’s over-the-top antics. They had wanted a quiet day, now to find the gift they had to jump down a rabbit hole so to speak.   The first trip down the rabbit hole landed them in the typical broad forest clearing.   Anyway, there was a large statue before them while Ponies in purple and blue danced and chanted around it. The statue was of a comically large horse with massive wings, long as can be horn, and a figure so muscular it was unreal in every sense.   The fish was dancing on the long horn and both Alicorns took wing to grab it. Well they tried; it can be rather difficult to fly while everypony on the ground decides to make a grab for you all while shouting “Our Saviour's Have Come!”   They grabbed onto the fish to land on hard metal. This new world to Twilight and Luna seemed too impossible to believe, machinery leaps and bounds ahead of their own zip and soared overhead, underhoof, and all around really.   The robotic fish flew overhead amid the bustle of the crowd. Both Alicorns looked at each other; while it would not be good to spread the knowledge of magic to this world of technology they needed that fish.   So began a merry chase of teleporting and swimming as they attempted to hurl through the crowds of ships and other flying things. Along the way they managed to start a few new cults dedicated to their wondrous magic and the majesty of the Alicorn form among other things.   Finally their magic managed to each grab half of the fish and they were off down another hole.   They fell out of the hole going up towards the sky, if there was a sky. The place itself wasn't big, but it housed a building and its very obnoxious sign. The giant first letters dwarfed the letters that came after that all Twilight could see was BBBB. Luna was the first to stand although she nearly collapsed again soon after.   "Luna what's wrong?" Twilight asked in concern.   Luna merely pointed to the chalkboard sitting on the restaurant's wall.   TODAY'S SPECIAL: HORSE MEAT ON A BUN Yes the Meat Does Contain Horse   Twilight blanched at the sign and moved to back away, with Luna doing the same. They both stopped when they hit a soft wall of air. Looking up they saw the fish which had ballooned to Giant Grinning Bluefin Tuna Float and with a loud bang they disappeared. The next was a quick visit, there was a Pony. The Pony had a cat or rather half a cat. The cat held a struggling striped tuna fish. The Pony and cat did not blink as the fish was stolen away in a loud bang as they went off again. Another short visit, though not as quick. Before them was a machine stuffing Pony-like things into tin cans quicker than any Pony at home could do by hoof. It was basically a needle in a haystack or rather a fish in a sea of Ponies. The found can smirked at them before enlarging and engulfing the stunned Alicorns. Before them was a blue circle and an orange circle, beneath them were metal sheets and over them were lasers and other assorted deathtraps. Both circles were marked with the fish.   "Which way?" Twilight asked.   Luna shook her head, "I do not know."   Twilight walked up to the blue and looked trying to see what laid ahead. Beyond the blue was a village much like Ponyville although everyone was singing and dancing no matter what they did.   While Twilight looked into a very musical world, Luna peered into the orange. Beyond the orange was a village not entirely unlike Ponyville. The homes were arranged in neat rows and everyone looked pleasant though some smiles seemed a bit strained.   Twilight sighed and asked, "Musical or forced utopia?"   Luna shuddered, "Neither would be preferable. But at least with the musical, we may be able to keep our heads. I dare not try the other world."   They walked through the blue just as the fish flopped out on the steps of orange. After quite some time which involved wheeling, rhyming, and much singing all around; really more singing than one ever did even in musicals. They came to the conclusion the fish was not here and after two very over-the-top numbers they came back to the portals.   "Orange?" asked a tired Twilight.   "Orange," Luna agreed.   The utopia was as bad as both feared, with bright smiles all around and not a frown to be found. Every family was the same, one partner who worked and another who did not. Two foals for each, a colt and a filly; with tiny cottage home for all on neat tidy streets.   Oh, and one tapping dancing fish that sang, no, actually it belted out show tunes.   The next world was not the best, For everyone rhymed without rest.   Yet it was not the worst, Bad were the rhymes done in burst.   Groups of rhymers drove one mad, No it did not make the Alicorns glad.   Happy they were when they left, Before the speech made them deaf. The pair landed in another forest clearing and without warning, a horse with a boy clad in green thundered past. The boy looked back as though to apologize yet not a sound came from his mouth. Hanging on the horse was a fish-shaped charm that was grinning broadly at the confused Alicorns who gave chase to another fleeing fish. There were close before the horse and boy disappeared around the corner. This short trip was no longer short and it would take time before they found the boy, the horse, and the mad fish at a castle. Sneaking in past the ineffective guards, they grabbed the charm and with a loud raspberry noise they left again.   The fleshy feel of their landing was not reassuring nor was the darkness surrounding them. The flesh was also a greenish colour which only added to the unsettling feeling. Hidden among the thick green flesh was the shimmering tuna who looked smug at its escape. Twilight prepared to move before a hoof stopped her. Luna motioned for Twilight to look. The flesh they were standing on were tentacles, hundreds of them all in the same greenish colour. They were attached to a face, a massive one at that. Carefully, the two moved towards the smug fish taking great care not to awaken whatever this was. The fish then squaked loudly to awaken the great beast. Before it awoke, however, they made a final desperate dash for the fish who was unhappy at its capture. Onto the next world where thankfully for them looked very much like the home they knew. Although there was the curious case of glass tanks on everypony’s back and the thin tubes that ran from the tanks into their mouths and bodies.   Nope this world was not home, but it seemed some mad corporation dominated this world for each tank proclaimed one of its many brands of sweet and sugary drinks.   One rather undead looking Pony was hooked into some brown liquid labelled Dr. Pepper. In the tank was the elusive fish, now a polka-dotted tuna toy.   “Follow that Pony,” Twilight said as she led the way through the crowd. Though by design or sugar, probably sugar all the Ponies seemed to zip on by forcing both of them to teleport again to chase after the fish.   “Why have we not tried to teleport the fish towards us?” Luna yelled as they kept pace with the fleeing fish.   Twilight blinked and turned her teleport spell to the fish and poof the fish appeared in their hooves before a vacuum sucked them up to somewhere new. Somewhere new it was, the lands were grey and red. That was more or less all the colours with only a few splashes of black to break up the monotony. Again it looked like Equestria although it was one where it seemed like a few guests came, made a mess, and never left afterwards. How rude.   One of the major revealers looked to be a floating mask in colours of red, purple, and yellow. Around it were other figures with horns, fangs, and spikes galore.   Swimming in a bowl of blood red punch was the tuna now turned silver.   Luna shook her head, “Let’s grab this fish and leave.”   Twilight nodded, “Levitate it from the bowl, I rather not know what the punch is made of.”   They lifted the fish over and as it drew near it and leapt from their magical grip and smacked both Alicorns on the head and off they went again.   With a deep sigh Twilight flopped onto the bench of the restaurant the mad fish had taken them to. Luna had also collapsed next to her. Sadly the chaotic fish was nowhere to be found. A thud alerted both of them to something being placed on the table though neither had ordered. The two identical drinks looked sane, though it was all relative after their adventures through time and space. Nestled at the bottom was half a fish token.   Attempts to pour out the drink were pointless as it stuck to the glass, same with lifting out the token.   "Together?" Twilight asked.   Luna nodded, "Agreed."   Both of them took the fizzing drink in their magic and drank.   Twilight winced, "Feels…. like I got hit in the head with a slice of lemon,"   "….wrapped around a gold brick," Luna continued as she massaged her head with a hoof.   The token halves now free of the drink merrily bounced out with solid clinks until they merged forming a small yellow, leech-like fish which split again into two. These tiny fish flew straight into the ears of the two Alicorns and with a loud poof they were gone again. Across the restaurant was a robot named Marvin who was normally depressed. Seeing Ponies that talked walk into the place was different, though not so much so. There was an air of cheer from the exhausted visitors and he couldn’t help but feel slightly less depressed than usual. There was a cliff with a rather sheer drop. Thankfully the teleport dumped them on the cliff and not over it. A colourful blanket was laid out with a plain white box with the image of a grinning tuna fish stamped on top.   "This is rather peaceful for one of Discord's preferred antics," Luna commented wearily as they stepped over to the box and blanket.   Twilight laid out on top of the blanket, "I know we should be careful, but…."   Luna laid down to Twilight and sighed, "This is somewhat like how our day was earlier. Calm and peaceful until-"   "We followed the fish-shaped chaos of a mad trickster through however many worlds or time or both to find a lost gift."   "Perhaps we have found it?" Luna asked.   Twilight sighed as she opened up the box, "I hope so."   Inside the box was a pair of socks and not the rather commonly found sheer sort, but warm ones knitted from wool.   Twilight was about to comment about how much she liked the gift before the socks opened wide and began to sing.   "Oh I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts!"