//------------------------------// // The Fluffle // Story: A Not-So-Subtle Romance // by sherbetsix //------------------------------// “Back! Back you monsters! This is my notebook, and I’m gonna keep it!” Twilight clutched her notebook to her chest with both hooves, using her magic to grasp a broom and swat at several approaching white rabbits. The rabbits twitched their noses, bouncing back from the attack. Their beady, red and black eyes were wide, and they looked around the room as they sniffed. The few that Twilight had driven away instead bounded towards the kitchen. Saliva dripped and glistened on their large front teeth. The kitchen floor was littered with empty boxes, scattered silverware, and broken dishes. Many bunnies had taken to chewing on the boxes, splitting the cardboard into pieces. Bunnies hopped on the counters, opening the cupboards and pressing their noses into every corner and crevice, which were long-since devoid of any food. A few were idling in the sink, which they had filled with cool water, treading in place or diving below the surface. “I’ve never – pant – used The Stare this many times in a row,” Fluttershy said. She was in the middle of the living room, bodily protecting her own couch and other furniture from the animals, Staring clusters of them into submission and ordering them to behave. However, each time she used her animal-taming powers, it seemed like more rabbits would join the fray and overwhelm her. They had already torn one seat cushion to shreds, and were eying the rest. “I just can’t … can’t bring myself to yell at the cute little bunnies. Tell Angel, I still love him…” She closed her eyes and began to fall backwards. Twilight charged her horn, preparing to catch her, but flinched and stopped when something zoomed in through a window. There, in front of the couch, Pinkie Pie stood with Fluttershy lying splayed across her back, a triumphant grin across her muzzle. “Hiya Twilight! I got a flinchy leg, a floppy ear, and a twisting tail, so I knew to come right away!” Pinkie’s explanation included replicating her ‘flinchy leg,’ which tipped Fluttershy over onto the couch, her head supported by a pillow that Pinkie slid into place. The rabbits in the cottage ceased their onslaught, looking at Pinkie and chattering with each other. Fluttershy opened a bleary eye. “P… Pinkie? You saved me…” “I was about to catch you but Pinkie just showed up out of nowhere,” Twilight said, rolling her eyes. She lit her horn again, levitating away a group of rabbits that were attempting to creep up from her blind spot. Fluttershy continued, “The bunnies ate everything… I can’t… please… save us, Pinkie…” Twilight raised a single eyebrow while she listened to Fluttershy’s breathless voice. On the other hoof, Pinkie jumped up from Fluttershy’s side, saying, “Sure can do, Fluttershy! Pinkie Pie’s gonna make everything OK!” She spun around to a particularly large chair by the wall, grabbed its seat cushion and raised it above her head. With a grunt, she tore it in half. “I always thought that chair was a little uncomfortable…” Twilight said. Pellets of animal food rained down onto the floor of the cottage out of the two halves of the seat cushion, which Pinkie held aloft. Pinkie skipped towards the door, leaving a trail of pellets in her wake. “There’s plenty more where that came from, wascally wabbits~” she said in a sing-song voice, “Follow me!” At the sight of food, the animals came flooding out of the kitchen and the corners of the cottage, snatching up the pellets and trailing behind the pink mare and out the door. Twilight caught her breath in the sudden stillness, then stood up and looked out the window in the front of the cottage. Her eyes bulged. In the middle of Fluttershy’s front yard, an elegant and massive salad lay arrayed in a pile about ten hoof-lengths tall. Large leaves of lettuce were covered with plump orange slices, and a tiny red cherry was perched on the very top. Bunnies dove head-first into the dish, gnawing on the leaves and biting off sections of fruit. The whole display became a writhing mass of white, green, and orange. Further away across the stream, a few light-colored mares were visible, bouquets of flowers peeking out of their saddlebags. The mares had evidently caught sight of the rampage, as their jaws dropped and they fell as one, screaming, onto the ground. One of them whispered, “The horror…,” to the open skies, her legs twitching. Twilight shook her head and walked over to Fluttershy, who was now sitting up and smiling. “You all right, Fluttershy?” Twilight placed a hoof on her head. “I’m feeling much better, thanks.” Fluttershy slid off the couch onto all fours, and trotted over to meet Pinkie, who was passing back through the doorway. The rabbits were slowing down in their eating frenzy outside. “Oh, thank you thank you, Pinkie! How did you do that?” She reached out and grabbed Pinkie Pie in a gentle hug, which Pinkie returned with greater intensity. “I keep salads stashed all around town in case of salad-based emergencies. For this one, it was a doozy, so I combined a few salads into one! How did you get yourself in such a pickle, you silly filly?” Pinkie extended a hoof and flicked Fluttershy’s nose. The yellow Pegasus squeaked quietly and withdrew, hiding her face behind her mane. “I feel like it’s all my fault,” Twilight said. The other two looked over to her. “I was the one who left the door open. I guess the rabbits assumed it was an invitation for supper.” “No no, it was Angel’s fault. I’m sure he told them they could eat whatever they want, like it’s his house and not mine. I’ll have to give him a stern talking-to later,” Fluttershy said. She turned to Pinkie. “Angel invited his family over for a family reunion. It’s normally a lot of fun, but not when they get so – rowdy.” “That’s neat! I didn’t know bunnies even had family reunions. Huh – do you think they throw parties, too? Do all animals… like to party…?” Pinkie’s speech slowed as she spoke. Her eyes widened and slid out of focus, and her mouth hung open. A small bit of drool leaked onto her chin. “Pinkie! Equestria to Pinkie!” Twilight walked towards the pony and clopped her hooves together, but she didn’t respond. A moment later, a small white bunny scampered into the cottage and threw its body around one of Pinkie’s front legs. Pinkie started and looked around, noticing the creature. “Oh hi, Angel! Did you like the salad?” Angel chattered for a few seconds, hopped back onto the ground, and gave the mare two thumbs up. Then he nuzzled her hoof, and hopped back out the door. The trio saw Angel and the rest of the rabbits hurry off into the trees near Fluttershy’s cottage, leaving a few salad leaves stacked on the ground like some sort of memento. “Wow, I’ve hardly ever seen him do that with another pony,” Fluttershy said. Pinkie Pie cocked her head and made a high-pitched noise. “I guess I can be friends with everyone in town, not just ponies! This is great!” “I’m glad, his attitude seems to be improving,” Fluttershy said. “Um, Pinkie, would you like to stay for a little while? I’ll make us all some tea, it’s the least I can do to thank you. First, I suppose I should clean the kitchen a little.” Her ears flopped against her head as she surveyed the clutter. Pinkie and Twilight offered to help, and, with some trepidation, the mares walked into the kitchen. They spent some time picking up cardboard boxes and cleaning soiled silverware. Once the kitchen was in working order, Fluttershy set a kettle on the oven to boil, then beat her wings and rose to the top of one of the cabinets, grabbing a box of teabags, coffee grounds, some sugar, and a bowl of cookies. Before long, two steaming cups of tea were in front of Pinkie and Fluttershy, while Twilight had a cup of coffee in front of her. “What were you two talking about before all the fracas got started?” Pinkie asked, grabbing several cookies out of the bowl and munching on them. “Oh, we were just talking about the past. I was wondering what it was like in flight academy and in Ponyville before I got here,” Twilight said. “It sure wasn’t as super-exciting,” Pinkie said, taking a swig of her tea. “I mean, we’ve saved the world how many times? We even have stained-glass portraits of us in the royal castle now!” “And the five of us were friends, but not nearly as close as we are now,” Fluttershy added, “It’s because you brought us all together.” This earned a smile from Twilight. Fluttershy continued, “Oh, and I never finished answering your question about Rainbow Dash.” She took a long sip of tea. “All I can remember are those colts that she used to date in the academy, and a long-distance thing with a stallion in Cloudsdale. But that didn’t last too long, only a few months, just like the other ones. I can’t think of anything more recent.” “That’s it? No trysts with other mares or anything?” Twilight asked. Pinkie stopped slurping her tea and looked over at Twilight with something like a sly grin, but remained silent. Twilight’s eyes flicked toward Pinkie for just a moment. She gulped some coffee and started nibbling small pieces off the corner of a cookie. “No, nothing like that,” Fluttershy replied in a matter-of-fact tone. “Although, it wouldn’t surprise me if it happened now.” Pinkie swiveled her head towards the pegasus. “It wouldn’t?” Fluttershy blushed lightly. “Well, I mean, she can come off as a little harsh, but under the surface she really does have a romantic side. It’s no wonder she wants to get back into the dating scene. And yes, I happen to know that she finds both stallions – and mares – attractive.” “She’s not the only one~” Pinkie said, looking at Fluttershy, who hid her face behind her cup of tea and her hooves. Twilight looked between the other two mares, rubbing her jaw with a hoof. “Huh. Did something happen between you and Rain-” Fluttershy cleared her throat. “Nope! Nothing at all.” She set down her cup and grinned. “Is it hot in here? It’s hot in here. I’ll go open up a window…” She turned to walk out of the kitchen. “Uh, I think the windows were already open, if I remember correctly,” Twilight said, but the mare had left. Twilight turned to Pinkie Pie, who was chuckling and finishing her tea at the same time, thus making a strange gargling sound. “I hope I didn’t upset her.” Pinkie swallowed. “I don’t think so, she’s just being Fluttershy. It’ll be fine, just you wait.” Soon after Pinkie finished talking, Fluttershy walked back into the kitchen. “I’m sorry Twilight.” She let out a breath. “I wasn’t entirely honest before. Rainbow and I did have a thing for a while, back in flight school. It was just a silly filly crush I had on her, and she was nice enough to go out with me.” “I’m sure she also liked you back!” Pinkie said, “Otherwise why would she have snogged you so much and stuff?” Fluttershy blushed again. “Yes, well, there was that, yes.” Twilight clopped her hooves together. “That’s so wonderful! I had no idea that two of my best friends had been marefriends before! This is an important part of life that I’ve never much talked about with you girls before!” Pinkie nodded. “Yeah Twilight, you can talk with us about anything, you know!” Pinkie’s sentence reminded Twilight of something. I never did make it over to the boutique today… She resolved to make it up to Rarity sometime. “I know that, Pinkie. I’m lucky to have such good friends.” She took one last drink and levitated her empty mug over to the sink. Later that night, Twilight waited at the train station platform, carrying only a small bag. The streetlamps had just come on, though the scene was still lit by fading sunlight. Soon, a mid-size passenger train came into view, puffing out clouds of steam, slowly approaching the station. It eventually stopped, and a conductor shouted the name of the town while ringing a bell. The doors slid open, and several ponies walked out in a line, followed by a small purple dragon covered in green spines, wearing a backpack. Twilight hurried over towards the dragon, sweeping him up bodily in a hug. “Spike! I missed you!” “Yeah I missed you too, Twilight,” Spike said in his boyish voice. He returned the embrace for a moment. “Uh, you should put me down though, ponies are staring,” Twilight glanced around, not noticing anypony looking their way. “Sorry,” she said, placing the dragon back on the platform. “No biggie,” Spike said, waving a claw. “Boy have I got a lot to tell you! Yesterday, I asked Celestia if I could have a break from all the tutoring, and she said yes! So I was walking through the castle courtyard, and, um.” He paused, sniffing the air. “What’s in the bag, Twilight?” Twilight stifled a giggle. “Oh, maybe a little something I picked up as a reward for being such a good assistant,” she said in an indifferent tone. “Maybe you’d like a little peek?” She folded down the corner of the bag, revealing several large glittering gemstones inside. One was a rounded white stone, lined with grains of red. “Is that… a fire opal?” Spike said, staring into the bag with his mouth open. Twilight slapped the bag closed. “Yes! You can have that one as a bedtime snack once we get back to the castle.” She started walking, slowly, towards the platform exit. “Sweet Celestia, a fire opal. Please, can’t I have just a taste now?” Spike dragged his claws down the sides of his head. “No, if you have a taste you’ll want more and I don’t want you to make a mess in public,” Twilight answered, shaking her head. “C’mon Twilight, just a lick?” He flicked a forked tongue into the air and waved it around, but Twilight just shook her head again. Spike ran in front of Twilight, grabbing onto one of her hooves and urging her forward. “Then let’s go home! Faster!” Twilight snickered, and picked up her pace to a canter, levitating Spike onto her back. They made their way off the platform and through the center of the city, Twilight’s hoof beats echoing in the emptying streets. At one point, she thought she heard Spike saying ‘Mush! Mush!’ behind her head, but when she turned around, the dragon was only chuckling. Twilight lit her horn and swung open the doors to her castle, galloping inside and sliding to a stop. The reception area was lit by a few firefly lanterns, which gave the furniture and the walls a murky yellow sheen. “Are we here already…?” Spike asked in a tired voice. Twilight plucked the dragon off her back with her magic and set him down on a rug. The dragon’s eyes were drooping, and he took off his backpack, clutching it in his claws. “Are you falling asleep so quickly? Well, I suppose I can just tuck this fire opal away for your breakfast tomorrow,” Twilight said, continuing on into the castle. Spike jolted up, and rushed forward to meet her. “No, I was only resting my eyes for a bit! C’mon, I hardly had anything to eat on the train!” With a flash of lavender light, the stone in question materialized in Spike’s outstretched claws. “All right! Wow, the marbling is just perfect.” He stroked the surface of the stone with a claw, following the glittering lines of red. He shoved half of the large stone into his mouth, chawing it in half with a flourish of his tongue. After munching for a few seconds, he swallowed and licked each claw on his free hand. The other half of the stone met a similar, mercifully quick fate. Spike patted his belly and sighed. “Maybe you should take a bit more time to enjoy your food, don’t you think?” Twilight said. She had stopped mid-step to watch the dragon, now turning to walk around a corner in the hallway. “Us dragons know that the best part of eating is doing it fast! That’s when it tastes the best!” “Ya know, you might have something there,” Twilight said, nodding. The pair entered the bedroom, and Spike headed over to one side where a somewhat smaller version of Twilight’s bed stood by itself, covered in sheets that had pictures of ferocious dragons printed on them. He set down his backpack and turned towards the wall, breathing in and belching forth a stream of green flame. The flame struck a small torch bolted onto the castle wall, which lit and bathed half of the room in a gentle emerald glow. The dragon pulled himself into bed underneath the covers. Twilight sighed, “Now it looks like home. Sleep tight, Spike.” “Ugh, sappy. ’Night, Twilight,” he replied, and rolled over onto his side. After making sure Spike was comfortable, Twilight grabbed a saddlebag, made her way to the front of the castle and slipped outside, silently closing the doors behind herself. The sun had completely vanished by now, replaced by Luna’s starry sky and a waxing moon on the horizon. The few ponies remaining in the streets seemed to be heading home. Following the light of the streetlamps, Twilight walked towards the center of the city until she reached a row of shops lit from within by lamp light, in contrast with the surrounding dark buildings. One of the shops had a sign above it which read, ‘Madame J’s Books’. The storefront was pink and decorated as if at random by painted hearts. She paused at the doorway for a moment, then pulled the door open and stepped inside. A soft jingling sound followed Twilight into the shop, which was much larger than it had appeared from the outside. A narrow walkway led straight from the door to a counter dominated by a large cash register and also cluttered with stacks of books. Bookshelves towered on both sides of the walkway, extending further into the shop in either direction. To her left, signs hung suspended from the ceiling over groups of bookcases, with labels like ‘Nonfiction’ and ‘Suspense’ or ‘Cooking’. Most of these books had spines that were blue or grey, and were packed tightly together in the shelves. To the right, only one large sign hung from the ceiling, spinning slowly, which had the word ‘Romance’ written on it in a showy font. The books in these bookshelves were colored pink or red, and were generally much thinner than the others. And in the very back of the right half of the shop, a small sign on the wall labelled the section as ‘Adults Only’. An older unicorn mare with a faded pink mane and light purple coat walked up to Twilight. “Princess Twilight Sparkle! Good evening.” She bowed to the alicorn, briefly. “Thank you for visiting my shop. You’re in luck, I was about to close up, just waiting on another customer. But I’m in no hurry.” “Oh, thanks, Madame J,” Twilight replied. “I won’t take long. And there’s no need to call me ‘Princess’.” “Very well, Twilight. Is there anything I can help you find?” “I just wanted to browse a bit.” Twilight scratched at her neck with a hoof. “By myself.” She winced. Madame J waved a hoof in a placating gesture. “Not to worry, I understand completely. I’ll be over here if you need me, take your time.” The mare turned and walked towards one of the stacks of books perched on the counter. Twilight glanced around again, and slid between two bookshelves marking the entrance to the ‘Romance’ section of the shop. Her eyes flitted about as she walked, pausing on titles such as The Canterlot Affair, and After All Is Said: How to Win Her Back, or even Twilight. She shook her head, continuing on. Once she had reached the edge of the shop and read most of the spines in that bookshelf, she turned the corner and was greeted with a view full of freckles. “Wah! Applejack, what are you doing here?” Twilight retreated a step. The orange earth pony had been looking at a display of some hoof-sized black and pink boxes, which were turned so that Twilight couldn’t see their fronts. She was also holding a similar box in one of her hooves. Applejack whirled towards Twilight, blinking several times. “Uh, hiya… Twi’. I’m not doin’ much, not anything really! Just checkin’ out this here shop I’ve never been to before. How about you?” Applejack gave a feeble grin and her eyes darted anywhere but to Twilight’s face, or to the boxes she stood beside. She took a quick step away from the display, simultaneously shifting her stance so that whatever she was holding moved out of Twilight’s line of sight. “Oh, you know, just checking out this bookstore, it seemed pretty interesting. I’ve never been here before, either, hehe,” Twilight said. “What’s that you’ve got?” “Oh this thing, this right here?” Applejack said. Her body remained motionless. “It’s, uh, apples.” “You brought apples to Madame J’s.” “Yup. For a… midnight snack. I always carry apples wherever I go, on account of I get hungry at night.” “Uh huh,” Twilight said. She looked up towards the ‘Adults Only’ sign nearby on the wall and blushed. She spun to face the way she had come. “Anyway, I should get going now, it’s getting pretty late. See you later!” She walked a few steps before turning her head to say in a casual tone, “I bet Rarity will love the, uh, apples.” She smirked and hurried away, ignoring Applejack’s incoherent sputtering behind her. Twilight chuckled into an elbow, then turned once again to the bookshelves on either side of her. She wiped a hoof down her face and groaned. Lighting her horn, she levitated four books out of the shelves, seemingly at random, and continued towards the center of the shop. Madame J came into view, placing books from a stack onto a few different wire racks. She glanced up at Twilight Sparkle’s approach, smiling when she caught sight of the books surrounded by a lavender aura floating in front of her. “I can help you over here. Did you find everything you were looking for?” Twilight nodded. “Yup.” She placed the books on the counter, looking around at the door to the shop. Madame J sorted through the books Twilight had picked out, and her eyebrows rose for a second. “Are you sure you found everything OK?” She began to ring up Twilight’s purchase as she talked. Twilight looked at the older mare and blinked. “Yes. But, I might come back some other time, if that’s all right, hehe.” She shifted her weight from hoof to hoof. “Of course, hon. Your total comes to 32 bits.” Twilight pulled out a bag and counted out a pile of coins, pushing them across the counter. “You’ve made some excellent choices, I think you’ll enjoy them,” Madame J said, bowing slightly before returning to the stack of books beside her. “Thanks!” Twilight whisked the books into her saddlebag, trotted across the walkway to the door, and exited the shop. She made it past a few streetlights before stopping and covering her mouth with a hoof. She started snorting through her nose and leaned on the nearest wall, her body shaking with stifled laughter.