‘That was a terrible idea.’
The thought came unbidden to my mind as I stood in the doorway to Twilight’s bedroom, leaning against the doorframe and watching her sleep with a smile on her face. Before I even fell to sleep the previous night, the thought that I was making a mistake by even pretending had lodged itself in my mind, and looking down at Twilight and having to resist waking her with a good morning kiss just cemented the worry.
This was going to be far more difficult than I thought.
Nonetheless, the logic-driven side of me reminded that Twilight wasn’t the only pony that I cared enough about to start a herd with, should I be so inclined. I was friends with plenty of ponies -- and with it being Equestria, most were mares -- so there were plenty of other choices out there; there were plenty of other fish in the sea. While I cared deeply about Twilight -- loved her, even -- if she didn’t want to be with me, I wasn’t going to force the issue. I cared about her too much to throw away our long friendship over some silly crush I had on her, and I knew that even though it would be difficult, I could overcome this if I put my mind to it.
But did I want to?
...no, I didn’t.
Much as it hurt to know Twilight just didn’t want what I did, I didn’t want to just get over it. I’d felt differently about her for a long time, so simply forgetting about it all wasn’t an option. We lived together, and regardless of what Twilight thought of herself, she was a beautiful, desirable mare that anyone would be lucky to have. I knew for a fact that the relationship between the two of us was strong enough to weather almost anything, but if she wasn’t willing to give the concept of “us” a chance, I wasn’t going to push it at the moment. That didn’t mean that it didn’t bother me, but fear makes ponies do and think strange things. Perhaps with time things would change...or perhaps not. Either way, Twilight and I were going to remain close, no matter what happened between us.
The pain I felt in my heart from her rejection still hurt, though, and I knew I’d have to get away for a bit to clear my head. With that in mind, I made my way to Twilight’s personal writing desk and quickly scrawled a note out before walking over and placing at the bedside table next to her. Looking down at Twilight, however, I was unable to simply leave, and found myself reaching out and gently brushing the stray locks of hair away to frame her serene expression. Smiling gently at the sight, I turned on my heel and strode from the room -- and subsequently, the castle -- before extending my wings and pushing off with a mighty flap into the air.
Like pegasi, I was able to float on clouds as a dragon that had wings. Unlike pegasi, I didn’t have to worry about thunderheads jolting me, since dragonhide was virtually impervious to most non-magical energies. This meant that I had the perfect perch upon which to look out over Ponyville from the top of the supercell that was over the Everfree, alone with my thoughts.
Much as I tried to tear my mind away from her, Twilight dominated my thoughts, and I found myself halfway wishing I hadn’t admitted to her how I felt. However, I knew I wouldn’t have been able to hide from her what I felt, since we had long ago promised not to keep things of any import from each other. Now, that didn’t mean that neither of us had privacy from the other, but we had found over the years that it was better to be honest about what we felt and thought in order to keep harmony within the household, since we lived together.
Still, I’d just gotten together with Rarity after years of pining, so maybe I should just be happy with her.
With a deep sigh, I did a half-flip to point at the ground a few thousand feet away before plunging through the cloud. The powerful updraft pulled at me and the moisture drenched me, but I held firm and let myself fall on a course toward the earth far below. I couldn’t see the ground through the dense cloud, but the instinct within me to open my wings grew and grew until I couldn’t wait any longer, so I angled myself toward the unseeable sky again before flaring my wings and catching the thick air to slow myself. I burst from the bottom of the thunderhead to a torrent of rain and crosswinds, which I fought for about a minute before touching down on the soaked ground of the forest.
Even when ponies would be inside to get out of the rain, the Everfree forest was alive with activity in the midst of the storm, the many creatures of the forest delighting in the life-giving rain. From every direction I could see animals large and small drinking, washing or just playing in the rain that fell in droves. It made me smile, regardless of the fact that I was getting soaked straight through my clothes, which served to lift my spirits a bit in the process.
Being out in nature always served to give me a sense of peace even in my most stressful moments, which was why I enjoyed simply being able to fly wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted. It all allowed me a freedom I’d never known as a younger dragon, seeing as how I usually had to take a train or flying chariot to get anywhere in a decent amount of time, but having my own wings opened the world to me. True that there were some places I hadn’t been to -- the Lupine Tundra among them -- but being able to just...go places was nice.
Nonetheless, today was not an off-day for me, so I had work to do that couldn’t be put off any longer. With a long sigh of resignation, I pushed off of the ground with a strong flap of my wings and headed back toward Ponyville.
Work was boring and monotonous, as it usually was, but it was also pretty quick considering I had gotten started later in the day. By lunch I was finished with what was on the schedule, which left the rest of my day open to do whatever unless Twilight had something important that she hadn’t been able to put on the schedule (Twilight refraining to put something on the work schedule was near impossible though, so I didn’t really worry about that). The day was nice in late autumn however, which gave me the opportunity to just walk around town and see the sights.
As usual, everyone offered me a smile and/or wave as I made my way through the streets of the homey town, with more than a few ponies personally greeting me by name. It did wonders to bring me out of my mental rut, and before I knew it, I couldn’t help but smile as well. Things might not be at their best right now, but I knew that Ponyville was still the place I loved, with the ponies I loved living in it, and that was more than enough to bring a smile to my face.
“Spike!”
The panicked call quickly caught my attention, as well as that of everyone else within earshot, and we all looked to see Applebloom dashing toward me at a speed that was downright scary. Before I could even ask what was happening, she latched onto my arm and began using her powerful form to pull me away.
As I stumbled and tried my best to set my feet underneath me I asked, “Where’s the fire, ‘Bloom? What’s going on?”
“No time,” she huffed quickly, continuing to pull me along, “we need to get to the Acres quick!”
Recognizing the sheer amount of worry in her tone, I pulled her to a stop and kneeled, motioning to my back. “Then climb on and I’ll get us there while you explain just what you’re getting me into.”
She quickly complied, clambering onto my back and grasping tightly around my midsection. Before we could take off though, she said only one thing that kicked my urgency into overdrive: “Applejack’s in trouble!”
My wings flared strongly as I made a touchdown in front of the farmhouse of Sweet Apple Acres, barely noticing as Applebloom dropped off of my back and onto her hooves. Whirling my head around rapidly I shouted out, “Where is she?”
“This way!” Applebloom answered, taking off at a panicked pace toward the southwestern fields, where Sweet Apple Acres bordered the Everfree forest.
I followed just behind Applebloom, keeping my eyes and ears open for any indication of what I would find and trying not to think of the worst. Fortunately, it didn’t take long to see Thunderlane pacing around a collapsed section of fencing, giving way to what looked like a sinkhole. The sound of Big Mac’s deep voice shouting at him could be heard, though I won’t repeat the curses he was slinging, but it was clear to me what was going on.
My heart dropped into my stomach when I arrived on site and looked into the hole.
Big Mac had his hands wrapped around one end of an overturned cart that they used to haul things around the farm, shouting angry and frightened pleas to help at Thunderlane as the latter just paced with a panicked expression, muttering over and over again how he “just can’t”. I shoved the pegasus out of the way before hopping down into the giant hole that was far deeper than it looked -- at least twenty feet down -- and walking over to Big Mac.
I didn’t have to guess what had happened as I asked, “Is she all right?”
Big Mac locked eyes with me, and I saw tears gathering in the corners of his own eyes as he answered, “A-Ah don’t know, she ain’t answerin’ me.”
I wasn’t able to see any sign of Applejack because of the rubble of the broken cart, but I knew she had to be underneath it somewhere, and I wasn’t going to give up until she was safe.
Turning my head toward the lip of the hole I shouted, “Applebloom, I need you to bring me the axe!” Applebloom disappeared from the lip and I heard her hooves hitting the ground as she ran, but then knew I had to reassure the eldest sibling of the Apple family. I turned my attention to Big Mac and leveled him with a serious stare. “We’ll get her out of here, Mac; I promise. She’ll be fine.”
I just hoped I wasn’t lying to him.
Big Mac nodded slowly, but didn’t take his eyes off of the cart that his hurt sister was under. I then turned toward the frantically muttering Thunderlane and shouted, “Hey!” He jumped a bit and shot his eyes to me, so I pointed to the sky. “Make yourself useful and go get Nurse Redheart and Nurse Tenderheart from the hospital. We’ll need them here, because I don’t want to move Applejack any more than I have to.”
Seemingly relieved to be of use, Thunderlane nodded and shot into the sky in a blur of speed toward Ponyville General, which left Big Mac and I alone. The giant of a stallion was still holding firmly onto one end of the cart, his muscles straining and his body sweating. I quickly looked around the sinkhole and found two decently-sized stones, which I brought over to the side Mac was holding. With a grunt, I grasped the cart next to him and lifted, using my foot to slide first one stone, and then the other underneath the end of the cart we had been holding, allowing Mac to rest while we waited for Applebloom to return with the axe. With the immediate danger removed, I surveyed the site to see exactly what we were dealing with.
From the way the cart had fallen and splintered into the earth, it was clear that both Applejack and a few barrels had been on top of it, and the debris had prevented Big Mac from getting underneath to get his sister out. The cart didn’t look in danger of falling apart, though -- being made of well-tended, solid oak (which was what made it so heavy) -- but the stability of the cart itself meant that we couldn’t simply move it on our own or pull it apart. After all: Mac and I were strong, but we weren’t superheroes.
I continued inspecting the area, and found some rubble around the side of the cart that wasn’t part of what was keeping it together, so I slowly and carefully began to move it away to see if I could find a way to dig Applejack out. Much to my displeasure, there didn’t seem to be a way to move much without possibly causing the remainder of the cart to collapse, but the hole I’d made was large enough for me to reach through and feel around. It seemed that at least two barrels worth of twisted wood was still underneath the cart itself, but after a moment I found something that felt like a hand.
With wide eyes, I turned to Mac and beckoned him over. “I found her hand; check her pulse, Mac.” I held my hands up and explained, “My scales are too thick to feel it.”
Big Mac scrambled over to me with a nearly-manic expression, and dropped to his knees before fishing his arm through the gap I’d made. He felt around for a few moments, eyes closed, before gasping in relief.
“Sh-she’s alive...thank Celestia she’s alive!” he cried out in relief, releasing a long breath in the process. He then pulled away and sat on the rocky ground, nodding to me. “Pulse is nice ‘n’ strong, so Ah know she at least ain’t bleedin’ out. Prob’ly banged up purdy good, but that ain’t nothin’ the nurses won’t be able ta fix.”
The morbid part of my mind reminded me that there were plenty of crippling brain injuries possible that wouldn’t coincide with profuse bleeding, but I kept my mouth shut for the moment. Big Mac needed to be reassured, not scared, so I just nodded silently while we waited.
The pounding of hooves on dirt approached, and I stood just as Applebloom arrived at the side of the hole, axe in hand. “Ah got it!”
I opened my hands and gestured for her to toss it down, which she did without a moment’s hesitation. Catching the axe in my hands, I turned to Big Mac and handed it to him, pointing at the side of the hole. “Set it over there for now; we need to find some more stones to prop this up so it doesn’t fall when we split it.”
It took a minute or so of careful excavation around the area, but Big Mac and I found a few more suitable stones to prop up both sides of the ruined cart. With that, I handed the axe to Big Mac and stood back while he got to swinging.
I was a hardy guy -- there was no getting around that, being a dragon and all -- but Big Mac was a veritable powerhouse of pure earth pony strength. He hefted the axe into the air and brought it down repeatedly as if it were nothing, making quick work of the flat underside of the cart. A single, long split down the middle separated the two halves, and after gripping one of said halves, Big Mac and I gave a collective grunt as we lifted the halves, one by one, up and off of the trapped farmpony underneath.
What we all found was worrying.
Applejack wasn’t actively bleeding, but the entire right side of her face was discolored from blunt force, and swollen worryingly. Furthermore, her right arm was clearly broken -- it was bent oddly between the elbow and shoulder -- and shallow cuts from the splintered wood covered her body. She was breathing, luckily, but the rest of her looked like she’d been in a fight with a timberwolf.
Without waiting for prompting, I gathered Applejack into my arms gently before slowly and painstakingly flapping my wings to ascend as slowly as possible. Once I cleared the lip of the sinkhole, I walked a short distance away before laying Applejack down onto solid ground, then going back and helping Big Mac exit the hole. Once the both of us were on flat ground again, we both rushed over to see what we could do for Applejack. From just initial observations, I knew there wasn’t much we were going to be able to do for her arm other than splint it, but some basic triage could mean the difference between healing properly and being crippled for life.
“Applebloom, I need you go get two flat sticks we can use as a splint, and some rope or cloth to tie it.” I ordered, keeping my eyes on Applejack. “Big Mac, stay with Applejack and I’ll go get some ice for her face to bring down the swelling.” With the orders given out, I took to the skies toward the farmhouse at a speed that I rarely used, simply because the lack of tail fins made it harder to steer, but the worry for Applejack’s wellbeing overrode my need for personal safety.
I landed only a few seconds later in front of the farmhouse, seeing Granny Smith waiting anxiously on the front step for someone to tell her what was happening. I offered a simple explanation of, “Applejack alive; nurses on the way,” before entering the house and heading toward the kitchen. Reaching under the cabinet and grabbing a plastic bag, I flung open the freezer and began shoveling ice inside of the bag until it was full. I then wrapped a dish towel around it and headed back to the door, stopping when Granny Smith grabbed my arm in a surprisingly strong grip.
She fixed me with a stern eye as she ordered, “Ya better look after mah granddaughter, ya hear? Ah wanna have grandfoals from her yet, Spike.”
Despite the situation, Granny Smith’s words caused a smile to jump to my face, and I nodded. “I’ll take care of her, Granny Smith.”
The elderly mare nodded to me with a reassured smile and shooed me away, so I again took flight and made my way back to where Big Mac was waiting for me. I was relieved to see Applebloom had already returned -- rather quickly, I might add -- with two planks and a length of rope. I landed next to them and approached, handing the wrapped ice pack off to Applebloom and dropping to my knees next to Big Mac.
He looked at me with a grimace as he held the two planks in his hands. “We gotta straighten it.”
I looked down at the misshapen arm and swallowed hard, nodding. “All right then, let’s do it.” Just by the way it was broken, I knew Applejack wasn’t going to be doing heavy lifting for quite awhile -- her humerus was completely snapped -- but seeing as how winter was just around the corner, she would have plenty of time to recover. I just hoped the bash to her head hadn’t caused any sort of brain injury.
With another nod to Big Mac, I took the arm in my hands and wasted no time in quickly pulling and straightening the arm, causing a pained whine from Applejack as she squirmed around despite her unconsciousness. I grabbed the wooden pieces and placed them on either side of the break, then looped the rope around it a few times before tying a knot. I knew that it looked messy, but triage was about doing as much as possible to stabilize the patient before more specialized treatment could be administered, and I definitely wasn’t a doctor.
A whistling sound caught my attention, and I turned my eyes skyward to see Thunderlane approaching with an emergency chariot from Ponyville General. Two familiar ponies were on board -- Nurses Red Heart and Tenderheart, respectively -- which meant that Thunderlane had been at least somewhat useful and had returned with help.
Thunderlane flared his powerful wings, slowing to a hover so that the swiveling chariot could softly touch down first before he landed. The two nurses bounded off of the chariot as soon as it was safe, and rushed over to Applejack with instruments in their hands.
After a brief checkup, both looked to us with a smile as Red Heart assured, “She has a mild concussion, but besides that and her arm, it looks worse than it is. You three did a good job of getting her out of there and safe. If you’ll follow us to the hospital, we’ll get started right away.”
I nodded and helped them load Applejack onto the chariot, belting her in to be sure she didn’t move too much. After only a few seconds, the nurses boarded, and once again the chariot was airborne. I was happy that Applejack was going to be all right, but I couldn’t help as worry clutched at my stomach regardless. I didn’t like seeing my friends hurt, and Applejack was always such a strong mare; it just seemed wrong for her to be so hurt, for some reason.
I turned to the two Apple siblings standing worriedly behind me and stated, “I’ll fly ahead and gather all the girls to meet us there. You two get Granny Smith ready and come to the hospital when you can; we’ll be waiting.”
Without waiting for a response, I shot into the sky and went about finding and gathering the other five representations of the Elements of Harmony, trying my best not to think about how bruised and battered Applejack was.
Within the hour, the waiting room of the ER was clamoring with ten ponies, all stressed to the breaking point and trying to look on the bright side as best we could, but it wasn’t working all that well. For one, the Apple family looked like they were waiting for that terrible news that yet another loved one of theirs was lost, and I couldn’t honestly reassure them of otherwise. After all, I was well aware that complications with even the simplest injury could cause disfigurement or even death, so I knew that in this case, saying nothing at all and simply being a reassuring presence was the best thing to do at the moment.
Rarity, on the other hand, had a far more active way of letting her feelings be known.
“...AND YOU COULDN’T DO ANYTHING BUT STAND AROUND LIKE A USELESS SACK OF FEATHERS WHILE SHE COULD BE DYING!”
No one saw fit to correct her, because in all honesty, our feelings on the matter wouldn’t let us. I was understanding when it came to many things, but regardless of whatever issue he might have been having, I couldn’t understand how Thunderlane, who claimed to love Applejack, could do nothing when something so serious happened. I couldn’t help but morbidly imagine how bad things might have gotten had Big Mac or I not been available. True that Thunderlane was just one pony, but I was the one who’d had to take control of the situation when he’d been freaking out instead of helping.
I just didn’t get it, but then again I wasn’t him.
Thunderlane just glared at Rarity, as if trying to burn a hole in her head. “You wouldn’t understand; you don’t suffer from taphophobia like I do, so you wouldn’t know just how debilitating it can be. I can’t even be buried in sand at the beach without freaking out, and you all expect me to jump into a hole?” He shook his head with a sneer. “I’m not apologizing for that, so get over it.”
I caught the twitch in Rarity’s arm just before her hand rose to slap some sense into the pegasus she was shouting at, but at much as I wanted her to follow through with it, I had to stop her. From my place just behind her, I reached out before she could connect and grasped her wrist firmly, shaking my head with a frown.
“Rarity,” I urged in a firm yet calm tone, “this isn’t helping. Shouting at Thunderlane isn’t going to undo the damage done, and making him feel bad isn’t going to make anyone feel better.” I pulled Rarity back into me and wrapped my wings and arms around her, resting my head beside hers. “I know you’re upset, and worried, but getting into a shouting match isn’t going to do any good. For now, the best we can do is be here for them.” I ended my statement by pointing the joint of my wing at the three Apple family members.
Thunderlane looked relieved at my intervention. “Thanks Spike, I-”
I snapped my gaze to him with a snarl. “I didn’t do it for you, Thunderlane. I’m sure Applejack would have her own choice words for you, but for now, slinging venom your way isn’t going to solve anything, so everyone needs to just sit down, shut up, and wait for whatever the doctors have to say.”
Thunderlane looked like he wanted to say something, but he wasn’t stupid enough to start an argument while already being on thin ice with everyone, so he reluctantly took his seat and waited just like the rest of us. I wordlessly pulled Rarity to sit in my lap as I took the chair between Big Macintosh and Rainbow Dash, doing my best to keep the nervous tremors from showing through my wings as we continued to wait.
We waited, and waited, and waited some more.
Finally, after nearly an hour and a half since the time we arrived at the hospital, a doctor came walking out into the waiting room and announced, “Applejack Apple?”
All of us stood and approached the doctor, allowing the three family members to the front as Granny Smith asked, “How’s mah granddaughter, doctor?”
The doctor -- a tan stallion whose name I couldn’t read from my place behind Rainbow Dash -- flipped through the chart and read off what he had. “She was admitted with what seemed to be mostly surface injuries and a fractured humerus, but upon analysis we also found a mild concussion. Other than that, it appears she was very lucky. She will be on the mend for awhile, but we expect a full recovery.” We all released a collective sigh of relief before the doctor continued with, “She’s currently sedated at the moment so she could rest through the pain, but I can allow family to see her for tonight. The rest of you will need to return tomorrow, after she’s had time to sleep off the worst of it.”
Granny Smith reached forward and grasped the doctor’s hand, smiling brightly at him. “Thank ya for takin’ care of ‘er, doctor. Ah’d like ta see mah girl now, please.”
With the danger over and our fears assuaged, I nearly collapsed into the chair next to me as the doctor and Apples walked down the hall toward the patient rooms. I rubbed my tired eyes and sighed heavily, glad that Applejack was going to be okay.
Rarity took a seat next to me and the rest of the girls surrounded me as Rainbow praised, “Ya did good, Spike.”
I closed my eyes and breathed deeply a few times before muttering, “Y’know, the whole time Mac and I were trying to get her out of there, I couldn’t help but think that maybe we wouldn’t be able to save her, or she had, like, crazy brain damage or something. I didn’t say it because I didn’t want to worry him, but…” I sighed again, feeling more of the residual tension leave my body through the breath. “I’m just glad she’s okay.”
“Because of you, Spike.” Fluttershy commented softly, her tone light and relieved. “You were there when one of us needed you the most, just like you always are, and you saved her.”
I chuckled tiredly, shaking my head. “It was just a lucky break ‘Shy, and that’s just it:” I sat up a little straighter with a more serious look on my face, “if I hadn’t been there, she might not be so okay right now. What if I had been out of town, or in Canterlot?”
“Don’t do that to yourself, Spike.” Rainbow Dash chided sternly. “Don’t torture yourself by thinking about the ‘what-ifs’. What matters is that you were there, and you probably saved her life.”
“Yeah…” I breathed out, slumping back into the chair again, “I did, didn’t I? That was pretty cool.”
Rainbow Dash nodded with a wide grin. “It was. Yet again, you were there when one of us needed you the most, and I know Applejack will be thankful.”
For the mares around me all took seats close together, and we spent the following time just sitting quietly, letting the stress of the day pass out of us with the confirmation that Applejack was going to recover.
Twenty minutes had passed since the Apples had gone back to visit Applejack, and I was trying my best to relax when a voice suddenly brought me back to attention.
“Spike?” called a gentle voice from near the front desk of the waiting room, and we all swiveled our heads to see Nurse Redheart approaching with a smile on her face. “She’s awake, and she’s asking for you.”
I frowned slightly. “She’s asking for me? Why?”
Nurse Redheart shrugged. “She didn’t say, but she’s been calling for you for a few minutes now after finding out what happened to her. We don’t normally allow anypony but family members back after so soon, but she refuses to accept that. Her response was, and I’m quoting, ‘If y’all don’t get ‘im in here, Ah’ll drag mahself out there on mah own.’”
I chuckled despite it all, and nodded. “Yeah, that sounds like Applejack.”
“Wait wait wait, what about me?” Thunderlane broke in angrily. “I’m her coltfriend!”
Nurse Redheart only shrugged as she looked to him with a neutral expression. “She didn’t ask for you -- she asked for Spike. You can see her tomorrow with everypony else.”
Thunderlane growled and looked as if he wanted to argue, but the hard stares of Rainbow Dash and Rarity kept him from causing trouble, and he instead stomped out of the hospital while muttering curses under his breath.
I watched Thunderlane leave until the doors closed, then turned back to Nurse Redheart as I stood. “All right then, let’s go see Applejack.” I turned back to the girls and offered, “I’ll be home in a bit, so you all can wait for me until I get back unless you have something important going on.”
One by one, they all shook their heads as Twilight answered, “We’re free, Spike. We’ll see you when you get home.”
I nodded before following Nurse Redheart as she led me through the double-doors that closed off the patient rooms from the rest of the hospital. We walked for a few moments before stopping at room 127, where the deep voice of Big Mac could be heard within.
Nurse Redheart turned to me with a strained expression on her face. “As I said, we don’t normally allow this, so try and keep it brief. Regardless of what she might think right now, she needs to rest.”
I nodded solemnly as the nurse walked away. I stood in the hall for a moment to collect myself before bracing my hand against the door and pushing it open, stepping inside.
Ponyville’s Apple family was huddled together, talking softly to each other in a way that made me feel as though I was intruding. Upon my entrance though, Granny Smith turned around to look at me, and beckoned me forward with a wrinkled hand. Applejack looked pretty much the same as I’d found her, though now covered in bandages and with a plethora of lines leading into her body from the various machines and drips around her. The blood around her face had been cleaned away, but she still looked like she’d just lost a fight with a timberwolf. Yet again, I was struck with just how wrong it felt for Applejack to be so...vulnerable. I was so used to her being so strong and dependable, that I seemingly forgot that she was just a pony like everyone else.
Applejack’s non-swollen eye was focused sharply on me, and she held up her arm in a beckoning motion. After a moment of me standing still like a fool, she frowned and threatened, “Spike, get over here and gimme a hug. Don’t think Ah won’t get outta this bed and put ya in a headlock if ya don’t.”
Chuckling despite it all, I nodded and approached, leaning down and wrapping arm around Applejack as gently as I could to avoid hurting her. She wasn’t having any of that though, and used her powerful arm muscles to drag me down onto the bed in a tight embrace, to the point where I was practically on top of her. Forgoing my original plan, I instead wrapped both arms around Applejack’s back and held her tightly until she let go, gently lowering her back to the bed as I stood back up.
Applejack, bruised as she was, was still able to smile warmly up at me as she quipped, “Saved tha day again, Spike.”
I just rolled my eyes and shook my head. “It was a group effort, Applejack. All I did was make sure everyone did what needed to be done instead of losing their heads. Applebloom got the axe, Big Mac chopped up the cart, and Thunderla-”
“Spike, Ah…” Applejack interrupted, her expression souring, “Ah don’t wanna talk about him right now.”
I didn’t like where this was going…
“Applejack,” I pleaded softly, “if you’d have been really hurt, him doing what he did might have saved your life.”
“Ah’ll tell you who would’a saved mah life:” she shot back, frustration and anger roiling in her eye and tone, “it was tha drake that helped get me out from under all that stuff, and tha one that took control’a tha situation when everypony was losin’ their heads. That’s who saved me, not some scaredy-pegasus who couldn’t even jump in a hole fer me. Ah don’t ask much’a mah friends, other than that they give as much as Ah do.” She then snarled up in my direction, the full brunt of her annoyance focused on me. “So, you tell me how Ah’m supposed ta feel when Ah find out mah coltfriend was so wrapped up in ‘imself that he couldn’t help me when Ah needed it tha most!” She was shouting by the end of her outburst, and after doing so was panting with rage. I knew her anger wasn’t actually directed at me, but it was scary to be around her when she was like this. After a few moments of deep breaths, she calmed and looked away from me. When she spoke again, her tone sounded much more sombre, almost broken. “If he wouldn’t do that fer me, Ah know he wouldn’t do nothin’ fer tha rest of mah fam’ly. Ah don’t need that kinda pony in mah life.”
Much as Thunderlane could be a bit of a jerk sometimes, I didn’t want Applejack making a rash decision simply because she let her temper get the best of her. “Applejack, you’re not thinking straight right now. Sleep on it; we’ll talk about it tomorrow.”
“Be here t’morrow in tha mornin’, Spike.” she continued, acting as if she hadn’t even heard me. “Ah want ya here when Ah talk to ‘im. Knowin’ his work schedule, he’ll be here at tha start of visiting hours at 9:00, so Ah want ya here then. Can ya do that fer me?”
I just stared at her for a moment, dumbfounded at how she was acting. “A-Applejack, I think you might be making a rash decision here.”
Her eye narrowed at me, and she repeated, “Can ya do it? Ah ain’t askin’ ya to agree with me; all Ah’m askin is fer ya ta be there fer me.” Even through her stern expression, I could see the wavering vulnerability in her eye, and the glassiness that came with unshed tears. Then came the clincher, as she nearly whispered out a soft, “Please, Spike?”
I didn’t like this at all. Out of all of us, Applejack had the longest relationship with another pony, and I had assumed she was happy with him. I had my own personal feelings about Thunderlane, of course -- to put it simply, I didn’t like him -- but he was Applejack’s special somepony, not mine, so I usually just avoided him when I could. On the surface it looked to me like Applejack was making a rash decision, but deep down, I knew her better than that. Applejack had a temper, it was true, but she made it a point to think through things that were important. That meant that either the relationship Applejack had with Thunderlane didn’t matter as much as I thought, or there were other issues in their relationship before this whole event happened.
I didn’t know the whole story, but I knew that I would be there for my friend, no matter what.
I reached out and took Applejack’s hand in my own, nodding firmly. “Okay. I’ll be here tomorrow in the morning.”
“Thank you, Spike.” Applejack replied with a smile, pulling me down once again to embrace me. It was then that something odd happened that had never happened to me before, at least not with Applejack.
As she held me close, her earthy-yet-feminine scent caressing my nose, I very clearly felt as Applejack’s soft lips planted a kiss on the side of my face, only an inch or so away from the corner of my mouth. I froze, and her lips lingered for a few seconds before she pulled away, causing me to do the same. Instead of a blush like I’d expected or even averted eyes, Applejack was smiling serenely at me, her good eye locked onto me.
I smiled crookedly at her, unsure of how to feel about her uncharacteristic gesture of affection. I suppose I should feel flattered that she thought me a close enough friend to do that to, but at the same time, I was both excited and worried about what it meant...or that it meant nothing at all. It was all so confusing and I wasn’t sure how to respond, but thankfully Applejack broke the silence on her own.
She groaned a bit as she shifted in the bed. “Well, Ah’m really happy y’all are here, but these drugs’re startin’ ta get ta me, so Ah’m gonna call it a night.”
We all said our goodbyes and goodnights to Applejack before leaving as a unit, walking to the waiting area together. It was a slow, somber sort of walk, more out of mental exhaustion than anything else. Still, I couldn’t stop thinking about the unexpected kiss Applejack had given to me, but worked to steel myself and act simply as if I were very tired, which wasn’t much of a stretch, really.
When we finally made it to the waiting area that was still filled with the other five Element-bearers, I turned to the Apple family and asked, “Are the three of you okay, or do you want a dragon to walk you home?”
Big Mac looked over his younger sister and grandmother before shaking his head with a tired smile. “Naw, Ah think we’ll be all right. Have a good one, Spike.”
I nodded and waved goodbye to the Apple family as we all left the hospital, each going our separate ways as late afternoon gave way to evening. It had been a trying day for all of us, but because of a certain instance that apparently only I had noticed, my mind refused to stay quiet. I knew none of the others would judge me for it though, so as soon as I was sure it was just me and the Element-bearers, I made my thoughts known.
“Applejack kissed me.” I calmly stated, or at least as calmly as I could considering what I was saying.
Of course, all six of us stopped at hearing that, and Rarity blurted out, “I’m sorry, what now?”
“Applejack kissed me.” I repeated a little more loudly. “Not on the lips or anything, but...well when we were hugging before I left, she gave me a kiss on my cheek; she’s never done anything like that before, at least not to me.”
“Well,” Rainbow Dash began with a shrug, “you did just save her life, and no matter what you might think, that’s the truth. If you hadn’t been there, she might not have been able to do anything ever again.”
I shook my head. “She’s been grateful to me before for things, but that’s the first time she’s given me a kiss for anything. It’s just...odd for me, is all. I’m so used to seeing Applejack as almost one of the guys, so it’s different for her to act like that. I never dated her or anything, so I don’t know her as any different than a rough-and-tumble farmpony that makes fun of how prissy Rarity is.”
My half-playful jab at Rarity was received well enough, as she just smiled and shook her head. “We all know that Applejack has never placed much stock in acting like a classy lady, but that does not mean she is not still a mare. Though she may not show them as much, Applejack has feelings just like any of us, and after being told she could have lost her life -- and that you were the one that saved her -- it makes sense that she would wish to show her gratitude to her savior.”
I shrugged, having no choice but to accept it, as the alternatives were worrying for a number of reasons. “I guess. I just wasn’t expecting it is all.” Before we could continue our way home, however, I added, “I think she might be breaking up with Thunderlane tomorrow, though.”
At this, the only one who looked surprised was Fluttershy, though I’m not sure why. It’s no secret that Thunderlane and I had never gotten on well, and as Rainbow Dash had explained months ago, “Anypony who doesn’t like Spike isn’t the kind of pony I want to know.” I had to admit that I agreed with her, and not because of my own ego. All of the Element-bearers were close with me, so if someone didn’t like me, what did that say about them? Six mares -- and national heroines, at that -- can’t all be wrong, can they?
Rainbow Dash was the one to break the growing-awkward silence with, “It’s about time.” Everypony present nodded in silent agreement, except for one…
“What do you think, Fluttershy?” I asked gently, so as not to make my friend any more nervous than she had to be.
Regardless, Fluttershy almost cringed as she was put on the spot, but still answered with a soft, “I-I just think she might be making a rash decision in anger.”
I nodded, agreeing with her. “I think the exact same thing, but she wanted me to be there with her tomorrow when she talks to him. The way she was talking, I don’t think their conversation could be anything but a breakup. She was practically dripping anger when she talked about him, but this is her decision, not mine.” I then shook my head with a huff of both frustration and confusion. “What I don’t get is why she wants me there instead of somepony else.”
We started walking again as a group as Twilight questioned, “What do you think would happen if Big Mac were there and Thunderlane blew up at Applejack?”
I shrugged. “He’d tear Thunderlane apart, and then the hospital would have another patient. I get that, because she knows I’ll keep my cool regardless, but I still don’t get why she couldn’t have asked any of the rest of you, though.”
Fluttershy, who had been mostly quiet all day, piped up with, “She feels safe with you, Spike.”
“You’re always there for us, Spikey.” Pinkie chimed, smiling widely at me as she took my arm in her own and walked beside me. “Even when you were little, you were always there for us when we needed help, even if you couldn’t do much. You just protected Applejack when she was covered in ouchies, so she knows she can trust you to watch out for her when she can’t.”
I shrugged again. “I mean, I guess, but you all -- including Applejack -- would do the same for me.”
“Yes,” Rarity broke in, taking hold of my other, unoccupied arm, “but how many stallions do you believe Applejack feels she can truly trust like that? Not many, I imagine. Besides the fact that stallions are in short supply in Ponyville, you and I both know that earning the Element of Honesty’s complete trust is difficult indeed.”
I nodded. “Yeah, I know. Still, it’s because we’ve been through so much together. I’ve saved her, she’s saved me, we’ve saved each other -- it’s a cycle, and we know we can count on each other. I don’t understand why she’s suddenly putting all this trust in me now though.”
“Regardless of what you might believe or what she might delude herself into,” Twilight began, flipping her hair to the side and looking at me out of the corner of her eye, “Applejack is in a very vulnerable position right now, and she is naturally going to seek out those she trusts the most. In you, she likely sees the proof that there are good stallions out there that will treat her right, and so she is latching onto you for that reassurance, along with the comfort of knowing you will be there for her when she needs you, no matter the reason or severity of the instance.”
I just shook my head with a wry chuckle. “I really think you all are placing more importance on this than there needs to be, but all I know for sure is that Applejack wants me there with her, and I’m going to follow through. Whatever she’s actually feeling, that’s her business. If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years, it’s that trying to get Applejack to talk about her feelings is like trying to give a dragon a root canal: it’s going to be ugly, bloody, and I’m probably gonna get hurt.”
All the girls laughed at my words, which lightened up the atmosphere as we continued home. Once we reached the town’s heart though, we all began to separate and go to our separate homes. I gave Rarity a kiss goodbye -- much to the teasing of Rainbow Dash -- but eventually, it was just Twilight and I again, like it had been before I woke that morning.
As Twilight and I walked arm in arm toward our home, the creeping thoughts from the morning resurfaced, and I found myself soon having to fight from pulling away from her just to avoid the desire to kiss her. Twilight’s action of leaning her head on my shoulder -- which was neither new nor uncommon -- forced a sigh from me, soft though it was, and I couldn’t help but find it strange that Twilight still felt so comfortable around me. I mean, wouldn’t it make sense that Twilight would feel strange around me now -- at least a little bit? Instead, she was acting just as she always did toward me, which both relieved and stressed me: it relieved me because it meant that she still trusted me and cared deeply about me, but it stressed me because the whole walk home, I was constantly thinking of how easy it would be to just lean down, cup her cheek in my hand, and kiss her.
Just like I’d thought this morning, I couldn’t help but imagine that my “moving on” was going to be much more difficult than I thought, and I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to move on.
I was in love with Twilight, and it took Rarity’s prodding for me to realize it.
“Spike, are you all right?” Twilight asked suddenly, and I found her looking at me with concern clear in her amethyst eyes. “You seem very deep in thought.”
I mentally shook myself and sighed. “I’m just tired, and worried about Applejack.” It wasn’t exactly a lie, but neither was it the complete truth.
Luckily, Twilight bought it, and nodded before magicking the door in front of us open and leading us inside. “Me too. Today’s been quite a day for all of us, and I’m worried about Applejack’s emotional wellbeing. I can’t say I ever really thought she and Thunderlane were right for each other, but I don’t want her to make a mistake simply because she’s upset with him; that wouldn’t be fair to either of them.”
Glad to have another subject to think and talk about, I just shrugged and pushed my previous thoughts out of mind. “Well, it’s her choice in the end, and she’ll have to live with whatever consequences there are, good and bad. She just asked me to be there for her, so that’s what I’m going to do.” I then rolled my shoulder as Twilight finally pulled away from me, setting my jaw as thoughts of what tomorrow would bring washed over me. “As much as I try and keep calm, I almost hope Thunderlane loses his cool tomorrow, just so I can have an excuse to sock him in his face once or twice.”
Twilight patted me on the shoulder softly. “Easy Spike, we don’t need the guard called in because you beat Applejack’s ex-coltfriend.”
I rolled my eyes and brushed Twilight away. “Aw c’mon, it’ll just be a few love taps. He’s a grown stallion; he can take it.”
Twilight also rolled her eyes in response, shoving me playfully as she made her way to the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and rummaging through it for something quick to eat for the two of us. Respectfully, I looked away so I wouldn’t stare at the way her blue skirt framed her firm rump, her well-groomed tail slowly swishing from side to side in an almost playful manner.
It bothered me that Twilight was attractive in that adorably cute way without even trying, just by being herself.
Twilight finally pulled back and righted herself, turning to me with a small container of strawberries and a tub of whipped cream. Much as I tried not to, I couldn’t help but imagine that had things between Twilight and I been different, this would be a very flirty treat where we fed each other. Instead, she simply brought the two items over to the table, and we sat across from each other as we began fishing out strawberries and eating them with the sweet cream.
We ate in silence for quite awhile, just enjoying the downtime after such a long day.
“Why me, Spike?”
In a comical manner, her question caused me to inhale and choke on the strawberry I had just popped into my mouth, leading me to pound on my chest a few times to dislodge it. My mind was racing with questions of just what she could have meant besides the obvious, but I came up with nothing.
After coughing up the errant chunk of fruit and swallowing it to allow it to go down my esophagus instead of my windpipe, I brought my eyes to Twilight and blurted out, “Bwah?”
“Why me, Spike?” she repeated, her tone even and face relaxed despite the question. Had I been deaf and only able to go off of her facial expression, I would have thought she was just talking about the weather as she asked, “What about me made you think, ‘I want her’?”
While it was much harder for a blush to show through my scales, I was sure my face was flushed as I worked to compose myself even just a little bit. It took a few awkward moments and several throat-clearings later, but I was finally able to choke out, “A-are you serious?”
Twilight, who was usually the one out of both of us to get embarrassed, was calm enough for two, and simply nodded. “I’m very serious.”
Finally in control of myself -- though the flushed feeling in my face remained -- I coughed to clear my throat again and asked, “What brought this up? I was under the assumption that you had said all that you needed to about all of this.”
Twilight suddenly looked a little ashamed, and looked away from me with a deep sigh. “When we were sitting in that waiting room -- both with you and after you left to meet with Applejack -- I didn’t have anything to do but think, and I found myself wondering the greatest and most common question of all: why? Why me; why now?”
During Twilight’s short explanation, I had calmed myself down again, and was able to respond in a way that better suited me, rather than as a nervous and jittery little drake. “Well, you’re the pony I care about most in the entire world. You’re beautiful inside and out, you’re intelligent and kind, and you care more about others than you do yourself. Beyond that, I’ve known you my entire life; how could I not fall for somepony like you?” My explanation caused a faint dusting of blush along her cheeks, but I powered on anyway. “As for why now, you can thank Rarity for that. When Rarity asked us what we thought about herds, we both likely thought the same thing: that she was asking you to be in a herd with me and her.” I shrugged. “For the rest of the day, herding was on my mind, and for some reason even though I’d never really had a problem with herds nor ponies who were in them, I found the idea of me having a herd pretty strange. Still, you kept coming to mind at the forefront, and…” I nervously scratched the back of my head, “well, the idea was pretty attractive, I’ll admit. Rarity brought it all out of me, but it was something I wanted.”
“Wanted?” she echoed, raising her eyebrow at me.
I sighed and leaned back in the chair, chomping down another strawberry to give myself time to think about how to respond. On the one hand, I didn’t want to make things between Twilight and I any more strained than they were (at least on my end), but I also knew that Twilight deserved the complete truth. I’d made the mistake of keeping things from her lately, and it hadn’t worked out well for anyone.
“Well,” I began, swallowing harder than necessary, “I guess the present tense ‘want’ is more accurate. Unfortunately, wanting something isn’t enough to have it when it involves someone else.” I then shrugged helplessly. “I’ve experienced what it’s like to be forced into something you don’t want to do though, so I’d never do that to somepony else.” I then turned my eyes to Twilight, smiling softly. “...especially you.”
Twilight returned a ghost of a smile, but said nothing for a few minutes as we just ate in silence.
Eventually, the berries and cream ran out, and Twilight cleared her throat before leaning forward with a serious look on her face. “Spike, I want you to listen very closely to what I’m about to say, okay?”
I raised my brow, but nodded. “Y-yeah, sure.”
Twilight stared at me for a moment before taking a deep, calming breath. “Spike...the other reason I’ve stopped seeking another pony to add to my life is because I already have everything I need. I have friends that love and care about me, and…” she closed her eyes as her cheeks brightened a bit from a blush, “I have a certain special drake that means everything to me, and he’s everything I could want in a special somepony.” She then opened her eyes and smiled at me brightly, her eyes almost sparkling with happiness...or tears, I’m not sure which. To my surprise, she reached across the table and took my hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as she added, “I just...I can’t risk losing you because of my own inadequacies. I wouldn’t be able to survive it.” Twilight released my hand at that point, and glanced away as she muttered, just above a whisper, “You’re not the only one that’s thought about us being together.”
While one part of me was unbearably happy at what Twilight had just said, another much larger part of me was frustrated and angry. So, in an effort to keep from having an unfair outburst, I slammed my head on the table and groaned. After a few moments of this, and Twilight prodding me while worriedly calling my name, I picked myself up and stood from the table.
I composed myself as best I could before commenting, “I’m trying my best to get over all this Twi, but saying things like that is going to make things infinitely harder for me. I appreciate the honesty -- truly, I do -- but some truths are better left unsaid.” I sighed and rolled my shoulders, which were starting to cramp up with stress from the day as a whole. “I’m going to bed. See you tomorrow.”
Twilight called me at least once when I left, but I ignored it and just made my way to bed.
I had locked my door and activated the soundproofing crystal in my room, which meant that I would be left alone for the night, but I still wasn’t able to sleep. My mind and body were both exhausted, but still my thoughts ran in circles over what had happened during the day. Much to my annoyance, I just wasn’t able to rest, no matter what I tried, so I instead took flight off of my balcony and soared through the cool air of evening for awhile.
There’s no denying that I enjoyed the day, but the night had its own wonders that drew me, one of which was the fact that it was quiet. There were no ponies that wanted to talk to me, no noise from the bustling marketplace of Ponyville, and the sky was clear and free. The responsibilities and obligations of day were gone, which left me with time that was truly mine to do with as I wished. More than anything though, the flight through the cool air of night allowed me to relax just a bit, which would have to be enough. I was a social guy -- there was no getting around that -- but sometimes I needed time to just focus on me for a bit, since the majority of my time was devoted to doing things for everypony else in one way or another.
“Didn’t think I’d see you out here.”
The voice stopped me dead in my flight, and I turned around to see a familiar changeling soldier standing on the limbs of a tall tree I had been flying over near the Everfree. I thought for a moment that it was an odd place for somepony to stand on since there were plenty of clouds around, only to remember that changelings couldn’t stand on clouds.
I pulled back and reversed until I was hovering near the tree, and I could see Lyla bathed in the moonlight of the half-moon above us. She wore a half-shirt that cut off at where her bellybutton would be (if she had one), and the fitted shorts she wore told me she was likely enjoying the cool atmosphere as well. Unlike most other creatures, changelings required far less sleep than the rest of us, so it wasn’t exactly uncommon for me to see Lyla out and about late at night.
Still, if I didn’t know better, I’d say she was…
“Were you looking for me?” I asked, genuinely interested. After all, I had lived long enough to be skeptical of something that seemed to be a coincidence.
With a nod, Lyla confirmed what I thought. “I heard about what happened today, and I could feel your inner turmoil from across town. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but something tells me you could use a friend right now. After all, it isn’t often you just go for a night flight without a friend to accompany you.”
I sighed heavily; Lyla wasn’t going to outright make me tell her how I felt, but we both knew that with something of this magnitude, I would anyway. Putting it off was just going to waste both of our time, so I sucked it up and began to explain.
It took a few minutes to give backstory as to why I felt and thought the way I did at the moment, and then a few minutes more to catch Lyla up to what all had happened that day. By the end, we had both landed at my home and entered my room, and we both sat on my bed as I basically poured out my heart in an effort to get some of the pain and frustration out of me.
During my explanation, Lyla had moved over to my side and draped her arm around my shoulders, offering what comfort she could as I bled out all the stress that I had picked up from the past weeks and this day. Though I didn’t say it in words, we both could feel just how much her support meant to me.
“Well,” she began after I had finished, “it appears you’ve been dropped head-first into a pool of emotional turmoil. It seems that every time you turn around lately, there’s something else that’s putting strain on your heart and mind.”
I shook my head with a dry chuckle. “Ponies always praise me for keeping the Everfree border safe and such, but dealing with the beasts of the forest is easy compared to having to put up with everything else going on in my life right now.” I fell back onto my bed, in turn, falling out of Lyla’s embrace. For a few quiet moments, I just stared at the ceiling without saying anything. Finally, mostly to myself, I muttered, “Why can’t things ever be simple? Why can’t somepony just say, ‘hey, I like you; let’s be together’? There’s always some crazy thing that they’re dealing with, or there’s the fact that I’m head over heels in love with her, but she’s too afraid to take a risk with me.”
Lyla followed me to lay down, settling herself next to me as she let out a long breath of her own. “This thing with Twilight has you really torn up, I see.”
I nodded glumly, unable to do much else. “It’d be different if I didn’t live with her, but things would still be complicated; my entire life is complicated.” I then shook my head, as if trying to convince myself of what I was about to say. “I love my life, but I just wish it could be a little more simple in some aspects.”
I felt Lyla shift beside me before laying still, almost as if she were hesitating about something. For a long few minutes we were both silent, but then she broke the tranquil quiet by rolling over and mounting me in one smooth motion. I could only stare up at her as she straddled me, wondering what she was doing before she descended upon me and connected us in a kiss.
I’d never kissed a changeling before, so I didn’t know what I was getting into, but for those few moments we were connected, I felt everything she felt about me, and knew instantly that this act was not random for her. Through the unspoken bridge she had made with me, I saw who and what she was inside, and found that in much the way I had pined for Rarity, Lyla had been pining for me, her savior and best friend in the entire world.
And then, the moment was broken as she pulled away and looked down at me, capturing her lip between her teeth as she waited for me to respond. In those few moments we had just shared, I had seen all I needed to...and I acted on what I felt for once, instead of what I thought.
I reached up and pulled Lyla back down, bringing my hand up through her silky hair as I connected us once again. In Lyla, in that moment, I found simplicity in itself: she liked me, and I could readily admit that I liked her; we were -- and had been, apparently -- attracted to each other for a long time...and that was everything I needed to know.
Maybe later I would think back on how much a mistake this was or that I should have done things differently, but for tonight, there was only Lyla, my dark beauty.