“Mmmrrrfff...” I mrrrfff as I slowly open my eyes but I instantly close them back after a bright white light almost blinds me. ...Figuratively speaking, that is... Also...it’s freaking hot for some reason.
Hm...bright and hot... So I died and went to hell. ...Or Tartarus. Great. So now, as a pony spirit, I’ll try and find a way to look for Twilight. Well, if I’m a ghost, I can simply just...fly through things, right?
...How in blazes am I gonna get back home if I’m freaking dead?
...?
I feel something lying on my neck. I carefully and slowly open my eyes again, blinking a few times for my eyes to adjust to the brightness, and what I see before me are the bright green grass and more grass. It’s...daytime? And I’m lying on the ground on my side... ...I’m still alive? And what’s this thing on my neck? I pull a hoof to touch my neck, and my hoof touches something furry, but it’s not my neck.
“Mmmrrr...” I hear a purr of some sort close to my ear as whatever it is on my neck stirs. “...Five more minutes...”
...Well, ain’t that cute? I’m on the ground, lying on my side, slowly being baked by the harsh sun, and Reykan appears to be sleeping behind my head, resting his head on my neck. ...Unfortunately, I don’t have time for cute. I take a few breaths to prepare my pony body to move before I slowly rise up—
Thud! “...Mmmrrroowie...”
—on my four hooves. I hiss as I poke out of the tall grass, looking around. Damn... Is it hot today or what? Either I’m slightly feeling okay now or the heat is overtaking my brain’s pain-o-meter to ignore the other ouchies I had last night.
...Speaking of... I blink and look down at the sleeping panther under the shade of my own shadow.
...He didn’t eat me. For some strange reason, he didn’t eat me while I was...out.
I blink... Wait, maybe this is a dream.
...Eh, or not... My slightly ouchie body and the freaking hot air is real enough for me to believe that I’m still alive. So...I’m still alive... Reykan didn’t eat me. Should I count myself as lucky? Will Lady Luck continue to grace me or will she suddenly troll me sooner or later? Sigh... In before she trolls me just as I’m about to meet Twilight...
I look around and see Canterlot Mountain in the distance. The green hills are on the north and south, with a few specks of white on top of them. I turn and stare at the forest at the distance where we were supposed to be heading before I...blacked out last night... I guess my body was too freaking stoned but I just ignored it... Right. I shouldn’t do that again... At least, not with a predator nearby...
Anyway, the forest is still a distance away... And damn... It’s freaking hot! I squint my eyes as I try to look up at the heavens. It’s a freaking clear sky, as always. No clouds in sight, and the sun appears to be at its highest peak. I take a deep breath, feeling the hot air in my lungs, and exhale as I look back at the forest. Right... I’ve been walking around for a while, so if my calculations are correct, I’ll probably reach the edge of the forest at around sunset. And that’s if I don’t faint from the heat and slash or exhaustion... Well, at least there are a few random trees around, so I can take a break and catch my breath under the tree’s shade if I need to.
And then I feel how dry my mouth is. Damn, I’m thirsty. I look around again, but nope, no water. I sigh... If there was any water close by, the unicorns wouldn’t be asking for rain clouds from the pegasi. ...Stupid rock-throwing unicorns.
Wait... I look back and stare at the tall Canterlot Mountain. Shouldn’t there be a waterfall on that mountain? Uh, now that I think about it, where does the water from the waterfall come from? Eh...whatever. I should get a move on.
I lift a hoof up to take a step, but I brush it over something furry. Oh, right... Reykan. I put said hoof over his small shoulder and gently shake him awake. “Oi... Reykan.”
No response.
I give him a small shake with my hoof again. “Kid... Wake up.” Why am I even trying to wake him up? I should just...get a move on. Yeah, this panther knows where Twilight is, but he already told me enough details on how to find her. I go to that forest, find a lot of dead trees, and presto!
...Cockatrice, though...
I slightly shake my head and try to wake him up in a gentle manner. Hey, I can leave him here, but sooner or later, he’ll find me eventually, probably be pissed that I left him here, and then will hunt me down and try to kill me. I might as well stay on his good side for a few more hours until I get to Twilight. It’s safer that way, I guess? “Rey?”
“...mmmrrrriizufarkgurmph—” he says and some other random, mumbled letters... And nope, he’s still snoring.
I roll my eyes and lean down to bite the skin behind his neck. What? I’ve seen cats do these things back home. That’s how they carry their kids. And eck...fur is weird on the tongue. I hope there’s some water in the forest for me to wash my mouth later.
My neck reminds me how painful it is as soon as I try to lift him up. Ow... Welp, this isn’t going to work. I let go of him and spit the fur out of my mouth and tongue. Bleeehhhk... Zero over ten would try again...
I slightly shake my head and take a breath before I bring a hoof over his shoulder to shake him to wakefulness. “Rey, get up.”
“...Mmmrrrr—I don’t wanna...” and he bats my hoof away with a paw. “...Zzz...”
I roll my eyes and lie down on my belly right next to him. “Rey, I...we need to get going.”
“...Go on without me...” he mumbles as he tries to curl into a ball. “...I’m still hunting...”
I roll my eyes.
“...Rabbits...mmm...” he smiles in his sleep. “...ev...ree...where...”
I sigh. “Look, whatever. Just... crawl and sleep on my back so I can start heading to the forest.” I blink. “...Actually, no. That’s a bad idea.” He’ll be directly exposed to the freaking hot rays of the noon sun. I remember reading something about dark colored clothes absorb more of the sun’s light, making the wearer feel hotter than those who are wearing light-colored clothes...
Well, my coat’s a light shade of brown, so...whatever.
I slightly shake my head, stand up on four hooves and look around, trying to find...something...anything that might help me. I can’t just...stay here and wait for him to wake up. If I force him to wake up, he’ll just slow us down by being sleepy and whatever. Unfortunately, all I see is green grass everywhere. I sigh as I slowly sit on my rump.
I blink. Huh...
I turn my head and look at my dark-brown tail. Hm... Ponies can move their tails, right? Heck, I’ve seen Applejack use her tail to swing a lasso in the ai—I thought I already told myself not to base everything here from the show? Eh, whatever... It’s worth a try, I guess. I slowly stand back up and concentrate, trying to tell my brain to make my tail move.
Come on, sweaty tail... Move... Move. Uh, swing?
After a minute or two of trying, I give up. Yep, I’m a lazy bastard sometimes. I let out a tired and defeated sigh as I sit on my rump again, my ear slightly twitching when I hear Reykan mumble something in his sleep. Hm... I stare at the panther for a few seconds before I turn my head to look at my tail again. It’s...long enough, I suppose.
I rise up, shuffle closer to the sleeping feline and sit down, resting my brown bum on the ground right next to Rey’s. Carefully, I turn my upper body as far as I can before I grab my tail with one hoof and Reykan’s tail with my other hoof.
...And then I remember that I can’t grab stuff with my hooves. I take a deep, deep breath and let out a heavy sigh... God freaking damnit...
...
... ...
... ... ...sigh... I should at least try. ...Yeah, sometimes I'm not totally a lazy bastard...
I push Reykan’s tail away and grab my tail with both hooves. I place them on the ground by my thigh and start to...roll it like rolling an old newspaper by dragging both my hooves on my tail. It’s...kinda working, so that’s progress.
It takes me a while but I eventually manage to accomplish what I want; a rolled tail. I then lean my upper body to grab Reykan’s tail with both hooves while I try not to move my lower body for fear that I might...unroll my tail. I place Reykan's tail over my rolled tail, forming an ‘x.’
...Right. Now for the tricky part; tying our tails... This...might take a while...
I let out an annoyed hiss as I ignore the weird feeling of my ass dragging a panther with me. Said panther is still asleep, snoring loudly as he sleeps on his back against the moving earth underneath. The edge of the forest is still a distance away, but at least I’m moving towards it. Shadows fly over me, and without stopping, I look up with squinted eyes to see a large flock of birds flying by.
...And then I hear a faint sound of thunder. I blink and turn my head towards the direction of the sound. Huh... There’s a very large and dark thunderstorm in the distance. I wonder if a pasture or two requested a storm? Why would anyone prefer a storm than rain?
Eh, whatever. That’s not my problem.