//------------------------------// // Gotta Go Fast(?) - Gotta Go Fast(!) // Story: Ynanhluutr // by Imploding Colon //------------------------------// Click! Cl-Click! Wildcard had cleared off all by two shelves. He now had four bulging bags full of platinum bars. The Syndicate's Stronghold shook, causing the Vault to shudder. The massive door slid closed with a pronounce groan. Gasping, the griffon flew over and stopped it from shutting with his metal hand. Exhaling with relief, he turned and waved his talon in Rainbow's direction. “I know... I know!” Rainbow frantically photographed sheet after sheet. “I just gotta get more! There's still some film left!” Wildcard rushed over. He grabbed a bunch of documents from beneath Rainbow Dash and shoved them into a bag, looking at her. “I'd love to! But we don't have much more room beyond the gold... er... platinum! Whatever!” She bit her lip. “How about... h-how about just the blueprints with the explosive plans?” Wildcard tapped one of the documents, pointing into the far right corner. “Whoah!” Rainbow grinned wide. “That is totally a hoof print! Way to go, dude!” She lifted the sheet in question, sneering victoriously. “Boss Revan... you're about to be demoted to Grunt Revan.” Wildcard stuffed the sheet into one of Rainbow's bags, then zipped it up. He held both filled satchels out to the mare. Rainbow turned around. “Load me up—” Her eyes bulged as her body sagged. “Luna poop!” Wildcard fastened one bag to her, and then the second. Rainbow found it hard to stand straight. She had to flap her wings just to tilt her body forward and avoid teetering over. “Holy squirrel turds...” Rainbow quivered, tail flicking. “You mean... we g-gotta lug this kind of a weight through the water?!” Wildcard paused, merely glaring at her. “Uhhhh... I mean... eheh...” She smoothed her bangs back. “No sweat! Not like I've got some hereditary debilitating muscular atrophy or some crud. Let's do this!” The griffon nodded. He backed out of the Vault in reverse, pushing the door open. Rainbow trotted after him as well as her heavy hooves could allow her. “Okay... the flood waters should be up to the third floor by now... or just about.” She paused to kick one of the thugs in the chin before he could fully wake up. WHAP! “Then we swim south, head for the surface, and climb onto one of the lower platforms.” Wildcard flung open the door of the supply room and rushed out. Rainbow galloped after him. “Then we meet up with Theanim, Echo, and your coltfriend at the Arrowfish and we all make like a tree and...” She skidded to a stop, eyes wide. “...poopy.” Three thugs were rushing up. “Hey! Guys! We need all able-bodied hooves downstairs to help with...” The trio froze in place, eyes squinting. “...the Hell?” “Uhhhhh...” Rainbow glanced aside. Neither she nor Wildcard were agile enough to get the drop on the thugs. Cl-Clakka! The foremost guard raised a crossbow. “I should have known! Mercenaries!” He gnashed his teeth. “The only way you're getting out of here is in a body bag!” Bard galloped with Echo down a flight of stairs. Once he was well past line of sight with Revan's office, he made for the front entrance. “Hopefully the others are havin' a far easier time than we are.” “Mrmmmfff... without a soundtrack, I'm sure,” Echo added. “Dayum, yer right. Heh... sucks to be them.” Echo rolled his slitted eyes. His body was jostled, suddenly. Frowning, he craned his neck to look past Bard's hat. “Hey, what gives? Did you run out of farts or...?” “Ermmm...” Bard chewed his lip, fidgeting uncontrollably. The door to the front entrance was open, but several thugs stood in the way. They spun around from their conversation, glaring up the steps at Bard. “You!” One pointed, trotting forward. “You're responsible for this, somehow! Where's the Boss?! Who's responsible for all the flooding?!” “Awwwwwww shoot.” Bard took a pensive step back. “Somethin' tells me even Whinny Nelson can't pacify these yokels...” “Did ya hear what I said, punk?!” The lead guard and all of his comrades brandished razor sharp blades and bludgeons. “What in the Hell did you do with Boss Revan?!” “Look, I know this might seem awfully suspicious-like, what with me haulin' flank down the steps with a bat pony on my flank and all—” “STOP STALLING!” The guard struck the bottom of the stairs, spilling sparks everywhere. “TALK!” “Now... uh... I got a good explanation for this and...” He blinked, feeling the weight of Echo peeling off of him. The weak, trembling sarosian strolled forward. “What in tarnation are ya doin', partner?” “Get behind me,” Echo muttered, glaring at the assembled crowd. “But—” “Behind me, sunshine,” Echo slurred. “And YOU!” The head guard snarled. He pointed angrily at Echo while he and his buddies strolled up the stairs. “You are the worst one of all! Couldn't do a single dayum job for the Syndicate if your life depended on—” “SHREE-EE-EE-EE-EE-EE-EE!!!” Echo's fangs showed as he lunged forward, muzzle gaping wide open. His throat undulated, and the air between him and the guards distorted in a violent, vaporous fashion. “Aaa-aa-aaaugh!” The frontmost guard clutched his ears as blood trickled out of two points in his skull. The thugs behind him were no less fortunate. Everypony fell into fitful spasms while the cone of intense noise did its damage. As soon as it began, Echo's outburst faded. The sarosian's eyes rolled back, and he teetered onto his flank. “Whoah, there!” Bard caught him, smiling. “Easy, buddy. Ya dun yelped them to a pulp!” “Unnngh...” Echo's head reeled. He rubbed his skull, wincing. “Not... s-so loud, asstits...” “How come ya didn't tell me ya could pull that trick off?” “It's not that useful of a trick, considering I can only do it once a day without fainting,” Echo grumbled. “Heh... no wonder ya ain't a hit with the fillies.” “Go cram it up your jizzhole,” Echo sputtered, holding his lunch in. “Mmmfnngh... are we out of here or what?” “And how!” Bard smirked, tossing Echo over his backside once again. “And thanks, y'all, for flyin' Migraine Airlines!” He galloped over the collapsed thugs, spread his wings, and flew out the door. Thirty seconds previous... “I should have known! Mercenaries!” Downstairs, the thug aimed his crossbow at Wildcard and Rainbow Dash. “The only way you're getting out of here is in a body bag!” Wildcard and Rainbow stood dead-still, helpless. Just then, a loud, ear-piercing howl wafted down the nearby stairwell from several floors above. “Grfff... augh!” The guards winced, as did Rainbow and Wildcard. The head thug with a crossbow turned around for one second too long. “What in the Hell is that?” His ears cleared just in time to hear the pitter-patter of talons. He looked straight forward— SCHLUNNNNK! A razor-sharp beak stabbed him between the eyes. “AAAAUGGHLKKKTT!” He stumbled backwards, bleeding profusely. “Verlaxion's Sleet!” One of the guards swung his blade at Wildcard. The griffon spun to the side. CLANK! He blocked the swing with his metal-filled saddlebag. WHUMP! He pounced on the guard and the two wrestled awkwardly. “Dammit all!” The last guard rushed towards his partner's aid. “Wildcard! Look out!” Rainbow galloped forward, but she couldn't compensate the weight of her saddlebag's contents. “Whoah—whoah!” She toppled forward uncontrollably. At the last second, she held her breath, and simply... rolled in a fuzzy blue ball. For better or for worse, Rainbow's weight body slammed into the last thug, knocking his hooves out from under him. The pegasus came to a stomp, bumping into Wildcard's opponent. “Gaaah!” The guard tripped backwards over Rainbow Dash, falling limply across his partner. Holding his breath, Wildcard flapped his wings, lifted up, and then came sailing down with the full weight of his stolen bars. WHUDDDD! All four talons landed in the guard's chest. The crushing blow was enough to yank the oxygen out of both thugs, and they fell unconscious—one piled atop the other. Rainbow Dash panted and panted. A metal talon reached down, and she used it to pull herself onto her hooves. “Well... better awkward than awesome, if it gets the job done, right?” Wildcard's goggles glinted. He spun and dashed down the nearest stairwell. Rainbow shrugged. “I'm gonna take that as an affirmative 'squawk'!” And she sped swiftly after him.