I blink.
It blinks back.
I rub my eyes, then look again.
It's still there.
Next I pinch myself, only to be rewarded with pain, this is no dream.
The horse cocks its head. "Are you alright?" it says. "You're acting a little strange."
Gingerly I outstretch my hand, and poke it on the nose.
"Boop!" it says cheerily. "Your turn!", It hops forward, landing on my midsection, pushing me down onto the pillow. "Boop!" it says again, touching my nose with its weird hoof thing.
"Wha..." is the only thing I can manage to say, before a knock at the door.
"Pinkamena, I can't find my hairbrush, mind if I borrow yours?" says Maud, walking in.
All I can do is nod mutely, my eyes darting between my sister and the pony thing sitting on my stomach.
"Thanks," she says, walking to my dresser. As she passes my bed she stops and looks at me, concern* evident on her face. "Are you alright, sister? You look a little pale."
Once more all I can do is nod.
I watch as she extends her hand, my eyes widening as it passes through the pony's head as if it wasn't there. She rests her palm on my forehead.
"You're feeling kind of cold," says Maud. "Let me get a thermometer."
I watch her walk out of the room. 'Her hand went right through it, what the hell's going on?' I think.
Suddenly I felt an uncomfortable feeling on my... chest. I look down to see it rubbing it's cheek on my exposed breasts.
"Wow these are soft," it says. "Like warm pillows,"
Severely regretting my decision to not wear a top, I push it off of me, once again sitting up, and try to give it my best death glare, however one factor made that rather difficult, 'Why did it have to be so fuzzy?'
"D-don't you dare," I say, trying to keep my voice clear and my face level.
It looks surprised for a minute, before giving a sly look. "You're ticklish, aren't you?" it says.
"No, of course not!" I say, regaining control of my face, though I subconsciously cover my breasts with my arm.
"Well... let's just see about THAT!" it exclaims, pouncing on my chest, knocking me prone and dislodging my arm. It then proceeds to blow a raspberry in a rather personal place.
"St-stop i-Ah-it" I cry, before my biting my lip, my shoulders shaking in repressed and unwanted giggles.
It lifts its head. "Not until I hear you laugh," it sings gleefully, before burying its snout yet again where it doesn't belong.
Mustering what little strength I have left, I grab it by the scruff of its neck, hoist it off of me, shoot out of bed and run to the door, before hurling it open and throwing the horse-thing out.
"Oof!" it exclaims, falling face first on the carpet. It picks itself up and faces me.
I stand there breathing heavily. "No" I say, before slamming the door.
After leaning on the door for a minute to regain my balance and steady my breath, I eventually stalk back to my bed and flop prone on the mattress, arms landing limply by my side.
'What the shit is happening, did I really just get freaking motorboated by a tiny horse?'
The door opens and Maud walks in with a first aid kit under her arms, she stops when she sees me lying like this. "Did you get out of bed?" she asks.
"No, just got hot under the covers is all," I lie, "You didn't see anything out in the corridor, did you?"
"No, why do you ask?" she says, placing the kit on my bedside, while reaching a hand out to feel my temperature.
"I just thought I heard something," I lie again. "Must have just been my imagination."
"Huh, no wonder you were getting stuffy, you're burning up," she says, the palm of her hand on my forehead.
'Gee I wonder why' I think, recalling the little incident.
"You're sweating too," she observes, "looks like a thermometer won't be needed."
"Why not?" I ask, confused.
"Because you are clearly running a fever," she states, redoing the clasps on the first-aid kit, "and that means bed-rest."
I start to protest, but Maud cuts me off. "No buts, you have a major temperature, I'll call the school in the morning, tomorrow you're having a lie in, now sleep," she says in her commanding tone*, as she pulls my covers up to my neck.
The more I think about it, the more Maud's words make sense. "You know, I think you're right," I say, suddenly very sleepy "I think I've been seeing things."
She cocks her head. "Oh, anything interesting?" she asks.
My eyes start to droop. "Just a tiny pink horse..." I say, sleepily.
"Goodnight Pinkamena," says Maud, before sleep claims me.
…
Beep-click
'Alarm's late again' I think.
My attempt to get up is immediately thwarted by a hand on my stomach.
"You're not going anywhere," Maud says flatly.
"You're up early," I state, matter-of-factly.
"Yes, but don't you think you are," she says.
"I feel fine Maud, my fever must have passed," I say, trying to sit up, but Maud's hand is still in place.
"You're not well until I say so," she says. "You're still running a slight temperature, and you were mumbling in your sleep."
I raise my eyebrow. "Have you been sitting there all night?" I ask.
"So, in short, you aren't going anywhere," she says, ignoring my question. "Now sit back and relax," she continues, once more using her commanding tone.*
Suddenly I fell limp to my bed, my strength to resist suddenly leaving me.
"How do you do that?" I say, annoyed by her uncanny ability to subdue me.
"Big sister secrets," she says playfully*.
"I've never heard of anyone else being able to paralyse their little sisters before, how come I can't do it to Marble or Limestone?" I ask.
"I'm still the eldest, so it doesn't count," she says, getting up. "You stay there and get some rest, I'll be back later with some breakfast."
She stops in the doorframe. "I wouldn't be so down on this, just consider it a day off with a legitimate excuse."
"Won't stop me from being bored out of my skull," I state grumpily.
Maud thinks for a moment, before saying, "How about this, I'll close the shop for the day and keep you company?"
"You can do that?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
She shrugs. "It's my shop, I don't see why not, family comes before business," she says.
"What would we even do?" I ask her.
"Oh, you know," she says, "Just relax and mess around for a bit, just like we used to."
With that she leaves me with my thoughts.
'So I guess it was just a fever then,' I think. 'I just imagined being indecently assaulted by a horse... I'm not sure if I should be happy about that or not.'
Regardless, I'm not keen on spending the rest of my day topless, so I hop out of bed and pad over to the wardrobe.
I haven't bound my chest today, nor can I really be bothered to, so I pick a particularly baggy shirt that is a few sizes too big for me. It was still a little snug around the chest, but it would have to do.
I take a moment to glance out the window into the early morning light. My mind drifts back to something Maud had said earlier.
'Just like we used to huh...'
"MOUSETRAP!" I shouted gleefully, as the colourful contraption finished its deployment, the cage falling on Maud's mouse. I then started skipping around the game board singing, "I win, I win!"
"Good job Pinkie, you got me good," said Maud, sitting opposite to me on the carpet.
"And to the victor goes the spoils!" I said, eyeing the little bits of cheese on Maud's side of the board. The game came with little cardboard bits of cheese, but we used real ones, it was more fun that way.
Maud passed her plate to me, and I started nibbling the little thin squares with gusto.
"Be careful, If you keep eating like that, you might turn into a mouse," said Maud.
"Squeak!" I said happily, before finishing the rest of the cheese. I then ran around the board and put both hands on Maud's shoulders "Can we play again, please can we, can we, Huh-huh-huh?!" I said while bouncing on the spot.
At this point Mommy walked in. "Sorry girls, it's time to go to bed."
"Oh come on Mommy, just a few more games!" I said running up to her and giving her my best watery eyes. "Please! Please!Please!Please!plea-" But my begging was cut short by Maud picking me up from behind and turning me to face her.
"Sorry Pinkie, You heard mom, It's time for sleep," she said.
I pouted. "But I'm not tired..." I said, moaning.
"Yes you are, Pinkie," said Maud in her commanding tone*.
I suddenly yawned and fell limp in her hands, and she rested my on her shoulder.
"Big sister powers, no faaaiir," I said sluggishly, my curly bangs drooping down over my equally droopy eyes.
"Thank you Maud, do you mind taking Pinkie up to bed while I clean up this mess?" said Mommy.
"Nuuuuuuuuu!" I said, my arms flailing weakly over Maud's shoulder.
"I'd be happy to, Mom," said Maud.
"Now there's my grown up little girl," said Mommy, bending over and giving Maud a kiss on the cheek. She turned to me, "Now you stay right in bed like a good girl and I'll be up in a minute to tuck you in and read you a story."
"Ok Mommy, love you," I said as she gave me a kiss on the forehead.
"Aawww! You were so adorable as a foal!" says the pink horse thing on the couch.
Wait, wha-
I spin on the spot.
The horse thing is back, sitting on the end of my bed, grinning. "Hiya! how was your night?"
As a response, I open the window, march up to the bed, pick up the horse thing under its forehooves, march back, and toss it out bodily. I then slam the window, stalk back to bed, and throw myself under the covers.
I wait for a minute.
"Well that was easy..." I say.
"But it wasn't very nice," says the horse thing.
I lift my head to see the horse thing sitting at the end of my bed again, only this time pouting up a storm.
"What did you do that for?" she says.
"My peace of mind," I say. "My fever is worse than I thought, I'm hallucinating in case you haven't noticed."
"That’s still no reason to throw me out the window," she says, giving me watery eyes.
"Maybe not, but indecent assault is a damn good one," I say angrily.
"Is that some sort of condiment?" she asks, confused.
"What the hell are you anyway? You're rather talkative for a fever dream," I say.
It giggles. "I'm Pinkie Pie silly, I told you last night, and I'm a 'she' not an it."
I frown. "I never called you an it."
"But you thought it," it chides.
"Al-right, listen here you horse thing..." I begin.
"I'm a pony," she interjected.
"Horse, pony, fever induced hallucination, whatever!" I exclaim, causing her to frown slightly. "What exactly do you want from me, or are you just something my mind conjured up to annoy me?"
She drew herself up, beaming with pride. "Like I said, I'm Pinkie Pie, another you from another place, and I'm here to help you rediscover your rainboom!"
"...What," I say, wearing a complete deadpan.
She looks off put for a moment, but then bounces back. "Well you see..." She takes a deep breath. "I'm like a different version of you from a different world full of ponies and dragons and griffons and cake and parties and over there I'm really happy with lots of friends but the me in this world which is you is really unhappy with no friends and that really made me sad so I said to myself Pinkie there is another you out there who needs your help and what kind of element of laughter would I be if I can't help myself so here I am and I'm gonna help you smile again and discover the magic of friendship!" It came out in a torrent.
Strangely enough I managed to follow all that.
"Soo, you're me?" I say.
"Eeyup!" she chirps.
"From another world?"
"Yeppers!"
"And you're here to help me make friends?" My eyebrow raises so high I'm afraid it might fly off my face.
"Isn't it great?" she says.
"And you got there how?" I ask, crossing my arms.
"On my hooves, silly," she says.
"And only I can see and touch you because...?" I ask.
"Wibbly wobbly," she says dismissively, waving a hoof.
"That’s a Doctor Who reference," I state, not impressed.
"Still true," she says.
I rest my forehead in the palm of my hand. "Or maybe," I say slowly, "You are not from a different world, you are just the bizarre product of my warped, fever ridden, and twisted imagination, in some strange attempt by my subconscious to emulate Charles Dickens' Christmas Carol with a pink pony."
"Maybe," she concedes, "whatever makes you comfortable, I'm not arguing." She shrugs, before frowning. "Who's Charles Dickens?"
"So exactly how do you plan to 'show me the magic of friendship'?" I air quote. "What visions of wonder and whimsy do you intend to show me, or should I just be violently sick and save you the trouble." I make no attempt to hide my sarcasm.
If she notices my tone, she doesn't comment, instead she says, "I don't need to do anything like that silly!"
"So what are you going to do then?" I ask, getting fed up with this.
"I'm not going to show, you friendship, I'm gonna be your friend! That way you can learn for yourself!" she gleefully exclaims.
It might be the fever, or the sheer strangeness of the situation, but for the first time in years, I find myself at a complete loss for words.
"And wha... And what if I don't want to be your friend?" I finally say.
She just grins even harder. "Well too bad! Because I'm gonna be your friend anyway, so you better get used to it!"
I open my mouth to retort, but then there is a knock on the door.
"Oh that must be your breakfast, I'll leave you to it, seeya tomorrow!" and with that, she jumps off and slips under the bed.
I quickly peer under, though I see nothing but a few boxes. Sighing, I get out of bed and go to open the door.
Maud was standing there with a tray held on both hands, it had a small pot and two empty mugs on it.
"Sorry, I couldn't open the door," she says. "I brought soup."
"I can see that," I say, before letting her in.
She sets down the tray on the floor next to my bed, before sitting down and indicating that I sit opposite. Wrapping my doona around me, I do so. She then starts ladling the soup into the two mugs.
"I've left a sign on the door, I won't be opening up the shop today," she states.
"You don't have to, you know," I say, "You don't need to look after me like this."
"I don't, but I want to," she says, looking me square in the eyes. "I can run my business any day of the week, but I don’t get to spend as much time with my little sister as I would like, so that’s what I'm doing now. That is, if you'll let me," she adds as an afterthought.
"Sure I guess, I've had quite enough of my own company this morning, but what will we even do?" I say, slightly taken aback.
She thinks for a minute, before reaching under the bed and pulling out a box.
"Cluedo?" she asks, presenting the box.
I sigh again. "Fine, but I'm Colonel Mustard..."