//------------------------------// // Ending 3: I'm A What Now! // Story: Satisfaction Guaranteed // by Zurvan //------------------------------// Ending 3: I’m a what now? By: TheGreatEater Suddenly Scootaloo started to vibrate faster than Pinkie Pie on a concentrated, liquid sugar bender. Cracks forming around her body and a bright strobing light pulsating from her. Flim, Flam and Trixie looked at one another in shock just as Scootaloo blew up leaving behind a filly shaped scorch mark on the ground. “B-what!? We didn’t have anything that could explode in there, and why does everything smell like tree sap now?” Trixie asked.          “I don’t know, but I’m more worried about the flying angry mob that’s around us at the moment,” Flim replied. “Well it’s been a pleasure knowing you both, and since we’re going to die anyways,” Flam said before bursting into green flames, “We’re both changelings.” “Well no use hiding it,” Flim replied before changing as well. Looking up at the myriad of insanely angry ponies above them. Too think that I had the best free love in all of Equestria, and this was going to be our best act of Love Collecting to date … at least that wasn’t us trolling Equestria while doing it. Good bye Trixie, you were the best love I’ve ever tasted … had … what evs. It was nice knowing you before getting killed by ravage ponies. At least this can’t get anyworse..          “Ummm … I know we’re going to die. Horribly, but still when you’re inner monologuing isn’t inner monologuing when everypony can hear you. But still in a creepy way that was almost romantic,” Trixie responded as the flying ponies of death hovered around them. *** Scootaloo hovered in a sea of stars. It was quite beautiful if you were to ignore the throbbing headache that she was experiencing. Just as she was about to come to grips that she died.  Celestia appeared before her, “Oh! Hello my little pony how’d you enter here?” “I blew up,” Scootloo replied still in shock. “Blew up?” “Uhuh.” “As in keplow-splosions of fiery death?” “Yep. I drank a potion that let non-pegasi fly. I tried it, and went boom.” “Oh … well … this is interesting,” Celestia replied completely flummoxed. “So this is where ponies go when they die? It looks pretty,” Scootaloo mumbled. “Well that’s what’s interesting. You aren’t dead,” Celestia responded. “But … the massive explosiony death of filly sized proportions?” Scootaloo asked giving Celestia the most adorable puppy dog eyes that were ever gazed upon. “Yes … that might complicate things. Well you see … Scootaloo was it?” Celestia replied with a raised eyebrow. “How’d you know?” “Well I’ve seen you a few times in Canterlot, and Rainbow Dash has mentioned you a few times in her Friendship Reports.” “Really!?” Scootaloo shouted, her tiny wings buzzing in pure joy. “Yes really,” Celestia giggled, “But Scootaloo, this is where ponies go not to die. But to become Alicorns.” “So I’m going to be a Princess?” “Yes, now-” That’s all Scootaloo needed to hear before she started bouncing around ecstatically, shooting a thousand questions a second at Celestia whose ears flattened at the onslaught. “Does that mean I can fly? Can I move the moon too now? Do all Alicorns burst into flames or only Twilight? Do I get super powers? Can I shoot laser beams out of my eyes? What about banishing my enemies into the bowels of the earth to get eaten by mole ponies? Do I still have a bed time? -” Celestia put her hoof on Scootaloo’s muzzle to silence her and in her usual cryptic way replied, “All  will be revealed shortly. Now let’s see, where to send you back?” Opening her stalker mirror, she peeped on to two Changelings cowering behind Trixie as the entire town of Ponyville was about to set onto them with great fury, “Well there looks good. Now to give you your princessly powers.” With that she booped Scootaloo on the nose as her inner magic popped out of her and wrapped her in it’s magical bubble. Great, now there’s another princess. Now me and Luna can finally take a Vacation, and I’ll teach Scootaloo about princessing when I get back … Better yet. Since Twilight will be ruling with her, I can tell Twilight it’s a test. She’d love it. Wow! I’m such a nice pony. ***         Celestia appeared before the mob before they could enact their vengeance and add said in a loud tone, “Worry not my little ponies,” before looking at the Changelings, “and you two.         “For Scootaloo isn’t dead. She is in fact Equestria’s newest Princess!” Pointing out to the sky they saw a violet light descend from the sky, and as they saw their newest princess, Celestia summoned Luna who was still sleeping and wearing her adorable opossum onesie that Celestia bought her last Hearth’s Warming.   As the crowd cheered, Luna woke up and seeing where she was gave Celestia a glare that burned with the fury of a thousand fluffy pillows. It would be more threatening, but Luna looked to adorable to be intimidating at the moment. Leaning in Celestia whispered, “We got a new princess, go over to Twilight’s castle and wait for me there. I have a surprise for us both that you’re going to like. I promise.” “But Tia!” Luna moaned in a hushed tone, “Did you need to embarrass us by teleporting us in our most favorite onesie? This is private!” “Oh, don’t worry. Everyone will think you’re utterly adorable. Now go along, and don’t forget, I love you,  Little Lulu Gumdrops.” “Pffft! We haven’t been called that since we were a foal.” Luna huffed before relenting, “But we love you too. But we still will have our vengeance.” “And I’m sure it’ll be lovely.” Celestia retorted playfully. Celestia trotted over to the Changeling Trolls and Trixie, “Well this is quite an interesting potion, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to confiscate it. Although you shall be reimbursed.” “But … um your majesty … this has been our first legitimate show … um product since ever. What’ll we do now?” Trixie asked in a shaky bow. “Whatever do you mean? I thought being promoted to the head of whatever court Scootaloo forms would be a good enough?” Celestia replied with a dark chuckle. “What?” All three asked. “Well you were responsible for her ascension … even if it could have gone much worse if you had picked the golden pickledillies just a moon later. So it’s only fair that you be there for her in this new chapter in her life,” Celestia said. That and it’ll be funny to see what chaos you lot stir in that stuff old castle of ours. Oh I sure hope Discord isn’t listening in. Last time I was thinking about causing chaos he did a spit take that flooded Yakistan in Ricotta cheese. To think the Yaks still think that, their snow is actual snow even a few thousand years later. Rather than frozen cheese. I just don’t have the heart to tell them.         “Thank you your highness,” Flamling buzzed.         “Well anywho I must be off. Head over to Canterlot on the morrow, and you’re positions will be ready for you.” ***         Scootaloo rode into Twilight’s castle on Celestia’s back grinning from ear to ear. She didn’t know what being a princesses was all about, or what she was going to be princesses of. But still not many ponies could brag they rode Celestia after becoming an alicorn from a potion induced explosion. Although the number of ponies who could brag about riding Celestia at all were very few indeed to begin with.         Although it was kind of boring watching her write all those stuffy looking letters that she teleported to wherever it was that Celestia teleports her stuff to. Which Scootaloo was disappointed to hear wasn’t her secret lair, or the room she hides her toys, or the room where she gets all of her cake from. Scootaloo did find it funny that a pony would blush so hard at having a toy room. After all Scootaloo, even being as mature and big a pony as she was still had a special place for all her toys that she liked playing with … even though she’d deny to anypony but her friends. I’ll ask Twilight later why Celestia is so embarrassed about having a secret toy room? She’s a smart pony. I bet she knows everything!         She was shaken from her inner musings by a shout and a loud explosion. Followed by a rather disheveled Twilight stumbling out into the foyer. Scootaloo snickered, “Twilight, you’re already a princess.”         Twilight blushed, “I know … I was just curious.”         “And?” Celestia asked.         “I didn’t become a super princess, I burped an explosive ball of rainbows and glitter.”         “Well I know what to give Luna tonight before she goes to sleep. Where is she anyways?”         “Oh she’s lurking about. Something about being mad at the indignation of being seen as adorable rather than as a Princess of the Night.”         “I’m not lurking. Anyways now that you’re here. What is the surprise you told us about?”         “Oh that! Well …” Taking off her crown and setting it on Twilight’s head, and summoning Luna’s and plopping it on Scootaloo’s she said, “Congratulations for the next month you two will be ruling princesses of Equestria, and I task you Twilight to teach Scootaloo everything about being a princess. Now me and Luna are going on a vacation,” she said while teleporting a giant beach umbrella.         “Tia? What’s a vacation?”         “Oh it’s where you don’t have to work for a while.”         “I’m sorry, but I still don’t get it? There’s such a thing as no work?”         “Yep! Well tootles! And don’t worry, I got new staff members for Scootaloo they’ll meet you in Canterlot tomorrow.”         Picking up Luna and holding her tight she yelled, “Princesses away!” With that ancient chant said the wind picked up and carried Celestia away letting her ride the umbrella like a Braytish nanny.                  “Sooo … Twilight, did you know Celestia has a secret toy room?” Double Innuendo for the win!