//------------------------------//
// Tanks For The Memories 
// Story: Responses To A Disgruntled Friendship Student 
// by keaton-furman-prower 
//------------------------------//

Original letter here.





Dear  Rainbow Dash:

You did pretty well for your first time trying to sabotage an entire season. Do you mind if I join you next time? I could teach you some of my favorite tricks!

Sincerely, The Grinch.





Dear Tank:

At least your master loves you. Mine just drags me around while bitching about how much he hates the whos and their Christmas carols and whatnot.

Sincerely, Max.





Dear Twilight Sparkle:

Tell those stupid inbred ponies to get their act together. A town that shifts its seasons whenever they want to is not a town that will be seen positively by the general populace.

…Or don’t. Canterlot will look good in comparison if you keep screwing up.

Sincerely, Princess Celestia.





Dear Dad:

You dumped me at an orphanage so you could become a pro hockey player?!

…I really hate you right now.

Your eternally-resentful daughter, Scootaloo.

P.S.: I hope you enjoy your father’s day present. It’s a box full of twittermites trained to attack anything that smells like you.