//------------------------------// // A Nightmare // Story: The Price of a Smile // by Trick Question //------------------------------// Twilight Sparkle felt very tired. The sun had set less than an hour ago, but she hadn't slept last night, and as far as she could tell from the calendar, 'last night' might also have been 'several days ago'. She had nodded off on the trip to Canterlot, but that gave her at most two or three hours of rest. Yet even within the soft, relaxing hug of a king-sized canopy bed in the castle's palatial guest suite, she couldn't quiet her mind. After a maddening hour of edgy wakefulness, Twilight gave up and swallowed the sleeping pills that Princess Luna had left for her. She barely made it under the covers before the darkness claimed her. When Twilight came to, she was lying facedown in the dirt of a barren scrubland. Princess Luna stood beside her, and offered her a hoof up. Twilight stood up, coughed, and took a moment to dust herself off. "What... what is this?" asked Twilight. "You must tell me. It is your dream, and your memory," said Princess Luna. Twilight looked around. The pair of alicorns stood from a high vantage point, looking down upon Appleloosa. The sun was at its zenith, and it was a very hot day. "I remember this. It's the day when we negotiated the trade deal between one of the buffalo tribes and the Appleloosans. But, something's wrong," said Twilight. She looked down at her coat, her hooves, the dirt. She picked up some dust and rubbed it between her hooves. It was dirty, of course, but somehow it was too dirty. "What is it?" asked Luna. "Princess, this is a dream? Somehow this feels far more real than when I'm awake," said Twilight. "The texture, the imagery, the smells, my voice, dear Celestia, even my hooves! The detail is, I mean it's just, completely overwhelming my senses, I can barely think—" "Yes, my apologies. It has been quite a while since you last had your true senses," said Luna. "It will take some time for you to reacclimate." "Luna, what is wrong with me? Are my senses being dulled by some kind of magic? Is everypony in Equestria like this?" asked Twilight. "Correct. Your senses are dulled, and everypony you know is in the same situation. But I think it is more important, at the moment, for us to watch your dream unfold," said Luna. She then pointed to a large dust cloud in the distance, one quickly encroaching upon the village. Twilight could clearly see the enormous buffalo that constituted the stampede. She could make out Appleloosan citizens, as well, most of them lying on the roofs of buildings with guns cocked and ready. Guns? What were those? She struggled to remember. Then, a familiar voice caught her attention. A dozen hooves distant stood another Twilight Sparkle and her five dearest pony friends. They didn't seem to be aware of the dreamers' presence. None of them were smiling, not even Pinkie Pie, who currently wore an obnoxiously sexual burlesque outfit that made Twilight feel very uncomfortable in a way she didn't understand. Fluttershy was off to the side by herself, in a fetal position, softly crying. "We've failed, girls," said the other Twilight. "I'm sorry." "Bucking Tartarus, Twilight," said an angry-looking Applejack. "I should be down there right now, ready to fight and die alongside my kin! We should all be down there. This is a bunch of horseshit," she said, then snorted inward and spat a thick wad of mucus onto the dusty ground in front of her. "We're here on official business, AJ," the other Twilight said, her voice very tired. "We represent the diarchy, and we're not permitted to take sides in contested territory. Besides, it's not exactly a fair fight. We all know who's about to win." "The buffalo don't deserve this," said Rainbow Dash. "They were here first, no matter what the score is now." "And they don't understand our concept of property rights," said Rarity. "It's not like they're trying to commit a crime by using this area for religious purposes." "Fine! I know! It's just a steaming pile of bullcrap, alright?" shouted Applejack. "Nopony's in the wrong, and ponies on both sides gonna die anyhow. Fuck this day, just—" Applejack winced as she bit down hard on her tongue. Twilight couldn't remember what some of those words meant, but they gave her a frightening chill. Pinkie Pie approached Applejack and tried to comfort her. Applejack shoved her face-down into the ground without looking. "Twilight, why do we need to be here anymore?" said Pinkie, picking herself up off the ground and backing away from the group. "Nopony wants to see this." "We have to see it. Somepony on the outside of this battle needs to remember what happened on this day," said the other Twilight. "Do you think I want to watch ponies die? Besides," she said, with a deep sigh, "if something actually does go wrong, I'm not about to stand here and watch everypony in Appleloosa be massacred. If the tide swings the wrong way, we intervene and save as many villagers as we can, law be damned." "Thank you, Twilight," said Applejack. "Hay! What about saving the buffalo?" said Rainbow Dash. "Anypony give a shit about their lives? These are not 'bad' ungulates! They were peaceful before any of this territorial crap went down!" "We all care about the buffalo, Dash. They'll stop aggressin' just as soon as a couple gone down," said Applejack. "I mean, they just got to. They ain't no match for firearms, they'd be crazy not to see it." Pinkie Pie walked over to Fluttershy and cuddled up against her. "I'm not going to watch with you, Twilight. I'm sorry." "It's okay," said the other Twilight. "This is my burden. None of you girls need to see this." "It's our burden," said Rainbow Dash. She reached out a hoof to Applejack. Applejack growled at Dash for a moment, then sighed and bumped hooves. "Our burden," she confirmed. Rarity stepped back a ways, then walked over to Pinkie and Fluttershy. "I don't think I can bear to watch either, ladies. Oh Celestia, save us all," she whispered. The thundering dust cloud drew close to the village. The first shot rang out. A loud bellowing noise sounded, the dust cloud parted, and then things became a chaotic blur. Several buildings were butted hard, and two collapsed entirely. Buffalo were dropping to the ground left and right. The sounds were terrible. There were bellows from the buffalo, screams from the stallions and mares, and crying foals who could not be soothed. One pony hung like a trophy from a buffalo tusk; several others were trampled into broken shells. Even though they watched from a great distance, the carnage was clear and obvious. The streets on one side of the city were already stained red. That's interesting, thought the true Twilight Sparkle. Ponies and buffalo bleed the exact same color. Then her knees buckled and she retched across a wide patch of dirt. "Stop it, please, STOP IT!" she screamed in a raspy voice, and Luna mercifully complied. The two alicorns stood in an empty area with a white marble floor and a deep blue, sunless sky. Twilight immediately collapsed onto the floor. Her body was still too detailed, so she closed her eyes. But she could hear the sound of her blood pumping as it raced through her ears; she could feel the pain of her stomach, even though the vomit was only a dream; she could sense her joints aching as her hooves ground against the smooth, cool surface of the marble. Worst of all, she could still remember every horrid little detail of what she had just witnessed. "I am deeply sorry for your pain," said Luna, and Twilight felt the other pony nosing gently against her throat. Slowly Twilight stood, and she gasped as she felt Luna's warm embrace. It was surprising, and somehow very strange, but it helped to clear her mind. They held one another for what seemed like minutes. Then, Twilight felt Luna kissing at her neck, and her mind whirled with confusion and strange feelings that had no precedent in her memory. Luna began to pull gently back on Twilight's mane with a hoof, and she licked along her jawline in a long, wet stroke. Overwhelmed and confused, Twilight shoved Luna away. Princess Luna released her grip and stepped back. She sighed and waited patiently beside Twilight until the poor mare finally had the strength to speak. "Explain," said Twilight, between gasps of air. "The earlier memories you have from your time in Ponyville, and most of your memories going back from then, even into foalhood, have been retouched, in a manner of speaking. Your recollections have been made softer, gentler. More beautiful. Happier," said Luna. Not exactly what I meant by 'explain', thought Twilight, but she wasn't in the right frame of mind to argue. "I can't believe this. That was real?" said Twilight. She sat back down against the hard marble surface. "Yes. That was the true memory. How do you remember it?" asked Luna. "It's ridiculous," said Twilight, as the truth came into focus. "I actually remember a pie fight. I mean, that makes no sense whatsoever, right? I can't believe it. I just never stopped to think about it. Can you even imagine? My heavenly Sun. A bucking pie fight. I thought we solved a violent crisis between two groups at war by having them throw pies at each other. I feel so foalish." "Good. Now you can see a fraction of the innocence you would be sacrificing," said Luna. "It's too late. I already know what's going on," said Twilight. Princess Luna said nothing, but raised a brow. "There have been no citizen births anywhere in Equestria over the past two months. Our races are dying out, and you do nothing," accused Twilight. "The Visitors are able to rework living memories as well as old memories, so nopony notices." Luna sighed. "Princess, you continue to surprise me in the most pleasant of ways. You are, of course, entirely correct. However, I have reason to believe these 'Visitors' of which you speak are not trying to destroy us. It is my steadfast hope that there will be more births, after a time." "Your hope?" said Twilight. Princess Luna simply nodded. "I know this is hard, but surely you can see that I am trying to protect you." Twilight sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Look. I'm overwhelmed, and yes, that nightmare experience was as terrible as anything I can imagine, but I can handle it. I can take this. I will be able to handle all of this emotionally, at some point, someday. I want to remember, even the bad things, and I want to do it now. I want to know who, or what, is making me forget. And I will do anything to stop these beings from destroying Equestria." Luna frowned. "I appreciate that you are willing to risk anything to save Equestria, but will you risk throwing your life away just to share the burden of knowing about the supposed threat? There is no guarantee you will be able to do anything to return things to the way they were, and perhaps there is even a moral question about whether one should." "I need to know, Princess Luna," said Twilight, rubbing her eyes. The tears weren't stopping. "I just need to." "I understand. However, I must give you one final word of caution, Princess Twilight Sparkle," said Luna. "This memory of your past only scratches the surface. I have shown you nothing of how this memory has been modified, nor how things have changed in your life over the past year. Even if I restored all of your tainted memories to perfect clarity—which alone could be devastating—you would still know nothing of the real truth from which I am yet trying to protect you!" Princess Luna bowed down before Twilight Sparkle, and looked up to her with pleading eyes, as though begging for her own life. For the briefest moment, Twilight felt sorry for Luna. "You're saying there's something even worse than having memories like this?" said Twilight, her face aghast. "I can't even imagine." "Worse? I cannot judge that," said Luna. She stood up again, but her expression remained forlorn. "But there is much more to your situation than a few altered memories and life in a sensory fog, and very little of the truth is pleasant. Do you really want to travel to a world where this makes sense? Are you not happy where you are?" asked Luna. Her face was sad, but almost false, like an actor reading through an emotional script for the fortieth time. "You already know my answer," whispered Twilight. Luna sighed. "Of course. Very well. Return to Ponyville and say your goodbyes. You shall not see your friends again for quite some time, and when next you do, I fear it will be your intent to spread this disease among them. Then again, perhaps not. We shall see." "And after I return?" asked Twilight. "You should prepare a cover story to keep you from the public eye, like an illness. One week from the evening of your departure to Ponyville, you shall go to sleep as you normally do. During that sleep, your body shall simply disappear. Then we shall meet," said Luna. "I don't want to wait another week," said Twilight. "I need the time to prepare our meeting, so that it will be safe and secure," said Luna. "There must be zero chance of error in this matter. I knew this was coming, but I foalishly chose to hold out hope that you might change your mind." Twilight nodded. "So, seriously, I'll just disappear in my sleep?" she asked. Princess Luna nodded. "Yes. It is by far the safest way. You already know that I have great command over the realm of dreams. No Visitors must detect our meeting under any circumstance." "Right, I'm just a little shocked you can bridge the gap to the material world that easily. Although now that I think about it, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised you've been holding back on your powers," said Twilight. "Do I need to pack anything, or is that even possible?" "I fear it is not. Your choice has been made, Twilight Sparkle. All you must do now is wait, and say your goodbyes," said Princess Luna. The dream faded into peaceful darkness, and Twilight's mind gratefully followed. Upon waking, Twilight Sparkle dried her eyes in the real world, and then stepped into the shower. If only somepony could cheer her up from this. Pinkie Pie could do it. Pinkie and Pinkie alone could bring a smile back to her face, even from this. Thank goodness for Pinkie Pie, thought Twilight. Even that simple thought improved her mood. As Twilight nervously tried to scrub the invisible dirt out of her cartoonish-looking pelt, she realized that Princess Luna's parting words had finally addressed her as Twilight Sparkle informally, without using her title. Twilight had assumed being treated like a friend by Luna would feel pleasant, but the experience was unsettling. It was something about the way she said Twilight's name. It meant something. She couldn't quite put her hoof on what. Dark thoughts would occupy her throughout the train ride home.