//------------------------------// // Mission: ??? Dark Promise // Story: Adventures of Diamond Dancer (Mission Logs) // by RarityEQM //------------------------------// Personal log...This is my hardest mission. I don't think I'm gonna be able to complete this one. I won't give up though. I am jolted awake by my own body. See, Icarus Syndrome sometimes feels the need to let me know it's still stalking through my veins, pushing me to an early grave. Sometimes I can ignore it- pretend that I'm just a normal filly with another birthday coming up. Some days; like today, it reminds me my time is borrowed, and there's nothing I can do to change that. My body is twisted and tangled underneath me and I can see sunlight streaming through the windows of my room. I work the night shift, of course, so I sleep during the day. I figure it's maybe 3 pm...or if you're a regular pony, it's 3 am. Whichever. It doesn't matter. If I were able to feel temperature, I'm sure I'd be feverish. But since I can't, the only way I can tell things are bad is by the thick pool of sweat I'm laying in. Ick. Icarus Syndrome won't let me forget I'm it's slave. Today it reminds me in spades. I'm only awake for a few moments before my body lurches forward, and I puke helplessly into my bed. Brownish, greenish bile that ripples through my frame and pools on the covers. Ugh. I try to call for Bardigan, my big brother. I need him. Whenever I'm scared and things start to turn dark, he's always there to cheer me right up. But before I can get his name out of my mouth, I throw up again. Harder this time, my body seizing up and twisting around itself while my stomach empties itself onto my bed. No no no...I fall to the floor, trying to make my way to the bathroom. If I'm going to throw up, I need to do it in the toilet. But I only make it a few steps before I'm paralyzed again- vomiting profusely onto the floor. By now I've got nothing left to expel, so I'm just dry heaving and my stomach is cramping in on itself. "No...No more...Please no more..." I beg my own body. Please, please, please no more. I just need to get to the- I throw up again. Now I can't breathe. My throat is closing in on itself, my frame shuddering and I gasp for air. I'm sure if I were a normal girl, I'd be cracking my own ribs with how hard my body was fighting to destroy itself, but I can't feel anything anyway. I drag myself across the hall way and into the bathroom. By now my body won't respond to my commands anymore. I'm so tired...I'm so so so tired...I just want to sleep, but my body lurches again, twisting me onto my back and doing it's best to heave my stomach right out of my throat. I can't breathe again, gasping and choking on my own tongue. My eyes water up. I'm dying. I know I'm dying, and there's nothing I can do about it. I hack and cough and gasp. For a brief, flickering second, I can see my own feathers, floating there above my head. At first I don't know whats going on- am I upside down somehow? No. No. Icarus Syndrome is causing my feathers to fall out. Frail and fragile, not strong and dependable. They drift lifelessly to the ground while my body seizes in another dry heave. My feathers. My beautiful, beautiful feathers. Whats a pegasus without feathers?! Why does this have to happen to me?! Whatever I did wrong, I'm sorry already! PLEASE!!! Another lurch. Another horrible dry heave. I can feel bile oozing through my nose. I can't breathe! I can't call for help! Luna, somepony, ANYPONY!! After an eternity, my lungs finally stop seizing up, and I can breathe again. Ragged, gasping breaths, doing my best to suck air in through my nose. The episode is passing. I can breathe again. I'll live for another day, even though my body is reminding me to cherish the time. Each day, things will get worse and worse, though. Each day more feathers fall out, and it gets a little bit harder to fly. Laying on the bathroom floor, looking up at the ceiling, seeing the brightest, whitest stars in my eyes. My vision is swimming. The air tastes so sweet in my rancid lungs, and I can't stop myself from crying. This is my fate. The fate of the Miracle Mare. The Fantastic Filly. The Impossible Pony. My own body shuts down on itself and sentences me to a pathetic, sobbing demise. I try to roll myself onto my tummy. No. No I don't want to die like this. I don't want to submit to this sickness!! Of course...I don't have a choice. It's killing me. Slowly. Methodically. Shutting down my insides one part at a time. It's already robbed me of my beautiful silver coat. My sense of taste, touch and smell. My ability to fly properly. My dignity. It's taking everything from me, and it won't stop until it leaves me a hollow shell of my former self. Of course... Thats where Princess Luna comes in. Thats why I love her so much. She's the only one that can save me. Her and her dark promise. Why do you think Luna sends me on so many terrible missions? No little girl should ever have to fight the monsters she sends me to face. No little girl would survive half the missions I'm sent on. The guards in Canterlot Castle all hate me. They can't understand why Princess Luna would adopt a little ten year old with a terminal disease into the Night Court. They can't understand why the Princess would send a filly on dangerous suicide missions. They can't understand that it won't be Icarus Syndrome that kills me. It won't be this disease that finally ends my story. It won't be this debilitating sickness. It will be my loyalty to Princess Luna. And her dark promise that will finally close my book. And I couldn't be happier.