“Fleur, Fancy Pants!” Rarity said as her friends disembarked from the train. “Let me be the first to welcome you to Ponyville!”
The two unicorns smiled as they joined Rarity on a side of the platform away from the other disembarking passengers. Fleur Dis Lee was quick to exchange hugs and cheek kisses with their host. Fancy Pants settled for one kiss just above her extended hoof. Rarity's smile turned dazzling. She gestured to the two ponies standing nearby.
“I believe you've already met Pinkie Pie and Twilight Sparkle. Girls, these are my good friends—”
Rarity was cut off as Pinkie Pie let out a huge squeal of excitement and thrust her face to within inches of Fleur Dis Lee's.
“Oh my gosh, you look just like a princess!” Pinkie Pie gushed. “I mean, not like Twilight but just like Celestia and Cadance and Luna! Twilight's kind of the odd pony out there but she only just became a princess so maybe she'll grow into it. Twilight, are you going to be this hot in a few years? Ooh, I need to start planning a “Twilight went from a cute nerd to sexy librarian pa—”
“Pinkie!” Twilight and Rarity shouted at exactly the same time. Blue and purple magic surrounded the perky party pony and pulled her back to a more polite distance. Rarity turned to her guests, horribly embarrassed.
“I'm so sorry!” she said in a rush. Pinkie Pie can sometimes be a bit… excitable.”
Fleur Dis Lee laughed, a sound like the pell of a bell. “It's quite alright. Believe me, this is nothing compared to how creepy ponies in the modeling biz get.”
She gave Pinkie Pie a tolerant smile. “I've been told I'm as pretty as a princess before, but never by somepony who has met all three—” she broke off, looked at Twilight and blushed before continuing, “All four. It's quite the compliment.” She winked as she said that last part.
“Oh you totally are!” Pinkie Pie said cheerfully. She looked thoughtful and rubbed at her chin. “Except maybe Cadance. That mare's flank just doesn't quit! I don't know how Shining Armor manages to do anything all day except plow that—”
The magic that clamped Pinkie Pie's mouth shut this time was all Twilight’s. Fancy Pants spoke up just as Pinkie Pie stopped trying to talk through her closed muzzle.
"I fear I'm the only pony here who doesn't know the town. Fleur dear, didn't you say you had family nearby?"
Fancy Pants' polite question managed to do what Pinkie Pie's mouth could not: make Fleur Dis Lee uncomfortable.
"Yes, I suppose you could say that," she said a little too quickly. "I haven't seen them in some time."
She turned to their host, clearly not wanting to continue that line of conversation. "Rarity, thank you again for offering us a place to stay."
Rarity grimaced. "About that," she began. "I'm afraid there's been an accident at the Boutique in my guest room."
Fancy Pants cocked an eyebrow. "An accident rendering it unsuitable for habitation, I gather?" he asked.
"Something like that," Rarity said, her cheeks flushing. "Cutie Mark Crusaders Gastric Surgeons."
Fancy Pants started to say something but Rarity raised a hoof. "Don't ask," she said firmly. "Just...don't ask."
Fancy Pants opened his mouth, closed it and thought for a moment. "Well then," he said finally.
"You're welcome to stay at the palace, but most of the rooms I don't use still aren't furnished and that includes the spare bedrooms." Twilight chimed in.
"I'm still surprised you haven't at least set up one for Spike," Rarity chided.
Twilight rolled her eyes. "He'll get tired of setting that basket up on his throne sooner or later.
Fancy Pants chuckled. "I'm sure we can find something. If nothing else I have a business associate in town who would be happy to host us for a few days."
Twilight raised an eyebrow as they left the train station. "Just like that?"
Fancy Pants' eyes twinkled. "He'd pay for the opportunity if I was crass enough to ask. Now then. What do you have planned for today, princess?"
Twilight's excitement at the word 'planned' was enough to overpower her knee-jerk response to the use of her title. She smiled just widely enough to straddle the line between joy and mental illness as she conjured up a checklist.
"I'm glad you asked! Rarity and I came up with a detailed itinerary—"
Rarity coughed delicately.
Twilight blushed. "That is, we came up with a list of suggested sights and activities. You're probably hungry, which is why lunch is the first thing in the list."
Twilight beamed proudly for a moment before continuing, "Rarity suggested several—"
"I could do with some hay fries," Fleur Dis Lee cut in abruptly.
Fancy Pants nodded in agreement. "I haven't had a good hay burger in the longest time."
Rarity looked surprised. Twilight gave her a smug look. "I know just the place," the purple princess sang.
†
"So then I looked at her and said, 'That's not my pen, darling."
Everypony at the table burst out laughing. Pinkie Pie in particular collapsed into a giggle fit that drowned out Fleur Dis Lee's snort and Rarity's scandalized titter. Pinkie Pie clapped the supermodel unicorn on the back as she struggled to regain control
"He's amazing, Fleur! I can totally see why you'd want to charm his pants off!"
That shut everypony up. Pinkie Pie looked around the suddenly silent table. "What?"
"Pinkie..." Twilight began before settling for a sigh and a facehoof.
Rarity looked a little dazed at the social faux pas bombardment the day was developing into. "Fleur," she said in a weak voice. "I'm so terribly sorry—"
Fleur Dis Lee burst out laughing. "Oh sweet Celestia," she managed as she shook with mirth. "I can see why the Princess thought you all were the right ponies to liven up the Gala!"
Pinkie Pie laughed along with her. Rarity nearly melted into her chair in relief and Fancy Pants was clearly struggling to keep a straight face as the tension drained away from the table. By the time Fleur Dis Lee subsided enough to begin wiping the tears from her eyes the verbal hand grenade seemed well and truly dodged.
"How did you know why Princess Celestia invited us to the Gala?" Twilight asked. All eyes turned to her. "She didn't even tell me until afterward at Donut Joe's."
Fleur Dis Lee froze. "She, well, I'd heard—"
"So Rarity, how is Applejack these days?" Fancy Pants asked a little too loudly.
Rarity seized on the question like the last life preserver on the Mactanic. "She didn't waste a minute signing up for the first rodeo she could find when we got back from Canterlot," Rarity said. She chuckled and added, "Can you believe that she insisted on donning that Stetson of hers the moment our train left the station?"
"But how did you—" Twilight began.
"Twilight darling, don't be rude," Rarity chided. She winked at Fleur Dis Lee. "A lady never betrays her sources for certain tidbits."
"But I just want to know—" Twilight tried again.
"A rodeo you say?" Fleur Dis Lee asked over the curious princess. "Is that what the stadium we saw being set up on the ride in was for?"
"The very same," Rarity confirmed. "Apparently there were some safety issues and parts of the old ring had to be torn down. Isn't that right, Twilight?"
"I don't know how the usual inspector missed it," Twilight said grumpily. She was clearly annoyed at not having her question answered, but her irritation faded as she succumbed to the joy of bureaucracy. "The Ponyville building code clearly states..."
Fleur Dis Lee gave Fancy Pants a grateful look. He acknowledged it with a barely perceptible nod as Twilight lectured. The young princess was waving her hooves and gesticulating with her wings for emphasis. Everypony at the table leaned back into their seats. This was going to take awhile.