"Pay attention to me!" Diamond Tiara whined. A few ponies stopped and gave her odd looks, but they otherwise ignored her. This time, she screamed. "Pay attention to me!" Same response as last time, except one stallion decided to offer his input.
"Shut up, filly. I'm trying to read here."
Diamond Tiara angrily flopped down onto her stomach and began to cry. Why wasn't this working? She'd been standing in the street for a whole five minutes, showing off how gorgeous she was, but there was barely anybody watching her, not even when she tried fancy poses. She did get a free brochure for physical therapy, though.
Suddenly, an idea came to mind, and she stopped crying. Slowly she sat up, sniffling and wiping the tears from her eyes. She grabbed her tiara from where it had fallen on the ground and did her best to fix her hair.
It was a risky idea, but she'd seen it work before. While on vacation in another town, she'd witnessed a green-maned unicorn doing almost the same thing.
"Um, excuse me?" she called out. Nopony listened to her, but that was soon to change. "If you pay attention to me, I'll give you free money. Extra points if you shower me with praise."
Instantly, everypony within a two-mile radius went completely silent. The silence didn't last long, however. Everypony rushed over to surround the filly, pushing and shoving and fighting over who got to be in the front row. The closer you are, the more chance there is of grabbing some money.
Diamond Tiara put on her best grin and struck the most fabulous pose she could think of. The crowd erupted into cheers, so she tossed out a few bits. She did a spin on her head, and the crowd cheered again. Another few bits.
Somepony flew off to Cloudsdale and spread the word of Diamond Tiara's performance, then returned mere minutes later with hundreds of pegasi in tow. Diamond Tiara noticed this and increased the rate of which she was throwing money.
Meanwhile, Sweetie Belle, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo were pacing around backstage, sweating bullets. Sweetie Belle occasionally peeked out from behind the curtain, then groaned and resumed her pacing.
"Where is everypony?" she demanded. "Not a single pony in the audience!"
"I know, it isn't fair," Scootaloo complained. "We had over a hundred people RSVP saying that they'd attend our play for sure, and even more that said they could probably come. But the play was supposed to start twenty minutes ago, and none of them have."
"Maybe we're just stupid and they were bein' sarcastic," Apple Bloom grumbled.
"That's a stupid idea," Sweetie Belle argued. She then rushed back out onto the stage, then walked back in with a groan, dragging her hooves. "Maybe you're right. Maybe nobody cares."
"Yeah! Go Diamond Tiara!"
The crowd exploded into even more cheers of agreement, then cries of joy as some lucky ponies were able to catch the money. The pegasi and unicorns may have seemed to have an advantage, but when it came to money, earth ponies were viscous. They had no problem engaging in wrestling and throwing themselves into the path of the bits.
Diamond Tiara beamed and batted her eyes at the crowd as she tossed a few more bits their way. Oh, the attention! She was loving this.
"Ah'm tellin' ya, no one's comin'! We may as well just go home," Apple Bloom yelled at Scootaloo, who was angrily buzzing a foot off of the ground.
"Well you know what? I think-" Scootaloo couldn't finish her statement, however, as Sweetie Belle burst between them.
"Girls, Applejack is here," she announced.
"Wait, what?" the other two crusaders said in unison. Without a pause, they both ran onstage to see the auditorium, where Applejack indeed was standing.
"Applejack," Apple Bloom cried, jumping off the stage and dashing over to her older sister, "where is everypony?"
Applejack hugged her distraught sister. "It's alright, Apple Bloom," she reassured her, but Apple Bloom was not reassured.
"No, it's not. Where is everypony?" she asked again.
"They're watchin' Diamond Tiara's performance," Applejack admitted.
"Ah knew it! That stinkin', good-for-nothing little brat is nothing but a-" Applejack silenced her with a hoof.
"No name callin'," she scolded.
"Ah should be able to call her whatever Ah want to. Did she seriously steal our entire audience?" Apple Bloom hopped out of her sister's lap and stood defiantly with the rest of the crusaders.
"Not quite." Applejack smiled, and five ponies took their cue to step out of the shadows. Rarity, Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders were not impressed.
"And how many ponies are at Diamond Tiara's thing?" Scootaloo demanded.
"Thousands, but that doesn't matter." Applejack winced at Apple Bloom's furious expression. Sweetie Belle fainted, and Rarity rushed over to make sure she was okay.
"It doesn't matter? It doesn't matter?" Apple Bloom shouted angrily.
"Of course it matters!" Scootaloo agreed.
"No, it doesn't matter, and do you know why that is?" Fluttershy said softly, diffusing some of the anger with her gently voice.
"Why?" Apple Bloom asked.
"Because none of those thousands of ponies actually cares about what Diamond Tiara is doing." Fluttershy smiled. "They're just there for the money. On the other hoof, us six care very much about you three, and we'd love to see your performance. Which on do you think is better?"
"Thousands of ponies," Apple Bloom answered immediately. Scootaloo nodded fervently, but another voice disagreed with them.
"Actually... I prefer to have six ponies that care about me," Sweetie Belle said groggily, having woken up recently. "The first thing Fluttershy said is like singing at a concert, but the whole audience has earplugs in. The second thing - six ponies that care - sounds much better to me."
"Yeah, I guess you're right," Scootaloo sighed. "I'm just... so mad! But I guess it's okay if Rainbow Dash gets to watch the play."
"Well, if you two are fine with it, then Ah am too," Apple Bloom finally agreed. "Now, let's perform our play!"
At the end of the play, the applause from just six ponies filled the crusaders with joy, more than the applause from a thousand ponies could have done for them.
Because the six ponies actually cared.