'While things were cooling down around Ponyville, over in Canterlot, Caboose was facing an upheaval in his own life. What follows is the first in a three part story, as trying to tell it all in one would take more than a week to tell it properly, and I like to keep to a weekly schedule. Complied together from letters that Caboose sent to me over a period of a few weeks prior, with the permissions of those involved in this story, I shall regale you a tale of how my brother had to contend with a newcomer that would give him a run for his money. We'll start, as stories often do, at the beginning...'
Chapter Sixteen: Changing Of The Guard (Part One)
’Surely, anypony who had met my brother can tell you that he is of a unique variety. Make no mistake, Caboose is really the best as they come nowadays, a loyal and caring stallion to the end, but unfortunately, ‘uniqueness’ isn’t usually a quality that others sought out for a friend. Caboose always had problems making new friends, especially in the time of which he was sharing his brain with O’Malley, and even when he did make one, it rarely lasted longer than a month, let alone a week.’
‘Luckily, when Blueblood came into our life and Caboose was sent to Canterlot, Caboose had the luxury of befriending members of the royal family, and by some miracle, managed to not get on their bad sides or accidentally killed them in say, some freak badminton accident... but that’s another story.’
‘However, one pony that Caboose had really come to enjoy as a friend was none other than the captain of the Royal Guard, Ironclad Centurion Hooves... or Iron Hooves as ponies call him. Their friendship was a rocky start at first, due to Caboose repeating what Vinny said about cows, milk, and women, but soon, after bonding over Caboose spraying a trio of begrudged debutantes, the two hit it off as the best of friends. Not even O’Malley, who had tried to kill Iron during his final days, could break that bond. Iron Hooves always had Caboose's back, no matter what. He knew Caboose had a good heart, so he supported him in every way a Captain could. It certainly made Caboose’s job in fitting in the Royal Guard easier. It seemed like the two would serve together as brothers in arms forever...but alas, it had to come to an end. It all began one night, when Caboose and his family attended a party...’
Caboose and his family raced to the Royal Guard barracks, which was the venue for Captain Iron Hooves’s retirement party. Iron had held a long and distinguished career, involving such feats as fighting off Diamond Dogs solo, leading his troops in bringing down a rabid hydra, apprehending the members of a counterfeit jewel ring, and helping to protect the Crystal Empire from a Changeling invasion, to name a few. However, Iron couldn't deny that he wasn't in his prime any more. After the Crystal Sun incident, in which he considered one of his finest hours, he decided to retire, before some other monstrous tyrant tried to take over Equestria. As Iron's lieutenant, Caboose was determined not to be late.
"Come on guys, hurry up!" Caboose urged. "We don't want to miss the party!"
"Yay, party!" Michael cheered.
"Maybe we could have gotten here sooner if a certain somepony weren't so busy trying on her party dresses..." Daring glanced at Hurricane.
"So sue me for wanting to look nice for Captain Hooves's retirement." Hurricane pouted, her seafoam green party dress billowing in the wind.
"Are you sure it's Iron Hooves you want to look nice for?" Caboose smirked.
"Sure it is." Hurricane blushed lightly. "And if Gauntlet just happens to be there, he'll get to see me look nice too."
"I'm sure he'll be dazzled." Daring beamed.
"Thanks, mom." Hurricane grinned.
"Blushy Hurri!" Michael giggled.
"Zip it, Mikey." Hurricane pouted.
The family arrived at the barracks just in time. Several other members of the Royal Guard, along with their families, were also in attendance.
"Hey, Caboose!" Iron cheered, standing alongside his wife, Gusty, and Gauntlet. "Glad you could make it!"
"Like I'd ever miss this." Caboose smiled, hoof bumping Iron. "I love a good party, especially if it's for the best captain around."
"Thanks, Caboose." Iron smiled. "A party's just not the same without you."
"If you say so." Caboose chuckled. "So, if you're retiring, does that mean you're going to live in a retirement home?"
"Hoh-hoh, not even close." Iron Hooves chuckled. "I'm not that old, you know."
"So why are you ditching the ol' armor?" Daring asked.
"I just figured I'd had my time." Iron Hooves declared. "Better to quit while I'm ahead, and spend some more time with the family."
"And I couldn't be happier about it." Gusty kissed her husband on the cheek.
"Do you really have to go?" Caboose asked, suddenly morose. "The Royal Guard won't be the same without you. "
"You'll manage." Iron said firmly. "I have faith in all of you. Especially you, Caboose. I know you'll stick firm by your duty."
"Heh-heh, duty..." Caboose snickered, before righting himself. "You can count on me, Cap."
"I knew I would." Iron clapped a hoof on Caboose's shoulder.
"I'll miss you, though." Caboose sighed.
"And I'll miss you, old friend." Iron declared. "I've never known a pony quite like you."
"I don't why, but I get that a lot." Caboose shrugged.
Meanwhile, Gauntlet and Hurricane were having their own little talk.
"Hey, Hurri." Gauntlet grinned. "You look great."
"Thanks, G." Hurricane blushed.
"Blushy Hurri!" Michael giggled.
"You mind your sister, little fella." Daring admonished Michael, though trying not to smile in doing so. "Or there'll be no cake for you."
"Okay, mommy." Michael nodded.
"Thanks, mom." Hurricane smiled.
"No problem." Daring chuckled. "Now you two go and enjoy the party."
"Oh, we will." Hurricane smirked. "Come on, G. Let's hit the dance floor!"
"Right behind you." Gauntlet followed her eagerly.
As the party got under way, Caboose and his family made sure to enjoy every part of it. Caboose and Daring joined Hurricane and Gauntlet on the dance floor, while Michael stuffed his face with party snacks.
"Yummy!" He said through a mouthful of cheese and crackers.
As the evening neared its end, Iron took center stage, ready to make his retirement speech.
"First of all, I'd like to thank you all for coming. When I first became a member of the Royal Guard, I was just some green, wet behind the ears punk. It didn't look like I'd amount to much. But I kept at it, carrying out my duties, growing stronger every day, and loving every minute of it. Before I knew it, I had been made a Captain. That was the proudest day of my life, and I swore to always live up to the responsibilities of my position. That was so many years ago, but it seems like it all happened yesterday. Words cannot express how much I love this job, and how I will miss protecting and serving the citizens of Equestria." He smiled at his fellow Guards. "I want to let you all know how glad I was to be able to serve alongside my fellow Guards."
The Guards all cheered.
"The honor was all ours!"
"We're gonna miss ya, big guy!"
"Good luck!"
Iron gave them an indulgent grin.
"Though I will be leaving these hallowed halls, one day, my son will no doubt take on the mantle of a Royal Guardspony." He continued. "He will continue this family's grand tradition... and I don't think I could feel any prouder."
Gauntlet waved at his father, while Hurricane nudged him playfully.
"Rest assured, you will not be without leadership for long." Iron declared. "My successor will be coming to you in a few days' time. I trust he will provide you with the same leadership and support I did. In the meantime, I'm sure you can take care of yourselves. I know you will continue the proud service of Guardsponyship. I couldn't have asked for better comrades, and Equestria couldn't ask for better defenders. Once again, I thank you for everything."
The crowd cheered as Iron stepped down from the podium. Soon after, the party came to an end, and the partygoers returned home. Caboose held off for a moment to talk to Iron.
"Whoever the new guy is, he'll never be the Captain you were." He smiled.
"Don't be so sure." Iron said humbly. "Who knows? Maybe he'll be even better."
"I'll be the judge of that." Caboose declared. "Anyway, enjoy your retirement."
"I will." Iron grinned. "And you and your family are welcome to drop by any time."
"Thanks, Iron." Caboose beamed. "You're the best."
"So everypony keeps telling me." Iron chuckled.
"It's true, though." Caboose declared. "You were a great Captain."
"Oh, I was just doing my job." Iron said humbly. "And I did it because it was duty."
"Heh, duty..." Caboose snickered again.
"I'm going to miss working with you every day, Caboose." Iron clapped Caboose on the shoulder. "And I'm sure my replacement will enjoy working with you as much as I did."
"Here's hopin', right?" Caboose shrugged. "Well, I gotta go. The fam's waiting for me."
"Goodbye for now, my friend." Iron smiled.
"Yeah, bye..." Caboose hid a tear as he turned to leave. Iron's retirement had hit him harder than he let on. But he didn't want to ruin the party with his sadness. The night, of course, was about Iron.
"You okay, Caboose?" Daring asked.
"Yeah, I'm just fine..." Caboose sniffed.
"Daddy sad?" Michael asked.
"A little." Caboose shrugged.
"That's okay." Hurricane smiled. "You're allowed to be sad. Iron was a good friend."
"Thanks, hon." Caboose let a tear down his eye.
"There, there, dad." Hurricane smiled. "Keep your chin up."
"I'll try..." Caboose sighed.
A week or two later, Caboose was still sad that Iron was gone. Being a Royal Guard just didn't have the same enjoyment that it once did.
"I still can't believe he's gone." He told Daring, wistfully poking at his food. "Every day when I come into the barracks, I expect to see him there. It’s kinda hard to not miss a giant Pegasus like him shouting orders."
"I know it's hard, accepting that somepony like Iron isn't around that much anymore." Daring sympathised, as she brought Michael his breakfast. "But that's how life is. Sometimes, ponies just drift apart." She smiled lightly. "And sometimes, they come closer, like Hurricane and Gauntlet..."
"Blushy Hurri!" Michael giggled inbetween bites.
Speaking of which, Hurricane and Gauntlet were sitting on Hurricane's bed together. A couple of days ago, they had agreed that the time had come to take their relationship to the 'next level' (as in heavy makeout sessions, and other such romantic endeavours). However, they were having trouble putting the plan into action. Their relationship was still in its infancy, and they hadn't done much more than holding hooves and pecking each other on the cheek. Subconsciously, they were uncertain whether they could take it further.
"So..." Hurricane said nervously.
"Yeah..." Gauntlet gulped. "Guess we oughta get started..."
"Uh-huh." Hurricane chuckled weakly. "Wait, do I start, or should you?"
"I think we both should." Gauntlet shrugged.
"Okay..." Hurricane nodded.
They both made to put their hooves around each other, in gestures that interfered with the other.
"Sorry." They chorused.
After a couple more mistakes, they settled for placing their hooves together.
"Alright..." Gauntlet said, his voice cracking. "Phase two..."
"Yep." Hurricane squeaked.
They both leaned forward, hoping for a kiss. But they leaned forward too far and too fast, and wound up knocking their heads together.
"Ow!" Hurricane yelped.
"Yowch!" Gauntlet cringed.
They broke apart, nursing their heads.
"Well, that didn't work the way I thought it would." Hurricane rubbed her head.
"No kidding." Gauntlet groaned.
At that moment, Caboose entered the room.
"You kids playing nice up here?" He asked.
"'Course we are." Gauntlet nodded. "Why wouldn't we be?"
"I'm gonna go get some ice..." Hurricane declared, rubbing her head.
After Hurricane left the room, Caboose turned to Gauntlet.
"Don't give up, kid." He smiled. "You'll get there soon enough."
"Uh, say what?" Gauntlet frowned.
"I know you guys are looking to go to the 'next level'." Caboose declared. "Hurricane told me."
"And... you're cool with that?" Gauntlet asked.
"Sure I am." Caboose sat beside Gauntlet, pulling a pipe from out of nowhere, as well as a pair of dorky-looking glasses, as he put on the glasses and chew on the pipe, "My little girl's growing up. She's exploring herself, and her feelings. And I can't think of a better stallion than you to help her along the way."
"Oh." Gauntlet nodded, nonplussed. "Thanks, I guess..."
"Don't mention it." Caboose chuckled. "And don't get discouraged by a couple of slip-ups. We've all been there. Some of us, more than others."
"Have you?" Gauntlet asked.
"More times than I can remember." Caboose chuckled. "The key is not to force it, let it happen naturally."
"Guess it's worth a shot." Gauntlet shrugged.
"That's the ticket." Caboose smiled, as he got up and left the room. "You two have fun, now…”
Not long after Caboose left, Hurricane returned, holding an ice pack to her head.
"So, shall we... try again?" She offered.
"Maybe another time." Gauntlet declared. "Don't want to rush it, y'know?"
"I guess." Hurricane shrugged. "I'll come by your place tomorrow, okay?"
"Sure." Gauntlet planted a kiss on Hurricane's cheek. "Until then..."
Hurricane watched as her coltfriend departed, a little perturbed by Gauntlet's sudden change of opinion.
The next day, in the Royal Guards' mess hall, Caboose sat down with his tray of food, still a bit downtrodden by Iron’s absence... however, the food was able to take his mind off it... but not for the reason one would think.
"Ah jeez, they undercooked the burrito again." He frowned. With a glow of his horn, the plate the burrito was on began to heat up, heating up the food along with it. "There we go, just a few more minutes."
As he focused his magic on heating his burrito, Caboose couldn’t help but overhear two of the other Guards talking at the table behind him.
"Did you hear about the new guy?" One asked.
"Oh, yeah." The other nodded. "Talk about hardcore."
"I heard he came from a Norhay military academy." The first retorted. "Those places are crazy brutal. Probably had him running with ten ton weights tied to his hooves."
"Please..." Caboose snorted under his breath, still continuing to heat the burrito. “Even I know you can’t run with ten tons. Maybe five tons. But not ten tons.”
"They say he graduated top of his class." The first Guard continued. "Got the highest grades in the academy's history, even..."
"I heard he's a whiz with a bow and arrow." The second remarked. "The things he can do with them... it's like he's one with the arrow."
"Whatever..." Caboose mumbled. He was trying to focus more on his burrito, and not feel intimidated by this new Captain's reputation.
Just then, another Guard raced into the mess hall.
"He's coming!" He yelled. "The new Captain's on his way here!"
"So he's here, at last..." Caboose frowned, still trying to focus on the burrito.
The other Guards went into a frenzy.
"Oh, buck!"
"He'll probably have our hides if he sees us just sitting around!"
"To the courtyard, quick!"
Every Guard in the room (save for Caboose) suddenly got up and raced out of the room. Caboose would’ve joined them, but his burrito hadn’t finished heating up.
“Come on... come on...” Caboose sweated as the burrito began to steam. “Anytime now...”
A delicious smelling waft of steam indicated that the burrito was done. Caboose quickly scooped it up and was about to make a dash to leave... when he suddenly came face to face with another pony.
The pony in question was a peach-colored young Earth Pony stallion with green eyes a three-toned brown, dark brown and amber mane, which was styled a tad messily in the front, but roached in the back, and a bow and arrow Cutie Mark. He stood about the same height as Caboose, maybe being a bit taller than him. His armor was of a different style to most of the Royal Guard; It was a duller gold, lacking the saddle, with a vaguely heart-shaped chest plate. He seemed to carry himself with a sense of professionalism and rigidness, belying his youthful appearance. He seemed to be in his early twenties at the latest.
"Um, hi." Caboose said awkwardly.
"Hello." The pony nodded. "I did not expect anypony to still be in here. They all seem to have made a beeline to the grounds.”
“Yeah…I was kinda in the middle of heating up my burrito.” Caboose shrugged, holding up said burrito.
“Ah, yes. I heard that they have a tendency to undercook the food.” The young stallion admitted.
“Yeah... um... and you might be?” Caboose murmured.
“Ah, right...” The stallion cleared his throat, “My name is Fletcher Ulysses. I am the new captain of the guard, succeeding a ‘Iron Hooves’.”
"Seriously?" Caboose gaped, looking him up and down. "You look a lot... younger than I was expecting."
"I guess I am at that." Fletcher shrugged.
"Well…I’m Caboose Napoleon." Caboose introduced himself, “Lieutenant of the-”
"Oh, I know who you are." Fletcher declared. "I've heard quite a lot about you, Mr. Napoleon."
"Really?" Caboose asked.
"Really." Fletcher nodded. "You know, for a criminal, you're not quite what I expected."
"…What's that supposed to-?" Caboose frowned.
"That's enough talk for now." Fletcher said sternly. "I would advise you get down to the courtyard with the others. You don't get paid to slack off, remember."
"...Yes, sir." Caboose murmured, still a bit off-put by his comment.
Caboose headed down to the courtyard (quickly devouring his burrito on the way there), where all the other Guards were gathered. Fletcher followed, taking his place in front of them all. Like Caboose, some of them were surprised by how young he was.
"That's the 'hardcore' new Captain?" One gaped.
"He's so young!" Another whispered.
"No kidding." A third noted. "I've got a kid who's older than him!"
"Greetings." Fletcher announced. "I am your new Captain, Fletcher Ulysses. I realize your former Captain, Iron Hooves, left some big horseshoes to fill, but make no mistake, I will fill them. I have some changes in mind that should hopefully better our ranks, so we won't be outdone by some of those newer divisions I've heard about, like the Crystal Empire's 'Project Synchro'." He took on a stern look, If we are not to be outdone, we must outdo them first."
"Whoa, this kid's got some big ideas." One Guard remarked.
"Can't believe we're supposed to be taking orders from him." Another added.
"Something you fellows would like to share with the group?" Fletcher asked them, his voice taking a rather cold tone to it.
"No, sir." The first Guard.
"Nothing at all, sir." The other cringed.
"Lieutenant Caboose, step forward." Fletcher said suddenly.
"Um, okay..." Caboose obeyed.
"Attack me." Fletcher ordered.
"...Pardon?" Caboose asked.
"Attack me." Fletcher repeated. "That's an order, soldier."
"If you say so..." Caboose shrugged.
Caboose swung his hoof at Fletcher, but he effortlessly caught it. In the blink of an eye, Fletcher twisted it, causing Caboose to freeze in pain.
"Yah!" Caboose yelped. “Uncle! Uncle! Uncle!”
Fletcher suddenly flipped Caboose onto the ground, then pinned him down, holding the hoof against his back.
"Whoa!" One Guard gasped. "Did you see that?"
"Face of a baby, hooves of a pro wrestler!" Another grinned.
"Kid's got moves, I'll give him that." A third noted.
"Too bad for the Lieutenant, huh?" A fourth sniggered.
"Disappointing." Fletcher shook his head. "From what I'd heard, I expected you to have better skills than this."
Caboose felt a pang of anger, as Fletcher let him back up.
"As you were, Lieutenant." He said curtly.
Trying hard to not to scowl, Caboose returned to the crowd. Fletcher continued his speech, but Caboose was too angry to listen.
'Who does that punk think he is, humiliating me like that?' He thought. 'Insulting my skills. And in front of everypony else, too...'
"This is my first command, and I don't intend for it to be my last." Fletcher announced. "I expect nothing short of excellence from you all. You will assemble swiftly and silently every morning. Anyone who acts otherwise, will answer to me. Is that understood?"
"Yes, sir!" The Guards (save Caboose) answered.
"Good." Fletcher smiled. "You are dismissed. Go about your duties."
The Guards filed out of the courtyard. Caboose trudged out, still angry.
Meanwhile, Daring was shopping in the Canterlot market, with Michael in tow.
"Shopping boring." Michael yawned.
"Just try to hang in there, sweetie." Daring declared. "We'll be heading home soon."
"Not soon enough." Michael pouted.
Just above Michael, a small dove flew over, landing on a lamppost.
"Ooh, pretty birdy!" Michael squealed.
The dove peered at Michael, then flew off into the market.
"Come back, birdy!" Michael called, chasing after it.
"Michael, no!" Daring yelled. "No running off by yourself!"
Daring started to follow, but was weighed down by all her shopping bags.
Michael ran down the streets, his eyes locked on the dove. Suddenly, he bumped into something, or rather, somepony; A powder blue Unicorn mare with a two-towned dark and light blue mane, light purple eyes, and a cape made entirely out of feathers, tied around her neck with a purple jewel. Her Cutie Mark was of a dove with a magic wand in its beak.
"Sorry." Michael gulped.
"Well, hello." The mare smiled.
"H-hi." Michael quivered. He was a little nervous around strangers.
"Aren't you the cutest little colt?" The mare cooed.
"Nice lady..." Michael blushed. Suddenly, the dove he was chasing landed on the mare's waiting hoof. "Birdy!"
"Oh, you've met Dinah, have you?" The mare smiled, lowering her hoof. "Wanna say hello?"
"Hi, birdy." Michael smiled, gently patting Dinah on the head. The dove cooed in response.
"She likes you." The mare noted.
"I like her, too." Michael smiled.
"So, what's your name, cutie?" The mare asked.
"Michael." Michael smiled.
"Nice to meet you." The mare grinned. "I'm Dove."
"Like the birdy!" Michael grinned.
"Yeah, like the birdy." Dove nodded. "Speaking of, do you wanna see a trick?"
"...Okay!" Michael nodded.
Dove held up her other hoof. She waved it over the hoof holding Dinah, and the dove vanished.
"Awww...." Michael frowned. "Birdy gone?"
"Not quite." Dove smiled. "Say, you've got something in your ear..."
Dove mimed pulled something out of Michael's ear, holding it tightly in her hooves. She opened them up to reveal Dinah, who cooed loudly.
"Birdy!" Michael cheered. "How'd you get in my ear?"
"That's a little something called magic, Mike." Dove declared.
"Again, again!" Michael clapped.
At that point, Daring finally caught up with Michael.
"There you are." She told him sternly. "What did I tell about running off like that?"
"Sorry, mommy." Michael apologized.
"Thanks for keeping him in one place for me." Daring told Dove. "I hope he wasn't too much trouble."
"Not at all." Dove smiled. "He's the sweetest little colt I've ever seen!"
"Gotta love me!" Michael giggled.
"I'm Dove, by the way." Dove introduced herself.
"Daring." Daring nodded. "I haven't seen you around before. You new around here?"
"That I am." Dove nodded. "I just moved here with my fiancé."
"How nice for you." Daring smiled. "I settled down here with my own beau a few years back. It can be hard, fitting into a new home."
"Not if you meet the right ponies." Dove declared, turning to Michael. "Like this sweet little guy!"
"Thank you." Michael giggled.
"Such good manners." Dove grinned. "You've clearly done a good job of raising him."
"Well, I did have some practice." Daring said humbly. "I already had a daughter, Hurricane, before Michael was born."
"And I'll bet she's as precious as little Mikey is." Dove grinned.
"She has her moments." Daring grinned. "Say, would you like to get some coffee? I owe you for taking care of Michael."
"I'd love to." Dove nodded.
"There's this great little café, not far from here." Daring pointed. "Best lattes around."
"Can I get one of those big cookies, mommy?" Michael asked.
"Of course, sweetheart." Daring nodded.
"Yay!" Michael cheered.
The three ponies (plus Dinah) headed for the café.
Once they got their orders, Daring and Dove started talking. At the same time, Michael was eating his big cookie, periodically tossing crumbs to Dinah.
"So, you're a magician?" Daring asked.
"Illusionist." Dove declared. "A horn makes magic all too easy. Now, sleight of hoof is a real art. How about you? What do you do?"
"I used to be an explorer." Daring declared. "I traveled all over, saw all kinds of sights... until I met the stallion of my dreams, and settled down."
"Do you ever miss your old life?" Dove asked.
"Sometimes." Daring admitted. "But being a mother is an adventure in itself. Michael can be quite the little rascal you know."
"This sweet angel?" Dove pinched his cheek. "I don't believe it."
"Silly mommy." Michael grinned.
"Oh, trust me." Daring chuckled. "There's a wild dervish under that sweet face. And you don't want to get in his way."
"I'll believe it when I see it." Dove declared. "But I'll bet it's still a joy to raise him."
"On that, we agree." Daring chuckled, ruffling Michael's mane. "You're mommy's little colt, aren't you?"
"Yeah..." Michael giggled.
"Oh, I hope to one day be a mother." Dove sighed.
"I'm sure you'll be a great one." Daring grinned. "You already have such a way with kids..."
"Guess I do." Dove chuckled. "Speaking of, I could foalsit for you sometime, if you'd like."
"That would be great." Daring smiled. "As much as I love this little guy, it doesn't hurt to take a break from being a mom."
"Yay!" Michael cheered. "Miss Dove's gonna be my foalsitter!"
"I sure will, cutie." Dove pinched Michael's cheeks again.
Meanwhile, back at the castle, Fletcher called Caboose to his office.
"You wanted to see me, sir?" Caboose asked.
"Yes, Lieutenant." Fletcher nodded. "I'd like you to join me on my rounds today."
"Me?" Caboose frowned. "Why?"
"Well, you do know the castle." Fletcher pointed out. "I still have yet to memorize the layout of the place, and I figured, as Lieutenant, it's practically your duty to join me."
"Heh-heh, duty..." Caboose snickered.
"Seriously, Lieutenant?" Fletcher frowned. "What are you, a six-year-old?"
"Hey, there's no age limit on comedy..." Caboose pouted.
"Come on, let's go." Fletcher sighed.
"Right behind you." Caboose murmured. "As far behind you as I can get..."
As they patrolled the halls, Caboose suddenly remembered something.
"When you said you'd heard a lot about me, what did you mean, sir?" Caboose asked.
"Well, there are quite a few stories flying around about you, Lieutenant." Fletcher declared. “Especially given recent events regarding your... ’family’.”
“Oh, you heard about that, huh?” Caboose cringed.
“But of course. It was all they would talk about back at the academy.” Fletcher explained. “To think, we had a family full of wanna-be ‘Robbin’ Hooves’ just a few countries over.”
“Wanna-bes? More like the Cosa Neighsa.” Caboose boasted... only to cringe at Fletcher’s hard glance, “I mean, we weren't that bad, sir.”
"I find that hard to believe." Fletcher growled. "Even putting aside your 'family business', there is much in your record I find unsettling."
“Like what?” Caboose frowned.
"Like how you blew up Prince Blueblood's room, just to get at a fly..." Fletcher pointed out.
"In my defence, it was quite a big fly." Caboose countered.
"Or the time when you actually took a chair to Princess Celestia's face." Fletcher said bluntly.
"I had a perfectly good reason for doing that." Caboose declared. "You see, what happened was-"
"And then there was the time when you apprehended a rogue by the name of Caballeron, and did not turn him over to the rest of the Guards." Fletcher frowned. "That would be a flagrant violation of conduct."
"Like anypony would miss a pony like that." Caboose snorted. “He went and beat off my hoof-tip!”
“Lieutenant... your hooftip is still the same as it was all those years ago.” Fletcher rolled his eyes.
"To the untrained eye, maybe..." Caboose frowned. "What's your point?"
"My point is that you tend to lean towards reckless and rash behaviour." Fletcher retorted. "it is most unbecoming in a stallion of your position."
"I wouldn't say 'reckless' exactly." Caboose frowned. "And I've never understood that 'rash behaviour' thing. How can a skin condition be used to describe what you're doing?"
"Not only that, but I heard about all the smaller antics you seem to repeatedly get up to." Fletcher continued. "Using your spear as a toothpick, letting your infant son play with your helmet, sleeping while on duty, talking to the wall or to the sky, breaking into a TV theme song..."
"Well of course it sounds bad if you say it all together." Caboose shrugged. "But I've done good work for Equestria as a Royal Guard. Not counting Caballeron, and all the small-time crooks I've taken in, I also helped end the menace of Ahuitzotl, risked my life to protect the Royal family from a rogue Thestral, and personally arrested Zugzwang Marwari, the notorious Hinian crime boss. And not forgetting that I made the Royal Guard half a mil bits from our recent charity auction. Heck, I helped stop Black Knight Paladin, you know. That's what got me the badge of honor!”
"And that means everypony has to ignore your shortcomings?" Fletcher glared contemptuously. "Well, guess again. Iron Hooves may have been willing to overlook your sloppy attitude, but not me.”
“Sloppy?!” Caboose gaped in anger, “Hey, wait just a min-”
“No.” Fletcher cut him off, “Iron bestowed me this position because he believed I was qualified to take his place. And I will uphold my duty as captain to make sure this squadron runs perfectly. I don't need anypony, especially you, causing trouble in my camp. I suggest you shape up, Lieutenant, or suffer the consequences. Do I make myself clear?"
"…Crystal, sir." Caboose said through gritted teeth.
“Good.” Fletcher nodded, “Now shall we finish the rounds?”
“Yes, sir.” Caboose stifled a growl as the two continued their patrol.
Later that afternoon, Caboose returned home. Daring was in high spirits.
"Hey, honey." She smiled. "I met the nicest mare today. She was so sweet, and Michael really liked her. We'll be going out for lunch together tomorrow. Hopefully, she can come by here, and you can meet her for yourself."
"Great..." Caboose frowned, barely listening.
"So, did you meet the new Captain yet?" Daring asked.
"Yeah, I did." Caboose growled.
"And?" Daring urged.
"And he was a total jerk!" Caboose yelled. "He called me 'sloppy'! Can you believe that? Ten years in the Royal Guard, and not once had anypony called me that! Can you believe the nerve of that guy?!"
"Well..." Daring frowned.
"Not to mention he humiliated in front of everypony else for no reason!" Caboose ranted. "If I didn't know better, I'd say he had it out for me..."
"Maybe you just got off on the wrong hoof." Daring suggested. "Maybe you'll patch things up tomorrow."
"Yeah, maybe..." Caboose frowned. “But I will tell you this much, I no longer feel sorry for that village my brothers and I accidentally set on fire back in Norhay.”
The next day, Caboose reported for duty with some trepidation. Part of him was hoping Daring was right and Fletcher would warm up to him. The other half was dreading how bad things could go this time. At first, things seemed fine. The Guards gathered in the courtyard, and Fletcher sent them on their assignments without much trouble. Fletcher didn’t even give him a second glance. But that didn't last...
As Caboose made his rounds, he across Fletcher yelling at one of the newer Royal Guards, a silver Pegasus named Quillblade, whose armor wasn't in the best of shape, being covered in scratches and dirt…
"What is wrong with you, soldier?" Fletcher growled. "Walking around in that tarnished armor?! We have codes of conduct!"
"But sir, I-" Quillblade trembled.
"But nothing." Fletcher cut him off. "One Royal Guard represents all the others. You dishonor our whole order, wearing your armor in such a state."
"It wasn't my fault, sir." Quillblade declared. "I was chasing a thief when I slipped and fell in mud."
"And it never occurred to you to wash up afterwards?" Fletcher snarled. "Have you no respect for your armor? For what it means? You slapdash, lazy-"
"Hey, knock it off!" Caboose suddenly stepped forward.
Fletcher paused mid-speech, as he then seethed at Caboose with fury in his eyes.
"Excuse me?" Fletcher glared.
"You heard me." Caboose glared back. "There's no need to be so mean. Quillblade isn't hurting anypony."
"He's hurting our reputation." Fletcher retorted.
"Still doesn't give you the right to yell at him." Caboose retorted. "Iron Hooves never got so worked up about this kind of thing."
"Well, I'm not Iron Hooves, am I?" Fletcher growled. "I have my own way of doing things."
"You mean like being a jerk to your subordinates?" Caboose snarled. "Wait, is 'subordinate' the right word?"
"Yes." Fletcher nodded.
"Huh, how about that." Caboose smiled, before returning to his tirade. "I almost want to cut you some slack because you're new. But there's no excuse for this."
"You forget your place, Lieutenant." Fletcher said coldly. "Don't forget that I'm still the Captain, and your superior in chain of command. Badge of honor or not, I will not tolerate your insolence."
"Yeah, well-" Caboose started.
"Well, what?" Fletcher dared him.
Caboose was nearing his boiling point, as a struggle raged inside his mind.
'Why, I oughta...'
'No, don't! You can't just mouth off to your captain like that!'
'Says who?'
'Says me, the rational side of your mind.'
'Really? Haven't heard from you in a while...'
'And who's fault is that?'
'Alright, don't get nasty...'
'Just don't do what you're thinking.'
'But this jerk needs a talking to!'
'That jerk is our superior officer. As in he could fire us. So don't do it.'
Caboose clenched his hooves... before unclenching them, and turning his face away in defeat.
"That's what I thought." Fletcher huffed. "Now, get back to your rounds, Lieutenant."
Scowling, Caboose turned and left.
”Stupid voice of reason.” Caboose growled in his head.
“And you." Fletcher turned to Quillblade. "Get that armor cleaned. And don't let this happen again. Understand?"
"Yes, sir." Quillblade gulped, rushing off to the barrack to clean his armor.
Back home, Caboose complained to Daring once more.
"The guy's got a stick up his butt, that's for sure." He growled. "All that over some dirty armor..."
"That does sound a little over the top." Daring admitted. "But the guy was made the new Captain for a reason, and it's probably a good one."
"Whatever it is, I'm not seeing it." Caboose pouted.
At that point, Hurricane entered the house.
"Hey, dad." She smiled, before registering his sour mood. "Whoa, what's up?"
"It's my new boss." Caboose sighed. "Fletcher. He's a real jerk."
"He is?" Hurricane asked.
"Oh, yeah." Caboose nodded. "He's bossy, mean, a neat freak... he's not fit to wear Iron Hooves' horseshoes."
"That's rough, dad." Hurricane acknowledged.
"Ah, but that's enough about me." Caboose shrugged. "How about you? How and you and Gauntlet doing?"
"Ehh, Gauntlet's been acting a little weird lately." Hurricane declared. "He keeps saying we should take things slow." Her face lit up with worry. "Maybe he's just not that into me anymore..."
"Of course he is." Caboose smiled. "That kid's crazy for you. Besides, it doesn't hurt to go slow." He whipped out the pipe again. "Sometimes, you gotta hang back and enjoy what you've got before you can move forward. Do you get what I'm saying?"
"I guess..." Hurricane smiled. "Thanks, dad."
"No prob, honey." Caboose grinned.
As Hurricane went off to her room, Daring glanced at Caboose's pipe.
"Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you're being such a great parent, but is the pipe really necessary?" Daring asked.
"Sure it is." Caboose grinned. "It really helps drive the 'supportive dad' thing home."
"If you say so." Daring rolled her eyes.
"Pipe daddy!" Michael squealed.
The next day, both Caboose and Fletcher were called in by Princess Celestia. When they met at the doors to the throne room, the two shared confrontational glares.
“Lieutenant.” Fletcher huffed.
“Captain.” Caboose huffed back.
"I'll be going first." Fletcher declared. "Highest rank, and all..."
"What happened to 'after you'?" Caboose snorted.
The two briefly struggled over the door. Caboose managed to push ahead... only to realise he didn't know whether to push or pull. As he deliberated, Fletcher stepped forward and pushed the door open.
"Oh, push..." Caboose realised. "I should've known."
As they entered the throne room, they both tried to reach the throne first. Fletcher had a headstart, but Caboose pushed ahead, winning by a nose. He threw Fletcher a triumphant smirk as they bowed.
"You sent for us, your highness?" Fletcher asked.
"Indeed I did, Captain Ulysses." Celestia nodded. "I would like for you and Lieutenant Napoleon to teach the Junior Guardspony session this afternoon."
"Both of us?" Caboose gulped. "Together?"
"With all due respect, your highness, I believe I would be better suited to train the Junior Guardsponies myself." Fletcher declared.
"Says you." Caboose muttered.
“Oh, I have no doubt in your training methods, captain.” Celestia nodded. “However, you are still new here, and the young ones had yet to meet you. I figure with a veteran such as Napoleon here, the first session would go by smoothly.”
"Again, will respect, I actually did a little teaching back at the academy with the first-year recruits." Fletcher added. "I am more than qualified for a solo effort."
"Well then, think how much more could be taught with the two of you." Celestia smiled, “Caboose here happens to be excellent with the students. His easygoing, lighthearted personality makes him quite relatable to the young ones, ensuring that they'll listen to what he has to say.”
"But I-" Fletcher started.
"Is there a problem, Captain?" Celestia asked.
"...No, your highness." Fletcher sighed.
"Excellent." Celestia smiled. "You are dismissed."
Caboose and Fletcher both walked out into the corridor.
"Well, guess we're partners." Caboose shrugged.
"Just follow my lead." Fletcher growled. "I don't want any of those kids picking up any of your so-called 'skills'."
“Hey, those kids love me.” Caboose glared.
"Only because you are one." Fletcher sneered.
Caboose mind was a debate group once more.
'That lousy-'
'Easy there.'
'No, not this time! This time, I'm gonna-Ow! Did you just stick me with... a... needle...?'
'Shhh, shh, shh, shh... Time to sleep now...'
Again, Caboose remained silent.
That afternoon, the Junior Guards stood out in the courtyard, Hurricane and Gauntlet among their number.
"What do you think they'll teach us this time?" Hurricane wondered.
"Maybe some more hoof-to-hoof combat styles." Gauntlet smiled.
"I hope it's more crossbow training!" A Unicorn colt grinned.
"Or maybe it's recon tactics." An Earth Pony colt suggested.
"Whatever it is, it's gonna be awesome." Gauntlet declared.
"No duh." Hurricane smirked.
Caboose came out first.
"Hi, kids." Caboose smiled. "It's me, Lieutenant Napoleon. I'll be one of your instructors today." He smiled even more widely as Hurricane waved at him. "Now, as I'm sure you've heard, Captain Iron Hooves retired, which means we have a new Captain..." He bite back the bile. "He'll be having a few words with you today, so allow me to introduce you to…" He stifled a sigh. “Captain Fletcher Ulysses.”
Fletcher stepped out, accompanied by another Guard, who was carrying a black case. The Junior Guardspony gaped, surprised at his youth.
"He's the Captain?" Gauntlet frowned. "He's gotta be what, nineteen?! How the heck does that work? My pa didn’t make captain till he was like, thirty!"
"Whoa." Hurricane gaped. She had heard a couple of things about the captain from her father, but never imagined that would be the face that was put to the stallion. It was perfectly angled, possessed boyish good looks, but at the same time held a strong, dignified expression. Hurricane couldn't take her eyes off him.
"Good afternoon, prospective future Guardsponies." Fletcher announced with a smile. "It does my heart good to see so many seeking the path of a Royal Guard. I know I was when I was about your age. My parents were blacksmiths, making all sorts of weapon for the Norhayan Armed Forces, and I, a fletcher.”
“A fletcher?” Gauntlet asked. “Like your name?”
“Indeed.” Fletcher nodded. “It’s what you call a pony who makes bows and arrows. After spending years working with my parents and watching the soldiers that came into our shop, I decided I wanted to be a soldier myself, and so I joined the Norhayan Military Academy. And through blood, sweat, and a few broken bones, I graduated at the top of my class. And under recommendations from Captain Iron, Prince Shining Armor, and Princess Celestia herself, I was called here to lead the Royal Guards.”
"Somepony's got connections." Caboose scoffed.
"Whoa!" One Junior Guard Pegasus gaped.
"Nice!" A Unicorn filly squeed.
“However, the academy taught me that it is not enough to dream of being a soldier. If one is to become a soldier, whether a Royal Guard, or a member of the Royal Defense Legion, one must be swift as the coursing river, with all the force of a great typhoon, with all the strength of a raging fire, and mysterious as the dark side of the moon.”
“What does that even mean?” Caboose frowned, “You sound like you’re trying to train them to fight the Hacks, or something.”
“I am explaining what it truly takes to become a soldier.” Fletcher declared.
“With requirements like that, you’ll be lucky to get a single new Guard out of this.” Caboose blanched. “They’re just kids, you know.”
“Who are going to become the next generations of defenders.” Fletcher explained, as he turned to the students. “Sure, it may seem daunting, but you all knew that right? With all the qualities I had specified and much more, you will one day learn skills vital for combat... such as this....."
Fletcher grabbed a spear from a nearby rack. With a small toss, he entered into spear throwing position, and after a second of aiming, he threw it at a target with fierce, hitting the bullseye. It hit it so hard that the tip poked through the wood of the target panel.
“Ooh.” The Juniors cooed in awe.
“Oh, I bet the dark evil forces are trembling in their shoes.” Caboose rolled his eyes.
“Save your awe, soldiers.” Fletcher smirked, “That was just a warm up.” He turned to the other Guard. "My case, please."
"Yes, sir." The Guard passed the case to Fletcher.
“Thank you.” Fletcher nodded, as he set the case down. He opened it, and pulled out of it a bow and quiver. The bow was a custom-built recurve bow, painted gold, with a solid black riser.
“A bow?” Caboose frowned, unimpressed. While bows were a commonplace weapon alongside crossbows, it was mainly a weapon for unicorns, as they were hard to use with just hooves. Some ponies choose to use their teeth, but it wasn't exactly comfortable.
“Watch and learn, children.” Fletcher nodded. With bow in hoof and quiver on back, Fletcher faced the target, and suddenly, leapt to his hindlegs. With swift and precise movements, Fletcher quickly reached for an arrow and nocked it on his bow, and less than a second later, pulled back and...
*SHING!*
The arrow flew across the courtyard. Not only did it hit the bottom of the spear’s shaft, it went right through it, splitting it down the middle, and embedding itself in the speartip below.
The Junior Guards gasped in awe.
"Wow, what a show-off." Caboose muttered.
However, Fletcher was not done. He twirled around like a ballerina, shooting at the other targets with blinding speed. He even performed trick shots for some, banking them off walls and other obstacles. Suddenly, he pointed to the a highest tower in the castle, which he had placed a target on earlier. He tensed his bow, aiming, then released. The bow flew straight upwards
"Buck, he's good." Caboose admitted grudgingly.
The Junior Guards cheered like mad.
"Awesome!" A Unicorn colt yelped.
"Incredible!" An Earth Pony filly applauded.
"Now you see. Once you master skills such as these is only then, will you be able to join our hallowed ranks." Fletcher continued, as he placed his bow back in the case. "It won't be easy, but nothing worth striving for ever is."
"Wow..." Hurricane gazed at Fletcher, entranced. "He's great, isn't he?"
"Yeah, I guess..." Gauntlet frowned. "In a show-offy, over the top kinda way."
"And so cute..." Hurricane said dreamily.
"Well, if you like that sort of-wait, what?!" Gauntlet spluttered.
Caboose hadn't heard Hurricane's words, but he could see her gazing intently at Fletcher.
”Oh, you gotta be buckin’ kidding me.” Caboose blanched. "Bad enough he's messing up my job. The last thing I need is for Hurricane to start admiring that jerk..."
'That is where we end this part of the story. As bad as things were at that point, Caboose's troubles were only just beginning, as you will see in the next chapter. Until then...'