//------------------------------// // Little b***h! // Story: Deadpool in Equestria // by MrAquino //------------------------------// Alright, back to Deadpoolness. Where did we leave off? Oh! Right! Deadpool was... uh... Deadpool... what are you- "WHAT THE F**K MAN!!!" Deadpool yelled, putting his phone away "You're really into that type of s**t!?" Um... Deadpool, I have no idea what you're- "Will be snack for bits!? Talk about desperate! I have blueballs here, and I'm not complaining about it! Hell, I even destroyed that boombox you stashed in here repeating that Happy song on repeat!" THANK GOD FOR THAT!!! I prefer the parody. Who doesn't? ... People who are into this type of stuff. I was hoping you wouldn't find that. "AND YOU LOST, LITTLE B***H!!!" ... Alright, you won that one. Shall we continue and not argue each other? "No guarantees!" Fine. Alright, Deadpool heard a familiar man scream in the distance with some roaring. Looking over a cliff, Deadpool saw a familiar man battling against some pony looking shadows: TASKMASTER!!! "GET AWAY FROM ME!!!" Task yelled, slicing a demon's head off. "OI!!!" Deadpool yelled "TASKMASTER!!!" Task looked up and froze with fear. "Oh hell no!!! I'm am in hell!!! Back off, Deadpool!!!" Deadpool teleported right behind Taskmaster and shot at some demons that were charging at Task from behind. "Relax! We're in this together!" "WHAT!?!?!?" "HIT IT!!!" The shadows surrounded Deadpool and Taskmaster. The two pulled their swords out and began to fight off the demons: Deadpool using all his wackiness went into a blurry circle, slicing the demons while Taskmaster used his sword and shield to battle against the oncoming shadows. Some of the shadows jumped into each other and formed into larger shadows, most now assuming a more human looking form of the two. The rest of the shadow ponies were offed by Deadpool & taskmaster, but their bodies twitched and formed into either two swords or a sword & a shield. Both Deadpool & Taskmaster were back to back, both holding back a shadow. "It's no use!!!" Taskmaster yelled "There's too many of them! And I think they're learning!" Did he forget who we are? Let's show him a little Kingdom Hearts 2 Action! "TOGETHER!!!" Deadpool yelled. "What do you-" before Taskmaster could ask, he pulled out his two uzis along with Deadpool, the two went back to back, and fired at the demons in patterns, with Deadpool teleporting everywhere, confusing the shadows on where they were until all the demons were now gone! GET BONUS! *Shadow Form! GET BONUS! Maximum Defense increased "Ooh! Shadow Form!!!" Deadpool exclaimed to his new stats. Taskmaster breathed hard, then looked up to Deadpool. "Deadpool?" He asked "W-what the hell just happened?" "A duo move! I think we shall call that... Teli-shooter!!!" That's... not half bad, actually. It could be worse. "What brings you here?" Deadpool asked "I wasn't brought here," Task replied "I was sucked in here by some portal. Truth be told, I thought someone killed you when you were gone, but after seeing this, I can see you're far from gone." "UNLIKE YOUR FANBASE!!!" Deadpool posed while some 8-bit glasses fell over his eyes, some music played, everything went black & white, and the captions 'Thug Life' came into view. Taskmaster blinked for a few seconds. "Yep... it's really you." "Hey! Don't be dissin' me and my crew! You want to escape from this crib!?" "Uh... sure... my homie." "Good!" "But, where are we?" "We are in Tartarus, so the exit out of here is a cave!" "...A cave?" "Hey! Do you want to be left behind for those living shadow things?" "Uh... no. But I don't think we-" Deadpool grabbed Taskmaster and the two were near the exit of the cave. "Can... do... it." "Uh huh! That's what I thought gurl!" Loud howling was heard. "What the hell was that!?" "That be Cerberus!" "Cerberus!? THE CERBERUS!?!?!? What are we going to do!?" "Just stand still and watch." "Alright, if you say- OOOHHHH!!!" Deadpool punched Taskmaster in his nuts, making him fall to the floor and roll in pain. "THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!! ... Woop Woop Woop!" Deadpool ran out of Tartarus. "Hold on! I almost forgot my selfies!" He teleported to a restaurant in Ponyville, where Cranky and Matilda were having a romantic dinner. Deadpool swiped the toupee off Cranky's head!!! *Derpy yells last* While everypony was yelling bald, Deadpool took a selfie with the two love birds before running away! Celestia was sitting in her room, eating more cake while drinking tea. She stopped as he heard some music playing and Luna running away from it. "Leave me alone!" Luna yelled. "Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty!" Deadpool's voice repeated as Luna entered Celestia's room, chased by Deadpool and the Foxy animatronic. "Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty! Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty! Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty! Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty! Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty! Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty! Swiggity Swooty, I'm Coming For That Booty!" Celestia blinked for a few moments, then shrugged. "Why did I even bother banishing him in the first place?" She asked herself. Deadpool teleported right in front of her, grabbed the Princess by the back of her head, and kissed her like a cartoon character, making the Princess blush and swing her hooves around. Deadpool released Celestia from his kiss and slapped her on her flank area. "BOOTY!!!" Deadpool yelled before teleporting away. Celestia stared blank faced. "N-No pony's kissed me like that before."