//------------------------------// // The Setup // Story: Speed Dates // by Fire Gazer the Alchemist //------------------------------// Vinyl bobbed her head up and down, grinning as electronic music filled her living room.  She flipped a record into the air before slamming it onto her turntables and giving it a good spin.  Her amps exploded with the new track, and Vinyl cranked up the volume for good measure. Just for the thrill of it, she cackled wildly as she spun the records.  Two hours of experimentation was about to culminate in her best song yet, and nothing was going to tear her away from— Slam! Vinyl flinched, hitting the needle and sending a scratch running through the record, abruptly ending the song.  Looking over to the now open door to the house, she saw a tired-eyed Octavia slink inside. She blinked, watching her roommate enter in silence.  Octavia barely nodded a hello to her as she trudged into her side of the living room and flopped on her couch, giving a long, exasperated groan into the cushion. Vinyl pressed her lips together, and hopped down from her sound system.  Trotting over to her friend she pulled her shades up, letting them rest on her horn.   “So… uh… you’re home early.” Octavia offered a muffled “yep” into the couch. Vinyl frowned, but tried to keep a positive tone.  “Um… how’d the date go?” This time, Octavia turned her head outward and shot a glare at Vinyl.  “Oh, it was just dandy.” “That bad, huh?” Octavia groaned, and rolled over.  “It was going well in the beginning, actually.  We had a lot in common and he was rather handsome.”  She put a hoof over her face.  “But then… he started talking about his cats.” Vinyl snorted.  “What’s the problem?  I thought you liked cats” Lowering her eyelids, Octavia shot her another glare.  “He has thirty of them.” “You’re kidding.”  Octavia didn’t even blink as she continued staring down Vinyl.  “You’re not kidding.”   Octavia shook her head.  “I wish I was, but no.  And not only does he have thirty cats, but he likes talking about them.  Every.  Single.  One.  In intimate detail too.” Sucking in air through her teeth, Vinyl rubbed the back of her head guiltily.  “Geeze, I’m sorry Tavs.  I swear Noteworthy said he had only three cats.” “Well, you always were bad with numbers.”  Octavia sighed inwardly. Vinyl bit her lip.  “Tell you what, next guy I set you up with I’ll personally make sure he has no pets at all.” “No.”  Octavia sat up.  “No, I’m done with you all of your ridiculous blind dates.  In fact, I think I’m done with stallions for a while.” “Okay, no prob.  I know a few mares that—” “No mares either,” Octavia accentuated.  “I’m sick of dating in general, Vinyl.  I think it’s best if I just focus on my music for a while.” “Ah, what?”  Vinyl plopped herself in the seat next to Octavia.  “Tavi you spend like, eighty hours a day on your music.  What you need is to focus less on it and socialize a little.” “I socialize,” Octavia said, voice rising in offense.  “I went with you and Neon to that garish little bar you love so much just last week.” Vinyl arched her eyebrow.  “You showed up, ordered a glass of water, and then left after five minutes without talking to anypony besides me.  Oh wow, how social.” Octavia huffed and crossed her forelegs.  “Well, I… there was Cranky and Matilda’s wedding.” “You showed up, we played one hell of a song and then you left.”  Vinyl smirked, silently challenging Octavia to try again. “Well I… didn’t I do the… what about the… uh… hmm…”  Octavia bit her lip. Vinyl slugged her playfully on the shoulder.  “Ya see?  If it weren’t for me you’d stay locked up in here your whole life.” “I would not!” Laughing, Vinyl added, “you might’ve ended up with more cats than Noteworthy.” She rolled her eyes.  “I would do no such thing.” “Face it, you’d totally be a cat lady.” “Vinyl!”  Octavia took in a deep breath.  “Just because I prefer having a smaller circle of friends than most does not mean I will end up with three dozen cats.” Vinyl shrugged.  “Okay, fine.  ‘Scuse me for thinking you’d like a special somepony in your life.” Octavia rolled her eyes again.  “It’s not that I don’t want a special somepony, it’s just that I don’t want to keep wasting time on a bunch of blind dates who turn out to have thirty cats, or dine and dash for that matter.” Vinyl cringed.  “Right, uh, sorry about that.  If I knew Rainbow was going to ditch I would’ve told you to bring some bits.”  She earned another glare.  “Or… you know, never set you up with her in the first place.”   Shaking her head, Octavia sighed.  She stood up from the couch and walked over to her cello, undoubtedly intending to practice while there was still some daylight left. Frowning, Vinyl tapped her chin.  She knew meddling any further with Octavia’s social life — or lack thereof — was unwanted, but at the same time she couldn’t just resign herself to let Octavia remain a shut-in.  She had to get out somehow, and a relationship with another pony would both work, and be less of a daily hassle for Vinyl.  If only there was a way for Octavia to just speed through a bunch of dates until she found the right pony. A light bulb went off in Vinyl’s head. Hopping off the couch, she rushed to block Octavia’s path.  Putting herself in between the two, Vinyl threw up her hoof, forcing her friend to come to a stop. “Okay, so you’re saying you don’t wanna waste time dating, right?” “Yes.”  Octavia swerved, attempting to out-maneuver Vinyl and grab her instrument.  A mere sidestep was all it took to counter. “What if I told you there was a way to skip the all the boring junk about dating and cut right to the chase?” A dubious eyebrow rose.  “What way?” “It’ll be super quick and I guarantee you’ll find the right pony in like, one night.” “What way?” Octavia reiterated, her irritation growing. “Geeze, Tavi, you never heard of a surprise?” She glared at her friend. “Okay, yeesh, I’ll tell you… tomorrow.”  Vinyl backed away, heading for the door. “What?”  Octavia’s face scrunched up.  “Vinyl!” “Sorry Tavs, I got prep work to do!”  Vinyl bolted out the door, cutting off a frustrated groan from her friend. Though she only had half of a plan worked out, Vinyl decided to put it into motion anyway.  She took off running, just in case Octavia was about to try and follow her.  After a few turns, Vinyl’s legs began to burn, and she silently cursed herself for not just riding her turntables around town; it had worked out so well last time. Eventually, her destination rose from the horizon: Ponyville’s Post Office.   She reached the door and kicked it open.  A familiar face on the other side snapped to attention at the noise.  Derpy ‘Muffin’ Hooves rubbed the surprise from her eyes and offered a smile.  “Oh, hey Vinyl.”  She reached behind the counter and pulled up a large basket overflowing with one particular baked good.  “Muffin?” Vinyl trotted up to the desk, breathing heavily from so much running.  After an empty promise to herself to exercise more, she returned Derpy’s smile.  “No thanks I— actually, yeah.  A muffin would be killer.”  Vinyl grabbed a blueberry muffin off the top of the pile and shoved it into her mouth.  “Anyway, I need a favor.” “Sure, what is it?” Vinyl paused first to chew and eventually swallow. “What do you know about printing invitations?”