The sleeping alicorn winced her eyes to the sudden light filling the room, pulling her duvet up over her face with a soft groan as she struggled to remain hidden from the painful brightness penetrating her eyelids. “Twiiiiiliiiight.” She groaned once more, her ear flinching to the soft breath blowing down her vulnerable canal, with the voice vibrating the drum deeper inside. She rolled in her bedsheets, pulling them tightly over her face to mask every possible sense from being assaulted. “Twilight Sparrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrkle.” She groaned a final time as she coiled deep inside her bedding, wrapping herself in a cocoon of cotton blankets. Remaining that way for several seconds before Celestia's setting sun passed the perfect spot for a reflection off a nearby weather vane to shine directly into her bedroom. Her visitor angled the Princess' vanity mirror to shine the beam of light directly between the threads of cotton to penetrate her lavender eyelids.
Twilight Sparkle bucked her sheets violently as the light forced her awake, but still being inside the cocoon she bolted herself right off the bed, hitting the floor with surprising force. The impact caused her desk to shake and the precariously perched inkwell to topple over and cover her mane with a characteristic 'splodge'. She verbally voiced her pain and confusion with a selection of moans and random words before finally managing to poke her sleepy face out from the constrictive bedding. It took a few seconds for her violet eyes to adjust to the light, the impossible to describe blurring soon fixing itself into a vague form of colours and shapes before her iris finally focused on her hysterical visitor. The draconequus lay on his back in a fit of laughter, splintering the wooden floor with his paw as he continued his maddening fit of blissful schadenfreude. “That was absolutely priceless!” He managed to proclaim between choking breaths.
The lavender mare rubbed her forehead briefly from the miniature headache being induced, before responding with a tired groan. “What are you doing here, Discord?”
Discord suddenly flashed behind the tired mare and lifted her into the air with a tight hug. “I have come to visit my dear friend and Princess!” He stated, rotating his body to shake her either side.
“I didn't say you could come.” Twilight attempted to argue, her vocals struggling against the force of the hold.
“Oh Twilight Sparkle! I am hurt!” Discord overacted, throwing his talon to the air. “To think I, as your Best Friend wouldn't come regardless of being asked!”
The alicorn powered her horn to free herself, breathing deeply as she landed on her hooves. “You are far from being my best friend, Discord.”
“Oh?” The draconequus smiled widely, flashing out of existence before reappearing in front of the annoyed pony. “Then perhaps you see us as something greater? Perhaps, lovers?” He spun around her before suddenly pausing with a rose in his teeth, wearing a sparkling white suit with another rose in its pocket.
Twilight's jaw practically dropped before she reached a hoof to her forehead, rubbing it once more. “Are you trying to give me a headache?” She gazed back at her strange friend. “Why would either of us ever possibly want that?”
“So you are saying you are not looking for a Date, Sparkle?” Discord grinned as he flipped the rose from his suit, flapping it against the wind to change form into a sealed letter with a rose seal. His words clearly caught the attention of his friend as she attempted to hide a blush.
“I have no idea what you are talking about.”
“Alas you are probably correct! They must have simply gotten the wrong address!” Discord happily finalised as he angled the letter to be perfectly visible by the little alicorn, as soon as she turned to look at the company name adorning the letter, he swatted it from his fingers and out of the window.
“No!” Twilight yelled as she leapt across the room to catch the letter, suddenly being stopped by Discord's paw as he grabbed his prize once more. “That is a private letter I demand you give it to me!” Her voice muffled as she struggled to view through his fingers.
“I can't WAIT to see what's inside!” He giggled happily, bringing his talon to the letter's seal.
“That letter is private property! Opening that is a criminal-”
Discord's talon cleaved the seal in half with a single swift motion.
“Discord!” She yelled once more, clearly annoyed by his probing.
Discord cleared his throat before speaking in a mocking female voice. “Dear Twilight Sparkle, we are happy to let you know we have found a perfect match for y-” His vision suddenly became filled with an obsidian fluid as Twilight grabbed the letter from his talon, throwing herself onto the bed and levitating her sheets over herself for privacy. He brought his talon to his beard to contemplate the situation briefly before grabbing the inkwell off his face and placing it onto the table, flicking some of the ink from his eyes before clicking his fingers to return his natural manly beauty to his perfectly manly face. Eyeing himself in the mirror with a gratified grin.
“They found a match!” Twilight's muffled voice escaped the bedding, soon followed by a series of childish cheering and giggling. Discord floated above her in a laid back position, slowly descending to be by her side.
“Well how positively marvellous for the two of you.” The jester stated as he faked a yawn to reach his arm around the hidden mare, which easily earned her attention.
Twilight peered one eye out of the bedding to stare at her visitor. “Who did you tell about this?”
Discord scoffed the notion. “Why would I tell a soul Sparkle?” She continued to stare boldly at him. “What would I have to gain from that?”
“A laugh? Annoying me? Making me a laughing stock?” The cautious mare suddenly found herself being dragged out of the bedding with speed.
“All true!” Discord admitted as he pulled his alicorn friend to his side, pointing her towards her vanity mirror. “But I've already gotten that!” He smiled with a wide grin as Twilight noticed her ink stained mane, and then panned her eyes over to her pillow and bedding to notice the mess she had unknowingly made. “I have gotten so many good laughs from you, my pretty little Princess. I may be the LORD OF CHAAAAOOOS!” He paused briefly, gazing down at his friend. “You are meant to cheer here.” they shared a mutually frozen gaze before he finally gave in and clicked his fingers to allow for a train of chirping birds to pass through the window. “But do not forget Fluttershy has taught me all about friendship, and I am willing to help you with your date!”
“I am meant to believe that?” Twilight hissed, earning a swift powerful chuckle in response.
“Of course!” Discord kept her close with his talon as his paw panned the horizon. “Why would I lie to you?”
“Repeat my previous three reasons.”
“All true once more!” He spun around in circles while holding the mare by her front hooves, spinning her with great speed until she started screaming in panic. Only then letting her go with alarming speed into a magically conjured wardrobe, multicoloured clothing blowing out in mass from the impact. “Time for a Princess Fashion Parade!” he proclaimed, clicking his fingers to freshen Twilight's appearance.
Twilight scuffled through the pile of clothes littering the wardrobe, poking her head out the top of the sparkling mound. She was almost ready to complain once more before noticing the macabre excuses for rags and overly elaborate sets of armour around her, grabbing a helmet with her hoof which seemed to burn everything around it including her mane, causing her to drop it in sudden panic. “What are these even supposed to be?”
“Oh you ponies wouldn't know a good costume if it bit you.”
“Ouch!”
“Oh I'm so glad you found one!” Discord happily grinned as the confused alicorn pulled a crocodile cap off her tail. “So many wonderful costumes for your special day! In fact they are all so wonderful, how will we even choose?” He removed his paw from the seemingly infinite wardrobe briefly to scratch his handsome beard before snapping his fingers to the thought. “Of course! He placed his paw back onto the corner of the ruby door. “Let's spin on it!”
Twilight rubbed her aching forehead a little as her unwanted helper spoke until she realised too late what he meant. “What? No, Discord don't you dare even think-”
Discord drew all his might and forced his paw against the wardrobe, spinning it with dizzying speed almost breaking the sound barrier as Twilight's screaming seemed to ebb and flow the passage of reality from inside the magical box. “Who needs a theme park when you can have so much fun at home! Round and round and round and round she goes! Where will she stop?” The jester pulled out a chart from his beard to attempt to examine the dancing hieroglyphics before tossing it aside, clicking into existence a long cord of rope from the ceiling. “I certainly don't know!” He grinned as his paw yanked down hard on the tasselled rope, instantly stopping the spinning wardrobe and shooting the screaming alicorn through a flashing hole in the roof.
“Thank you so much for helping me with all my errands today Spike.” The beautiful white unicorn spoke in her usual elegant voice.
“It's really no problem Rarity! Twilight gave me the free day to spend as I liked.” The baby dragon replied back with a blushing smile, simply enjoying his time near the beautiful unicorn.
“And you spend your free day all on me? That is so charming my sweet little Spikey Wikey!” Rarity knelt down in a playful bow to her little admirer.
“Aww shucks Rarity, you know how much you being happy means to me.” Spike easily hid his now bright blush behind the mountainous pile of boxes he was carrying. As Rarity began opening the back door to Ponyville's boutique the baby dragon paused in contemplation after almost tripping into the previously unnoticed water. “Say Rarity, when did you build this pool in your garden?”
The now alert unicorn dropped the single jewellery box she was carrying as her share of the effort and turned to the pool in question. There was a perfect circle cut out of her back garden with coloured markings around the perimeter, with bright red circles leading near the centre to the word 'bullseye' “That is odd, I wonder if Sweetie Belle and her friends made it for their...” Her voice trailed off to a distant sound slowly growing in volume. She looked up into the orange skies where a small dot seemed to be flying overhead. “What is that?”
The distant sound quickly grew in volume as the dot also drastically increased in size as the object fell from the sky. “aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhHHHHHHHHH!” followed by an excessively loud 'Splash' was all either of them could make out before being drenched from head to hoof in the pool's water. Spike dropped the boxes from the force of the overpowering flood, shaking off the dampness from his scales before gazing into the pool.
They both stared with caution into the pool to the familiar colour deep in the centre which slowly rose to the surface. “That sounded like Twilight.” Spike spoke with concern before a hoof shot out of the surface, swiftly being followed by the rest of Twilight's upper body as her best friend and assistant helped her to the edge. “Twilight are you okay? What happened?”
The wet and tired mare coughed out a little of the fresh water as she rested her aching head on the side, suffering from her pounding forehead. “Never accept dating help from Discord.”
Rarity's mood beamed in joy as she heard her romantically challenged friend's words. “Oh Twilight Sparkle! You have a date?”
“What?” Twilight asked before holding her forehead again in pain, looking either side to make sure they were alone. “Keep it to yourselves okay? I was meaning to try and keep that a secret.”
“Oh Twilight you should know you never need to keep such secrets from me!” Rarity rubbed her best friend's hoof before turning to her admirer. “Oh Spikey, would you finish taking everything inside for me like a true gentlecolt?”
“Oh I'd much rather listen to this, this sounds awesome.” Spike replied, sitting himself down with his feet in the water.
“Spike!” Twilight bellowed.
“Okay! Okay I get it, girl talk jeez.” The baby dragon sighed softly wanting to know the rest of the story, pulling himself up to collect the boxes which Rarity's tranquil magic helped levitate onto his stack. “But I wanna know everything when I get back!”
Rarity waited until Spike had left before turning back to face her best friend. “Is it Eternal Hearts?” Twilight responded with a nod. “Oh it's about time! I was starting to wonder about them, what is your date like?”
“I don't know who she is yet, but they said she is a perfect match! Like all the stuff I wrote down seemed to match with her! Like she really loves the night and everything!” Twilight gave an awkwardly happy smile as she splashed her hooves in the water.
“Oh really?” Rarity questioned while keeping a positive face.
“Uhuh, here you can have a read through the letter yourself...” She patted around her wings where she usually held items before whimpering a little. “Oh no, I lost it!” She paused briefly before remembering everything that had happened so far since she woke up. “Or maybe it's at home, or Discord has it again.”
“Discord had your letter?” Rarity questioned once more, this time struggling to keep her positive smile.
“Yeah he had it briefly, you don't think he did anything to it do you?” Twilight suddenly began to tear up. “I mean, he said he didn't tell anypony about it and-”
“I'm positive he was just toying with you Dear, you know how he is.” Rarity petted the alicorn's mane, levitating a handkerchief near her sweet amethyst eyes to dab the tears from them. “You still remember all the information on it, correct?”
Twilight nodded. “They set up a date tomorrow night at 10pm at the Palace Walls Restaurant.”
“Oh what a romantically elegant place for a dinner date! Those garden seats are to die for and how much I've dreamed of eating at the royal table!” Rarity grabbed her friend's forehooves as she blissfully enjoyed her own thoughts, almost pulling her out of the pool before lowering her back in. “Oh, sorry I get a little carried away, that sounds so romantic! I'm sure your date will be absolutely perfect!”
Twilight Sparkle smiled to her best friend as she lay on her back in the soothing water to think. “But I need to reply to that letter, and for all I know Discord is now keeping it hostage.”
“Perish the thought Dear, let's just have Spike send them a new letter.” Rarity tested the water which Twilight was clearly enjoying with a hoof.
“I can't risk Princess Celestia seeing it yet! What if it doesn't work out? She'll think I've failed in my search for a relationship and will downgrade my next Friendship Exam!” Her worrying almost caused her to drop beneath the water as she staggered to regain her buoyancy.
“Don't you worry yourself Dear, I'm positive the two of you will get along just fine! Besides all you need to do is ask her to have a guard deliver it for you and she won't even know what it relates to!” Rarity lowered herself into the soothing pool, sighing happily as her body felt surrounded by a gentle warmth.
“You're right, but.”
“No buts Twilight Sparkle!” Rarity stated proudly. “You will be going to that date tomorrow and you will love every moment of it! You have waited more than long enough to find a suitable pony for yourself.”
“But.” Rarity held a hoof in the air, but Twilight continued regardless. “What if she doesn't like me.”
“Twilight Sparkle.” Rarity swam over to her best friend, brushing a hoof gently across her face while smiling into her violet spheres. “You are an absolutely lovable mare, there is nopony in all of Equestria I would rather spend my time with. You absolutely deserve the happiness you now have the opportunity to enjoy.” She continued to gently support her face before finishing. “Take the chance!”
Twilight blushed deeply to her best friend's words as they enjoyed the calm pool together. “Cutie Mark Crusader Dive Bombers Yay!” Three voices yelled in unison as three fillies splashed down into the pool, shocking the older mares to the edges.
“Hey Rarity! Great pool!” Scootaloo stated with a wide smile.
“Naw it's nothin' compared to mah families lake!” Applebloom retorted with a slight pout.
“It is so much more dignified though, right Sis?” Sweetie Belle swiftly backstroked over to view her sister's face from below.
“You girls shouldn't be diving, it's dangerous!” Rarity attempted to lecture her sister and her friends.
“Why would you put dive markers down if you didn't want us to dive?” Sweetie Belle questioned, still on her back with a hoof to her chin.
Rarity looked at all three of the fillies' reactions to her statement and grew curious. “Wait, so you didn't make this pool?”
Scootaloo raised her hoof out of the water. “Oh! Oh us two wanted it but Sweetie Belle refused to make it.”
“That's not true! I said she would like a pool Applebloom was the one to object!”
“Naw the both of ya objected to it, mah idea was to make it!”
“Not true!” The little unicorn squeaked again.
“Girls!” Rarity attempted to retake control to no avail as they continued to argue and began splashing water at each other, causing the older two mares to climb out of the firing line. “Well I have no idea who made this pool for me then.”
“I have a guess, considering He set everything else up for me today.” Twilight hissed slightly as she spoke about Discord.
Rarity couldn't help but giggle softly to herself before jumping to attention. “Oh! That reminds me, let us get to writing you that letter!” She lead her best friend inside as her sapphire aura levitated two towels from inside, she elegantly wiped the liquid from her own body before attempting to repeat the same to Twilight's ticklish coat.
“Stop it!” Twilight giggled like a filly. “I can dry myself.”
“Very well.” Rarity responded with dropping the towel over the lavender alicorn's head. “Now dry up and come inside.”
Both mares entered the kitchen to see three plates of half eaten poorly created meals Sweetie Belle must have prepared for her friends. Rarity entered first to levitate the hot water Spike had prepared for three cups of tea. “How many sugars would you like?”
“I feel like I could take twenty.” Twilight remarked as she rested her still tired head on the table.
“How about you Spike?” She called to the baby dragon entering the room, dropping an excessively large pile of sugar into the cup.
“Can I have a hot chocolate? With err, 3 teaspoons.” Rarity shrugged as she removed the teabag from his cup. “So Twilight, who's the special mare?”
“I guess I am, but I'm definitely going to need some actual sleep before the date.” The exhausted alicorn responded, bringing her hooves to her face to provide much needed darkness.
“No I meant who are you dating?” Spike jumped up onto the stool and placed his claw around the warm drink on the table. “Besides it's your fault for staying up so late, I keep telling you to sleep during the night then this won't happen.”
“How am I suppose to study the stars if I sleep through them like every other pony?” Twilight levitated a straw into her drink and bent it to flow into her mouth. “If Discord and Rainbow Dash would stop waking me then this wouldn't be an issue.”
Rarity sat beside her admirer with her own cup of tea, gently sipping it with finesse. “Spike would you write us a letter?”
“Oh of course, Celestia would love to hear about your date!” Spike happily proclaimed as he pulled a blank scroll from his pack. “What should I write?”
“Let's keep it secretive for now. So how about...” Rarity paused briefly as she tried to think of the contents.
“Dear Princess Celestia, can you kindly pass this letter to be delivered by Shining Armor once you receive it, it contains urgent personal family matters.” Twilight Sparkle recited.
“Then attach a second letter beneath that addressed to.” Rarity continued. “What was the name of the correspondent?”
“Tulip.”
“Dear Tulip of Eternal Hearts, I would absolutely love to go to this date you have set up for us tomorrow, I would love to hear more about this amazing match you have located and would love to know all about them as soon as possible! With thanks Twilight Sparkle!” Rarity finished smiling, waiting for the baby dragon to finish writing it down.
“Okay that's everything, so you don't actually know who she is yet?” Spike questioned as he coiled up the scroll.
“We had a little outside help, but we will know who she is soon enough.” Rarity replied with a cheerful smile.
Spike gave a deep breath as he aimed the two letters towards the window, igniting the emerald flames in his glands as his draconic might burst the scrolls into flaming ash which flowed out of the open window like a gentle breeze. “I really hope you are right about this.” Twilight whimpered softly, seeing the messages which could spell so much humiliation leaving them.
“Of course I am Twilight.” Rarity held her hoof across the table to comfort her. “Now we just wait for the response, and you make sure to rest up well for your big day!"
Princess Celestia lay in silence, the golden glow of her magic lighting the otherwise dim room as she wrote a letter to her favourite student. The dignified ruler of Equestria yawned softly as it neared her bedtime, enjoying the comforting sight of Luna's Moon rising in the moonlit sky outside her bedroom window. She returned her gaze down to the scroll she had almost finished as a green wind blew through the window and began to congeal above her. “Guess Who.” Her vision suddenly cut to black as the voice she knew so whispered into her delicate ears.
“Discord.” The tall alicorn responded with a distinct happiness, levitating an object from beneath her pillow.
“Oh! Am I really THAT predictable?” He grinned happily, taking his paw and talon from her eyes to share a compassionate gaze with his old companion. Twilight's letter appeared behind the large figure of the draconequus, allowing him to catch it in his talon without being spotted.
“Of course you are Discord.” Celestia continued, smiling warmly. “Which is exactly why I knew you would come to me tonight.” She leaned in to kiss her old partner.
Discord smirked as he held out his spare paw to stroke her beautiful face, closing his eyes as he enjoyed the moment. Before finding himself catapulted across the room and smashing against the wardrobe, opening his eyes to see only darkness from the weapon thrown against him. Celestia laughed heartily as her golden telekinesis faded. Enjoying the rewarding sight of her revenge fuelled flour attack hitting a perfect target. Discord removed the pie-dish before lapping up the baking flour from his face with a single wide lick. “I have missed how much of a Kick your lips give, Celestia!” He remarked while clutching the letter tightly behind is back.
“If you ever wish to feel that kick again, my hooves will make good on that desire.” Celestia concluded with a cheerful smile.
Discord slithered nearer the Princess to gently massage her horn with his paw. “Come and get me anytime you like.” He stated with a playful grin before leaping over her head and through the open window, exploding into a series of flashing streamers and fireworks.
Princess Celestia hid her smile until her old partner had vanished, finally allowing herself to sigh happily, rubbing her pampered horn. “Maybe one day.” She yawned softly, flying herself over to her much desired bed with no idea of the letter she was meant to receive.