Have you ever encountered an Emu? If you have, did you defeat it in the resulting battle? If you have, did the battle shake the world with it's intensity? Tell me about it.
...
Okay, I don't want to come across as this cantankerous old nag with no sense of humor. I love a good joke as much as the next pony, even if my former squadron might say otherwise. But at the same time, these are supposed to be my memoirs. So for your sake, I hope not all of your questions are going to be like this, Mr. Book. Otherwise, I'm going to throw you into the nearest thundercloud and let the lightning incinerate you.
To answer your question, no. I have not encountered an emu, nor have I fought one. I've had my fair share of world-shaking battles, though.
What did you do before the EUP? Why did you join the military?
Ah, now that's more like it. Well, for starters, I've actually been a military pony my whole life. Before the EUP was founded, I was part of the Cloudsdale Militia. See, before Nightmare Moon was banished, Equestria had no need for a unified military. Other nations knew that the Royal Pony Sisters were the ones who vanquished the reality-altering beast known as Discord, and most of them didn't want to provoke them. Of course, there were a select few hubristic idiots who ignored that, so we still needed to defend ourselves. Thus, each city formed small standing armies that were loosely connected to one another. We were all fighting for the same thing, but we all had our own command structures and whatnot.
As for why I joined the military, well, it's because of my role models. Yes, that's right. The great General Firefly had somepony she looked up to. Everypony has someone like that. And in my case, I had three. They were Commander Hurricane, Private Pansy, and my grandfather, Aquilinus.
There isn't a pegasus alive who doesn't know Commander Hurricane and Private Pansy. They were among the six ponies who founded our fine nation of Equestria, after all. But, few ponies know about their heroic deeds before that time. My grandfather Aquilinus was one of those few ponies. He served under Hurricane in the military back in the day, and he became something of a legend himself. He would often tell me stories about how he flew at Hurricane's side, fighting terrible foes such as the Locust King Abbadon and the nomadic Griffon Hordes. And when I listened to those stories, I always imagined myself being part of the action. I wanted to be out there, protecting my home and the ponies I cared about from those that wished them harm. So when I came of age, I enrolled in Cloudsdale's military academy and became part of their militia.
Now, my grandfather and Commander Hurricane were both combat-oriented ponies. They were knowns as being fierce warriors who led others to victory. Private Pansy doesn't have a legacy like that, and Grandpa Aquilinus never spoke about her in great detail. So, why do I admire her as well? Simple. She did something Commander Hurricane couldn't. She knew when not to fight.
That's right, I'm referring to the founding of Equestria as told in the Hearth's Warming pageant. That's one part of pegasus history that I didn't learn from Grandpa Aquilinus. No, he wasn't this old curmudgeon who was set in his ways and didn't get along with the other pony tribes. Trust me, you'd be hard-pressed to find a pony like that, even back when I was a young filly. It's just that he had a great amount of respect for Commander Hurricane. From what he told me in his stories, Hurricane saved his life on more than one occasion. Because of this, he always got a bit defensive whenever Hurricane was portrayed in a negative light. For a time, I felt that way, too. My young mind just couldn't comprehend a great warrior like Hurricane falling to some lousy snow spirits.
But as I got older, I began to see the importance of Private Pansy's mentality. Combat is not always an ideal solution. Sometimes, it's not even a solution at all. Private Pansy stretched out an olive branch when her CO refused to do so, and though she defied his orders, she managed to help Clover the Clever and Smart Cookie save all of ponykind from a wintery grave. Who wouldn't admire a pony like that?
Were there other careers you were interested in?
Not exactly. My mother wanted me to be an artist, but after I got my Cutie Mark, she knew it wasn't going to happen. I'm a military pony, just like my grandfather before me. And I wouldn't change a damn thing about it.
What do you look for and expect in future Wonderbolt members?
Well, first of all, that's not really my department anymore. You know, me being retired and all. But back when I was the Wonderbolts' CO, I did have a few things in mind when I was looking for new recruits. A lot of these traits were obvious, such as the passion to be your best and the skill to back it up. I looked for ponies who could think on their feet; ponies who didn't hesitate in the face of danger; ponies willing to serve and defend their country. However, there is one trait that I looked for above all of these. And that trait is that I wanted ponies who were team players.
Let's not kid ourselves, Mr. Book. Nopony is perfect. If I was looking for perfection, I wouldn't have recruited anypony. Even in a group of elite flyers, we all have something that we struggle with. So I wanted ponies who work together and overcome those flaws. Ponies who was compliment each other's strengths and cover each other's weaknesses. After all, there is no "I" in the word team.
I'll give you a perfect example from my days in the Cloudsdale Militia. This was my first taste of real combat, and yes, it was world-shaking. Or at least, I considered it to be such.
***
I was in the Mess Hall, just about to dig into a delicious chocolate cake when the alarm sounded. Part of me was upset that I was missing out on dessert, but at the same time, I was itching for some real action. I darted out of the Mess Hall and flew to the Briefing Room as fast as my wings could carry me.
It turns out my CO, Captain Monsoon, had just received a communique from the princesses. Weather patterns in the Neighgean Sea were becoming highly erratic. Several airships and sea-fairing vessels had gone missing in that area due to spontaneous water spouts and typhoons. Being a weather-related matter, it was obviously the duty of the pegasi to investigate, and Cloudsdale was already on the move. Truth be told, I felt very miffed by this. I was a soldier, not a weather engineer. Why did I have to be called away from dessert for something so mundane? I had half a mind to march up to Captain Monsoon and complain, but somepony held me back.
When I looked to see who was grabbing my shoulder, my mood didn't improve. She was a timid-looking pony with a powder-blue coat and pink mane with a yellow streak. Already, I could hear a shrill sound coming from her mouth as she tried to whisper to me. I knew she meant well, but as soon as I heard that sound, I could feel my ears start to burn and twitch. It didn't matter what she was going to say; she was bound to set me off.
Her name was Thistle Whistle. She was my childhood friend growing up, and she joined the Cloudsdale Militia the same time I did. Now, I call her a "childhood friend," but honestly, um, how do I put this? I didn't really consider her to be a friend at first. In fact, more often than not, she got on my nerves. See, Thistle's special talent was, well, whistling. And she would whistle whenever she got nervous. And she was a very nervous pony in general, always worrying about every little thing. Yeah, she wasn't the kind of pony you would want to be with for an extended period of time. Heck, I only befriended her because nopony else would.
And it was because of that damn habit of hers that we got in trouble that day. Though looking back on it now, it was really my fault.
Thistle whispered something to me, obviously trying to calm me down. I don't really remember what she said specifically, but that's because I wasn't really listening to her. But I could hear her. Oh boy, could I hear her. Every time she even said the letter s, she sounded like a squeaky toy you would give to a toddler. And her whistling directly into my ear only made things worse. Instead of calming me down, it only made me more agitated. Finally, I just couldn't take it anymore.
"Oh, for Pete's sake, Thistle! Shut up!" I boomed. "We both know I'm twice the soldier you'll ever be, so forgive me if I'm a little pissed that we won't be seeing any combat! I don't need a lecture from you, especially since you don't know what the buck you're talking about!"
That little outburst of mine got everypony's attention, including Captain Monsoon. As punishment, Thistle and I were assigned to investigate the weather anomaly, and we were to stick together as a wing pair. Suffice to say, I was not happy about that. I would've complained, but I was already in enough hot water. So I just saluted him while giving Thistle a dirty look. Already, I thought I knew how this would go down. I'd have to do all the work while making sure that Thistle was able to keep up. Thistle wasn't a bad flyer per se, but she always liked to play things safe. That was the opposite of how I did things, and I was determined not to let her hold me back. Especially not for a mission I believed was going to be just a routine weather check.
I couldn't have been more wrong if I tried.
***
It wasn't long before we were given the order to scramble. Thistle and I formed up behind Captain Monsoon as he flew out ahead. Right away, none of us felt right. The skies were grey and menacing, and the winds felt far too strong. It took sheer force of will to keep myself from shivering as the oppressive atmosphere chilled me to the bone. All the while, I had to contend with Thistle's nervous whistling as she shook like a leaf. I mentally prepared myself to do what I did best, hoping it would be enough to keep her out of trouble.
Suddenly, the great ocean seemed to open up before us as a giant whirlpool manifested itself. The skies above rumbled and crackled with lightning, throwing a lot of ponies off-guard. And then, she appeared out of the whirlpool.
She was the most foul-looking monstrosity I had ever laid eye on (at least up to this point in my career). From the waist up, she was a giant mare with six heads. Each head sported a unicorn horn pulsating with a different colored aura, and her wild manes looked like they had been made out of a mixture of storm clouds and sea foam. Around her waist, the heads of several hungry-looking wolves snarled and snapped their jaws. Below that, she had what looked like a long serpent's tail stretching all the way down to the bottom of the ocean.
I often heard legends about this creature from sailors and airship pilots alike, but until now, I always wrote those legends off as drunken ramblings. It was the great sea monster, Scylla. And her dark magic was interfering with the weather out on the high seas.
Two things came to mind at that moment. The first thing was excitement. I wanted combat, and now I got it. I was ready to show my stuff. The second thing was a strengthening of my resolve. I still felt it was my duty to give my wingpony the strength to hold her own while I taught this she-devil some manners.
See, my special talent is inspiring others. I am a beacon of hope, encouraging ponies to keep moving forward in the face of doubt. This is represented by my Cutie Mark: Two blue lightning bolts signifying both literal and metaphorical light. My maneuvers set the sky ablaze, lighting the way for ponies who don't have the courage to fight the darkness alone.
However, there's a downside to this talent of mine. And it's what almost claimed my life that day.
As soon as we were given the order, I charged ahead at Scylla. Magic erupted from her horns and seeded the clouds above. From them, large typhoons sprouted up. Many of us were thrown off-course by the gale-force winds, but I kept flying. I zoomed around Scylla's wolf heads, trying to distract them while the others counteracted her magic. Thistle flew at my wing the best she could, my guiding light giving her strength. Everything was going fine, but then, I got cocky.
The downside of my special talent is that I don't know when to back off. Fighting in the face of doubt is noble, but sometimes, a little thing called "reality" tends to get in the way. I'm actually quite lucky to be alive at this ripe old age with all the risks I've taken, and that's mainly due to my wingponies reining me in. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
After flying so close to the sea for a while, my wings began to feel heavy from the sea air. I tried my best to ignore this, as I usually do in situations like that. But as the fight dragged on, my maneuvers became sloppy. Suddenly, I heard a high-pitched whistle ring out from behind me. Aggravated, I broke off from my attack and made a beeline to Thistle.
"What in Celestia's name are you doing?!" I yelled, straining my voice over the multiple storms. "This is no time to be scared, Thistle! That monster needs to be dealt with, and—"
I was interrupted by a collection of piercing howls. Looking down, I saw that it was coming from Scylla's wolf heads. Soon after, the howls were drowned out by the sound of rushing water. A giant tidal wave erupted from Scylla's body, spreading out in all directions as she roared in pain. That sight shook me to my very core. My wings were so drenched with sea water that I couldn't have possibly avoided that on my own. If it wasn't for Thistle's nervous whistling, I would've been a goner.
As it turns out, the rest of the squadron had managed to counter Scylla's spells with their own maneuvers. That tidal wave was her last-ditch effort to take some ponies with her as she disappeared into the depths of the ocean. Slowly but surely, the skies cleared and the waters settled. Our mission was a success.
Yeah, I wasn't the one to land the final blow in that one. In fact, I was the only one brave and/or foolish enough to distract the wolf heads while the rest of the team did the heavy lifting. But I count that as a win in my book. Because I learned something important about teamwork that day. While I gave Thistle the courage to keep flying, she was able to let me know when things were getting too dangerous for me to handle. She saved my life, and because of that, I gained a new appreciation for her.
...
Where was I going with this? Oh, yes. What I used to look for in future Wonderbolts. Sorry, I tend to ramble in my old age. The point is that even if you aren't the best flyer in the world, as long as you have somepony who can make up for those weaknesses, you've got what it takes to be a Wonderbolt. At least that's how I felt; I'm not sure if things have changed since then. Just between you and me, Mr. Book, I hope they never do.