The Weed

by kudzuhaiku


A weed in Rock Haven

His leg itched inside of the plaster cast. Tarnished Teapot tried to think about everything but his itching and somewhat throbby leg. The wagon went over an exceptional sized bump; Tarnish struggled to stay upright and keep his balance.

Maud seemed to be moving at a brisk pace, but the destination was unknown. Tarnish had asked, but Maud had said nothing, changing the subject. Maud seemed to have two settings when it came to conversation and dialogue. Bare minimum and verbose. Tarnish, after a bit of self reflection, found that he could live with that.

Looking out towards the sun, Tarnish concluded that they had to be heading east. There was a dirt road of sorts, more of a trail than anything else, and the ground was flat here. To the north, mountains were visible in the far distance. To the south were hills and more mountains. They seemed to be in a valley. Tarnish could not help but to wonder where they were going.


There was a collection of buildings clustered around a crossroads. A nearby sign said “Fillydelphia” and had an arrow pointing along the east road. Above the words “Fillydelphia” there was another sign. This one said “Rock Haven” and the wood was a dull, faded grey.

Very much like the rest of the town. The buildings looked rather ramshackle and the town had seen better days. There were no signs up on the buildings to let outsiders know what the building was, what purpose that it served. This was a town that did not cater to outsiders.

“Come on, follow me,” Maud said as she began to walk over towards one of the buildings.

Tarnish took off as fast as his three legs would allow. There were a few ponies standing around, looking at him, very plain looking ponies with unreadable faces. Tarnish hoped that his magic would be on its best behaviour.


“Tarnished Teapot, this is Doctor Hedge. He is not only the town’s doctor, but also the postmaster, the notary public, the town’s primary means of law enforcement, and the mayor.” Maud turned towards Tarnish. “Doctor Hedge, this is Tarnished Teapot. He has a broken leg. I set it and put it in a cast.”

“Hmm, I should have a look at that,” Doctor Hedge said as he stepped forwards.

Tarnish started to protest, but was scooped up in Doctor Hedge’s magic. He found himself set down upon a table, which appeared to be a postal sorting table. He gulped, feeling nervous, and wondered what was about to happen.

“Full name?” the doctor asked.

“Tarnished Teapot.”

“Age?”

“Sixteen.”

“Hmm.” The doctor lifted up a clipboard and began to scribble something down. “Occupation?”

“Well, I uh, I was a—”

“He is my research assistant. I just hired him after an extensive interviewing process,” Maud said, her dull sounding monotone cutting Tarnish off mid-sentence.

“I see… rocktorate research assistant.” The doctor raised his eyebrow and peered at Maud. “I suppose you will be hoofing the bill?”

The stoic earth pony said nothing, but did make an almost unnoticeable nod of her head.

“And how did your leg get broken?” Doctor Hedge asked.

A heavy sigh slipped out of Tarnished Teapot and his head dropped down to the wooden table. “I was an idiot and I made a number of really bad decisions. It ended with getting quite a beating, having my leg broken, and being hung from a tree outside of Dodge City Junction.”

“I see.” Doctor Hedge turned once more to look at Maud, his eyebrow raised. He saw the earth pony give a faint nod. “I suppose that Maud here was the one who cut you down from the tree?”

“Yes sir, she was,” Tarnish replied.

“Maud’s mother and father raised her right. Of course she did,” the doctor said as a hard looking smile spread over his lips. “Dodge City Junction is a horrible cesspool of equinity. You’re lucky that all you got was a broken leg and a beating.” The doctor shook his head. “I hate to ask you this, but I am a very blunt pony. Did you sleep with any harlots? Dodge City Junction is riddled with diseases.”

All too aware that Maud was staring at him, Tarnish felt queasy as he nodded. It felt more awkward now than it did when he first had told her.

“Well then, a shot of penicillin and a few other injections are in order as well, just to be safe. I’d rather err upon the side of caution.” The doctor wrote down a few more things upon his clipboard.

“I feel really bad about what I did… I feel so guilty… I was on drugs at the time,” Tarnish blurted out. He then realised that he was doing nothing to help himself and his expression became one of mental anguish. “I had just gotten paid… I made some stupid decisions… I did something dumb. I feel really bad about what I’ve done… she wasn’t just some painted mare, she was also another pony’s wife… I was really, really stupid and I—”

“Look, it ain’t my place to judge. Son, we all do stupid stuff. When I got out of the naval academy and served aboard an airship, I did all manner of stupid stuff that I ain’t proud of now. Only what I did cost me my career in the service. So don’t feel bad, okay son?” The doctor’s hard expression softened.

“I feel so guilty and I feel awful because of everything that’s happened,” Tarnish admitted.

“Did you learn from it?” Doctor Hedge asked.

“Yes I did… I did learn something from it,” Tarnish replied. He looked over at Maud with pleading eyes. Maud’s expression was blank; impassive, and nothing could be read from it.

“Well, I need to cut this cast off so I can have a better look at your leg. You’ll need few injections, just to be on the safe side, and I think I’ll give you a physical while you are here,” Doctor Hedge said.

“I’ll be back in a bit. I have a few errands to do,” Maud said to Doctor Hedge. “See that he is well cared for. Thank you.” Maud paused for a moment and looked at Tarnish. “Oh, Tarnish, what is your mother’s name again?”

“Pinny Lane.”

“Thanks.”

“Maud, why do you need to know?” Tarnish asked.

The earth pony made no reply, but walked out the door, leaving Tarnish alone with the doctor. Tarnish sighed, wishing that Maud would have answered. He sighed and then resigned himself to be poked and prodded by the doctor.

When the door shut, Doctor Hedge looked down at Tarnished Teapot on the table. “I have known Maud all of her life. I birthed her into this world. Her sisters too. Now, I don’t claim to understand her, because I don’t, she is as mysterious as the day is long, but I can tell you this.” The doctor looked Tarnish in the eye. “She is a good pony. Don’t mess things up. She’s trying to help you. You let her. Do you hear me?”

“Yes, I hear you,” Tarnish replied.

“She was an odd foal. She never cried after she was born. Her parents worried that something was wrong with her. She was completely silent and as far as I know, she never, ever cried. Even when I gave her some vaccination shots… I stuck her in her backside and she just turned to look at me with that expression of hers. Not one peep. First time in my whole life I ever felt guilty about giving a foal a shot.” Doctor Hedge shook his head as he began to clear off the table. “She stayed silent for a long time… never talked. When she became a yearling, we all worried that she was mute. She never even tried to communicate.”

Tarnish watched the doctor stacking boxes in a corner.

“And then one day, she just started talking, like she had been doing it all her life, but she didn’t talk like a foal. She was like a teeny tiny adult in a foal’s body. She’s something.”

“She certainly is.” Tarnish felt his stomach muscles tense as the doctor began pulling out a number of syringes and what appeared to be a rotary saw. He gulped.

“Now, when I cut this cast off, I need you to hold very, very still…”