"Okay… nobody panic!" Dan shouted over the alarm. He grabbed the copilot's controls, trying to remember how Lightning had flown the Flutterbird. The craft shook forcing the occupants to brace themselves against the bulkhead. Just as Dan tried to regain control, the Flutterbird leveled out on its own. The alarm suddenly ceased.
"This is Crystal Control, auto-landing has been engaged," a stern female voice piped through the radio. "Get your hands off the controls, we'll take it from here."
"Nice of them to let us know!" Phoenix said sarcastically, still bracing himself against the side of the wall. Fluffle Puff clutched his left leg while Chrys clutched his right. He could've sworn he felt the changeling rubbing the inside of his thigh but… (I really hope that's turbulence. I REALLY hope that's just turbulence. Running… up and down my leg. Turbulence.)
Spike clung to Twilight now, holding on for dear life. One good thing she could use her wings for was keeping the baby dragon in place as he rode her back.
The craft stopped shaking. They were no longer in free fall. "Is everyone okay?" Twilight asked.
The three in the back nodded at Twilight, though they were still holding onto each other.
Dan, in the copilot's seat, had his arms folded. "Freakin' windowless white sky van. Guy asks us to trust him, then immediately bails out! Great way to start off a new relationship!"
"Dan!" Phoenix called from the back, "You might want to keep the chatter down!"
"Why?"
"That radio might still be-"
"Your pilot bailed out?" the female voice asked. "What about the copilot? What's going on up there?"
Twilight grabbed Dan's shoulder. "Lightning told us to trust him. It might be best not to let them know any details until he contacts us."
"You mean we're actually going to trust him?" Dan whispered.
Twilight nodded.
Dan sighed and picked up the headset. "Um, nothing's wrong, we're fine now, everything's fine. We just had a… slight navigational error. How are you?"
There was a static-silence on the radio for a long moment before the voice came back again. "Combat air patrols two and three, form up with the VIPs and escort them in."
"Roger, control."
It was impossible for any of them to see, even of the other Flutterbirds hadn't formed up behind them. Dan could barely see out of the cockpit and couldn't make out anything but shapes on the ground. But the lights and movement were enough to reveal the Magic Gears, dozens of them moving through the streets. Twilight was still fixated on the Crystal Palace, or, whatever it had become.
"I'm guessing this isn't how the Crystal Empire normally looks," Dan said.
"No, it doesn't," Twilight said. "This was the Crystal Empire… I'm not sure what it is now."
"Whatever Vice wants it to be," Dan remarked, folding his arms. "And I'm pretty sure he wants us to understand that. That's why he wanted us to see… all this."
"You're smarter than you look," the radio spoke again. "But your tour isn't quite over yet."
Dan wasn't surprised at this point, though Twilight was. "Aaaaand it gets worse."
The Flutterbird formation flew around the pillar of steel that was now the Crystal Palace, banking to see what was behind. Beyond the Palace at the outskirts of the city was a better-lit area and it didn't take them long to see why. Other Flutterbirds and Flitterbirds along with smaller and larger craft sat in neat rows, hundreds of them. Bulkier airship-looking craft were along the outsides of the rows, each one slightly larger than a Magic Gear itself. Several of the vehicles were under construction, lights from various towers and beacons on the ground illuminated the entire stretch of flat land in an eerie silver glow.
"It's… some kind of fleet," Phoenix said.
"An invasion fleet," Chrys remarked. "Believe me, I know an invasion when I see one."
"Thppppppppp-thbbbbb…"
"Look! Look!" Spike pointed. "By those blimpy things in the back!"
Twilight squinted to see what he was talking about. "Crystal ponies!" she exclaimed, relieved. Oh, thank Celestia, they're okay."
A few dozen crystal ponies moved about what now clearly resembled a massive heliport in front of them. Twilight was relieved to see that none of them had shackles, which would've been the case if they'd been enslaved by King Sombra again. They seemed to all be working on the various flight craft, refueling them, maintenancing them and preparing them for something. But as she watched them, Twilight began to feel less relieved. Something about this didn't feel right.
"We're beginning the landing sequence, so you might want to hold onto something."
The craft shuddered again, stopping its forward momentum. The feeling of descent quickly hit each of them in the gut, followed by the jostling bumps as the Flutterbird landed. Armor in front of the cockpit's viewport slid into place, preventing them from seeing out as the aircraft's struts finally sunk into the ground.
"You've landed. Get out."
Both doors of the Flutterbird popped open, as if the entire thing had been remote controlled the whole time. The group disembarked slowly, with Dan coming out last as they assembled on the tarmac.
"It's an entire fleet of windowless white vans," Dan remarked, looking around. "He's built an entire creep-fleet."
The others looked around themselves. The crystal ponies were mostly at the other end of the tarmac, a distance of several city blocks away from them.
Spike looked around. "So, where are we supposed to go now?"
"Administrator Vice Grip is expecting you at the Cogthedral," the voice from the radio said, this time coming from the Flutterbird itself. The group turned around to see the doors close on the craft and it take off again. "Proceed there at once and do not deviate from the main road. Security is watching you."
"We have to walk all the way there?" Phoenix asked as the Flutterbird flew away. "Why didn't it just drop us off at the palace? Or whatever it called it?"
"The "Cogthedral"," Dan reiterated. He looked up at the tower that seemed to stretch into the sky itself. They all looked at it, an ominous obelisk at the center of the city. Ahead of them, the road was almost pitch dark except for the glow of Sword Spells lining the curb on both sides. It allowed them only to see what was ahead of them and a little bit of the buildings on either side.
Dark clouds blanketed the skies all around them. Above the former Crystal Palace, however, the clouds were parted like the eye of an enormous storm. Pale light filtered down from above, reflecting the steel gray surface of the formerly pearlescent tower. A massive gear-shaped structure, roughly the size of the base of the palace itself hovered above it, rotating slowly. A quick glance at this structure revealed it was pouring out clouds from various spots along its sides, a massive cloud machine of some kind.
"So…" Chrys said, unenthusiastically, "who wants to travel down the sinister street up to the crystal clear palace of doom?"
"We are NOT walking down the creepy and clearly threatening road," Dan declared.
Spike pointed a thumb over his shoulder. "We could hijack another helicopter if you wanted."
Dan pinched his eyes and balled his fists, trying to contain his rage. Save it for later. "We are NOT taking another one of the windowless white NOW REMOTE CONTROL sky vans."
"So, what are we gonna do?" Chrys asked.
Dan kept his eyes forward. "Vice Grip's taken over so this is his place now. Here's the plan: one, we swipe everything that isn't nailed down. Two, we smash everything that is. Questions?"
Fluffle Puff retreated into her fluff for a moment and retrieved a large lootin' bag and a wizard's hat. "Thmmm-thbbbb." I shall get all the swag! Also, I am a wizard in this scene.
"Err-um, Dan?" Phoenix raised a question.
"Yes, Nicky?"
"Are we… we're not actually going to loot the Crystal Empire…" he looked at all of them. "Um… are we?"
Dan smiled. "Relax, ace. Twilight?" he turned to her.
Twilight actually looked as confident as Dan was. "As a royal guard, Dan is actually authorized to adjust public decorations and structures for safety reasons."
The shorter human patted Phoenix on the back. "And ya know what I think isn't? Vice Grip's security system."
"O-okay," Phoenix said, starting to understand. "So, we're going to steal the security cameras?"
Dan's smile only widened as he turned back to the main road. "Security cameras, motion sensors, trip wars, those floating robot thingies, gun turrets, armories and smoke, fire and solicitor alarms. Vice broke my security system, so I'm gonna break his," the human marched eagerly towards the dark street. Twilight and Fluffle Puff joined him, eager to get to the palace and start the mayhem.
Chrys leaned on Phoenix's shoulder. "Believe it or not Nix, this is the fun part. We're stealing back the Crystal Empire. Let's get going, cutie."
The lawyer's jaw dropped a bit. (C-cutie? Me? What?)
"Let's get going, Nicky! Lots to steal today!" Dan called.
"Yeah, uh,… you guys can focus on the stealing! I'll look for a way we can get it out of the city!" Phoenix yelled back, picking up the pace after them.
"I like where your head's at, Nicky!"
"Me… too." (I'm just hoping I can keep it attached to my neck.)
Dan and company walked briskly down the dark street, excited that they were finally doing something Vice Grip probably wouldn't expect them to do: loot. Yes, they all knew they were probably walking into a trap, not that they had a choice. But they were happy they now had a chance to swipe the cheese and maybe get away with it unscathed. If they disabled enough of the security cameras, that would probably help, anyway.
But the trap had already been sprung. Suddenly, the street underneath them began moving forward, towards the palace they were already walking to.
"What? What's this?" Chrys started panicking.
"Some kind of movable walkway," Dan said. "The kind they have at airports."
"Well, at least we don't have to walk now," Twilight said.
"Citizens of Equestria!" Vice Grip's voice echoed from loudspeakers throughout the city, "Your heroes have arrived!"
"The heck is he talking about?" Dan stopped walking forward, followed by the others. They looked around, puzzled, letting the walkway carry them.
"He can't be talking about us," Chrys said. "Can he?"
"But where are our manners? Ladies, assemble!!"
All around them, Magic Gears began landing at the sides of the street behind the Sword Spells. In two massive rows, the Gears lined up to face the street, glowing eyes illuminating the area further. In an instant, they assembled, two lines that led from where the road began all the way to the palace.
"Rejoice, Equestria, your future has arrived today. What we have all worked so hard to achieve is finally coming to fruition."
The Gears all stood at attention, an almost dizzying amount of metal ponies. Dan turned back and fourth, shock and confusion in what he was seeing. Not even he could take them all on at once and hope to succeed. And if there were so many, why did Vice even bother with messing with them?
"There's… so many," Twilight remarked. "How did they build them all?"
"We have worked hard to forge the tools that will build our future… and now have come the heroes who will use them! The new elements on which the future of Equestria, the future of ponies, the future of all of us will be built! Ladies, attention!!"
Each of the Gears in a simultaneous, unanimous, synchronized motion reached down to the Sword Spells at their hooves and grabbed them, one for each pony. In a single move, each Gear slapped the weaponized horns onto their heads and twisted them, locking each into place as they saluted. The Sword Spells glowed even brighter as they became the horns on each Magic Gear's head, matching their red eyes and bathing the street in a crimson aura.
"This… this is bad," Chrys remarked.
"N-new plan, guys," Dan said, voice wavering. "We swipe the keys to a bomb shelter first. A very, very fortified bomb shelter."
"Ah-I-I agree to that pl-plan," Phoenix seconded.
They looked in awe at each Gear as they passed, as the walkway underneath them continued to carry them through the street. Every one of the Magic Gears was unique, had a different mane style and different colors. Some were pegasi, some were earth ponies, still others wore heavy army and sported different weapons.
Dan and the others were baffled by the numbers and firepower until they noticed one of the Magic Gears with different-colored… and different-positioned eyes. One of the machines in the line had yellow glowing eyes and saluted but was holding a horn to her head rather than having a slot for it to attach to. Something about it made Dan stop and walked against the walkway for a moment.
"Hey… does that look like…?"
Unlike the others, this particular Gear's eyes were oddly off-kiltered; one looked up and the other down at the street, an expression that seemed familiar.
Chrys flew briefly back to Dan's position as the others were carried forward to see what Dan was seeing. "Huh… must be a mail carrier version," Chrys said.
"I guess so…" Dan said, stopping and letting the walkway move him forward again.
The Gear they were examining, still in salute, lowered its head to look at Dan and Chrys. "Hi!" it said cheerfully.
"Hi…" he replied to the robot. The two then let walkway carry them towards the palace once again.
"That was strange," Chrys said.
"Actually, I think that might be the only thing that makes sense about these things," Dan remarked.
The Magic Gear in question, Unit 420-MM(unofficially designated as "Fritzy") leaned forward in line and waved at Dan and the others as they passed. Unlike her sisters, when Fritzy had been built, she was less concerned with her primary directives and more interested in items her database identified as "muffins" and providing messages and deliveries to other ponies. Where this programming came from, neither her nor Vice Grip or any of the other Magic Gears knew but it was something her personality definitely compelled her to investigate.
As Fritzy watched the smaller, softer beings disappear from sight, she lowered her hoof and returned the Sword Spell to its place at her hooves. A subroutine Lightning Claw had installed upon her earlier quickly activated upon seeing Dan, Twilight and the others. This new order seemed a lot nicer than the others, instructing her to immediately depart for Saddle Arabia for some reason. Quietly while her sisters were distracted, she backed out of the line and made her departure. She had a letter to deliver, the thought alone making the machine feel happy.
The iron pillar that was the Crystal Palace grew larger as the group approached. The number of Gears didn't diminish, they even started filling in areas behind the first row at some of the intersections. The group's eyes continued to gaze in disturbed horror at each one of them. They felt more trapped, more threatened now than ever.
"This is really beginning to look like overkill," Phoenix said.
"I think overkill was an understatement two blocks ago, Nix," Chrys said.
"Why would Vice need so many?" Twilight asked the question they all thought. "There's enough warheads here to destroy Equestria…" the words came out of her in a hushed voice, as if she was afraid to speak them.
But Dan was done theorizing. "Whatever it is, his plan conflicts with mine."
"And that is?" Chrys asked.
"Because he plans on doing something with all of this. But I plan on breaking every single bone in his body."
"Well," Chrys began, "I think we know what Vice would say to that. I think he's saying it right now."
"And that is?"
"You and what army."
The walkway finally carried the group to the steps of the castle. The base of the palace was surprisingly well-lit compared to the other parts of the city with lanterns hanging on the legs that supported it.
"Looks like there's been some… remodeling done, here, too," Twilight said, disembarking the walkway.
"How so?" Dan asked.
"All this… this whole facade wasn't here last time," she said. The Crystal Palace was a massive structure, a colossal tower of normally pure crystal supported by three legs that curved up from the city streets into a modest base. Entrance into the palace itself was from these three legs and the area directly underneath the tower itself contained the Altar of the Crystal Heart. That's how it usually looked, anyway, but apparently some asshole had turned the entire base of the palace into a shopping mall.
"FIST Heartview Mall," Chrys read the illuminated sign above the entrance. "What's a segway?"
Underneath the sign were smaller, also illuminated words that read: Free Segway Rental & Parking.
"Vice Grip… turned the Crystal Heart into an attraction for a shopping mall…" Twilight said, heartbroken and confused. Her head sunk.
Dan stared angrily, or normally in his case, at the structure in front of them. "You realize we have to burn this down, right?"
Twilight continued sulking. "Yes…"
The entrance doors to the mall opened, lighting up the gray outside with fluorescent glow. Vice Grip rode out to the group on Cloud Nine. And a segway.
"Hello! Hello, all! Welcome!" he waved to them. "Now, I know what you're thinking!"
"How am I going to run you over with a segway? You were thinking that, too? Wow, we really do think alike!" Dan said in a delighted tone. "Why don't you bend over so we can get started?"
"Dan, calm down," Twilight cautioned.
"Would you like to be buried in the street, cremated or stuffed and mounted? I bet that neobrony7 guy has a few ideas!" Dan continued.
"Dan!" Twilight put a hoof on Dan's chest. "We do NOT break the fourth wall that way."
"What?" Dan asked. "I like shout-outs. And we just walked through an army of NUKES! Now there's a SHOPPING MALL and the bad guy's on a segway! If I don't get to blow up at least HALF this garbage by the time this episode arc is over, I'm going to MAKE this place wish it had disappeared for another thousand years!"
"DAN!" Twilight yelled. "Shout-outs are fine… once in a while. But we can't be that openly violent, not when Vice hasn't done anything wrong."
"Anything… wrong…?" Dan shook. He pointed behind them. "WHAT DO YOU CALL THAT?!"
"The future," Vice answered for him, dismounting the segway. "And you're thinking, 'why didn't he do this sooner'?"
"More like, why was this necessary?!" Chrys yelled.
"Hahaha!" Vice laughed. He walked towards them, metal boots creating tremors in the pavement. "It is magnificent, isn't it? A thousand units, the magic number, indeed! It wasn't easy what's worth it never is!"
"Vice Grip, this is wrong!" Twilight said. "One of these things nearly destroyed Ponyville, another one nearly destroyed Canterlot! Why are you doing this?!!"
"We KNOW why!" Dan yelled, stomping forward. "You HATE alicorns, you HATE unicorns, you HATE the magic of Equestria! You're going to use each one of these to destroy it all and take control yourself! That's the future you're trying to create!"
Vice chuckled again. "The future I'm trying to create? No, Dan," he patted the human on the shoulder. "That's the future you are going to create."
Dan shook his head. "What?"
"After all this time, you still think I'm planning on nuking Equestria, don't you?" Vice asked them.
Their heads nodded, Fluffle Puff uttered an affirmative thppp.
"And you're not wrong," Vice informed them an a casual tone. "I do hate the princesses… well, most of the princesses and I'm generally not fond of magic-users. But I'm a scientist, not a warlord and what I look for are long-term solutions."
"What are you talking about?" Phoenix asked. "Solutions to what?"
"To magic," Vice explained. "I hate the fact that magic itself seems to have convenient little destinies for us all to abide to. Magic itself has plans, and all must render unto the princesses' rule. And yes, killing the princesses did occur to me. But that wouldn't solve the problem. And you already know why."
They didn't. Vice waited for them to guess but… none of them did.
The scientist rolled his eyes. "Because Equestria will just make more alicorns! Kill one another just takes its place. No, I want a REAL future for Equestria! An Equestria where anypony can decide their own destiny free of kings, free of rulers, free of magic!"
Dan's eyes went wide. "No… you can't be serious."
Phoenix was next. "No…"
Vice turned to them, fire behind his eyes. "I was planning on ambushing precious little Tia with the first Magic Gear some time ago when who should contact me but Princess Luna. And she told me there was a world, another world just on the other side of our own, one of many. And she was scared by it."
The understanding hit Twilight. "Luna… she saw…"
"Princess Luna was terrified by what she saw there. So much so that she contracted ME to try to find a defense for it, a measure of defense for it. So, I showed her my invention, the first Magic Gear and even gave it to her as a gift to make her feel safe. But what if I could make us both feel safe? What if there was a way to accomplish both our goals… at the same time?"
"You can't."
Vice laughed again. "Of course I couldn't! But it had to be perfect, nothing could be left to chance so I requested that Luna summon someone, a human that would understand. And it couldn't be just any person; it had to be a human that hated his own kind, that hated other people so much that he would be WILLING to wipe them all off the face of the Earth!!"
Twilight turned to Dan. "But… that would mean…"
Dan shook his head. "No. No, I'm not doing it."
Vice smiled at the human. "Humans do not just appear in Equestria for no reason; they're summoned here for a purpose. Luna contracted me to provide the perfect defense for Equestria, Dan. And that's what Magic Gear is for. That's why they're perfect!" he stepped forward. "Because there's no defense like a good offense."
"You were planning this all along…" Phoenix said, stepping back. "You're planning a preemptive strike on Earth."
Vice shook his head. "Once again, you fail to fully grasp the situation. I'm not planning on doing anything, Dan. You are."
"What does that mean?!!" Dan raged. "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!!!!"
"The answer's been staring you right in the face this whole time…"
Dan Vs. The Magic of Friendship
Dan is Vice Grip
"Oh, and I'd like to give a shout-out to Booster Spice and Mr. Dollars," Vice said, grinning at the camera. "Betcha didn't see that coming."