//------------------------------// // Blood - Bath - Time // Story: Hard Court Press // by Hillbe //------------------------------// Blood - Bath - Time Spike sat up to see a picknic setup next to him more than the whole gang was invited AJ, Big Mac, Rainbow, Twilight, Fluttershy The Crusaders . Rarity took Spike in her magical aura and lifted him up for a general inspection. Seeing his appearance she gasped "Spikey you're absolutely filthy what in Celestrias green world have you been doing?" The Crusaders answered for him "He's been with us". She let out a sigh "Apparently so, What no tree sap?" Twilight looked around "Where's Pinkie?" "She's giving some pesky reporters an interview at Sugar Cube Corner" The Crusaders laughed "Mostly trash and frosting". Twilight and the group laid out on the red checkered square blanket passing out the refreshments. Scootaloo bit a cookie and asked "Twilight why are those pesky reporters chasing Spike when they should be going after Rainbow for the real awesome stories?" Twilight giggled "Those so called reporters are worse than Gabby Gums and you saw what happened there". The three Ex-Foal Free Press writers knew the drill "Yeah. . .We're still sorry for it". Everypony and the drake were waiting for the Element of Laughter to make her entrance. Spike was already crunching on some gems, Apple Jack was nipping a flask of cider to her misfortune Dash spied her favorite swill. "Hey AJ pass that this away" Rainbow asked with pleading eyes. "I only have a little bit here" AJ teased. "Aw come on I only want a little sip. . . please pretty please?" laying on the sad puppy dog eyes with alligator tears. "Ok it's against my better judgment only a little nip we haven't eaten yet you understand?" AJ raised the flask. Rainbow dashed across the blanket and greedily snatched up the flask in a flash she raised it to her lips and chugged the ice cold golden liquid, her eyes went wide as she swallowed every drop of apple vinegar. Apple Jack burst out laughing as Rainbow Dash turned lovely shades of pink and green. "Always think before you drink" AJ said as she pulled out a bottle of the real stuff snickering at the sight of RDs little spitting fit. The others watched the prank fizzle out and the good stuff was passed around Rainbow sniffed the rim before she once more took a sip of authentic golden nectar. "Ah that's more like it!" Rainbow sang as her taste buds were rewarded. A cloak covered Rarity sat with her back to the bunch Spike looked as if he was slowly nuzzling her. Twilight was nibbling a daisy sandwich when out from the basket Pinkie popped up. "I'm here!" Pinkie spread her hooves and cartwheeled through the group streamers and confetti blowing in the wind. "It's about time you showed up" Twilight fumed "We all were starving waiting for you". "Oh it's no fur off my flank you should of started anyway" She took a Celestia sized bite out of the cake in her hooves. "I was being interviewed by those pesky poopy pants reporters they wanted the big scoop really bad". Twilight and the rest let out a collective gasp. "What did you tell them? " Spike only groaned. "Awe nothing special mostly trash talk I had them cleaning up the garbage they spilled all over Sugar Cube Corner". Pinkie smiled a reassuring smile "Am I the only one who can keep a Pinkie Promise?" Spike and Rarity dozed off in the warm sun the now Spike felt good he felt real good. They awoke with haze topped with gray storm clouds nopony else was around Spike looked up at Rarity and started chuckling she was wearing an evening gown trimmed in hemp browns and tans piped with orange trim her hat was a dandy lion puff ball, finishing the outfit was a fresh set of used green combat boots covered in mud. Spike couldn't hold it back, laughter echoed out to all points of nothingness Raritys eyes looked in horror at the crime against fashion she herself was displaying but Spikes outfit was just as outlandish covered in glitter it resembled a dinner jacket and thong arranged in the most unflattering way Rarity wanted to flee in panic her world spinning out of control she awoke back at the gathering with a snort and a start wishing that her Spikey was spared the daymare she had just moments ago. Spike snored on. "Spike, Master Spike" Spike watched Rarity dissolve into a cloud of colorful butterflies they caressed his scales tickling like numerous light ladylike kisses. He froze and slowly turned to face the voice "Luna?" "Yes it is I you still slumber Sir Spike. . . Be warned what you share is seen by some as a threat, Celestria has informed me to relay this message be vigilant and on guard we need time to find the wolves in the fold do not tell a soul of my warning ". "Luna how is Raritys foal a threat to Equestria?" She looked at him with understanding "Some fear change no mater how insignificant. . .small, Spike those in power fear a loss of influence power or fortunes a Earthpony-Unicorn-Pegasus triad. The status quo is soon to be challenged just from one act of love. The Element of Laughter calls your chil..." Pinkie pops into their view "Dracony, Long Ma, Qilin, Kirin, Pongon, Half breed, Scaleycorn, Unidragon, Ponygon, Rarispike, Sparity Oh if its a boy will it be a dolt? Colton, Quilt? or If its a girl a filly stake and cheese sandwich? Yummy!" She faded from sight, Lunas eyes twitched "I'll never get used to that-her um, where was I?" she tapped her cheek "I got nothing". Spike sat up "Ah wasn't it something about the nobles being upset at us?" Luna let out a sigh "Yes be warned and be prepared we shall contact you with further instructions now it is time to awaken you don't want to miss out on the cake". "Cake? Aren't you supposed to be asleep at this hour and what's the shiny thong stuff anyway?" Luna laughed "I am asleep Sir Spike as for the attire it's my dream is it not?" Anonymous screams rang out as Spike woke up "Blood blood everywhere look that dragon attacked a helpless mare!" Flashes of cameras and screams continued Spike looked at Rarity and she to him. They both saw the 'blood' crimson on her muzzle and neck and red oozing from Spikes Snout the flashes increased in volume confusion was king and the paparazzi queen time crawled for Twilight and the rest. Spikes forewarning and instincts took over he growled at the flashes smoke pouring out of his nostrils Rarity gripped Spike and yelled "STOP!" a little too late. An emerald fire ball engulfed half of the photographers as the other half fled into the bushes trailed by the Royal Guard. "Spike what have you done?" Rarity wiped her muzzle the ruby slurry smearing into her face. "Sorry Rares I got a little protective" He took his claw and wiped her muzzle clean and stuck his ruby syrup sopping claw in her mouth "I'm sure Celestia will know what to do with a room full of paparazzi". The smoke wafted overhead of the Princess of the Sun "Oh how nice a letter from Twilight". One by one ponies with cameras fell from the cloud of emerald smoke with every landing came a flash and a splash. The Princess of Equestria eyes twitched as she lowered her wash cloth and rubber ducky Guards !. . .Summon thee Royal Guards!