//------------------------------// // Chapter 1 // Story: Dog Days of Celestia // by Cloperella //------------------------------// The sun filled the regal city of Canterlot with a gentle brightness, having only made it over the horizon just an hour ago. Overlooking the busy city itself was the castle, the capital of Equestria itself, and home to its two princesses. In the left quadrant of the castle, located between the towers of the sun and the moon, was the Tower of Stars; the third highest structure in the castle, and just above the castle’s observatory. Within the Tower of Stars sat a group of ponies at a marble desk. In front of them were folders and stacks of paper, as well as a few cups of coffee. They kept to themselves without a word in between them, staring at the table or the ceiling of the room, sometimes stealing a glance at the clock on the wall. The sound of a turning knob caught their attention, and they moved their gaze to the opening door of the room. They looked to see the tall white form of Princess Celestia stepping through, with a wide look of cheer on her face. “Good morning, everypony!” She greeted aloud as she walked into the room. “I apologize for my tardiness; one of my hairstylists is new, and she had a teensy bit of trouble working her brush through my mane.” “Oh, of course your majesty.” A disgruntled male voice replied to her. “Equestria would just fall to pieces if her highness were to suffer a split end.” Celestia felt the bottom of her left eye twitch as she stared at the red maned stallion, his upper body dressed in a gray military coat. The coat itself was decorated in so many ribbons and medals, Celestia wondered how the stallion was even able to carry himself around without falling over. “Nice to see you too, Sergeant Spearhoof.” Celestia replied, her smile returning as she imagined the stallion falling on his face with the addition of yet another medal on his chest. A brown maned mare wearing a dark red blazer with pink buttons at the top cleared her throat, just as the stallion had opened his mouth to say something else. He crossed his hooves and turned away as the mare shot him a disapproving glance. “Good day to everypony. Very nice to see you, your majesty.” “Thank you, Mrs. Honeysuckle.” Celestia said to her Chief of Treasury , as she walked past the ponies she was addressing to the other side of the table. On her way to the front, she nodded to the short maned unicorn Bowl Cut, the Chief of Homeland Wellbeing. Even though she kept her smile plastered on her face, she was rather frustrated that she had hardly been in the room five seconds before Spearhoof was on her case about something. She reminded herself that despite his barking, there was little bite that he could lay on her, and took her seat. “Now I realize that these meetings can be quite taxing, so let's just see if we can get through the items on today's agenda without problems and we'll all be on our way.” Celestia slid the manilla folder at the center of the table towards herself with her magic, and pulled the front open. “Which of you would like to go first?” The three ponies in front of her exchanged glances. Mr. Bowl and Mrs. Honeysuckle looked towards Sergeant Spearhoof hesitantly, but the stallion shrugged, motioning a hoof towards them dismissively. “I suppose I’ll start us off with a report of the nation’s economics..” Mrs. Honeysuckle voiced gingerly. Celestia rummaged through the papers in her folder until she found pages with more numbers and figures than the others. “First of all, I'm happy to report that Equestria as a whole isn't experiencing any concerning drops in stocks or financial worth. Most everypony has a job and a roof over their head, so things are looking great on that front.” “Well, that's wonderful.” Celestia replied, nodding appreciatively. “...But?” “But, Maretonia hasn't shown any signs that they plan on paying back the loan that they owe us, after defaulting on it half a decade ago.” Celestia rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Shocking.” “Indeed. If they don't pay it back in the next few years, we might need to start making certain cutbacks on the nation.” “Well, fretting over what might happen in the next few years isn't going to help anypony. I'll see if I can keep in mind some ways to save bits in the future, but for now there's nothing we can do.” Mrs. Honeysuckle nodded empathetically, as Celestia rummaged through the files in her folder. “I guess it’s my turn then.” Bowl Cut adjusted his glasses resting on the bridge of his snout before he began. “Going off of Honeysuckle’s report of finances and jobs, the majority of the nation seems to be well fed. In fact, I think some of them might be a little too well fed.” Celestia rose an eyebrow at his odd quip before he continued. “Reports have been coming in from medical facilities all over the continent concerning their patients body mass intake. While it hasn’t reached a dangerous level, doctors are noticing that their patients are getting a little heavier as time goes by.” Celestia nodded knowingly. “The price of a life of leisure. While I respect the brilliant minds who have invented the technology to make our lives easier, it seems to have relinquished the need for the citizens to exert themselves regularly and keep a healthy physique.” The princess tapped a hoof to her chin, taking a moment to ponder the situation. “Two things need to be done, Bowl. First of all, we need to snip the problem in the bud before it has a chance to bloom. Starting at the end of the fiscal year, I’m going to set in a new law that requires grade schools to teach a proper nutritious diet to young fillies and colts.” Bowl Cut’s horn illuminated, as he quickly scribbled a paraphrased rendition of Celestia’s instructions to him. “And for adults, I think a simple brochure or pamphlet with a summary of healthier alternatives would be fine. See if you can put something together, and have doctors administer it to all of their patients during their next visit.” “Will do, your highness.” Bowl affirmed, clicking his pen closed. “Right, with that out of the way, last comes my favorite item on the agenda, national security.” Celestia flipped through her folder until she found the appropriate pages. The first thing that caught her attention was the picture of a large object that somewhat resembled a cannon.“Ooh, this looks like a very fancy weapon Spearhoof.” Celestia remarked. “But whatever would we use it for?” “For defense against enemy threats, of course.” The stallion responded gruffly. “After all, our nation is one that finds itself threatened three times per year. I think we could use an increase in the weapons we use, as well as an increase in active soldiers.” “Sergeant Spearhoof, when our nation is threatened, it's under attack by something that's a force of nature that can only be stopped by Twilight Sparkle and the other elements. Do you really think that a weapon like this would stand a chance against a villain like Tirek, if one were to appear?” “Well, we don't know if we might be threatened by the other nations at some point.” “Equestria has kept peaceful relations with other sovereign nations for half a century now. I see no reason that we should make unnecessary preparations for a nonexistent war.” “If I may your highness-!” “You may not.” Celestia cut the sergeant off swiftly, and his only response was his hoof pounding against the desk in frustration. “Well, is that everything then?” Celestia allowed herself to feel excitement that this meeting might actually end more quickly than meetings past. “Actually, there is one last item that we didn't document, your majesty.” Mrs. Honeysuckle said as she lifted a notebook onto the desk. Celestia had to suppress the urge to groan as she nodded towards the mare. “If I'm not mistaken, your sister's birthday is coming up in the next few weeks. And I think it's very pressing that we receive your majesty's orders on what kind of cake she'll be receiving this year.” Celestia's face lit up as she felt genuine excitement for this new item. Yes, a very pressing item indeed. The two of them had lived through so many birthdays already that Celestia considered it a challenge to outdo what sort of cake she presented to her sister year after year. “Well, to match my sister's coat, we'll need something dark. That means we'll either be sticking with chocolate, which would be just fine. Or... do they make a raspberry cake?” She asked, while Honeysuckle took notes. Before the mare could answer, the door to the meeting room was pushed open. “Your highness?” A royal guard called to her. “Ms. Silver Frame has been waiting in the reception hall for some time. She says she was promised an audience with you this morning, and she’s becoming rather impatient.” Celestia rolled her eyes at the mention of the name. “Tell her I’m busy with more pressing matters, and I will see her when they’ve been concluded.” “Yes, tell Ms. Silver Frame that she’s being made to wait while her majesty discusses the importance of a birthday cake.” Sergeant Spearhoof interjected in a biting tone of voice. “I’m sure she would understand.” Within her closed mouth, Celestia’s the rows of Celestia’s teeth were grinding against one another in frustration. Breathing defeat from her nostrils, Celestia rose from her seat. “I shall leave it to you then. Have a wonderful day.” Celestia forced herself to trot towards the doors. As she passed Sergeant Spearhoof, her large white wings extended outwards, and the one on her left smacked the stallion in the back of his head. “Ouch!” he winced, rubbing the back of his head from the pain. “Oh goodness, I’m so sorry!” Celestia apologized over-drmatically, before breaking out into a giggle. “These things seem to have a mind of their own sometimes.” Celestia resumed her march out of the doors, while the sergeant glared daggers out of the corner of his eye to her. Before the doors closed, she could hear Honeysuckle speaking up again. “Now then, whether we go with chocolate or raspberry, we definitely need to line the edges of it with white chocolate moons.” She heard her say, before the doors finally shut. Celestia felt a tightness in her chest, as well as a rumble in her stomach. Feeling her annoyance spike, she hoped that whatever she was being summoned for had a good enough reason for her to miss out on what they were discussing without her. “And as you can see your majesty,” the Earth pony mare drolled on as the stallion to her right pointed to various charts and graphs on a white board behind them. “Many ponies in Canterlot have found a chance to work and earn money thanks to my yachts. The boats themselves are almost as large as the castle itself, so as you can imagine, it needs quite a work force to keep it running smoothly! Of course, I'm more than willing to pay all my employees a handsome wage for their services.” Celestia hardly paid any mind to Silver Frame. Legends spoke of how the princess's patience was as eternal as the sun itself. If those legends were at all true, then Silver Frame's inherent obnoxiousness transcended mortal capabilities. Rather than listen to her ramble on about her expensive yacht, Celestia instead found her eyes wandering about the glossy magenta walls of her throne room. She admired one of the stained glass windows, the one with the sun shining down from the heavens above onto the surface of the Earth. Back in the the medieval days, Luna had been so interested in the planets many light years away, and so Celestia had made this one specially for her when it was Luna's turn to sit on the throne during the night. However, Celestia's personal favorites were adjacent to the one depicting the astronomical bodies. They were the ones featuring Twilight Sparkle and her friends, saving Equestria from eternal night or chaos. She adored staring at these works of art, admiring how much her former student had grown into a princess worthy of bringing the light of friendship to Equestria. Reminiscing about Twilight’s journey to royalty brought warmth to her heart, which helped her endure such dreadful presentations as these. “What do you say, your majesty?” Silver Frame asked, finally concluding her long-winded lecture. Celestia forced herself to stop looking at the work of art and back to the mare in front of her. Though she hadn't taken in a word that she said, she already knew what the mare was after. Silver Frame had visited her four times previously this year, and each time she had been seeking a deduction on the amount of taxes she owed. And from what little Celestia had heard this time, Silver was trying to claim that she was a “job-creator” and since she was paying so many employees on her yacht, she deserved a tax break. Celestia wasn't a fool. She knew that Silver Frame's yacht was hardly doing anything to stimulate the work force of Equestria. Those employees were paid quite little for all the hard work they went through to keep their jobs, and it was not nearly enough for them to live comfortably. “Well, that is very nice to hear.” Celestia replied with a fraudulent smile. “I'm glad that you've found so many ponies to work on your big fancy yacht. But I'm afraid that isn't going to give you any deductions in the taxes that you'll end up owing.” “But- but your majesty!” Silver Frame moaned, putting a hoof to her yellow sun hat. “What about all the ponies I'm paying to work? Can't I get a little bit of help while I'm helping them?” “I'm afraid not.” Celestia feigned a look of sorrow as she looked down at Silver. While her face appeared sympathetic to the aristocrat, her eyes remained stern and unmoving, projecting to her that it was not happening. “Hmph! Very well then.” Silver Frame tilted her head up and turned about, the short stallion folding up the chart and walking close behind her. Celestia breathed a sigh of relief once the ponies were out the door. While one of her guards announced the next guest to see her, Celestia counted her blessings that at least Silver Frame was gone, and that she would not have to see her again, at least not for a few more months when she tried yet again to plead a new case to Celestia. A dull pain surfaced in the front of her cranium, like her brain was being pinched and kneaded into dough. The princess lifted her hoof and rubbed her temple, a vain effort to soothe the headache that was building within. The sound of faint clip-clopping snapped Celestia back to reality, and her attention was drawn to her next guest entering her throne room. To her delight, this didn't appear to be a snooty aristocrat trying to win favor with her. Trotting briskly along the red carpet was a small unicorn filly with dark black hair and a pink coat. Behind her was a cart covered in a sheet, which she pulled along its wheels by a rope with her teeth. Even though her mouth was occupied, she still wore an eager smile as she looked toward Celestia. “Oh, hello there little one!” Celestia greeted her warmly as the filly drew closer to her. Her exuberant presence helped Celestia forget about the pain in her head for a moment. “What can I do for you today?” The filly looked away for a moment, and took a deep breath. Celestia understood that anxiousness was unavoidable when they met her for the first time. She did wish she could do something to put them at ease before they met her, but after centuries of ponies shaking in her presence, she realized the nerves just had to run their course. After composing herself, the filly looked back to Celestia with more energy than before. “It's not about what you can do for me, your majesty; it's about what I can do for you!” The filly shouted at the top of her lungs. Celestia's eyes popped open wide in surprise at the projection the filly's voice carried; she was at least a yard away from the princess, yet Celestia's ears still stung from the volume of her powerful voice. “Are you tired of cookies that crumble as you pick them up!? Can't wash that bland taste down no matter how much milk you chug!? Then I've got the solution for you! Hi, Filly Neighs here, with my one of a kind Crazy Captivating Confectionery Cookies!” The unicorn's horn lit up, and her magic lifted the tarp off of her wagon. Now uncovered, Celestia could see an ornate display of plates of cookies laid out for her to behold. “Why, just one bite, and you'll go CRAZY from how delicious they are!” Celestia's head resumed throbbing with her headache once again, as did her ears from the sheer volume that the little filly spoke at. Nevertheless, the corners of her mouth remained upward, fixed in a smile as she listened to little Ms. Neigh's presentation. “And of course, as any professional food salespony would do, I'm more than happy to share a sample of my work with her majesty!” Filly Neighs exclaimed, using her magic to levitate a chocolate chip cookie towards Celestia. “Please, help yourself! I promise your taste buds will be more than satisfied!” Celestia inspected the confectionery in front of her. She realized that it was as big as her own hoof, perhaps even bigger. She was impressed that somepony her age was able to bake something that size. “Thank you for the offer, little one.” Celestia replied, her eyes darting back and forth from the cookie to the eager unicorn. “But I've only had breakfast a few hours ago; I don't think I have the room for this.” The jaw of the unicorn dropped in shocked disappointment. Without a word, her head tilted down, and her front hooves pulled in together. Though she remained silent, Celestia could read her face and all the thoughts behind it: She had put her heart into making those cookies, and worked so hard win an audience with the princess. And now that she was here, she learned that the her majesty didn't even want to give her baked goods a chance. Looking closely, she could see Filly Neighs lips beginning to tremble. No no no no, please don't cry! Celestia internally begged, a slight ache creeping up in her heart. “Well, I suppose I might have... a little bit of room.” Celestia said, as she looked back towards the enormous cookie. She leaned her head in and took a bite of the treat. The unicorn's head lifted up and her eyes shimmered as she watched Celestia chew the confectionery. Mm... that's pretty good, actually. Celestia thought, before she swallowed. She looked at the unicorn's happy face, but it was blocked by the partly eaten cookie being swung in front of her view. Oh, she wants me to eat the whole thing. Alright then. Celestia took several more bites until the cookie was gone completely, down Celestia's throat and into her belly. “Well, you're certainly right dear, that was...” Celestia took a deep breath through her nostrils, mentally preparing herself for what she was about to say. “CRAZY good!” She wasn't sure if it was a part of her soul being choked or possibly the weight of the large cookie hitting her stomach, but Celestia felt herself cringe after uttering that crafted praise. “Well, if your majesty likes that, then not to worry, there's PLENTY more where that come from! Crazy Captivating Confectionery Cookies comes in a variety of flavors!” Filly Neighs began to levitate one different looking cookie after another towards the princess's face. “I have chocolate chip, caramel, cinnamon, chocolate, double chocolate, double double chocolate, and my personal favorite, double double chocolate cinnamon caramel chip!” Celestia's eyes danced in all directions. No matter where she looked, she found herself surrounded by cookies, except for when she looked forward and saw Filly Neighs. The little unicorn looked so excited as she waited for the princess to sample the treats she worked so hard to prepare, and praise her for her talent in making them. Celestia's tummy felt heavy; it begged her not to go through with it. Be strong, my stomach; it'll soon be over. Celestia closed her eyes and opened her mouth as she leaned towards the first of many cookies she prepared herself to consume. The halls of Canterlot castle were filled with its residents bustling about in their daily activities. Various adjuncts to the departments of Defense, Treasury and National Well-Being all scurried about to deliver documents or orders to other associates working in the castle. The doors at one end of the hallway opened, and the working ponies nearest to it ceased what they were doing and moved against the wall when they noticed who was stepping through. The ponies further down mimicked the others, as princess Celestia stepped through the doors, accompanied by her two guards. Celestia groaned as she marched past her subjects, each step she took putting a strain on her belly, which was still full of more cookies than she had cared to eat. Celestia silently hoped that she would never lay eyes on another cookie again for a very long time as she cleared the hallway, allowing the other ponies to return to their duties. Celestia and her guards climbed the stairs up to the hallway leading to her bedroom. The trek upwards was more tiring than usual, due to the state her belly was in. As Celestia stood outside the door to her bedroom, she felt a bit of fatigue settling in her chest. It brought itself to the surface in the form of a yawn, and the princess had to shake her head to keep it from overtaking her. She would have loved to take a nap at the moment and regain some strength for the rest of the day. Alas, she knew it couldn't be so: even in the comfort of her bedroom, her day wasn't over until she lowered the sun. Steeling her nerves, she used her magic to open the door and stepped inside. Celestia looked about her room for what she dreaded was there. She looked to the right, and saw her brown oak dresser lined with golden edges. She looked right next to it, at the windowsill leading to her balcony overlooking the entire city. She looked ahead, towards her bed with the translucent drapes drawn around her mattress right next to her vanity mirror lined with gold. And for safe measure she looked left, to her red circle of a comforter, in front of her cozy fireplace. To her surprise, her room was exactly as she had left it this morning, before raising the sun. Celestia let relief wash over her. With a bit of a bounce in her step, she pranced over to her comforter, stepping onto the plush surface. She lowered herself onto her belly, crossing her forelegs in front of her, then letting her long elegant neck descend between her hooves. Her shoulders rose as she took a deep breath, allowing herself to relax. She rarely had the chance to catch a moment of sleep at this time of day, and she was a bit giddy with excitement. Celestia's breath softened as she felt a pleasurable sense of heaviness creep over her senses. She could hear the steady embers of her fireplace waving about, a light crackle and pop sounding out several seconds apart. Her head tilted slightly to the left as her consciousness faded more and more, so close to the blissful embrace of sleep that she craved. Her eardrums were assaulted with a quick barrage of knocks on her bedroom door. Celestia felt her heartbeat jump in her throat as she was torn from the sleep she was so close to attaining. You've got to be kidding me. Right when I was getting comfortable. She griped internally. She had to suppress a frustrated moan building in her throat. “Your highness, Royal Aide Mrs. Raven wishes to enter.” Celestia grumbled under her breath. While she had no quarrel whatsoever with Mrs. Raven, she knew what the unicorn was here for. She undoubtedly had with her the very thing Celestia was afraid to find when she first entered her bedroom only a few minutes ago. “Send her in.” She replied. With a bit of a squeak, the door handle turned and the fair brown-haired unicorn stepped through with a smile on her face. And as Celestia had feared, behind her was a stack of papers, files, and letters, culminated in a tower twice her own stature. Raven had to be extra careful that the top of the stack didn't hit Celestia's door frame as she pulled it through. “Good evening your majesty.” Raven greeted her energetically. “Sorry for being late; ended up getting a little more of a workload than I'm used to, so I had to take some extra time processing it all.” “No apology necessary.” Celestia assured her, as she watched the unicorn drop the stack of papers in front of her comforter. The tower hit the ground a touch forcefully, and the page on top shook loose. Celestia watched it waft lightly through the air, until it landed gently on her foreleg. Something caught her attention in the right side of her eye. She turned to see the levitating in the air was a tall white cup with a plastic lid on top, a bit of steam rising from the hole for sipping. “Got you some coffee to go with that, your highness.” Raven said to her softly as she kept the cup afloat. “I think you're gonna need it.” “Indeed.” Celestia replied, igniting her magic while Raven switched hers off. She took a gentle sip through the hole of the cup, and the warm drink poured over her tongue. As it traveled down her throat, her taste buds were embraced by a rich and sweet sensation. “Mm, white chocolate.” The princess smacked her tongue against the roof of her mouth as she savored the taste. “And hazelnut. You know me very well.” “I try my best, your majesty. Anything else I can do for you?” Celestia looked towards the stack of papers next to her, then back towards her aide with a smirk. “Think you could go ahead and respond to all of these for me?” The corners of Raven's mouth lifted uncomfortably as she forced herself to smile. Her eyes danced from side to side, searching for the right response. “I'm joking. That will be all Mrs. Raven, thank you.” With a quick bow, Raven turned towards the door and headed out, the guards outside closing it behind her. Now that Celestia was by herself, she closed her eyes and tilted her head to the side. The joints of her long slender neck popped loudly, and she repeated the same process for the other side before taking another slurp of coffee. “Okay...” Celestia said out loud, as she levitated a vial of ink and a quill from her dresser and hovered it toward herself. “Here we go.” And Celestia began the daunting task of pouring through each document in front of her. Most of them were of little trifle; a request for a construction permit from Horseshoe Bay, to allow the city to build an addition to the docks that handled cargo ships, in order to reduce traffic congestion. Celestia had no trouble with documents such as these; all they needed was the date of her viewing the document and for her to scribble her signature, and that was it. No trouble at all. Celestia's groaned as she saw something with Vanhoover written on the top. She internally begged that it wasn't what she thought it was before her eyes scanned the document. She shook her head when she confirmed that it was exactly what she didn't want it to be. It was a threat of secession from the city, the third one that year. The town officials had been quite noisy as of late when the citizens had gotten wind of a band in Ponyville using Poison Joke to help in their singing talents, claiming that the herb shouldn't be used for recreational purposes. They had been adamant about a nationwide ban on the herb, saying that they would secede if their demands weren't met. She knew it was an empty threat. Vanhoover was likely to crumble without Equestria's support, and she knew that they knew that fact as well. If they didn't know that, then the ponies in charge of the town probably didn't deserve to be. She had a mind to crumble the document up and toss it into her fireplace. But she knew that if she didn't give a properly documented refusal to honor their demands, it would cause even more unrest than she wanted. She levitated a blank parchment from her dresser and laid it in front of her, dipping her quill into the ink and quickly scratching it across the surface. Nearly an hour of signing and writing passed, and Celestia miraculously reached the bottom of the stack of papers. Quite exasperated, she held her temple between her hooves, a vain attempt to soothe her throbbing headache. Celestia looked towards the clock on the wall of her room, and noticed it was nearly time for lunch. While most ponies would look forward to taking a break from signing papers and having meetings in order to eat, Celestia's lunch break could hardly be considered a “break”. She would have to make a trip to the royal dining room, keeping herself poised at all times while the servants presented her meal to her. Then she would have to take the most lady-like of bites when she really wanted to stuff her face without care. And of course, she would have to skip on dessert to keep her figure, saving her sweet tooth for “special occasions”. Letting out a frustrated growl, Celestia turned over and pushed the back of her head into her seat. “Why can't they just make me a sandwich, bring it up here and leave me alone!?” Celestia shouted in anger. “I hate being a princess sometimes.” “You? Hate being a princess?” An airy male voice responded to her, making her lift her head with a start. “But I thought you were giving out wings and horns like they were hotcakes!” Celestia turned her head from left to right, seeing that nopony was immediately present. Despite being unable to see the source of the voice, she knew full well who it belonged to. Now it was just a matter of finding out where he was hiding, if he was physically present at all. She looked towards her bed, through the curtains. She looked at her dresser, up above and down below. She looked to her fireplace, still burning warm and bright. He was nowhere to be found. Celestia felt an uncomfortable itch swelling within her mane, and lifted a hoof to scratch it. Through the movements of her hoof through her wavy ethereal locks, she caught sight of it moving in front of her and noticed something wasn't quite right. Rather than shimmering waves of turquoise and heliotrope to match a misty morning sunshine, she instead saw locks of white and gray at the top, with a bit of dark brown throughout. Celestia felt unnerved at the sight, and wondered what in the world had happened to discolor her beautiful mane. Her question was answered shortly, as a pair of bright yellow eyes and a smiling mouth with a snagglefang appeared at the center of her waving mane. “Hello!” The voice called out brightly to her from her mane. “Aah!” Celestia screamed as she processed that her beautiful mane had been taken hostage by a former enemy, and present irritation. “Discord, get out of there!” The face chuckled at Celestia's commotion. “At once! It is after all as they say...” A bright white flash blinded Celestia for a second as she was forced to close her eyes. When she opened them she found the face had disappeared. Unfortunately, so had her long ethereal mane. Feeling more than shaken, Celestia touched her hoof through the air and along her cranium, confirming to her fear that she was now in fact bald. “Hair today, gone tomorrow!” His voice finished behind her. Celestia turned abruptly to see Discord in his full draconequus form, looking boastfully at his eagle claw. She realized that wrapped around one of the talons was her dislodged mane in its proper color and beauty. “Give that back.” Celestia ordered him, with an involuntary twitch of her right eye as she struggled to keep her temper in check. “Oh don't get your tail in a bunch, missy.” Discord said, waving his mane wrapped talon at her. “It's not really my color.” He extended his arm towards her and poked the side of her head, twirling his talon in circles and unraveling the mane as if it were a bit of yarn wrapped around him. In a matter of seconds, the tip of her mane had left his claw, and it had been restored fully to its proper place. In the past, Discord's presence had filled Celestia with dread, fury, and a touch of fear. The draconequus had once been a tyrant of chaos and disharmony, causing misery for all ponies in Equestria. But through a series of events, the magic of friendship had prevailed, and Discord had resigned his wicked ways in exchange for a more peaceful life in the nation. Despite his reformed nature, he still had a tendency to turn things on its head wherever he went, though it was never for more than a few minutes. The dread Celestia had once felt toward Discord had as of late been replaced with a mild annoyance at most, even though he rarely paid visits to her. “What do you want, Discord?” Celestia asked, after taking a breath to calm her building nerves. Discord feigned shivering, holding his arms together and chattering his teeth. “Well, for a pony in charge of the sun, that's a rather cold greeting.” He replied. “Why is it that everypony I speak to thinks I 'want' something from them?” “Well then, why are you here?” Celestia's impatience was beginning to show, as her volume increased the slightest bit. “Ah, now that's a rather interesting story.” Discord stepped towards the fireplace, rubbing his palms together before warming them over the flame. “You see, Fluttershy's taken her darling Angel bunny to the park on that pet play date thing that they do every so often. I wanted to go with her, but wouldn't you know it, I don't have a pet, so I was left at her cottage!” Discord turned to her, his furry lion paw lifted up against his forehead as his face wore a look of sorrow. “All alone, nothing to do, absolutely bored to tears!” His eyes welled up with moisture, and a red hanky materialized before his face, which he used to blow his nose rather loudly. “I'm very sorry to hear that, Discord.” Celestia rolled her eyes at his exaggerated lamentations. “It must be very agonizing for somepony as hyperactive as you to be left with nothing to keep occupied.” “You're telling me.” Discord said with a bit of a sniffle. On a turn of a coin, he smiled as if he hadn't even been crying, and the handkerchief began to float in the air. “But then something peculiar happened. While I was loafing around her cottage, I could feel the most exquisite surge of disharmony building in the distance.” Wiggling the phalanges of his paw and claw, the floating red cloth began to twirl and extend in length through the air. “I wasn't exactly sure where it was coming from, so I had to follow the trail myself, wherever it took me” As the cloth kept extending, Discord stepped off of his legs and towards the end of the handkerchief. As if squeezed through a funnel, his head became long and thin, as did the rest of his body, and his form slithered across the spirals through the air. “I followed it all the way out of the little town of Ponyville, up the spires of Canterlot until I found myself here in the castle.” He continued, the end of the handkerchief reaching the tip of Celestia's horn. “And lo and behold, guess where I found myself?” Discord asked, appearing from the end of the disappearing cloth. His body had shrunk to the size of a doll. With his legs wrapped around her horn, he graciously twirled himself around it all the way down, until he was laying with his chest against Celestia's temple. “M-me?” Celestia asked rather perplexed. “You felt disharmony coming from me... all the way out in Ponyville?” “Like you wouldn't believe!” Discord clamored excitedly. “I don't know what you're doing, but you're just brimming with inner conflict and confusion. ” Discord slipped down the bridge of Celestia's muzzle, yawning a bit before finding residence under Celestia's left eye. “Why if I were up to my old ways, something like this would be quite nurturing. I could probably break out of ten stone imprisonments, and still have enough energy to turn the whole nation into an omelet!” He said, lifting the bags under Celestia's eye over himself as a makeshift blanket. While Discord himself seemed to be enjoying the playful jabs at her, Celestia was finding no humor in it whatsoever. She shook her head violently in an effort to be rid of the little troublemaker. With her mane sprawled out in a frenzy, she looked down and noticed that Discord had vanished from her eyelid. “Hey, come on now, what's the matter?” Discord asked from above, now back to his proper size. With a brush in his paw, he passed through the mess of her sparkling mane and restored it to its proper elegant form. “You don't want to talk about it?” Celestia looked up towards him with a disapproving glare. “You? Of all ponies, why would you want to hear me gripe about my day?” “Because, hanging out with Fluttershy and her friends has ruined me!” Discord complained, the majority of his weight falling over Celestia and blocking her sight with his brown chest. He continued to slither down past her and across the floor. “All of them gabbing on and on about their feelings, and emotions and all that junk. I tried to block it out for the longest time, but it's finally poisoned me, and made me... sentimental.” Discord winced and appeared as if he were choking at the utterance of the word. Blinking out of sight for a moment, he appeared to Celestia's left, donned in a brown blazer and half-framed glasses over his eyes. A pen and notebook appeared in his grasp, and he looked towards her with a reassuring smile. “So, I'm willing to give you somepony to vent to, your majesty. I want you to tell me everything that's causing this upheaval of disharmony within you. I'm all ears, so don't hold back!” Celestia watched him sit back on thin air, as if a chair were holding his weight. She wanted to believe that his offer was genuine, that there would be no ill repercussions to come from his presence in her bedroom. Past memories were hard to let go of, however, even if they had taken place centuries ago. “I'm not sure if I buy it Discord,” Celestia said, and Discord dragged his paw across his face in exasperation. “How do I know that venting all of my 'disharmony' to you isn't going to give you a surge in power that’ll make you unstoppable from going on another rampage through Equestria?” “Cut me some slack, will you? I learned my lesson after the whole Tirek thing; no more evil from me, okay?” Celestia's face remained stone cold to him. Discord rolled his eyes, before placing his paw over his chest and his claw in the air. “I swear on Fluttershy's friendship that I will do you, nor Equestria, any harm.” That was something Celestia took comfort in. For a reason she and the others couldn't quite explain, the timid little pegasus on the edge of the Everfree Forest had influenced the spirit of chaos in a way that defied all expectation. Even when Discord proved that he had outsmarted the elements, the knowledge that he had upset his first (and at the time, only) friend had crushed him. Celestia and the others knew that Fluttershy was very dear to him, and that he would go to untold lengths to keep their bond intact. If he was putting their friendship on the line for her trust, then Celestia could find a degree of comfort in trusting him. “Fair enough.” She resigned. Discord’s face brightened with joy, and he once again took up his pen, at the ready to write. “Where to begin...” And with her head leaning on the side of her couch, she told Discord what was on her mind. She spoke and spoke, and spoke some more. Her head whipped around as she felt her anger rise at the thought of different issues that plagued her throughout her day. She lifted her right hoof to mimic the ponies who tried her patience, and blew a raspberry to illustrate her disgust with them. The two shared an unvoiced but nonetheless mutual surprise for what was taking place at the moment; Princess Celestia, normally so calm and reserved, was finally being given a chance to unfilter her grievances, and from the sound of things, she had been holding quite a bit back for some time. “Wow, princess, that's... wow.” Discord uttered, at a loss for how to properly respond to what he had heard. “And you know what really gets my goat about all this?” Celestia went on, Discord shaking his head innocently. “Is that I just don't ever get to have fun anymore. I don't! I can have some 'leisure time' as long as I schedule it in advance. But I never get to cut loose when I want to. It's always schedules, deadlines and appointments, no time for wigging out and having fun, you know?” “Well, I don't actually know, your highness. But I can imagine how stressful that must be. They make you run around like a dog!” “Tch.” Celestia scoffed. “Even dogs have it better than me, Discord...” As she uttered her frustration, she found her mind locked on what she had just said. Something about it captured her attention. “I suppose you're right, Sunny. But here's the thing:” As Discord spoke, Celestia rolled off of her recliner and trotted towards the window of her balcony. “Princess?” Discord looked towards her with confusion. Celestia's eyes looked through the glass window, out towards Canterlot. She couldn't see it herself, but she knew off in the distance there was Ponyville, and further still, Sweet Apple Acres. She pictured the Apple family busying themselves on their farm, their dog Winona prancing about as happy as could be. A smile crept onto her face at the thought of Applejack’s four-legged friend. “Discord... I just had a strange thought.” she said hesitantly. With a flash of white, Discord teleported across the room. His notebook, pen, blazer and glasses had disappeared when he rematerialized right next to her. “I'm listening.” He replied. “Just a few days ago, my sister and I went to Sweet Apple Acres so we could purchase some of their cider. While I was there, I saw Applejack's dog Winona, romping across the grass while she was chasing away fruit bats. She was so happy running around, receiving pets or praises, enjoying what little scraps of food she received. She was just the cutest, happiest little thing I've seen in such a long time” Discord nodded as he listened to Equestria's oldest princess digress the machinations of her psyche. “And now, looking back on it, I realize I'm envious of her. I wish I could live that way; running around outside, without any schedules or deadlines to meet, being immensely happy at the little things I was given; just enjoying life to the fullest no matter what was happening at the time.” Celestia rose a hoof and laid it against the glass of the window. “I feel as if that little lady has it all figured out.” Discord looked towards the ceiling and tapped his paw against his chin. “You know, funny story,” He began, clearing his throat before he continued. “First time I broke out of that lovely stone prison of mine, and ran amok in Ponyville, I had a little fun on Sweet Apple Acres before Twilight and the others sealed me up again.” “You don't say?” Celestia replied, just a hint of annoyance building in her voice. “I do say! And part of that fun was when I warped the mind of Applejack's brother- oh, what's his name? Mack-something? Oh right- Big Macintosh.” Discord's recounting was interrupted by his own laughter as the image played out in his mind. “I made the stallion think he was a dog!” That greatly captured Celestia's attention. “You did?” “I did! Oh, it was hysterical! He was barking, and digging holes, and licking AJ and her granny's faces! Oh ho ho ho, that was a sight to behold. Kind of cute in a weird way.” Celestia had never heard of Discord doing such a thing before. She had seen Applejack's brother that morning, big and stalwart, brimming with a farmer's pride; a stallion among stallions, though humble and gentlecoltly. The thought of the big red stallion running around the farmlands barking and chewing on toys made her giggle. But her laughter subsided when she thought of herself behaving in the same way, and she was overwhelmed with curiosity. “Discord... another strange thought.” She said, keeping her eyes from him. “Could you do such a thing again?” “Of course I could do it again; it would be a cinch-! Wait, hold on” Discord asked, his neck extending several feet in the air, and then curling out to properly face Celestia. “What exactly are you asking of me?” His yellow eyes locked with her own for a moment, but she turned away while biting the tip of her hoof. She thought of saying the words, but her nerves made made them impossible to dislodge from her throat. “Are you asking me to brainwash you into thinking you're a dog?” Celestia felt her ears burn softly. It was quite embarrassing to hear him say it out loud. She suddenly became aware of what an odd request it was, but she could not deny it. The stress of her day had proven that she did in fact envy Applejack's faithful companion. Even if it was through some manipulation, she wanted to experience it for herself, just for a moment. She knew she was out of sorts, but she needed to experience it so terribly, even if it was just once to get it out of her system. “Yes, that's what I'm asking.” she admitted, sounding a touch defeated. “Huh. Well, that's a new one. Okay, so, let's get this straight: I hypnotize you, and poof, you think you're a dog. Then what?” “Then I get to be free! I don't have to worry about being a princess for a while. I can just run around, and play, and just enjoy being alive without care!” “Right, sure, but when I did it to Big Macintosh, he still looked like himself. So what's going to happen when everypony sees you, the princess of Equestria running around sniffing trees and fire hydrants?” “That, uh... oh, appearance concealment!” Celestia exclaimed. “That's easy magic, especially for you! You could make everypony who sees me think I actually do look like a dog.” “Alright, fair enough. But if you have the mind of something like that, how are you going to make sure you don't hurt yourself or get into trouble?” Celestia winced as she thought quickly, her mind racing with possibilities. She smiled when one idea in particular jumped out to her. “You!” “Me?” “Yes, you could be my owner!” “... This is getting weird.” Discord said awkwardly, looking away from Celestia. “I know it's a lot to ask, but could you look after me for just one day, to make sure nothing gets out of hoof?” “A day!? You expect me to look after you for a full day!?” “Pleeeeease?” Celestia asked, sitting on her rump with her hooves up to her chin, and stuck her bottom lip out while her eyes sparkled with need. “H-how- who taught you to do that!?” Discord growled exasperatingly. It was visibly apparent that he was having trouble shunning the charm of Celestia’s piteous expression. He put the palm of his claw over his paw and shook his head.“Wait wait wait, time out- so, not even twenty minutes ago, I had to beg you to tell me how your day was. Now suddenly, you think it's a good idea for me to brainwash you?” Celestia looked away from him a moment, touching her hooves together as she contemplated things. It was true, there was still a bit of hesitance lingering in her heart from his past misdeeds. But she remembered the heartbreak she witnessed after he had been deceived by Tirek. He had been remorseful of his mistake when he learned that his selfishness had cost him his friendship and left him with nothing. And she could see that he was moved by Twilight's compassion when she asked for Tirek to spare him, even when she had no reason to. Looking at the yellow eyes of the draconequus looking down at her, she couldn't sense any malice or ill intent within him. All she could see was genuine concern for her, though she had once been his enemy. The spirit of chaos had finally found some room in his heart to care for she who worked to preserve harmony. To say that she was touched would have been quite the understatement. “I trust you, Discord.” Celestia admitted sincerely. “Fluttershy and the others have trusted you for a while now; it's time that I do the same.” Discord's eyes relaxed, and he returned the look of sentiment that she gave him. He quickly shook his head to keep his thoughts from drifting, and then slithered closer to her. “Alright, let's get this over with then.” Discord cracked his knuckles, then rolled his neck around a few times. He rose and lowered his shoulders to limber up, before lifting them up and taking Celestia's face gently into his grasp. With her chin craned upwards to him, Celestia felt her nerves creep up expectantly. “Ssh, just relax, princess.” Discord said to her, in a tone much softer than she thought he was capable of. “Try not to worry about it; it'll make things easier.” As she stared up at him, she noticed his yellow eyes had red rings swirling from the edge, spinning towards the center and into his crimson pupils. She found the movement enchanting; was it just one spiral, moving around and around? Or were there many being constructed and deconstructed one after another? Where did it begin, and where did it end? Were there even such things as beginnings and ends? Did they matter? As Celestia's thoughts wandered, she felt a sense of lightness overcome her brain. It felt as if it was melting away, dissolving, emptying out of her ears. She forgot what it meant to feel worry, fear, or anything for that matter. Celestia's vision of Discord became blurred by pools of red and green, and soon enough, it was all she could see. The colors washed over her body, wrapped around her soothingly. She lost herself in them as they coaxed her. They made her feel safe, and secure, shielded from the world. “There we go,” She heard a voice echo within the puddle that her mind had been reduced to. “You’re doing just fine, princess.” She wondered where that voice came from. Was it somepony else, or her own thoughts speaking to her? She immediately decided it wasn't worth thinking about. She felt tired; so wonderfully tired. With no desire to fight it, she let the sensation overcome her, and drifted off into sleep, wrapped in the cocoon of red and green. And without even realizing it, her consciousness was gone; faded into the far, unperceivable depths of her mind.