//------------------------------// // A Brief Interlude in the Midst of a Crusade // Story: Sensational Serials: Silly, Short Stories for Silly, Short Ponies // by PhycoKrusk //------------------------------// Quietly and discreetly, the changeling poked his head just past the doors to the saloon, taking a quick look around at the collection of ponies and one griffon. All in all, it seemed safe enough to ask for directions. “Big words from a filthy mud pony like yourself,” said the griffon, and just like that the illusion of safety vanished. He almost wondered why nonponies all have to be so rude and violent, before he thought of a particular prissy purple pony princess who actually got into a slugging match with the boss and even managed to get some good hits in. Maybe it was the ponies who were all rude and violent? Not sparing time to ponder the issue, the changeling quietly and discreetly backed away from the entrance and then circled around to the back of the saloon to rejoin a group of twenty three other changelings — including one that towereed at least a full head above all the others — and one alicorn princess. “Well?” asked Princess Twilight Sparkle. “My father used to say there was always a right time and place to ask for help,” the changeling replied. He was answered with silence. “And?” asked the enormous Commander Wrecker after a few moments. “This is neither of them.” A collection of groans and one complaint of, “Seriously?” rose from the crowd: More walking. “I guess we’ll just go back to following the railroad,” Twilight said. “Don’t be down, Purple Menace,” Wrecker said, earning a glare from Twilight. “We only need to get as far as Cowbuquerque. I have a good feeling about that town.” Three days later, Princess Twilight Sparkle issued a royal decree forbidding Wrecker from ever navigating anywhere again, and event which quickly devolved into another slugging match. One thing led to another, and during an interview shortly after the birth of the world’s second pony-changeling hybrid, Twilight advised young fillies everywhere to “Lead with your left, and keep hammering him until he kisses you.” She received thousands of complaints following the interview due to her apparent endorsement of violence. She received thousands more “Thank you” cards because her advice actually worked, and worked so well that Princess Celestia took up boxing. Then, she began to tape photographs of the Griffon Emperor on all her heavy and speed bags. The Emperor responded by taking up boxing himself and tape contraband photographs of Celestia’s posterior on all of his heavy and speed bags. Needless to say, things got weird.