//------------------------------// // The 2nd Plague: Cats // Story: Pharaoh Moans // by MythrilMoth //------------------------------// "I hereby call this emergency meeting of the Council of Friendship to order," Twilight said. As time was a factor, Twilight had hurriedly sent a message to Celestia, told Spike to watch the castle and report anything amiss, then appropriated Town Hall for use as an impromptu gathering place for her friends, who all stood around, confused and concerned. "The...Council of Friendship?" Rainbow asked. "Seriously? We're going with that now?" "First Ah heard of it," Applejack said. "I like it!" Pinkie Pie said with a grin. "Girls, focus," Twilight said. She gestured to the two unicorns standing beside her. "This is Rosetta Stone, and this is Dr. Amber Glow. They're with the EEHS, and the foremost experts on ancient Anugypt available." The girls blinked at the two unicorns. "Uhh...which one's which?" Rainbow asked. "I mean, those are both mares' names, but..." Rosetta Stone dipped his head, his ears wilting. "Rainbow Dash!" Rarity snapped. "Honestly!" She smiled placatingly at Rosetta Stone. "Do ignore her, Dr. Glow—" Amber Glow coughed. "I am Dr. Glow," she said. "Zis dummkopf is Rosetta Stone." "Oh. I do apologize." "ANYWAY," Twilight said loudly, stepping forward and flaring her wings, "we have a crisis on our hooves." "Tell me about it," Applejack said. "Ah can't water apple trees with milk!" "Too much milk is bad for my animals," Fluttershy said. "And some of them are lactose intolerant!" "Yes, the milk is a bad thing, but it's not the real crisis," Twilight said. "At least, if what the EEHS ponies say is happening is true." "I kinda hope it is," Rainbow said, fluttering her wings excitedly. "Because fighting mummies sounds awesome!" "M-mummies?!" Fluttershy gasped, shrinking back. "Oh...oh my..." "Excuse me darling," Rarity said. "Did you say...mummies? As in...as in the Anugyptian mummies from the exhibit?" "Yes," Twilight said. "Apparently, some sort of ancient curse has brought the mummified sphinxes to life, and they're...well...missing." "Curses an' mummies?" Applejack asked, scratching her head. "Ain't that jes' th' kinda thing you always say is silly nonsense?" "Ordinarily, yes," Twilight said. "But we're dealing with sphinxes here, and to be honest, we don't really know what they're capable of." She frowned and began to pace. "According to these esteemed ponies, there are nine plagues which accompany this curse. The first plague is water turning into milk." She glanced at Amber Glow for confirmation. Amber Glow nodded. "Ja. As Queen Neferkitti regenerates her nine lives, ze nine plagues vill fall upon ze land. Her dark power vill grow, und Equestria vill be plunged into chaos." "So whadda we do to stop it?" Rainbow asked. Amber Glow shook her head. "Ich weiss nicht," she said. "According to legend, Queen Neferkitti vas sealed avay because ze ancients feared she vould become as great a threat to ponykind as ze jackal king. Ze pony slaves took Lionaptra in ze dead of night und killed ze Queen eight times, zen mummified und buried her alive in her ninth life." "Why didn't they just kill her nine times?" Pinkie asked. "I mean, wouldn't that have made more sense?" "It's all very complicated," Rosetta Stone said, adjusting his glasses. "It has to do with religion and superstition and the afterlife and...well, it's all very complicated." "In any case," Amber Glow continued, "Queen Neferkitti vas entombed beneath Lionaptra mit her daughter und her two faithful retainers, also mummified in their ninth lives." She started to pace. "Mit ze invocation of ze curse, zese ancient mummies now roam free, und ze nine plagues vill herald ze Sphinx Queen's return." "So...what do we do?" Rainbow repeated slowly. Twilight sighed. "For now, the six of us need to try to find and contain the sphinxes while Rosetta Stone and Dr. Glow research a way to put a stop to this." She turned to the two unicorns. "My library is at your disposal. It probably won't have much that'll be of use with this, but until Princess Celestia gets our message and contacts your colleagues, it's the best we've got." "We'll do our best, Your Highness," Rosetta Stone said. "Thank you," Twilight said. "Okay, girls, let's move out!" "Yeah!" Pinkie cheered, jumping up in the air. "We'll round up this pissy pussy posse in no time!" The doors to Town Hall opened in Twilight's magical aura, and the six friends strode boldly and confidently out into the streets of Ponyville... ...right into a massive swarm of angry, hissing cats. "...right after we round up this pissy pussy posse," Pinkie Pie said, her ears drooping. "The second plague," Rosetta Stone said gravely. "The plague of cats." "Komm, dummkopf," Amber Glow said brusquely. "Ve haff vork to do." * * * * * Ponyville was overrun with hundreds of cats of all shapes and sizes, stampeding through the streets, yowling, hissing, spitting, and scratching. Everywhere one looked, ponies could be seen running in panic. "The horror! THE HORROR!" Lily Valley screamed before fainting right into the furry frenzy. Lyra Heartstrings stood on the tips of all four hooves on the back of the bench she and Bon Bon had been sitting on moments earlier. "Where did all these cats come from?" Bon Bon frowned. "This is a real catastrophe," she said. "I had a feeling a cataclysm was just over the horizon." She sighed. "I guess this is just how it is...even though the bugbear's been catapulted back to Tartarus, I still can't catch a break..." Lyra's right eye twitched. "I wonder what the catalyst is—MMPH!" Lyra seized a random cat with her magic and rubbed it in Bon Bon's face. "Just...no," Lyra said. * * * * * "AH-CHOO!" Cranky Doodle Donkey's toupee flew across the room from the force of his sneeze, landing on one of the many cats that had gotten into the cottage. The cat yowled and started clawing the nearest thing—which happened to be Matilda. "GAH!" Matilda screamed. "Cranky, do something!" "I ca-cuh-CHOO! Can't!" Cranky said. "I'm alluh-huh-herCHOO!" "SCAT, cats!" Matilda shouted, bucking cats left and right as Cranky sneezed his head off. * * * * * "My cello!" Octavia cried, curling up into a ball and whimpering as several cats used her beloved cello as a scratching post. Vinyl Scratch frowned and cranked up her bass cannon, then dropped a beat that literally blew the cats that had invaded their house straight out the front door. * * * * * "GREAT WHICKERING STALLIONS! GET OFF OF THAT THIS INSTANT! IT ISN'T—" *ZAP* "HREEEEOWL!" "—safe..." * * * * * "H-hey! I was saving that milk for muffin time! AH! No, don't eat those! W-wait...I think I have a fish muffin here somewhere..." "Why would you have a fish muffin...?" "The Muffin of the Month Club sends me some very strange things sometimes..." * * * * * "N-no, please, don't go that way...oh, why won't you listen to me?" Fluttershy flew this way and that down a street full of yowling cats and panicking ponies. She tried desperately to get the cats to listen to her, but they were going completely berserk. She'd managed to get a few of them in line and behaving, but compared to the absolute chaos the rest of the cats were causing, it was like taking a little tiny baby sip of a lake. "Fluttershy, can't you use your Stare on these cats?" Twilight asked from beside her. "On this many cats all at once?" Fluttershy asked. "Twilight, my Stare can only do so much! Besides, that only works on critters that are doing what comes naturally to them. This isn't normal!" "HELP!" a group of fillies screamed. Fluttershy and Twilight watched as a swelling wave of cats crashed down the street, carrying the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Silver Spoon, and Diamond Tiara on their backs. "Oh my goodness," Fluttershy whispered. She swooped down; Twilight followed behind her. Working together, they rescued the five fillies and deposited them on a nearby rooftop. "Stay up here, girls," Twilight said. "Just until we get this mess straightened out." "Whut's goin' on, Twilight?" Apple Bloom asked, visibly freaked out. "Whut's with all these crazy cats?" "Yeah, this is a real CAT-astrophe!" Scootaloo said. Silver Spoon punched her in the side. "It's, well...a mummy's curse," Twilight said. "Come on, Fluttershy! We've got work to do!" "R-right..." As the two mares swept off again, the fillies looked at each other excitedly. "Did you hear that?" Scootaloo asked, her wings buzzing. "A mummy's curse!" "Ah thought curses weren't real," Apple Bloom said with a frown. "Yeah, but that's like, zebra curses," Sweetie Belle said. "If Twilight says there's a mummy's curse, then there's definitely a mummy's curse." She looked at her two best friends. "And you know what that means." The Crusaders' faces slowly lit up with maniacal grins. "CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS CURSE BREAKERS!" "SERIOUSLY?!" Silver Spoon shouted. "You already HAVE your Cutie Marks! You're STILL gonna go off and do something completely hare-brained that'll probably end in epic fail?!" Apple Bloom shrugged. "Well...yeah," she said. "It's kinda whut we do." Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara looked at each other and shrugged. "We're in," they said together. * * * * * "Git...down...outta...them...trees!" Big Macintosh huffed as he swatted ineffectually at cats with a rake. With a frustrated growl, he dropped the rake, turned, and bucked the tree. Cats and apples fell like rain. A lithe form glided down from the sky, landing in front of him. It wasn't a pony, or any other creature he'd ever seen—and yet he'd read enough in his spare time to recognize her as a sphinx. Her mane was mostly grey, but some of it was glossy, shiny black. Almost half of her body had old, nasty bandages wrapped haphazardly around it, some hanging off and trailing behind her like toilet paper. Her hide was a mix of bold golden pelt and withered, dried grey hairless skin. Instead of hooves, she had a lion's paws; a thin, whiplike cat tail lashed behind her. Bright blue eyes stared at him from a face that was mostly dessicated; only the end of her muzzle and some of the flesh around her ears showed any vitality. She wore an ornate gold headdress and a necklace dripping with jewels. She smiled at him, licking her lips. "You are fine and strong," she said. "You would serve me well. Become my slave, and your rewards—" She passed her paw over an apple that lay on the ground. It turned to solid gold. "—will be great." Big Mac frowned. "Nnnnope," he rumbled. The sphinx scowled. Another, slightly smaller sphinx stepped into view. The wind stirred at his sides, and Big Mac turned his head this way and that to see two mummies flanking him. The sphinx standing before him raised one paw, baring curved, sharp claws. "Let me put it another way," she said. "Become my slave, or your entire farm becomes my scratching post...AND my litterbox." Big Mac stomped a hoof. "Try it." The sphinx smiled...and lashed out at the nearest tree. Big Mac watched in horror as her claws tore straight through the trunk, leaving deep gashes. The tree listed perilously to the right. "Willoughby!" Big Mac cried in anguish. "You monster!" The sphinx licked her claws, fixing her eyes imperiously on him. Big Mac sighed, his ears wilting. "Do Ah still git th' gold?" The sphinx laughed. "If you serve me well." She flicked her tail across his nose as she walked past him. "Come, slave." "Eeyup..."