//------------------------------// // For the GREAT and POWERFUL TRIXIE! // Story: Ugh, What Happened Last Night? // by JamesBurton //------------------------------// Ladies and Gentlemen put your hooves together for the mare of magic, the show stopper, the one who's skills know no equal, the one and only, The Great and Powerful Trixie! Trixie appears on stage in a puff of smoke. "Greetings Trixie's loyal followers! It certainly been quite some time since Trixie has seen your wonderful faces." she takes a bow for the crowd which was roaring with applause. "Thank you, thank you you're far to kind for little ol Trixie." She blows a kiss out to her audience. "Before we get started, Trixie would like you to meet Trixie's dearest companions she met while in Ponyville. "Give a warm welcome to those high flying schoolteachers, Lightning Dust and Blazer!" Lightning Dust and her assistant Blazer walked on stage waving to the crowd who received them warmly. They stood next to Trixie as she introduced her next companion. "Next, she is the mare of the oceans, studying the life within, give it up for the marine biologist, Sea Swirl!" Sea Swirl quickly entered the stage and hid behind Trixie poking her head out looking at the crowd. "Looks like somepony has a case of stage fright." Trixie told the crowd. "But not to worry, these final two are no strangers to large crowds. "Lyra and Bon Bon! Come on down!" Lyra and Bon Bon enter the stage standing on the other side of Trixie. "Hey! How come we don't get cool titles?" Lyra asked. "Because everybody knows what you two do." Trixie responded. "Bon Bon is a candy maker while you play the lyre to fund for your 'Human Research'." Lyra hangs her head down in shame muttering damn it over and over again. "Now then, Trixie knows how much you all have been pining for Trixie and Trixie understands, so in order to bring you more Great and Powerful Trixie, Trixie has decided to kidnap the author, locking him in the basement forcing him read Motherly Scootaloo from the very beginning till he gets his act together." "NOOO GOD! NO GOD PLEASE NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Somewhere beneath Twilight and Trixie's basement. Some poor bastard was tied up in a chair with blood coming out of his eyes. "THIS IS PURE TORTURE! OH MY GOD! HELL HAS GOT TO BE MORE PLEASENT THAN THIS!" "I don't know Rumble, I just don't want to date anybody right now." "Bitch you cant hear? I said you was going on a date with me." "Scoots, quit being a pussy and date him." "Well if you don't Ah'm gonna." Scootaloo gives Apple Bloom a nasty glare. "Bitch that's what ah thought." "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" "Harsh." Lightning said. "Now then, a recap of what happened since our last chapter." Trixie takes off her cape holding it in the air. "Ta-dah!" Trixie flings her cape and a projector appeared as the crowd begins to applaud her trick. "Thank you, thank you Trixie loves you all!" taking off her hat in reaching inside looking for something. "Now where is- Ah-Ha!" she pulled out Spike and set him on the floor. "What the?!" Spike said looking around. "How did I end up here?!" "Spike, could you do Trixie a favor and operate the projector while Trixie does her recap?" Trixie asked putting on her hat. Spike looks up at the show mare with a look of surprise. "Trixie?! But...How?" "Magic, Spike." Trixie said with a wink. "Magic." Not willing to question it any further, Spike walks over the projector still trying to figure out how did Trixie managed to pull him from Ponyville. "Lights!" Lightning Dust flies up to the catwalk turning dimming down the light as Trixie began to speak about the first slide. "Now, you remember that Trixie married Twilight Sparkle right? Slide!" Spike grumbles pushing the button to change it to the next slide. "Well after Twilight cruelly left Trixie to discover what happened last night. Trixie had to go out and...Mingle with the townsponies. Slide!" Spike pushes the button changing the slide to Twilight and Trixie doing something suggestive. "Wah! Spike change it! Change it now!" Spike quickly pushes the button to change the slide to something more appropriate. "Ahem, Now while Trixie was out she met her new companions to form the new mane six. Slide!" "Er, that was the last slide Trixie." Spike informed. "Oh, well moving on!" she takes off her hat reaching down and pulls out a book. "But if you truly wish to know how Trixie puts up with Twilight you can buy my new tell all book called...Uh...Twilight." Trixie glances at the book displeased. "Probably should've came up with a better name. But! in Trixie's book you will find all the things Twilight does that annoy Trixie to no end. Only $9.99 at your local book store." "Oh, so is that how it is Trixie?" Trixie's face turned ghost white as her husband Twilight Sparkle entered the stage with her friends looking quite amused. "Aww damn." Lyra muttered. "Twilight!" Trixie quickly hides the book back in her hat. "Uh, Trixie is very happy to see you here! And totally not shocked to see you here! Not at all!" Twilight smiled as she walked up to Trixie. "So, I heard you wrote a book about me?" "Book? Trixie knows not of what you speak." Trixie said giggling nervously as she looks back to her friends for assistance. "Friends, do you know of this book that Twilight speaks of?" "You mean the one that you put in your hat?" Sea Swirl asked innocently. Trixie stared blankly at Sea Swirl. "The next time Trixie asks a rhetorical question just smile ok?" "Ok." Sea Swirl replied smiling. Twilight circles around Trixie like a shark that found it's next meal. "No I insist, what kind of spouse would I be if I didn't read your hard work." using her magic Twilight makes the book appear before her. "Now let's see here. Trixie gasps trying to retrieve her book from Twilight's possession. "No! Trixie demands that you do not read that book!" "What's wrong baby?" Twilight mocked opening the book. "Are you afraid that they'll find out how you turn to putty if I nibble your ears?" Lightning Dust and Blazer covered their mouths trying to contain their laughter at Trixie's expense. "W-What?!" Trixie balked. "Trixie is the dominant one in this marriage!" "Oh really? Then why am I always on top during the love making?" Twilight smirked. "Oh my." Bon Bon's face turned red while Lyra was on the floor rolling with laughter crying her eyes out. Trixie entire coat went from blue to red eyes franticly looking around for a comeback. "Uh...Uh..." "Or when I whisper sweet nothings in your ear making your legs shake?" "Welp, that's all the time we have for today!" Trixie shouted. "We'll see you in the next chapter of Ugh, What Happened Last Night where The Great and Powerful Trixie finally takes her role as the star!" "Speaking of stars, remember when you said that-" "SHUT UP TWILIGHT!"