The Titan's Orb

by Old Man Dusters


Chapter Twenty One - There and Back Again


I put a hand on Twilight’s upper chest and forced her up against the tree beside us.

“I know what you did you bitch!” I growled viscously.

Callum! What the hay’s wrong with you!?” Applejack exclaimed as she ran towards me.

“I didn’t do anything!” Twilight yelped in fear.

Liar!” I boomed.

It was then when Applejack stood between me and Twilight and pushed my arm away, releasing Twilight.

“What in tarnation is going on here!?” She demanded.

He attacked me for no reason!” Twilight whimpered.

“She made the clone feel pain, and I want that filthy little mouth to admit it!” I spat, pointing a finger at Twilight.

“I did no such thing!” She shouted back.

Besides Applejack, the rest of the group stood around us and simply watched, unsure of who to believe.

“You call me a monster, when you created a clone with feelings!” I growled.

“That’s not true!”

I stood back and looked to the others.

“Did you not hear his screams?” I asked openly.

“Yeah, we did.” Rainbow Dash agreed, now glaring at Twilight.

“Care to explain?” Applejack the purple unicorn.

“It was a trick to attract more crocodiles.” She told us, nervous.

You LIAR! I know myself Twilight! I heard the terror in his voice! Those screams were REAL!”I roared.

“Stop trying to turn my friends against me Callum! It won’t work!” She spat.

“This isn’t between me and your friends Twilight, this is between me and you!” I growled back.

Twilight’s horn began to glow, and she gritted her teeth.

“I’m not afraid of you human…”

“You think my species makes me evil? Hm? Is that your problem!? My species!?” I yelled.

“Well done! The penny drops, you stupid creature!”

“Why don’t you say that to my face, not from behind your friend!” I retorted.

“Is that a threat?”

“Come here and find out!” I growled.

Twilight’s horn glowed brighter.

“Get out of my way Applejack.” She said.

“Guys, calm down…” Applejack pleaded in response.

“It’s time to teach this animal a lesson…” Twilight snarled.

“He’s not an animal…” Fluttershy tried to put in.

Shut up!” Twilight barked.

Fluttershy’s eyes filled with tears in mere seconds.

“Some friend you are!” I taunted.

“Applejack, move, now.”

“Sugarcube, we don’t need to be like this.”

Move Applejack!

Applejack sighed and walked back.

“Twilight, for goodness sake, please don’t kill the boy.” Rarity said, rolling her eyes.

“You think this is a joke!?” Twilight spat.

“No, I just think this hostility is pathetic. One of you two is lying, so whoever it is needs to grow up and admit the truth.” Rarity told us both.

“You think this animal has the mental ability to grow up?”

As Twilight insulted me to Rarity, I crept up on her without her knowing; I said nothing and simply waited for her to turn around.



Eventually she did turn and quickly jumped in shock, before she growled and started to charge up her horn.
Before she could cast her spell on me, I lunged forward and grabbed her horn tightly before squeezing it, hard. This caused her to scream in pain and dispel her magic, likewise, I growled in pain as her horn was boiling hot. I let go of her horn and simply pushed her shoulder with my other hand, she fell down like a sack of potatoes before putting her hooves over her head to clutch her horn, which was evidently in a LOT of pain now.

“Dude… What did you just do?” Dash breathed.

I knelt beside Twilight and grabbed her wrist.

“Tell them the truth.”

She ignored me and continued to writhe in pain.

Tell them the truth!” I boomed.

ALRIGHT! I MADE HIM FEEL PAIN! I LIED ABOUT! I MADE HIM SUFFER ON PURPOSE!” She screamed at the top of her lungs, wailing like a banshee, tears streaming down her face.

I let go of her wrist and left her to get over the pain.

“And she says I’m the monster…” I grunted in frustration, walking back towards the lake and the dead crocodile.



I picked up the orb shard on the way, if the group wanted to progress in the mission, they would need to force Twilight to make amends with me. I wanted an apology, and damn sincere one.
I sat down on the belly of the dead croc and looked at my hand, my whole right palm had been slightly burned by Twilight’s horn; the whole inner hand was red and throbbed painfully.

“What made you what you are…?” I mumbled in regards to Twilight.

I didn’t want this; I didn’t want this at all… Ironically, Twilight was once my favourite pony, but now, she was nothing to me but a monster…
I had to get to the bottom of this…

{“You think my species makes me evil? Hm? Is that your problem!? My species!?”
“Well done! The penny drops, you stupid creature!”}

Those words whizzed around in my head. She hated what I was. Not just who
Princess Celestia was definitely at the bottom of this, and whatever she’d done, it was in regards to the human race as a whole, not just me personally.

“Hey.” A southern accented voice said behind me.

“Here to have a go at me Applejack?” I sighed.

“I’m here to owe you an apology Sugarcube…”

“What?”

“Sorry darl, but I’ve doubted you a little from the start. You seem nice, you seem all fine and dandy, but Twilight’s attitude to you made me think she’s onto something. Today you proved that you ain’t a monster.” She told me.

I stood up and turned around to face her.

“Thank you, and I’m sorry too…”

“What for?”

“For Twilight, I’m sorry that your best friend is changing for the worse.” I mumbled sympathetically.

“It’s not your apology to make Sugarcube…”

Applejack turned around and walked back to the group, I picked up my trousers and shirt, got dressed, and then followed her, now calm and collective.



“I see you got dressed.” Rainbow Dash pointed out.

“What told you?” I teased.

Rarity was further back, whispering into Twilight’s ear, and then nudging her forward. The purple unicorn walked up to me before looking at the ground.

I’m sorry…

“What was that?” I asked.

I’m sorry…

“I can’t hear you.”

I said I’m sorry…

“Twilight, say it.” Rarity commanded.

“I’m sorry.” Twilight grunted.

{How quaint, a forced apology…} I thought to myself before speaking.

“Firstly, I know you’re not,” I said flatly, “secondly, even if you were sorry, I wouldn’t forgive you for all the things you’ve put me through…”

“What things have I put you through exactly?” She snorted.

“Only too much… You’ve insulted me and put me down since we met, you re-gained your magic during Ingeo’s capture and chose not to assist me when I could have been killed! You punched me in the face on the first day we met for crying out loud! You made my clone back there on the lake feel pain when you had the choice not to!
And worst of all… You ordered me to kill an innocent person…” I snarled, bearing my teeth.

Upon mentioning the last event, tears formed in my eyes, I had done something unspeakable and worthy of undying hatred, I had become a murderer…

“Oh please, that was an act, you stupid animal.” She spat.

“What?”

“That man on the bridge was a fake. I replicated his DNA from a worker at the airport when we first got off the plane.” She explained.

“I… Wh-what?” I stuttered.

“I wanted to test you, to see if you were really as evil as I’ve been informed. I wanted to see if you really were capable of murder, and you delivered just as I expected you would.” She told me.

“Wait… You’re saying the guy on the bridge-”

“Was a clone. Yes.” Twilight butted in, answering my question.

“I… I don’t unders-”

“Of course you wouldn’t understand, you’re simple, you’re dim-witted. But yes, that human on the bridge was a clone. Did you not notice his clothing?”

Looking back, his clothes looked like labour work clothes, but I didn’t stop to think about that.
If what Twilight was telling me was true, this could change everything… I wasn’t a murderer…

“Why?” I demanded.

“I wanted to test you.”

“Do you have any idea how traumatic it was?” I questioned her, choking up as I asked.

“Do you have any idea how much I don’t care? You’re a human, you are evil, your feelings are worth nothing; you have no sentimental value to me. You’re only here to help us find the orb shards, and that is all you’ll ever be, a tool.” She said coldly.

“So the man I killed was not real?” I asked again to clarity.

Yes! You dim-wit, I’ve said that about three times now!” She groaned.

“So I’m not a murderer?”

“I guess not, no. But I’m sure you will be one day, like the majority of your species.” She sighed.

I didn’t even care about Twilight’s vile attitude, not anymore. I was free of the burden that’s haunted me for weeks on end! I wasn’t a murderer! He was fake! He was just a clone!



“But Twilight, I thought you ran out of magic…?” Rainbow Dash spoke up.

“Yes, I did, but only after that spell. I told a justified lie in order to save my magic for that very moment, like all evil creatures, he needed to be tested for his worth.” She answered.

“Stop saying he’s evil, he’s not.” Pinkie said to Twilight, looking kind of sad for once.

“And how do you know that?”

“Because my Pinkie sense says he’s all clear, and on top of that, he’s smiley!” She said with a sweet smile.

“Just like your Pinkie sense said Princess Cadence was all clear, when she was Queen Chrysalis in disguise?” She rhetorically asked, leaning forward to her.

“Uhm, that… That was different, she was using a spell!”

“What makes you think he, isn’t using a spell?”

“I have no magic, smart-ass.” I said jokily.

“Will you both stop bickering like fillies on their first heat!?” Rarity scolded us.

The both of us shut up instantly.

“Focus on what’s actually important here, we have the first shard!” She continued to say.

I looked to the shard lying on the ground, Rarity was right, we needed to focus on the mission.

“So, now we have this shard, what happens now?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well I'll put this shard in my bag. Thanks to the enchantments, the next time I use the my tracking spell, it'll start tracing the second closest shard. We'll repeat the same process until all six shards are found.” Twilight explained.

“But don’t we need to be near the airport to get a good bearing?” I asked.

“Not any more, we have the first shard now, so I can just use the essence it carries to track the next one.” She told us.

“Fair enough…” I mumbled.

“What about the distance? What if it’s far away and we can’t get a plane over there?” I quizzed.

The group hummed, Twilight scratched her chin with a hoof, before Pinkie jumped up.

“Why doesn’t Twiley teleport there on her own because she’s got super strong magic, then wait for it to re-charge, then create a portal from her location to ours!” She squealed in delight.

The group fell silent.

{You're a genius…} I thought to myself.

“No I’m not! I’m a pony!” She giggled.

My mouth fell agape.

“Pinkie, nopony said anything.” Fluttershy said.

“Not out loud, no.” She agreed, before curling up into a ball and rolling backwards away from us.

“What is wrong with her…?” Rarity sighed with a warm smile.

I stayed quiet, still unsure of Pinkie’s mind reading ability.



“So, what about Callum’s phone thing? Can we use that to help find the next shard?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Yes, that can be of some help, I could combine the spell with the phone's enchantment to teleport myself closer to the area, meaning we’ll have less travel time.” Twilight answered.

“So, if you’re going to teleport there, how long will you be and what do we do in the meanwhile?” Rarity quizzed.

“Depending on the distance, I could be from a few days to a week, just find a safe location to stay I guess?” Twi shrugged.

“Not here in Brazil, it’s far too dangerous.” I said.

“What do you suggest then? Go back to England?” Twilight growled.

There was a small moment of silence, before Fluttershy spoke.

“That’s actually a pretty good idea…”

“Come to think of it, if a plane takes us back to Gatwick, we’ll be near my house again, we can stay somewhere at the back of my land, then we’ll be safe and hidden while you get to the next shard.” I pointed out.

“So you’re saying we need to go all the way back to the airport here in Brazil, and find a plane to England again?” Dash said, already knowing the answer.

“Along with hacking the flight tower again?” Twilight also asked.

“Pretty much…” I sighed.

The whole group moaned in frustration, Rarity kneaded the dirt with her hooves and Rainbow Dash flopped onto her side with annoyance.

“Come on guys. I know it'll take a while, but after we get back to England things will speed up, we’ll be able to get the shards a lot quicker than it took to find this one.” I reassured.

“How much time would it cut off?” Dash asked.

“Well, now we have the first shard, it should take at least a month off each shard, depending on where they are.”

“Thank sugary sweetie drops! Here I was, thinking it would take another whole twenty chapters just to find the next one!” Pinkie said with glee, wiping her forehead.

“What?” I quizzed.

“I mean, come on! What was he thinking? Putting all the walking and talking into the book, we’re done with all the boring filler chapters! We need action and more soppy emotional scenes! Add some more character development! Maybe some romance? And for Celestia’s sake, please get us out of Brazil by chapter twenty two!” She continued to shriek to herself like a nutcase.

“Pinkie, what the hell are you talking about?” I asked in utter shock and confusion.

“Oh, never mind.” Pinkie giggled and bounced away.

“She’s so random…” Dash stated.

“I don’t like it! I don’t like it!” Blu squawked.

“It’s about time you said something, you’ve been quiet for ages.” I said to the bird.

“Happy watching, happy watching.” He said as he fluttered over and onto my shoulder.

“If you crap on me, I will eat you.” I warned him.

“There’s a thing called manners, I have ‘em! I have ‘em!”

“Good.” I smirked.

“Are we going then?” Applejack asked.

“I need to eat first, I’m starving.” I replied.

“I’m with Callum, we need a rest.” Dash agreed.

Rarity took off her saddlebag, as did the others.

“We’ll stay here for about an hour or two to rest, then we move.” Twilight informed us.

“Got it.” Dash said as she opened her saddlebag in search of food.

Rarity levitated the plastic bag of croc meat to me, along with the tail.

“Anything you need to prepare this?” She asked.

“A fire, and a spit.” I replied.

“Oh wonderful! I was hoping we could use that again!” Rarity said with delight as she went to open her bag for a second time.

“Again?” I asked.

“Well, when we first came here we used it to hang a pot from and made butternut squash soup.” She told me.

“Mmnn… Butternut squash soup…” I mumbled, almost drooling.

It was a common fact that butternut squash was one of my favourite soups, that, and potato and leek.



Rarity’s bag expanded for a moment as she levitated out a four legged spit, luckily it could be readjusted to put two roasting sticks through the middle.

“Twilight dear, could you make a fireplace for us?” Rarity asked.

Twilight merely nodded and used her magic to make a small pit in the ground and then shoot a fireball into the middle, where a large flame formed.

“Flamey! Flamey!” Blu squawked as he flew off my shoulder and went to a nearby tree branch.

“I love magic…” I mumbled to myself.

I went to the nearest tree and broke off two straight branches to skewer the meat with. I came back to the group to find they were all watching me.

“What…?”

“Nothing.” Rainbow Dash lied.

“Seriously guys why are you all watching me?”

“We just want to watch you prepare the meat.” Fluttershy said.

“Why?”

“Because it’s interesting, watching you like this,” Rarity began, “you seemed so happy and comfortable with your life at home, you had a relatively comfortable life in England; you just had to go downstairs just to get food. Then we came along and took you out of that environment, and you developed to become a survivor in mere days, you’re displaying old hunter-gatherer traits. It’s just really interesting seeing how quickly you humans can adapt to new things.” She explained.

“Huh, I never looked at it that way, I just wanted to spit roast some croc meat.” I shrugged and went to the spit.

“You’re too modest dear…”

“I’m just getting by, there’s no modesty about it. I’m doing what needs to be done, that doesn’t require admiration.” I replied.

“Again… Too modest…”

I shrugged and took the crocodile meat before skewering the muscle along. I repeated this on the other stick until all the meat was gone, I left the tail just in case I didn’t eat it, there was a lot of meat there already without it. I put the sticks into the mounts and lowered it about two or three inches above the flame, and sat back.

“Now, we wait.” I sighed…



After a good half hour of letting the meat cook, occasionally turning the stick to cook both sides equally, the meat was ready, the outside was browned, but not too crispy, it was perfection…

“Oma-nom-nom…” I growled hungrily as I stared at the meat.

“It’s done?” Dash asked.

“Eeyup.” I grinned.

“It looks… Well, actually kind of nice…” She said quietly.

“Yeah, I don’t think eating it would do you any favours, your body would reject it pretty fast.” I said with a small chuckle.

“I never said I wanted to try it!” She spat.

“Yeah, but you thought it.” I teased.

She responded by sticking her tongue out, I chuckled again before taking one of the sticks off the spit.

“Croc’a doodle doo!” Blu squawked

I raised an eyebrow at the bird, who put his head on one side.

“What?”

“You, that’s what.” I answered.

“Don’t eat me! Don’t eat me!” He cawed jokily as he flew over to Fluttershy and landed on her shoulder.

I rolled my eyes and looked back to the meat, still steaming and juicy.

“Nom…” I mumbled.

I leant forward and took the first bite of any meat I’d eaten since I’d met the six, and holy… Fucking… Shit…


“I take it you like it?” Rarity asked, poking me.

That’s when I realised I had completely zoned out from what can only be described as a food-gasm, I had closed my eyes and sort of forgot who I was and where I was, regardless, I ignored the others and their odd looks, the croc meat was absolutely perfect, I hummed in delight before kissing the food.

“Oh meat, how I missed you… Oh I am never letting you out of my life again!” I cried.

“Dude, are you getting emotional over food?” Dash asked.

“Rainbow Dash, this experience to me, is like Pinkie without her cake…” I choked up, a tear forming in my eye.

Life without cake! Dear sweet Celestia no!” Pinkie wailed.

“Now that’s true love right there…” Applejack chuckled.

I grinned as I took another bite, and another, and another…
And another…

And another…



I had ploughed through both sticks, and was still hungry.

“You were hungry weren’t you?” Applejack giggled.

“I still am.” I growled as I licked my chops.

“Tail?” Rarity asked.

I looked at the large meaty crocodile tail, then back to the stick, and then back to Rarity.

“Tail.”

And on the spit it went…



Cooked, salted, and all ready to eat, I savagely ripped into the delicious meat, completely forgetting the ponies were watching as my lust for meat took over, I had gone for too long without eating a decent meal, let alone the warm juicy meat I craved, any other person in my shoes would understand…
I ate and ate and ate, until there was nothing left but the tail bone and the tough, tasteless cartilage that surrounded it. I dropped the bone by my side and flopped onto the ground, moaning in pleasure.

“You okay?” Dash asked.

“Mhmm…”

“Hey guys, check it out, Callum’s slipped into a food coma!” She laughed.

The others all joined in on the laughter, finding the whole situation amusing.

“I can’t believe you ate that much, you eat more than me!” Pinkie squeaked.

“Murr…”

“With an appetite like that, you could probably beat me at a pie eating contest at my rodeos!” Applejack told me, chuckling as she prodded my arm.

“Burr…”

“Please tell me you’re not going to throw up.” Rarity said, full of worry.

“Murble burble burr…”

“Food comas are funny.” Pinkie said dreamily.

Dash walked up to me and prodded my belly, causing a wrenching pain through my gut, I groaned in pain and rolled onto my side.

"Ooowww..." I moaned, sounding similar to a cow in labour.

“What was that for?” Pinkie demanded.

“To see if he’d puke or not.” She giggled back.

“That’s not very nice Dashie…”

“It was a joke Pinks.”

My vision was then taken over by a grumpy purple face.

“We need to move, get up.” Twilight ordered.

“I need a moment…” I replied, rubbing my tummy.

“Now.”

“Really, I need a moment.”

“We cannot stay here.”

“Murr…”

“Get… Up… Now…”

I moaned as I rolled to my side and tried to get up, only to sit cross legged.

“You’re pathetic.” Twilight scowled.

“Do you want me to grab your horn again?” I growled.

Twilight took a step back and looked afraid, only for Rainbow Dash to scream with laughter and fall to the ground in tears of uncontrollable bellowing.

GRAB… GRAB YOUR HORN… GRAB YOUR HORN AGAIN!!!” She squealed as she rolled around.

“Wow…” I mumbled.

I looked at Twilight with a dull, un-amused look, only for her to look at me with the same look, and for the first time we had a proper agreement together…
Rainbow Dash was a dirty minded sex pest…



“Righty ho… Let’s get moving.” I said after a good few minutes of recovering from my food coma.

Rainbow Dash had calmed herself now, and we were all getting ready to leave, Rarity had packed up the spit and the unappetising scraps of bone and cartilage had been thrown into the lake for the other crocodiles to engage in some sweet, sweet cannibalism.
I was just about to start walking when I felt something hard poke my back, I turned around to see Vladimir’s knife floating in front of me. Just ahead of that, was Twilight, her horn glowing.

“You forgot this.”

“Why do you care?” I questioned.

“When we were at your house on the first day, I remember one of your history books about medieval times; it mentioned that the best fighters carried signature weapons, which they gave names. Being a fighter, I assumed it would be in your interest to keep this and give it a name.” She told me.

I was slightly confused at this point, I wasn’t sure if Twilight was making an effort to be nice here, or if she was just emphasising I was a killer to make me feel bad. Either way, I took the knife and nodded my thanks.

“Right, let’s get moving.” I commanded.

The group looked to Twilight to see if she had any objections, and raised my eyebrow at her.

“What he said…” She muttered.

“Uhm… How do we find our way back to the airport?” Dash asked.

“My maps app.” I pointed out.

Rainbow Dash raised her eyebrows and nodded, before having another good question.

“How do we get back though, without being seen, and it taking forever?”

“Good point…” I mumbled.

“Speed boat! Speed Boat! Drive along the coast!” Blu squawked.

I looked at the bird with my eyebrows upraised.

“We’re in the middle of the jungle, how are we going to find a speedboat?” I scoffed.

“River south! Right to the docks! QUARK!”

“How do you know?” I asked, tilting my head on one side.

“Been here for years, been all over the place! Caark!” He replied calmly.

“Fair enough.” I shrugged.

It seemed Blu could be a lot of use to the group, with Rainbow Dash’s wings in their condition, Blu was the only one who can properly fly, as Fluttershy’s flying ability was obviously very poor, not to mention she’d be spotted by other people.

“Hey Blu?” I began.

The bird hopped onto Fluttershy’s head and looked at me.

“Myeeaass…?

“Do you want to join us on our adventure?”

The bird jumped from Fluttershy and flew in circles around me, before landing on my shoulder.

“Thought you’d never ask!” He squawked.

I chuckled, before tightening my bag straps.

“Well, south it is!” I said merrily before getting out my phone.

I opened up my Maps app and found the river Blu was hinting to, it was completely straight and led directly to the coast, it was quite a long walk, but it wasn’t complicated. I locked my phone and began walking, the group all stretched before joining me.

{Great, more damn walking…} I thought to myself.




A good few hours later, the jungle became a lot less dense as we approached the coastline. It wouldn’t be far until we reached the docks Blu mentioned, along with finding a speedboat, we’d be at the airport within the next few hours if we were lucky.

“My hooves hurt…” Pinkie moaned.

“My hooves hurt…” Rainbow Dash copied, mimicking Pinkie’s high pitched nasally squeak.

“My hooves hurt! My hooves hurt!” Blu squawked to mock the both of them.

“Are we there yet? We’ve been walking for miles.” Rarity asked.

I had been tracking our location on my phone on multiple occasions during the walk; we were no more than half a mile from the dock.

“We’re very close, don’t worry.” I assured her.

Just as I had said that, I turned back around to find we’d come to the edge of the jungle, and beyond that was a small dock.

“Well, the bird wasn’t lying.” I announced as I spotted a pale blue speedboat in the water.

“What if there are people there?” Dash asked cautiously.

“I’ll go and check it out.” I said, gesturing for the group to stay put.

I left the cover of the jungle and walked towards the dock, the soft spongy ground become harder as the dirt became gravel, my quiet footsteps become slightly louder as each step made a crunch, rather than a small rustle.
As I approached the docks I found two men, one was very old and had a large white goatee, the other looked in his twenties, he had slicked back hair and a small, thin moustache that made him look like an Italian pornstar.
After all the stuff that’d gone on lately with Ingeo and the crocs, I was in no mood for stealth.

“Mentlegen.” I spoke aloud as I walked forward.

They turned at the same time, the old man looked calm and careless towards my approach, while the younger man instantly saw me as a foe.

“Quién es usted? Sal de aquí niño!” He yelled at me.

I kept walking towards him, tensing my muscles and prepared myself to strike.

“Estás sordo? Dejar!” He shouted.

I ignored him and came closer still, this was when he clenched his fists and stormed towards me, gritting his teeth.

“Come on… Come on, come on, come on…” I muttered under my breath.

He started speed walking towards me before he finally approached me and instantly tried to swing his arm at me to hit me, I quickly ducked beneath it and thrust upwards with all of my body, my fist made contact with his jaw and I heard a small snap as his head shot backwards and his body jolted from the unexpected counter-attack. He was out like a light and fell onto his back, unconscious.

Nyeeaaah!!!” The old man yelled as he waddled towards the shed beside him.

I ran towards him, making sure he didn’t get away.
He went around the corner and I followed quickly, just as I was about to reach the corner he came back around with a double barrelled shotgun and aimed it at me. Without thinking I dived to the side and rolled out of the way as the gun went off near my head, a sharp pain went into my left ear and it started ringing. I shook my head and turned to face the old man who was turning to me, about to take his second shot. I rushed towards him and grabbed the barrel and main body of the gun, yanked it from his arms, and smacked him in the side of the head with the stock. Just as quickly as the first, he was unconscious and fell back into a heap on the ground. I dropped to my knees and put the gun down on the ground before putting a hand to my left ear, it was ringing and hurt like a bitch. I was like the pressure of going in an aeroplane, but on a much stronger level.

I stood up again and walked back to the younger man, where I was in eye-shot of the ponies. I put up my hand and waved to signal them over. I quickly saw all six of them leave the jungle and trot towards me.

“Dude, you're a ninja!” Rainbow Dash cheered.

I smirked, proud of myself.

“I heard a gunshot, are you hurt?” Rarity asked.

“No, my ear just aches a little; it went off by my head.” I answered, rubbing my ear.

“Oh dear…” She mumbled, unsure of what to do.

“I’ll be fine, it’ll wear off.” I said, shaking my head slowly in attempt to stop the ringing.

“I said you’d turn out to be a murderer soon enough.” Twilight spat.

“Calm your purple titties Twilight, they’re just unconscious. Besides, one tried to hit me, and the other tried to shoot me.” I retorted.

“Whatever.” She growled.

“Speedboat! Speedboat!” Blu squawked as he flew to the boat at the end of the dock.

{No doubt it belonged to the young guy with the porno’tashe.} I thought.

“Who were these people?” Applejack asked, looking at the unconscious man.

“No idea.” I said, rolling him over with a foot.

On his back was a symbol, there was a white circle and in the middle was a black shape, it looked a lot like a spider, but also quite like a hand.
I shrugged it off and looked to the shed.

“I’m just going to have a look in there, then we can be off.” I said.

They nodded and I went into the shed in search of ammunition for the old man’s shotgun while Blu was able to locate the keys to the speedboat in the younger man's pocket.



Inside the shed was a large boat, surprise, surprise. I looked inside it but found nothing, in the far corner of the shed was a large cardboard box, it looked rather promising so I jumped down from the boat and gave it a looksee.

“G’day g’day sexy…” I mumbled with a large grin as I opened up the box to find it stacked with shotgun cartridges.

I opened up my rucksack and put them all inside before zipping it up and slinging it back over my shoulders. I then left the shed and picked up the old man’s shotgun, which was now mine.

“I will call you… Wrinkleboom.” I grinned as I stroked the gun’s barrel.

“Wrinkleboom?” Dash asked.

“Wrinkleboom.” I replied.

“Why Wrinkleboom?”

“Why not Wrinkleboom?”

Stop saying Wrinkleboom!” Rarity demanded.

“Why should we stop saying Wrinkleboom?” I asked teasingly, smirking.

“Because it’s reeaally annoying…” She answered, frowning.

“Very well…” I sighed playfully, stroking Wrinkleboom’s barrel once more.

I looked around and put my hands on my hips, before looking over to the speedboat.

“Alright ladies, let’s not stand on ceremony here, let’s get ourselves back to England!” I cheered.

The group cheered and whinnied in agreement and joy, and we all headed down the dock to the boat.

“She’s a beauty!” I exclaimed as I stepped into the boat.

The others joined without saying a word and all sat down where they could.

“Do you know how to drive one of these things right?” Rainbow Dash asked me with an uncertain look.

“I prefer the term, 'learning on the job'…” I chuckled as I pulled the rev-cord to start the engine.



A few pulls later, the engine started rumbling and we were good to go.

I started up the propeller and turned the rudder so we would face outwards from the bank. The boat slowly turned out from the dock and began to enter the ocean, where I turned up the speed and we began to zoom off.

Yeehaw!” Applejack shouted.

“Yo! Ho! Ho! A pirate’s life for me!” I sang merrily to myself as we headed back to the airport.

Back… To home…