//------------------------------// // The Inept Wizard of Mann's Land (a.k.a. Meet Merasmus and the Bombinomicon) // Story: Equestria Fortress 2 // by nightelf37 //------------------------------// About damn time I finished this arc once and for all. I just couldn't find good enough Let's Plays of players actually working together to defeat Merasmus. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 En route to Ghost Fort, Chronicle was changing his attire using the Customizer. He had heard that the RED Heavy owned some…cosmetic items that made one question his masculinity, even though he was plenty manly in battle. For some reason, the stallion wanted to humor the RED Team with some girly attire of his own. Luckily for him, Thenam already had one certain familiar outfit ready, and right now he was looking for it in the throng of accessories that is in their collection. Unfortunately, during the MONOCULUS! battle, Thenam thought it appropriate to change how cosmetics go, and sorted all hats and miscellaneous items into one "cosmetic items" list. Given how they were sorted out now, he had to scroll a long time to reach his desired item. At the rate we're getting new stuff, Thenam'll have to upgrade the Customizer again soon. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 "All right, team," Tasic announced as he and the nine combatants stood inside the BLU spawn point. "This is the final win we need to net to end Merasmus's Eternal Halloween. Are you ready?" There were several grunts of affirmation. "Good. Here's the rundown of Ghost Fort, which is just a Haunted version of Lakeside. It's a 'King of the Hill', and you know the rules there. Although in here, one team has to hold it for seven minutes instead of three to win. In the center with the point is a Wheel of Fate, which spins whenever it's captured by either team. It has fourteen results, but only nine of which will take effect when it stops. "There's the Super Jump, which enables for higher jumps and protects from 'fall damage'. Super Speed, exactly that. Big Head, exactly that. Small Head, exactly that. No Gravity… well, low gravity, rather. A Dance-Off, which teleports everybody to the control point area, and forces all to dance for a while with Merasmus, which is very good news for the team that has a Sentry Gun there. Whammy, which rains Jarate on everybody, or somehow makes everybody bleed, or summons ghosts like in Eyeaduct. Even ÜberCharge, which is applied to everybody for eight seconds. "After a while, Merasmus will come in, and with him is the Bombinomicon, who is capable of speaking, and sometimes disobeys his master. Unlike most wizards, he's very tough in terms of defense, though his diversity in magic is lacking. Also unlike most Halloween 'bosses', you can land headshots on him. He'll only stick around for ninety seconds though, after which he'll leave, but he'll come back after a while. "Upon entry, he pushes everybody nearby away and destroys all stickybombs around him, also knocking back all stickybombs he comes in contact with. His repertoire of attacks are the following: melee with his staff, rolling bombs, setting targets on fire and launching them skyward, and hovering over the control point and using the Bombinomicon to spread bombs a wide range around the point. While doing the last one however, all hits landed on him will be critical hits. "Merasmus can also teleport, and when he does that, the Bombinomicon somehow encases the heads of a two of you (both sides) in a magic bomb, though you can still act as if it wasn't there. Unfortunately, you cannot attack while like this, though your movement speed increases. To remove your bomb, you either bash Merasmus with it, or let it detonate, which will damage you and anybody from the opposite team. When you do hit Merasmus, he'll be stunned, and you'll get an ÜberCharge, a Kritzkrieg Charge, and a speed boost." "I wonder how that even works," mused Twilight. "We still haven't looked up much on him, sorry. Moving on, when Merasmus finds himself getting weaker, he'll teleport away and disguise himself as a random prop, while other props are scattered about to throw you off. These props will bleed green liquid when attacked. If an incorrect prop is destroyed, it will drop a large Halloween pumpkin, which can be collected for a short crit. If the correct prop is destroyed, Merasmus will reappear and may be stunned for a short period of time, and the one who destroyed the prop is always given limited invulnerability, speed boost and crit boost, jut like when you deliver a bomb-head back to Merasmus. While disguised as a prop, Merasmus will slowly heal, so you have to do this quick. "Upon defeating Merasmus, he will disappear and be replaced by the Bombinomicon, which will remain for a few seconds, and anybody can use it to teleport to Skull Island, which is different from Loot Island. Up the hill there is a replica of Merasmus's hat in the cage it sits in. Entering the cage will return you to the main field. As with the Bombinomicon replica, collecting the skull hat is not required, so don't feel obligated to get it, understood?" EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 RED Team (A/N: Some of the RED Team's accessories are acquired from the Spectral Halloween Special, where Merasmus was introduced as a boss.) RED Scout's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Scattergun 2° Weapon - Bonk! Atomic Punch Melee Weapon - Bat Cosmetic 1 - Wrap Battler Cosmetic 2 - Spooky Sleeves Cosmetic 3 - Spooky Shoes RED Soldier's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Direct Hit 2° Weapon - Shotgun Melee Weapon - Market Gardener Cosmetic 1 - Zipperface Cosmetic 2 - Dead Little Buddy Cosmetic 3 - Shoestring Budget RED Pyro's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Degreaser 2° Weapon - Manmelter Melee Weapon - Axtinguisher Cosmetic 1 - Wraith Wrap Cosmetic 2 - Coffin Kit Cosmetic 3 - Unknown Monkeynaut RED Demoman's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Grenade Launcher 2° Weapon - Stickybomb Launcher Melee Weapon - Scottish Handshake Cosmetic 1 - Voodoo JuJu (Slight Return) Cosmetic 2 - Scottish Snarl Cosmetic 3 - Pickled Paws RED Heavy's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Brass Beast 2° Weapon - Sandvich Melee Weapon - Gloves of Running Urgently Cosmetic 1 - Grand Duchess Tiara Cosmetic 2 - Grand Duchess Tutu Cosmetic 3 - Grand Duchess Fairy Wings RED Engineer's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Shotgun 2° Weapon - Wrangler Melee Weapon - Golden Wrench Cosmetic 1 - Master Mind Cosmetic 2 - Frontier Flyboy Cosmetic 3 - Pip-Boy RED Medic's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Syringe Gun 2° Weapon - Kritzkrieg Melee Weapon - Ubersaw Cosmetic 1 - Einstein Cosmetic 2 - Dr. Gogglestache Cosmetic 3 - Emerald Jarate RED Sniper's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Huntsman 2° Weapon - Darwin's Danger Shield Melee Weapon - Tribalman's Shiv Cosmetic 1 - Ritzy Rick's Hair Fixative (no hat) Cosmetic 2 - Outback Intellectual Cosmetic 3 - Sir Hootsalot (Wilderness Style) RED Spy's Loadout: 2° Weapon - Enforcer 2° PDA - Dead Ringer Melee Weapon - Sharp Dresser Cosmetic 1 - Standard Cosmetic 2 - Griffin's Gog Cosmetic 3 - Exorcizor EqU Team Rainbow Dash's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Shortstop 2° Weapon - Bonk! Atomic Punch Melee Weapon - Saxxy Cosmetic 1 - Traveler's Fedora Cosmetic 2 - Archaeologist's Jacket Cosmetic 3 - Utility Bullwhip Derpy Hooves's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Direct Hit 2° Weapon - Shotgun Melee Weapon - Shovel Cosmetic 1 - Courier Helmet Cosmetic 2 - Mail Plating Cosmetic 3 - Pillar Leggings Pinkie Pie's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Flame Thrower 2° Weapon - Shotgun Melee Weapon - Powerjack Cosmetic 1 - HazMat Headcase Cosmetic 2 - HazMat Suit Cosmetic 3 - None Spike's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Grenade Launcher (Fire Breath) 2° Weapon - Chargin' Targe Melee Weapon - Gem-on-a-Stick -The lance was deemed impractical against Merasmus- Cosmetic 1 - Helm of Valor Cosmetic 2 - Demolition Spaulder Cosmetic 3 - King of Scotland Cape Chronicle's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Tomislav 2° Weapon - Shotgun Melee Weapon - Magic Horn Blade (Speedy Shoes) Cosmetic 1 - Sound Wave's Aqua Wig Cosmetic 2 - Sound Wave's Dress Cosmetic 3 - Sound Wave's E-Pichi Applejack's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Shotgun 2° Weapon - Wrangler Melee Weapon - Eureka Effect Cosmetic 1 - Strawman's Hat Cosmetic 2 - Out Farming Cosmetic 3 - Ironbuckers Fluttershy's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Crusader's Crossbow 2° Weapon - Kritzkrieg Melee Weapon - Amputator Cosmetic 1 - Cheater's Lament Cosmetic 2 - Divine Robes Cosmetic 3 - Arrows of Healin Twilight Sparkle's Loadout: 1° Weapon - Huntsman 2° Weapon - SMG Melee Weapon - Bushwacka Cosmetic 1 - Magician's Hat Cosmetic 2 - Mystical Cape Cosmetic 3 - Wand of Magicalness Rarity's Loadout: 2° Weapon - Revolver 2° PDA - Dead Ringer Melee Weapon - Black Rose Cosmetic 1 - Princess Cap Cosmetic 2 - Princess Dress Cosmetic 3 - Princess Slippers EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Before the battle, Fluttershy was advised to wear a special kind of goggles (the Pyrovision Goggles) to alleviate the constant fear. Actually, it was a (needless) way to keep her from being scared from Merasmus's skull, even though she saw it when EqU proper saw Merasmus in DeGroot Keep. She did check it out for a while before kindly turning the offer down; she cannot learn to be brave if she's being sheltered by the 'censor' of through the goggles. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 The RED Team was the first to claim the control point, its Heavy standing on it with his Medic. And boy was he a sight to see; he was wearing a ballerina tutu, a tiara, and "fairy wings". "Heavy is fairy tale… come to life!" he boasted as he repelled EqU from it. "Your Schadenfreude ends here, Doctor!" an unfamiliar voice came before the RED Medic was eliminated as if by an invisible bullet just like the RED Heavy's finger gun. The huge Russian turned to the shack holding the bottomless pit and saw a blue unicorn with very wavy blue hair, a short light blue dress with matching boots, star-shaped earrings and barrettes, and blue eyes. If it weren't for the Tomislav—which has effectively become a signature weapon—worn on the side, he wouldn't have recognized it was the EqU Heavy. He must be using magic to modify his voice. "So Heavy pony has girly costume too!" Before either could get into further banter, the Wheel of Fate close to the Control Point stopped and its result took effect. "ÜberCharge!" In a flash, everybody in the field were covered in ÜberCharge coats. For the RED Team, this meant a deep blood red. For EqU, they came in a wide plethora of colors, and because EqU's means of deploying it were different, Merasmus's spell made them shine brighter than RED's. Chronicle now shone like a deep sapphire as he ran toward the Control Point; while neither Heavy can "kill" the other right now, they can push each other. Rarity, who was just about to backstab the RED Scout, began to glow ghostly white, alerting the speedster, and making him scream and flee like a wuss. Rainbow Dash was now glowing bright cyan like the daytime sky. Spike glowed a brilliant shade of green. Applejack glowed road cone orange, also incidentally stopping a RED Spy's backstab as the two then confronted each other, the EqU Engineer keeping the spook from sapping her devices. Behind Spike, Fluttershy was now covered in a yellow ÜberCharge covering and, because of Merasmus's magic, now was bright like the sunrise, temporarily blinding all who saw it. Twilight Sparkle ÜberCharge coat, was a supernatural shade of purple, which fascinated her as she never got an ÜberCharge before. Derpy Hooves was now a beacon of silver as she joined Chronicle in pushing the RED Heavy off, though his other (main-offense) teammates have started to cluster in on the point as well. Leading the other EqU members to the point was Pinkie Pie, once again in her shining pink ÜberCharge coat. "Oh ho hoh!" the RED Medic laughed. "I have been in zhe wrong profession. I must learn zhis magic!" Like the Medi Gun's ÜberCharge, this would last only eight seconds, so they all did their best to make the most out of it before it wears off. Unfortunately for them, just before it ended, Merasmus decided to enter the field. "Merasmus arrives in a tide of blood!" he announced, then turned to one of the REDs and greeted, "Oh hello, Soldier." "Merasmus!" the crazed helmet-wearer, currently looking like his head was unzipped from the top, 'revealing' his skull. "I am going to pull a rabbit out of your ass!" Thanks to their previous 'alliance' against MONOCULUS, everybody had stopped attacking each other at the sight of Merasmus and were ready to unload everything at him. "Everybody! Attack ze vizard!" The RED Medic didn't need to tell them twice. But before they could do so, the skull-wearing wizard cast a spell that pushed everybody off the point. "Mortis Longdistimus!" At once, the RED Pyro, Spike, Derpy, and the RED Scout were sent flying upwards and were now on fire. It must've been no ordinary fire fire if it was sticking around on dragon scales and the rubber that is Pyro's suit, though it did not burn them nor did the EqU Demoman's card register afterburn. The RED Team already knew it, but the EqU Team was about to discover just how difficult Merasmus was. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Merasmus proved to be a real pain in the butt, moreso than the Horsemann and MONOCOLUS. One, unlike them, and just as Tasic told EqU, he has a wide array of attacks, and he knew when to best use them, and managed to adapt quickly against the new and smaller non-human combatants. His Bombinomicon wasn't exactly loyal, however, as the bomb heads were made by him and the tome himself tells them to run at the wizard. There's also the fact that unlike the previous two Halloween terrors, Merasmus has a head that can be hit for massive damage (the HHH's was just a haunted pumpkin). Also, sometimes, when a RED dies, but always when by Merasmus, their body vanishes instantly and a ghost akin to the ones in Eyeaduct appears, though they're incapable of scaring anybody. For some reason, EqU's respawn developed a similar system. The sent-away pony (or dragon) still goes into limbo, but spawning in their place in the battle area is a large spectral version of a parasprite that they can guide with their mind. On occasion, Merasmus may attacks these phantoms to no avail, allowing the ones still able to fight to shoot at Merasmus without fear of opposition from him. The wizard teleported yet again, and this time the Bombinomicon tagged the RED Spy and Fluttershy. Because these bombs are magical, whoever had them around their heads are still able to see their surroundings. He followed up with a whack of his staff—"Staffus Attackum!"—on a charging Rainbow, blowing her back. "Melee ain't gonna cut it, lass!" warned the RED Engineer as he Wrangled his Sentry Gun to attack Merasmus and not her. The pegasus Scout just growled as she resorted to the Shortstop and took potshots at the wizard. After Merasmus just finished blasting skyward a couple more opponents, including her, the EqU Medic was able to close in on the wizard and bonk the Wizard with her bomb-head ("Meanie!" "Bombinomicon! Betrayer!"), dispelling it and stunning him, allowing both teams to bombard him with attacks as she fired crossbow bolt after crossbow bolt before then pulled back to resume healing the team. The RED Spy stood by gentleman-like, waiting for Merasmus's 'stun time' to almost wear off before blowing him up as well, then doing high-damaged backstabs at the wizard. "Don't line 'em up too long, sheila," commented the RED Sniper as he and Twilight fired arrows at the wizard, the professional marksman scoring more hits, as they both stood near the as-of-yet-uncapturable control point. "Speed's just as important as accuracy." "My name's not Sheila," Twilight found the time to retort as she took into account the trajectory for her next shot. Working with bows was harder than working with guns. She did take the RED Sniper's words into account, though. "I know. 'sheila' just means 'girl' or 'woman' in Australia." "Oh." Twilight had already noticed the Sniper's brown owl with glowing eyes perched on his left shoulder, whom he named Sir Hootsalot. It reminded her of her own owl, Owlowiscious, though she was obviously not ever thinking of bringing him here even if she was allowed to. Pinkie Pie would one day, after seeing some of the mercenaries bring 'pets' along with them, ask if Thenam could create constructs of their pets to bring along. Just then, Merasmus teleported to the control point, and then took out his Bombinomicon. "Forbidden book! I unchain thee!" "Ey, guys!" it greeted, its voice…not at all that one would expect from a '-nomicon'. "It's a book!" gasped the RED Soldier. "He's going to read!" A Huntsman arrow was let off close to his head, though he barely noticed as he then rocket-jumped to a better position. "You got a problem with books?" Twilight took offense, though upon recognizing the Bombinomicon's threat she decided to attack it too. As the bomb-spouting tome rained explosions on the field, the RED Medic called out amidst the din of the kabooms. "Uh hello! Magic book? Do you still have Demoman's eye? I'll trade you a heart for it!" EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 "You have bested my magic! But can you withstand the dark power…of HIDING!" Before long, after a couple more 'deaths' from both sides, Merasmus decided to disappear and turn into a "prop" to heal, and it became a game of hide-and-seek, and everybody was calling for him to come out while attacking any item they knew wasn't there before (not counting the Engineers' buildings). "Come out, come out, wherever you are!" Pinkie Pie. "Merasmus! I've got yer nickel! Give me back me eye!" RED Demoman. "You can't hide from me, Merasmus!" Rainbow Dash. "Come on out Merasmus! I've got your body!" Soldier. "It's not burned! Looks pretty good! I might crawl in there myself!" A couple of ponies within earshot were both grossed out by what he said and bewildered that he expected this to work. "You could seriously use a new wardrobe, dear Merasmus!" Rarity. "Come out so I can fix those rags of yours!" "I'm gonna cave your little ghost skull in, magic man!" RED Scout. Amidst those calls, The RED Pyro was screening a "prop" when Merasmus came out of it. "Emergis Exmortis!" As soon as Merasmus was heard, everybody focused fire on him, the firebug moving away so as not to get caught in the crossfire. Pyros were more suited for a support role when it comes to battling the wizard. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 The battle raged on, the pit in the shed close to the point claimed more REDs than EqUs (mainly because over half of the latter had means to escape it), and the Heavy once said "Everyone! Friendship is stupid magic!", eliciting stray shots from each member of EqU. Unfortunately for them, they weren't able to take down Merasmus in time, and he managed to escape, taunting them with a "A-ha! Too slow! I leave!". The moment the wizard was gone, it was back to EqU vs RED. Because of how abrupt it is, despite having experienced this twice already, because they were just too close, the human team got the advantage, seizing the point with just over four minutes to go and with EqU well above five. And the worst part, the RED Team seemed to already know how to anticipate unicorn teleportation and have adapted tactics against it. The RED Sniper was now occasionally checking sniper nests that would normally be reachable only via the High Jump or Low Gravity fates. The RED Demoman occasionally plants a stickybomb or two before then detonating it behind him, then launching grenades there upon confirming a grunt/cry of pain. The RED Medic often very quickly turns around and tries to fill the teleporting unicorn's face with syringes. The RED Scout often turns to fill the opponent's face with lead or jump backward to whack them with his bat. And the other REDs had their own strategies. (The EqU Sniper and Heavy clones were also capable of teleportation, but not of any of Twilight's or Chronicle's diverse arsenal of spells apart from magic shots and telekinesis. Because the EqU Heavy clones can't cast the magic horn blade, they're given melee weapons instead like the frying pan or the Saxxy.) It wasn't long before Merasmus returned. Except that was because of the Dance Off fate. 'Luckily' for all who were involved, nobody was treated to Twilight's terrible dance moves, as they were all forced to mimic Merasmus's motions. Chronicle was immune to all magic that altered his mind or body (including that of reality warpers like Discord), but he decided to play along anyway, looking so completely fabulous in his singing idol outfit the REDs nearly forgot a male was under those clothes. The moment the dance ended, he already had his shotgun aimed at a RED and just a second later he has fired it. (Chronicle thought the Bleeding fate somehow managed to bypass his mind/body-alteration immunity via Merasmus's arcane arts, but it turns out it was caused by invisible energy blades swooping down on the victims and cutting them.) EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Eventually, just as RED had two minutes left on their clock with EqU having just over three, Merasmus returned to the battlefield proper with a "Cower fools! Merasmus is here!" Of course, everybody instead just—after moving away from the point—opened fire on the wizard with greater determination to defeat him. After yet another teleportation that 'planted' bomb heads into the RED Scout and Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy was just finished fixing up Applejack after she had been burnt and sent flying by Merasmus's spell, and her Sentry had to be destroyed by the REDs since she couldn't Wrangle it away from them, which would further hinder their efforts to defeat the wizard. "Fluttershy, get ready to use the charge!" called out Chronicle from comms system as he back-at-ya'd a bomb Merasmus rolled in his direction. "Do it on me, Spike, or Derpy, whoever's closest! I see the RED Scout closing in!" "Okay." Soon enough, the red-clad speedster reached Merasmus, and the EqU Medic quickly approached the dragonling, who was busy reloading his Grenade Launcher. Unfortunately, the wizard saw the RED Scout coming and whacked him with his staff, killing him (since the Scout had taken considerable damage prior). Fortunately, Pinkie came in out of nowhere, said "Surprise!", then her bomb-head blew up, stunning the wizard as the earth pony jumped away while firing her shotgun at him. Fluttershy immediately activated the Kritzkrieg ÜberCharge. Like the ones for RED and BLU, yellow sparks began to travel down the healing beam. Unlike the Kritzkrieg ÜberCharges of those teams, for EqU the Medi Gun and Spike's Grenade Launcher began to glow and cycle through the colors of the rainbow, although the crackle of electricity that came with critical weapons remained. Speaking of critical hits, during Domination and occasional bouts of crits, EqU's weapons merely glow the same color as their users in a standard ÜberCharge. The ensuing barrage from those critical grenades, a Kritzkrieg Charge to the RED Heavy, more Kritzkrieg Charges from clone Medics on heavy hitters, and all sorts of bullets and explosives brought Merasmus's health down to half already, forcing him to hide and heal himself. Somehow, despite starting at the RED side of the area, and despite just recently respawning, he quickly found the wizard in ten seconds flat somewhere at the (EqU-controlled) BLU side disguised as a tree stump. Merasmus promptly killed him with his knock-his-foes-skyward-and-set-them-on-fire spell. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 As the battle pressed on, all of a sudden, the final blow was stuck by the RED Soldier's rocket. "Nyyaaagh! I hate you so much, Soldier!" Merasmus cursed as he spun and flailed wildly in mid-air as he 'died' and vanished in green light. And with that, the Bombinomicon then appeared, looking a little larger than usual. Some of the REDs got in, and so did an EqU Scout clone (the one with the same colors as Scootaloo), and the rest returned to fighting each other. At Skull Island, the clone, under Tasic's direct control, hung back at the "docks" as the other REDs climbed the stairs leading to the giant skull on the top. In the distance, the clone could see Ghost Fort, where RED and EqU were still fighting. After a while, and seeing that RED claimed the control point, the clone was ordered to take the short way up (that is, flying), enter the giant Skull from the side, where a copy of Merasmus's ram skull hat and the Bombinomicon himself waited. "Well, you feel free to poke around, I guess. You know, looks like that's what you're doing anyway, right?" He let out a laugh. "Feel free to steal everything that isn't nailed down. Hey, I'm a book! What do I need with it?" The clone ignored him and went for the skull, collecting it for the Customizer archive…and returning the Scout clone to Ghost Fort with an ÜberCharge, and a full critical boost. She also promptly annihilated the REDs on the point thanks to Tasic's expert control and allowed EqU some breathing room to get back in the game. They only needed one more win to end Eternal Halloween. "Shoot," said Jothicu as he and Tasic watched the battle from the screens. "Shoulda told them to enter Skull Island for the ÜberCharge and crits, huh?" Tasic was seething from the fact that he had forgotten to impart this vital piece of information to the ponies (and dragon). Worse, he only discovered this now. Before he could say anything, a shadow loomed over him and Jothicu. Immediately, they turned around to see— EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 At the eventual end of the fight, the dark skies over Ghost Fort cleared, revealing it was just about twilight and that Merasmus's spell was stopped. EqU had managed to score the third win, with RED having 42 seconds on their clock. The RED team left to regrettably report back to the Administrator about their defeats. EqU was ready to depart as well, making their way back to the trailer… only to find something was wrong. Upon entering, they discovered the vehicle was empty, and that while there was a struggle, there was no blood spilt. At first, they suspected the RED Spy using the Your Eternal Reward, but further inspection revealed this was not the case, as revealed by a written letter Derpy found on the fridge where the food was stored. And Y.E.R.-stabbed bodies that weren't RED or BLU eventually decloaked after a full minute, and not a single invisible body was bumped into during the search. Hello, my little pony friends (and small dragon). You might be wondering where your humans are. Well, suffice to say, I have kidnapped them! If you wish to see them again, head for Mann Manor. We will discuss terms there. - The Horseless Headless Horsemann Needless to say, everybody was shocked at the news. Just minutes before their third victory, they had still heard Jothicu spout out some advice, and he wasn't cut off in any way nor did they hear any cries of distress over the noise of battle. And just how was the Horseless Headless Horsemann able to get here and kidnap the three so quietly, and then allegedly take them back to Mann Manor? Then again, not much of the Horsemann was known, so this could've been something new. "What are we gonna do?" asked Derpy. "They're our only way of going home!" "There's only one thing we can do," Twilight stated. "We have to return to Mann Manor." Spike brought up the next question. "But how are we gonna get there? None of us know how to drive this thing. And we'll need to drive it since that's how our respawn is working." Now that was something they didn't think of. Cars and the like didn't exist in Equestria, so there was no way driving was possible. However… The eight Equestria-natives turned to the only stallion around. The one who was a Story Crew member just like their kidnapped friends. The one who was not originally a pony. Chronicle knew what was coming next. "Oh, all right. I'm driving." This is not gonna end well. They didn't bother asking if he knew; he was the closest thing they got. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 To be frank, learning to drive (again) wasn't difficult. He's learned a few lessons prior to the Timer family being chosen to be Field Operatives for the Equestria Cluster, with his father being the assigned "Great Overseer" of their home base of operations, Hub Equestria. Naturally, years as a pony would render his skills rusty, though he managed to pick it up again by watching Tasic and Thenam drive (Jothicu's driving was rather lackluster), and there were vehicles in Hub Equestria he sometimes drove. There was one more problem however, which he realized once he was on the wheel. While he was certainly capable of gripping the wheel to steer (thanks to some strange properties of Equestrian pony hooves), even if he were to pull the seat all the way forward to accommodate his small size, his legs were just unable to reach the pedals. If the vehicle had only been something like a car or a van, perhaps he'd be able to drive it, even though he'd have to shift his entire leg to push the pedals. And he was too short to see through the front window if he was going to use the pedals in his current form. Thankfully, Rarity had also watched Tasic and Thenam drive and had asked how they operated, and so she served as the "pedal-pusher" (and gear-shifter). He didn't trust Twilight with such a delicate task, as she might push it too far and he would panic, and then she would panic, and things would get worse from there. He did have her on the passenger seat though, so she can look out for things he missed. He also had Spike handle the clutch. As for Chronicle, he stood on the driver's seat, his forelegs on the wheel; sitting wouldn't be of much use, and his telekinesis isn't fine-tuned like Rarity's. "All right, everypony," Chronicle called. "Ready for me to drive?" There was a hesitant chorus of agreement. "Here we go. First gear, Rarity, and ease into the pedal." It was a rocky start, but there were few shakes as the EqU trailer did a successful U-turn, and then slowly sped up, not wanting to waste any more time. They did have to slow down sometimes, so as not to catch the attention of the police, which would lead to the discovery of the Equestrians, and that was a big no-no, especially for Story Crew protocol. EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 As Chronicle drove, something inside the trailer was jostled during the bumpy start, having been shaken during the struggle that was the Horseless Headless Horsemann kidnapping their human companions. For some reason, upon taking the nine to Mann's Land, it was later found out that Thenam decided to lock away all memories pertaining to visits and encounters with other Story Crew members, which included the world-hop to Solaris Equestria, the Missing Rainbows incident, the visit of certain ponies from Luna Equestria, and the encounter of Chronicle's relatives when his friends entered his dreamscape. Now, those memories were flooding back into their minds as the locks in their brains were disabled by the something , which they all noticed the moment they thought of the members of LUNA, starting with Derpy thinking of her own Dinky Hooves, then of the 'other' Dinky Doo, then of that Ditzy Doo, then of having once been sorta-brainwashed into believing she was that world's Element of Kindness. Other memories pertaining to the members of LUNA flooded in too, like the entire ordeal with Antithesis, an anti-magical being somehow borne from the Element of Magic with a simple desire to end all that exists. Their world's Trixie and that world's Twilight being involved with both Spirits of Magic. The fact that Blue Diary, Chronicle's younger brother, was formerly an assassin. This struck a nerve in the Story Crew Field Operative as his friends started talking about what they have suddenly remembered. I can't believe it! Why did they block our memories of all that?! What was the point?! I'm gonna have to ask them later! But first, a rescue mission is in order! EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Cliffhanger! Man, my motivation's gone down when it came to Equestria Fortres 2. I'm glad to have this Halloween Arc over with, the one following this an "epilogue" for it (not the story). There are so many I want to cover, but I just had to finish this first. And what an ass-pull of a retcon, huh? I'd also like to give special thanks to MerlosTheMad, the author of My Little Marriage: Mary is a Mare. It's from his story I could logically see the issues regarding a pony driving a human vehicle. That, and a lot of other 'real' issues of being turned into an earth pony (without getting chucked into Equestria in the process), thus no pegasus flight or unicorn magic to make things easier. Sure, Chronicle is a unicorn, but the issue of driving still stands. But before we go, here are some lines pertaining to Ghost Fort and EqU's voice responses. Though if there're any missing lines, it's because I couldn't think of appropriate ones for them. Comment? EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Halloween responses ------------------------------------------ Ghost Fort responses ------------------------------------- Wheel of Fate outcomes -------------------------------- While Wheel of Fate spins --------------------------- Rainbow: Super Speed! Super Speed! Super Speed! Derpy: Come on! Muffin! Pinkie: I got a good feeling about this! Spike: Come on, come on! Chronicle: Applejack: Fluttershy: Twilight: I hope I get something good. Rarity: Not the Jarate, not the Jarate… Super Jump fate --------------------------- Rainbow: Derpy: Pinkie: Whoopee! Spike: Chronicle: Applejack: Fluttershy: Twilight: Rarity: Super Speed fate --------------------------- Rainbow: Thank you, Wheel of Fate! Derpy: Pinkie: Whee!! Spike: Whoooaaa! Chronicle: Oh, it's on now! Applejack: Whoo-ee! Fluttershy: (screams) Twilight: I always wondered how it feels to be like Rainbow Dash. Rarity: Waa-haa-haa-haa! Dance Off fate --------------------------- Rainbow: I got the moves! Derpy: Pinkie: Let's boogie! Spike: Oh yeah! Chronicle: Applejack: Well, this is awkward. Fluttershy: Twilight: Wow. I'm doing better than last time. Rarity: This is so embarrassing! No Gravity fate --------------------------- Pinkie: Whoopee!! Spike: All right! Chronicle: Just like on the moon! Twilight: This is very advanced magic! Fate wears off ---------------------- Pinkie: Oh well. It was fun. Spike: Aww… Chronicle: Fun while it lasted. Twilight: I'm gonna have to have to try and learn this. Big Head fate --------------------------- Rainbow: This isn't funny! Derpy: Yay! Big head! Pinkie: Wow! I got a big head! Spike: Aww, I wanted the rest of me to be big too. Chronicle: Applejack: Now this ain't funny! Fluttershy: Twilight: Rarity: Small Head fate --------------------------- Rainbow: Hey! Listen! Hey! Derpy: Yay! Small head! Pinkie: Wow! I got a teeny head! Spike: This isn't funny! Chronicle: Applejack: Consarn it! Not again! Fluttershy: (squeak, like a mouse) Twilight: Rarity: Whammy fate (Bleeding variant) --------------------------- Rainbow: Oww! This hurts! Derpy: Pinkie: Hey! This isn't funny at all! Spike: Aahh! How is this possible?! Chronicle: This can't be happening! Applejack: Fluttershy: (scream of anguish) Twilight: Such… dark… magic! Rarity: So much blood! Ooohhh! Positive fate --------------------------- Rainbow: All right! Derpy: Yaaay! Pinkie: Yippee! Spike: Yeah! Chronicle: All right! Applejack: Whooee! Fluttershy: (squee) Twilight: Hmm…this feels good. Rarity: Splendid! Negative fate --------------------------- Rainbow: Uh oh. Derpy: Huh? Pinkie: Uh oh! Spike: This can't be good. Chronicle: Dammit! Applejack: Consarn it! Fluttershy: Oh no. Twilight: Not good. Rarity: Oh my stars! During battle with Merasmus -------------------------------- Merasmus appears --------------------------- Rainbow: Here he comes! Derpy: I see him! Pinkie: Hi, Merasmus! Spike: There he is! Chronicle: There's Merasmus! Applejack: There he is! Let's take 'im down! Fluttershy: I see him. Twilight: Merasmus! Rarity: There's! The fashion! Abomination! Merasmus brings out Bombinomicon --------------------------- Rainbow: Merasmus has the book-bomb! Derpy: He's got the book bomb! Pinkie: Hey, it's the Bombinomicon! He's going to read! Spike: Hey! It's the Bombinomicon! Chronicle: Here comes the Bombinomicon! Applejack: Uh oh! It's that bomb-book! Fluttershy: Eep! The Bombinomicon! Twilight: Look out! It's the Bombinomicon! Rarity: Such a hideous book! Head turned into bomb --------------------------- Rainbow: I got a bomb on my head! Derpy: I got a bomb for a head! Yay! Pinkie: Bomb on my head! Bomb on my head! Spike: Hey! What's this on my head? Chronicle: This is not funny! Applejack: Now this just ain't right! Fluttershy: (yelp) Twilight: Now what kind of magic is this? Rarity: My beautiful head!! Successfully stun Merasmus --------------------------- Rainbow: Aww, yeah! Derpy: Oops! My bad! Pinkie: Surprise! Spike: Yeah! Chronicle: Gotcha! Applejack: Yere ya go! Fluttershy: Meanie! Twilight: Rarity: Here's your bomb! Merasmus attempts to heal himself --------------------------- Rainbow: The wizard's healing himself! Spike: Take him down! He's healing himself! Chronicle: The wizard's recovering! Take him down! Applejack: The wizard's healin'! Twilight: The wizard's recovering! We must stop him! Merasmus hides --------------------------- Rainbow: Coward! Derpy: Pinkie: Ooh! We're playing hide-and-seek?! I love hide-and-seek! Spike: Chronicle: You can't hide forever! Applejack: Fluttershy: Twilight: I'll find you, Merasmus. And your little book too! Rarity: Looking for Merasmus --------------------------- Rainbow: You can't hide from me, Merasmus! Derpy: Pinkie: Come out, come out, wherever you are! Spike: Chronicle: You can't hide forever! Applejack: Come on out, you skull-wearin' wizard! Fluttershy: Will you please come out, Mr. Merasmus? Twilight: I'll find you, Merasmus. Rarity: You could seriously use a new wardrobe, dear Merasmus! Come out so I can fix that ragged robe of yours! Singing Idol (Heavy) --------------------------- Chronicle: Pichi Pony Voice Live Start! Chronicle: (when killtaunting) LOVE SHOWER PITCH! Chronicle: (after kill) How about an encore?! Chronicle: (after kill) Encore wa ika ga?! Chronicle: Aqua Pony Voice! Chronicle: (at Medic) Your Schadenfreude ends here, Doctor! Chronicle: We'll show you the power of friendship! EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2—EF2 Sorry for how shoddy the chapter was. I couldn't find any good enough videos of good Ghost Fort gameplay where both sides did sufficiently bring down Merasmus. Well, I did find one, thankfully, but not one where they finished the round, just stuck around in the middle. See ya on Third!