“This is the Ponyville Police Department! We are giving you one last chance to surrender!”
The murderous pony peeked out the window. He meticulously counted the number of officers outside before barricading the door that led to his sanctuary.
There is no way these hick cops are going to catch me! While they are searching this massive warehouse, I’ll slip out unnoticed! Then I’ll have all this loot to my-
The killer felt something brush the top of his mane, causing him to swipe the air above him head with the weapon he used to kill Mr. Cake a few minutes prior. He laughed nervously, shaking his head with amusement.
I’m way too jumpy. If I’m going to get out of this a free stallion, I need to stay calm.
Using his magical aurora to hold his knife at the ready, the anxious pony watched the door in front of him. Anypony that entered would be leaving with multiple stab wounds if he had anything to say about it. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a silhouette along the right wall. Dropping his knife, he used his magic to hurl a piece of junk at where he swore he saw the outline of a pony a few moments prior.
“If there’s anypony there…stay back! I have a knife, and I’m not afraid to use it!”
The room remained quiet, allowing the outlaw unicorn relaxed a bit, sitting up against the wall, tapping his head with his hooves.
Come on, pull yourself together!
The sound of a door getting kicked in drew his to the other side of the room. In a blind rage, he ran to attack the intruder, but nopony was there. While scratching the top of his head, the confused stallion turned around, only to find himself face to face with a pony hanging from the ceiling. Startled, he covered his eyes with one hoof, while he brandished the knife at his suspended target.
“Stay back, I’m warning you,” he screamed. Removing his hoof from his face, the mysterious pony was gone. “Why are you doing this to me?”
“Why” The stealthy pony asked. “You killed an innocent pony tonight, and I’m here to see you get your just desserts.”
To his surprise, the unknown pony began laughing. “What’s so funny? What are you going to do to me?”
“I’m laughing because I said “just desserts”. Mr. Cake is…was Ponyville’s best baker.”
“Who’s Mr. Cake” the criminal asked, doing his best to keep calm.
The mysterious pony continued with her explanation. “The stallion you just killed…his name was Mr. Cake. He had a wife, two adorable children...and another young mare he treated like a daughter.”
The killer apologized profusely, slowly slinking toward the only way out. Just as he reached for the knob, the voice spoke one last time.
“Your actions have affected many ponies in this town, and because of that…you’re going to be punished!”
“Fine by me” The stallion cried, his knife hovering in front of him. “Why don’t you come down here and fight me, like an adult.” The criminal unicorn backed into what he thought was a wall, but upon turning around, he discovered it was a pony, hanging from a rope of some kind.
“Sounds like fun” Spider-Mare shouted, stunning her foe with a powerful head butt. “I know you prefer your victims to be innocent and unarmed, but let’s see how you do against somepony who has super duper spider powers!”
Gathering his bearings, the dazed stallion accepted her challenge. Running at the costumed crusader, he prepared to plunge his weapon into her, but his blind rage was no match for her agility. Spider-Mare easily avoided the attack, and delivered another blow, adding more insult to injury.
“Looks like I’m a cut above you” she taunted. “Fighting somepony who can actually fight back isn’t so fun, is it?”
“That’s it, play times over!” The infuriated killer ran at full speed, hoping to finally get a piece of his foe this time. To his dismay, the masked mare lifted one of her hooves in front of her face, shooting a strand of material toward him. To his surprise, the mare jerked his knife away, leaving him completely defenseless.
Realizing his defeat, the remorseful pony fell to his knees, and began begging for his life. His pleas fell upon deaf ears, however, Spider-Mare was not in a bargaining mood.
“Why?” Spider-Mare screamed. “Why did you kill Mr. Cake?”
To her surprise, he started crying. His hooves rested against his eyes, as he blubbered like a newborn foal. Agitated at this stallion’s behavior, the masked mare picked him up and forcefully pinned him against the wall. “If you don’t tell me why right now, I’ll stick you to the wall with so much taffy, it would take the foals at Ponyville Elementary a MONTH to eat it all.”
“It was an accident!” he cried, his hooves resting on Spider-Mare’s forehooves. “I just wanted the money, but he attacked first! It was self-defense, honest!”
That wasn’t a satisfying answer, so the mare continued to press the criminal into the wall.
“Why would you rob that place to begin with?”
Admitting he had nothing left to lose, the unicorn confessed it was his only way to support himself. “I’m a homeless pony. I can’t find work, mares won’t talk to me…I’m useless!” After taking a deep breath, he told Spider-Mare the robbery was supposed to be over quickly.
“This money was supposed to help me get back on the right path.”
The mare behind the mask suddenly began to feel for the stallion. While she was angry, Spider-Mare could also see he was having a hard time. She released her grip, and let him fall to the floor.
“Maybe you should turn yourself in?” the hero suggested. The stallion thought she was crazy.
“Are you kidding? Do you know what they do to stallions like me in prison?” he screamed.
Spider-Mare tried to reason with him, but the idea of spending many nights in the iron bar hotel wasn’t an option for the stallion on the lamb. “I rather die than go to prison.”
The costumed crusader felt her “Spider Sense” kick in. The police were outside the door, and the unmistakable metallic click of a pin being removed from a flash bang could be heard. Turning to the stallion that killed her mentor, she informed him of the situation that was unfolding.
“You either come with me, or go with them,” she explained. He held out a hoof, but the criminal apologized. Bending over and filling a hoof with dirt, he hurled it into her face. Temporarily blinded, Spider-Mare didn’t see the stallion run toward the window. She didn’t see him, peer of the edge, but she did hear the sound of shattering glass, which accompanied the pony’s five story journey to the pavement.
Oh no, what have I done?
As she stared at the flattened individual on the ground, the cops broke down the door. When the killer’s absence was noticed, they put two and two together.
“Spider-Mare killed him,” one of the officers cried. “Get her!”
Managing to escape, the heroic pony managed to evade police custody and arrive home. Upon removing her mask, Pinkie began to cry.
First, Mr. Cake was killed, than the stallion in the warehouse killed himself, the distraught mare couldn’t help but feel responsible for both deaths.
***
A few days later, the entire town of Ponyville gathered for Mr. Cake’s funeral. Against her wishes, Pinkie was asked to watch Pound and Pumpkin while the service occurred. As she supervised the foals from the playground, she couldn’t help but feel guilty. In her mind, she robbed them of their father, something the pink pony could never replace. Suddenly, she felt a hoof on her shoulder, which made the depressed jump out of the swing she was on.
“Gray Shade! You nearly scared me to death!”
The stallion apologized by kissing his girlfriend on the forhead. “Mrs. Cake said you’d be out here, so I thought I’d join you.” He began to push his mare on the swing, while he asked why she wasn’t her happy go lucky self.
“Because I killed two ponies,” she explained. Tears openly flowed down her face as she relayed the events from that faithful night to the only pony she trusted. “If I wasn’t for my stupid prank, Mr. Cake and that stallion would still be alive, Mrs. Cake would be happy, and the foals would have a father.”
Gray Shade stopped the swing before it could make another backwards motion. Gently, he rested his forehead against Pinkie’s so she was forced to look into his eyes.
“Snap out of it,” he said rather dryly. This surprised the upset mare; he was usually so understanding and kind.
“If you expect me to just “snap out of it”,” Pinkie said. “Then I must be missing something. I love making ponies happy, not killing them!”
“That EXACTLY what I’m talking about!” the gray earth pony enthused. “You make ponies HAPPY! Sitting on this swing, feeling sorry for yourself isn’t helping anypony.”
Feeling quite annoyed, she informed her boyfriend that she was responsible for not one, but two deaths.
“With all due respect Pinkie,” her very special sompony said, rolling his eyes. “You aren’t any more responsible for those deaths than I am.”
The dejected mare didn’t understand what her boyfriend meant, so she continued to hear him out.
“What was your state of mind when you told that stranger to go to Sugarcube Corner?”
After a moment of thought, Pinkie admitted it was a prank gone wrong.
“That’s exactly my point sweetheart,” the gray pony shouted, wrapping his hooves around the mare in front of him. “You had no intention of hurting Mr. Cake, you just wanted to prank him, which isn’t a bad thing. I know for a fact if you knew the strangers intentions, you wouldn’t have said anything, you would have kept your mouth shut.
At that moment, she realized Gray Shade might be onto something. As angry as she was Mr. Cake that night, causing any harm to him what so ever never crossed her mind.
“I suppose you’re right, but I can’t help but feel responsible,” she cried. “If I was at the bakery, doing what I was supposed to be doing, I…whoops sorry. Spider-Mare would have been able to stop him.”
“You can’t live your life by doing what others want you to do, Pinkie Pie,” the stallion cooed. “Instead of using his murder as a reason to feel sorry for yourself, why not use it as a positive experience.”
Simply staring at the pony in front of her, Pinkie asked how the death of the most important stallion in her life could be a good thing.
“Look at it this way,” Gray Shade explained. “You now understand how it feels to lose somepony close to you, so you could help prevent others from suffering as well.”
“Wow, I never thought of it that way,” Pinkie exclaimed. “I suppose that means you don’t want me to hang up my custom then?”
The stallion grinned as he playfully hit his girlfriend on the chin. “If you ever give up being Spider-Mare, I would be more than happy to don the outfit.
Looking Gray Shade up and down, the relieved pink pony had some bad news.
“I don’t think you’d fit in the tights.”
***
Once the reception at Sugarcube Corner finished, Mrs. Cake and Pinkie stood at the door, thanking guests for their support during these hard times.
“Mrs. Cake, I’m so sorry about your husband’s passing, he was a great stallion, and I considered him a great friend.
Nodding in agreement, she told the pony she appreciated his sentiments. “He was always quite fond of you as well, Filthy Rich.”
The young mare simply glared at the older business pony. She remembered what he said a few weeks ago.
You’ll all be sorry. You’ll all be sorry, and this place will be mine.
Before inheriting her genetic abilities, Pinkie believed the world to be vanilla cupcake, nothing but white and fluffy goodness throughout the tasty dessert. Now, she saw the world for what it truly was, a vanilla cupcake with chocolate chips. The cake was still delicious, but it wasn’t all fluffy and white, there were dark spots that threatened to change the taste of the treat. Luckily, Spider-Mare was the wrapper that held everything together.
Escorting the depressed widow to the couch, the suave stallion continued to converse with her, occasionally rubbing a leg with one of his hooves. This truly disgusted the young mare, that anypony in their right mind would do this sort of thing to a mare that just buried her husband. She walked into the kitchen, planning to keep an eye on the situation.
“I was wondering Cup, what’s going to happen to the bakery now?” Filthy Rich asked, brushing a strand of hair out of the blue mare’s face.
“No offense, but you can’t run a place like this on your own, let me take it off your hands.”
Mrs. Cake remained silent. In an effort to get what he wanted, the stallion continued to tell her what she wanted to hear. “I will turn this place into the BEST store in Equestria! In honor of your late husband, I would even name the building after him.” Placing his hoof under her chin, the insistent pony asked how she felt about it.
“Well, it’s rather sweet of you to make such a kind offer, but it’s not just my decision,” the mare said. “The co owner has a say in the sale of the property as well.”
Laughing heartily, the businesspony asked if she intended on holding a séance to summon Mr. Cake.
“No, that’s not what I mean.” Distancing herself from the stallion, she explained the bakery’s contingency plan. “Mr. Cake and I made an agreement years ago, that if one of us passed on, the surviving pony would transfer the deceased’s fifty percent of the ownership to a family member.”
Filthy Rich chuckled. “Well, you’re going to hold onto this place until your children are old enough to work here? That’s not very smart my dear.”
“My children aren’t the new co owner” she said. “Half the business belongs to Pinkie Pie.”
The seductive stallion’s nostrils failed for a moment, before calming down. “Well, she’s young. I’m sure we can work something out…”
Pinkie had heard enough. Forcefully pushing the kitchen door open, she made her presence known.
“There is nothing to work out, Filthy Rich,” the giddy mare announced. “With Mrs. Cake’s help, I think we can continue to produce the yummiest treats in Ponyville!”
Without saying a word, the angry business pony left the premises, leaving the two mare’s alone. The delighted young mare asked Cup Cake if she was telling the truth.
“Of course Pinkie,” she said, wrapping her hooves around the pink pony. “Regardless of what you thought, he always had your best interests at heart. To him, you were the perfect daughter; he hoped that our own little filly would turn out just like you.”
The happy pink mare told Mrs. Cake that Pumpkin could never turn out like her.
“Oh,” Mrs. Cake said. “Why is that? Is it because you’re one of a kind?”
“Nope, Pumpkin’s a unicorn!”
The blue mare began to laugh for the first time since her husband was taken from her. She squeezed her business partner as hard as she could. “Thank you Pinkie Pie, you have no idea how much I needed a laugh.”
Pinkie felt relieved. Mrs. Cake was beginning to move on from the recent tragedy, perhaps Gray Shade was right. I may not be able to bring Mr. Cake back, but I can prevent anyone else from getting hurt.
At that moment, the pink earthpony felt her Pinkie Sense tingling. She scanned the room looking for the source, and soon found it, as something shattered the living room window. Quickly, Pinkie threw herself and Mrs. Cake out of harm’s way. Picking her head up, she could see a pony in a ski mask walking towards her.
“What do you want?!” The mare knew she could take this thug, but didn’t want Mrs. Cake to know her secret, so the young mare feigned fear. The pony stood over her, glaring at her through his cheap disguise. A mixing bowl flew across the room, smacking the intruder in the head.
“PINKIE, RUN!” Mrs. Cake screamed. “Go upstairs and protect the foals!”
The masked thug slowly moved toward the blue mare, dodging everything she was throwing at him. Cornered and out of ammunition, the trapped mare tried to slap her attacker, but her feeble assault was easily blocked. Knocking the mare to the ground, the other pony stood over her, placing a knife against her throat.
“Time to cut the Cake,” said the stranger. Before he could do anything else, a new voice caught his attention.
“You know what goes great with cake?” The hoodlum turned just in time to watch a hoof connect with his face.
“Punch!”
The voice belonged to Ponyville’s masked vigilante, Spider-Mare, and she wasn’t happy with this new criminal.
“Can’t you bad guys leave these ponies alone?” the hero asked. “They have been through enough grief, give them a break.”
Climbing to his hooves, the intruder squared off with the super powered pony. “I’ll show you what I do to ponies that interfere with me!” The pony charged full speed with every intent of punishing the masked mare, but failed to notice the rolling pin on the floor. Once his hoof connected with the baking utensil, he fell forward, causing Spider-Mare to erupt with laughter.
“Oh Celestia, that was funny! Are you sure you’re a criminal, if so, it must be your first day.”
Attempting charge at the mare once again, the infuriated crook was in striking distance of his enemy…until she easily side stepped out of the way, causing him to fly through the swinging doors into the front of the store.
“STOP!” the hero cried, “I can’t breathe! You are official the worst bad pony I’ve ever seen!”
Breaking a display case, the attacker managed to balance a plate of cookies on his hooves.
“What are you going to do with those?” asked the super pony, “Raise my cholesterol? Give me cavities? No, I got it; you’re going to give me a tummy ache!”
Heaving the contents of the plate towards Spider-Mare, the thug attacked while she was distracted by the flying sweets. He broke the thick platter over her head, leaving her unconscious. Standing over his fallen enemy, he wanted to make she was out of commission. With his face inches away, the downed hero’s eyes burst open!
“Surprise!” Using her rear legs, she managed to hurl the bad pony through the same window he broke though. He stopped when he collided with the solid oak sign the stood in front of the store, knocking the criminal out cold.
Deciding Mrs. Cake was more important, she ran back to the kitchen. The upset mare hid in the corner, a frying pan in hoof to protect herself. Seeing the hero enter, she dropped the pan and ran to her.
“Thank you so much!” the elated blue mare screamed. “You saved my life, how can I repay you?”
Telling the baker thanks wasn’t necessary, the masked mare told Mrs. Cake to run to the police station. “You’ll be safe there. They will send officers over shortly, and take this mean pony away.
“What about my foals?” the distraught victim cried.
“I’ll remain here until its safe, now get the police!”
Running as fast as she could, the cubby baker ran to the police while the masked hero ran upstairs to the foals bedroom. Locking the door behind her, the heroic pony sat in the rocking chair, taking a moment to catch her breath.
Boy that was close! Luckily I was here this time…why are Pound and Pumpkin staring at me?
Walking over to the crib, the mare reached her hooves out to pick up the foals, only to realize she was still wearing her costume.
Oh, I get it. They have never seen Spider-Mare before…whoops.
Once the mask was peeled off, the twin giggled as they saw their sitter, Pinkie magically appear. Taking the foals out of their crib, the pink pony sat with them until help arrived.
“Ok you two, nopony knows I’m Spider-Mare, ok.” Pinkie said, smiling at the young ponies. “You guys need to keep this a secret, can you do that?”
***
“I can’t believe I blew it again!”
Filthy Rich ripped off his ski mask and threw it to the floor. Taking a seat in his study, the frustrated stallion couldn’t help but fume over his recent failure.
“I failed at getting the bakery by flirting with that fat mare, and by attempting to scare her!” He screamed. “Why can’t I just get the bakery and be done with it?!”
You want to know why?
Startled, the rich pony turned around. Excepting to see somepony else in the room, it was eerily empty.
“I thought I heard somepony else in here…”
You did.
“Who’s there?” Rushing to the fireplace, the stallion rested his hoof on a poker. “I’m warning you, I’m armed!”
What are you going to do? Hit yourself in the face? Put the sorry excuse for a weapon down, pour yourself a drink, and take a seat.
Doing as he was told, Filthy Rich took a seat near the fire, drink in hoof. “Ok, who are you?”
Take a drink! Go on, relax!
“I’m not thirsty,” said the wealthy earth pony. “I will relax once I know-“
I SAID DRINK!
Downing half his drink, the obedient stallion waited for further instructions.
Good, good. Now where was I…oh yes, you’re wondering who I am, aren’t you?
“Yes” Filthy Rich answered, becoming increasingly confused.
Well, how can I easily explain this…you know that little voice in your head? The one that’s helped you become the rich and successful pony you are today?
“Yes…why?”
You’re welcome.
The business pony couldn’t comprehend what was happening. “Who…who are you?”
I’m that little voice in the back of your head, the one that has helped you with every major problem you’ve faced, and now I’m here to help with a little…pest control.
“Pest control?” Filthy Rich couldn’t believe he was having this conversation. “What do you mean by that?”
We are going to take out Spider-Mare, obviously.
The business pony refused. “I want the bakery, Spider-Mare can do whatever she wants, I couldn’t care less.”
I’m afraid it doesn’t work like that, she will continue to show up if you pull any more horrendous stunts like you did earlier. Taking her out is the only way we can safely get what we want.
“Daddy?” Diamond Tiara walked into her father’s study, wondering why he was talking so loud. “Are you ok?”
“Of course sweetheart, why wouldn’t I be?”
The filly informed her father he was talking in two different voices. “It’s a little scary...”
The concerned father suddenly glared at his offspring. “Get out of her now, or I’LL SHOW YOU SCARY!” Flinging the glass toward the youngster, it missed her head by a matter of inches. Taking the hint, she ran away crying.
“Oh Celestia, why on earth would you do that,” the frustrated business pony asked.
She was distracting us…besides, she deserved it… she’s a bit of a brat. Anyway, what do you say? We find a way to dispose of the insect, then it will be smooth sailing to bakery ownership, deal?
Begrudgingly, Filthy Rich accepted the proposal, but he still had one question.
“How am I supposed to fight her? She’s stronger, faster, and has those web things?”
Hmm…you still have Diamond Tiara’s college fund, correct?
Replying that he did, the voice told him to use it to buy some new toys.
“What about our daughter’s future?”
Did you really think she was going to go to college? She’s destined to make a rich pony with low self esteem very unhappy and very broke. Now come on, let’s go shopping!