W.A.F.E.

by DNA Hochburger


Who are these?

Applejack is the first to arrive in the dining room. Well the first pony. DNA and FREEZER are already sitting at the table, both with something to drink. She seats herself next to DNA.

FREEZER throws a glance over his mug towards them. Something has changed between them, he knows it. In Canterlot she has chosen to seat furthest away from him, but now she decides to sit right next to DNA. Suspicious.

But before he can continue with his thoughts the orange mare begins to speak. "Whatcha drinking there, pardner?"

"Something I found in the cellar. Was the only thing alcoholic down there other than wine. It´s called Hard Apple Cider, pretty good actually, well better than some of the junk back where we come from," answers FREEZER, taking another gulp.

Applejack chukles dryly. "Oh well shugs, thanks. Ah´ll take that as a complament."

FREEZER raises an eyebrow, finally lifting his head fully. "Oh that´s interesting. That puts you in first place in my ranking."

DNA stands up.

Applejacks ears twitch. "First place in yer what now?"

"First place in my ranking. It´s something I use to decide who is bearable or useful and who is a pain in the ass. You are first, Pinks and Dash share second place just because they both are more relaxed, coller and more normal. Next is the yellow one. What´s her name again? Fluta... Futa... Oh right Fluttershy. So yeah she is such a high place because she didn´t do anything yet. Twilight is after her, she asks too much questions for my taste. In almost last is Sunbutt," Applejack frowns at that nickname, "because I think she plans something. And in DEAD last is Princess stuck-up of the moon for obvious reasons."

Applejack is about to retort, when she feels something scratching her head. She turns to find the source and discovers it rather quickly. "Care to explain?"

DNA looks down at her. "Oh I just always wanted to do this. But when it bothers you I can stop."

She shakes her head softly. "No, please continue, it feels rather nice," says Applejack even when she would never admit infront of her other friends. He nods in responds. Seeing that DNA will continue, she lays her head on the table and letting him caress her.

They stay like that for a while. After what feels like too short DNA stops scratching. Applejack is about to complain, when she hears the sound of hoofs coming closer. She turns her head to DNA and nods grateful.

Rainbow and Fluttershy appear in the doorway, the latter leans on the former for support. The butter coloured pegasus is covered in scratches and bruises.

Applejack lifts her head from the table. "What the hay `appened to you?"

"On our way back she tripped and fell into a really nasty thornbush. She also says her ankle hurts," explains Rainbow, while helping Fluttershy to lay down on one of the pillows.

I´m sorry-Ow-that I´m-Ow-so clumsy," apologizes Fluttershy herself.

"Don´t apologize for your own clumsiness," scolds her Rainbow.

"I´m sorry," is Fluttershys only responds.

DNA stands up and walks over to the two pegasi, leaning over Fluttershy, inspecting her wounds. She seems to shrink under his gaze. After some time DNA says: "I could help you."

Fluttershy perks up at this. "Can you?"

"Sure thing," answers DNA before continuing more softly and a bit hesistant, "that is when you want my help." Fluttershy thinks about it for a moment before nodding almost unnoticible. "Okay then, you have to think: Access granted. Visualize the words infront of your inner eye." She nods again, closing her eyes trying to imagine the words.

DNAs eyes flare up and bit by bit the first slash closes leaving only a bit of blood behind. This continues one by one, ever so slowly. Somewhere in between Raritys group slips in, but they stay silent when Rainbow motions them to.

After some more minutes of silence and staring the last of the cuts is sealed up. DNA let´s out an exhausted sigh, sweat running down his forehead. "You did good," praises DNA Fluttershy, patting her head. She smiles, clearly enjoying the patting as well as the praising.

Celestia walks up beside him. "That was quite interesting, what you did there. Care to explain?"

He turns towards her. "I did the same thing I done to you shoe. I repaired her body, but I can´t fix her ankle... yet. I need to learn more pony anatomy for that."

Celestia raises an eyebrow. "Why that?"

"You see, to create or to do anything with my DNA power I have to know how they work." Luna and Celestia nod, understanding what he means. "Anyway do you want to sit down and drink something, while you tell us about your tour?" They nod again in respondes.

A couple of minutes later they all have either tea, water or in FREEZERs case hard apple cider standing infront of them.

"So," starts DNA the conversation, "what did you guys do?"

"Well first we went to the throne room, it was simply stunning. From there we continued to the library, where we met Twilight. The poor dear was so deep in the books she barely noticed us. The rest of the time we just wandered the castle," summarizes Rarity before taking a sip of her tea.

"DNA, I have actually a question for you," mentions Celestia. DNA motions for her to continue. "When we were in the throne room there were not two, but four thrones. Why?"

DNA sets down his cup. "Question: How many basic elements are there?"

Celestia thinks about it for a second. "There are four elements: Water, Air, Fire and Earth. But how does... Oh that´s how," she is hit by the realisation, "The castle is called castle of the elements now. Wait that means there will come two more?" he nods, "So when will they arrive?"

He shrugs his shoulders. "I have no idea. But thank you for reminding me of something," he turns to Rarity, "Rarity, could you maybe help me with some banners for the castle?"

Her eyes begin to sparkle. "You can count on me. I shall help make this place regain some of his brilliance it once possessed."

He smiles at her with genuine graditute. "Thank you."

In that moment Twilight enters the room, a happy smile on her face and an assortment of books levitating beside her. "Oh hey Twilight, seems like you had alot of fun," comments DNA chukling slightly.

"Well I found some pretty rare books, of course I´m happy," explains Twilight, while seating herself next to mentor.

"SUPRISE," shouts Pinkie Pie as she jumps up from behind Twilight.

Twilight on her part jumps in shock a couple of units upwards. She turns around to her pink friend. "I didn´t know you were here already."

"I wasn´t. Just entered and thought I would suprise you guys," replies Pinkie.

"You certainly did," confirms Twilight.

The pink mare starts bouncing towards DNA. "I walked around the castle a looked for suprises," she stops infront of him, "and I found a really big one."

DNA sets down his cup with a grin. "That sounds interesting. I don´t suppose you could show me where it is."

She nods heavyly,"Sure," and hops onto his lap. "It´s right there," explains Pinkie and points seemingly random into the air.

"Here?" asks DNA also pointing into the air.

"Yupty yup yup," confirms Pinkie.

"I need to see this." DNA picks her up, rises from his position, seats Pinkie on the pillow he has been sitting on and walks out the door.

Everypony looks out the door, where DNA just exited moments ago. Dash is the first to ask. "Pinkie, what was that just now?"

Pinkie turns to her blue pegasus friend. "What do you mean, Dashie?" is Pinkies respondes, sounding comletely innocent.

"We all know you can be a bit random sometimes and we also know DNA is not the most normal one, but that was too crazy even for the two of you," replies Rainbow with just a hint of annoyance in her voice.

The answer stays out as they are distracted by a loud thud. They turn towards the source to find out it had been FREEZER slamming his mug onto the table. "I think I might be able to help there," startes the bored looking human, "Pinks there just showed DNA something on the map of our M.E.I.S.G. And if any of you wonder: It stands for Magical Enhanced Invisible Super Glasses."

"So what are they capable of?" inquires Twilight, inching a bit closer to him.

"It has a lot of functions and even we don´t know all of them... yet. One of the main functions is that it let´s us look at things a different way," answers FREEZER, regretting that he has nothing left of his drink. Upon receiving several raised eyebrows he continues. "You know when you put on shades and everything you see goes darker?" he gets nods, "Same principle. It´s like we put on different kind of glasses and each of them let us see different things, things differently or not at all. These glasses are called filters."

Celestia nods slowly, trying to process the information. "Could you give us an example, please?"

He groans, pinching the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes in the act. "At the moment we don´t have a lot of them," he thinks for a second and has a idea, "I mentioned a map before. That´s one of the filters. It creates a map infront of us, which only people with M.E.I.S.G. can see. It has a limited range and we have to have seen the place in order for it to appear on it. That´s the reason DNA and I can almost move freely in the casle by the way."

Celestia lightens up, having an idea. "Oh you mean like this?" She charges her horn with magic. A large map of Equestria appears in the air. It´s partially transparent, spinning slowly and 2-D. Above it hovers the word Equestria.

Rainbow turns away from the magical display to FREEZER in time to see it. Yep, there it is again. She has seen it on several occasion. "Why do you do that?"

The group turns towards her. "What do you mean?" replies the human.

"The tap at the head," answers Rainbow while tapping the side of her head, "I´ve seen you and DNA do it on several occasions and it looks too precise for it to be random."

FREEZER let´s out a whistle. "Impressive! Didn´t think any of you would notice. But yeah you´re right it has a purpose. It´s another function of our M.E.I.S.G. We can take photos with it. The thing is to take one we have to tap the side of our head." Twilight comes even closer.

"But from what did you do a picture?" inquires Celestia further.

"This place got the biggest libary I have ever seen, but all the maps are mostly outdated. So DNA said that if I find a map that´s up to date I should make a picture of it and send it to him."

That erects some eyebrows. "What do you mean with send? You live like in the same place and I know this place is huge, but not nearly big enough to send something," questions Rainbow.

"Right... You guys don´t have that. Ok imagine sending a letter to someone maybe the letter even has a picture in it, it would take days if not weeks for it to get where you want it to go. Now imagine that this process is done in a matter of seconds and then you got what DNA and I can do with our M.E.I.S.G.," explains FREEZER.

But then his ears hear something that´s way to close for his comfort. He turns to his right and his vision is filled with black, white and purple. More precisely the spakling eyes of Twilight Sparkle.

"Twilight?" starts FREEZER.

"Yes?" replies Twilight.

"Do you know what privacy?"

The purple unicorn blinks, realizing how close she is to him, blushes and quickly backs away before apologizing. The group of ponies laugh a bit at her. FREEZER waves a hand dismissly. "It´s fine, just try to remember." Twilight nods lightly, blushing a bit more.

The room falls in silence nopony knowing what to say or in FREEZERs case not even caring. After some minutes of this the human starts again. "Hey AJ," the mare in question raises her head from the table, "DNA says you should come to his location."

"Did he say why?"

"He says it´s about that thing from before," answers FREEZER.

She´s immediately on her hoofs. "Where?" it´s more a command than a question.

He raises an eyebrow, suddenly interested. "Ooooh that´s interesting. That´s the first time I´ve seen that from any of you guys."

"Where?" growls Applejack further.

FREEZER moves his hand, like one would do to shoo away a fly. A gust of wind can be heard going throught the tunnels of the castle. "Follow the wind, it will guide you to DNA," states FREEZER with a wicked grin. Applejack startes running where the wind is leading her, quite literally acually.

Normally Twilight would have been amazed by FREEZERs powers and would have started to question him all about them, but not this time. At the moment she is scared. Scared about loosing her freind. She has never seen Applejack like... this. She looks to the other ponies in the room where five others share her expression and Luna who doesn´t seem to be fazed by this at all.

Celestia glances to her sister. Luna what do you know? She would have to ask her later on.

Their thoughts are broken when FREEZERs voice speaks up again. "I´ve got a question for you guys. Who do you think is DNA?"

The question is odd, unexpected and nopony can answer it. When nopony replies FREEZER continues. "I´ll tell you who DNA is. DNA will always wear a smile to make you happy or brighten up your day when a rain cloud makes it dark, even when he himself is feeling like shit. DNA will lie to you, there´s no way around that and he is even going to use the truth to lie to you. He will tell you everything is just fine, even when there´s no way out of a situation. DNA will seem to have a plan, like he´s checking something off of a checklist, but most of the time he has not one fucking clue what his next step is going to be. DNA will stay by your side no matter how bad a situation might seem, DNA will help you in anyway he can, when you need him. DNA will do his own thing no matter what you say, but he will respect your privacy... mostly... when he feels like it.

But it feels like he changed, since I met him here," FREEZER stands up from the table and starts making his way to the door, "DNA said the following to me when I asked him who he is: 'Don´t you know. I´m DNA. DNA is everything and nothing.' So I ask you: Who is DNA? But that question can only be answered by yourself, " he stops at the door, putting a hand on the frame, turning his head to them, "By the way: Some of these things are the same for me," and with that he leaves them to their own thoughts, disappearing in tunnels of the castle.

The ponies in the room stare a couple of moments longer after him before turning towards each other. All of them confused. The room stays in silence once more as everypony thinks about the information FREEZER gave them.


Getting soft? a mild levle of deviousy in the mental voice.

No. Getting annoyed, replies FREEZER mentally.


Nopony notices as time passes.

"What the loooong face everypony?" interrupts DNA them with a wide grin on his face. Next to him stands Applejack with a rather somber expression.

Twilight forces a smile to her face. "Oh it´s nothing, FREEZER just gave us some food for thought," she pauses looking at the others before continuing, "DNA, who is FREEZER?"

DNAs smile gets kind of devious. "Oh suddenly interested in FREEZER are we?" Twilight blushes a bit, which causes DNA to chuckle lightly, "But sure I suppose I can tell you a bit about him. Let me think about it for a sec," he seats himself, tapping his chin, "FREEZER is more mature than I am, looking at the situation in a more serious way and is not so silly with his ideas. FREEZER doesn´t take orders from just anyone and even then he decides if he´s following them or not. He doesn´t like being looked down on either. I think that´s the reason he has such a problem with you, Luna."

The pony in question scoffs. "I have never looked down on him."

DNA nods his expression saddening a bit. "I know Luna, but in our old world their had been an incident with two princesses. And let´s just say it hasn´t been our most pleasant expirience."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He shakes his head,"No. At least not now. Now is not the time for that. I think we were at who FREEZER is," DNA takes a deep breather before continuing. "FREEZER has a strong sense of justice, that has gotten him into trouble more than once in his life. He is especially protective towards children. FREEZER will say you what he thinks and will use not the most polite vocabulary, if he feels the need for it, which is admittedly most of the time. FREEZER is a very open-minded individual giving everything a chance, that is if he feels like it. FREEZER seems like he´s grumpy, unhappy, unsatisfied and even annoyed the whole time, but he is actually a nice guy once you warm up to him enough and even then this attitude stays up most of the time. You could say he has a hard shell and a soft core."

DNA sighs. "But it feels like he changed since he arrived here or to say better since I saw him last. He has this fire... this determination. And I don´t know for what," the human pauses a small smile decorating his lips, "Not that it matters or anything. I know that whatever it is he is going to use it well. I don´t know what his goal is, I´m not even sure he knows it himself, but what I know is that no matter how much he changes he is going to have his reasons."

The small smile that DNA has slowly spreads throughout the room until everyone exept two have one. The first who hasn´t got one is Luna, because she still dislikes FREEZER. And the second one is Applejack. When Twilight looks up and sees her friends distress. Trying to bring her friend on other thoughts she begins a conversation. "So Applejack, what did DNA show you?"

Applejack tenses up at the question. The question she was afraid of. She is about to reply when the orange mare is interrupted before she is able to get even one word out. "Oh NO!"

Everypony looks towards the source of the voice and find DNA clenching his head with his hands. Celestia raises an eyebrow. "DNA, what is the matter?"

He turns towards them. "Well you see: humans have to do something ever so often," he tries to explain, blushing ever so slightly.

Twilight is obvious to the fact that this seems to be an uncomfortable topic for DNA. "What is it? Can I watch? Maybe I can get more information about humans." As she continues to talk the human gets progressivly smaller and redder.

Celestia observes this and nudges Twilight with her wing: "Twilight I´m happy to see you seek to expand you knowledge further, but this seems to be obviously a awkward subject for him," motioning to DNA.

The purple unicorns face also gets a slight tint of red. "I´m sorry, I didn´t notice."

DNA waves a hand dismissive. "It´s fine. It´s just isn´t something I like to talk about. But I need to ask all of you to take your leave now." His voice reminds more of that of Fluttershy than his usual overconfidant one.

The group of ponies nods understandingly and leave first the room and then the castle making their way back to Ponyville.


DNA is laying half on the floor and half on the sitting pillow. As he lays there another figure steps inside the room. FREEZER plops himself in the pillow opposite of DNA.

"So their gone?"

"Yup," is DNAs simple answer.

"Finally," exhales the green haired human with relief.

His counterpart sits up to look at him. "Oh come on. They weren´t so bad."

FREEZER leans his head on his hand. "Yeah, I guess you´re right. So what´s for dinner?"

"Healthy stuff," answers DNA as he makes his way to the door that connects the kitchen and the dinnig room. The last thing that DNA hears before entering is FREEZERs annoyed groan and something hitting the table, presumably FREEZERs head.