An Azure Future: Moving On
Why Are You Still Here?
John rolled off the couch onto the floor. It was a hell of a time last night, not that he could he remember it. He was pretty sure it rocked though. "Hey, what time is it?" He asked the ceiling from the floor, John had recently reactivated the penthouse's AI, which he dubbed Alfred. He had deactivated because he liked doing things on his own. Now that he lacked hands he needed the program as much as he hated to admit it.
"It is currently twelve thirty on a Friday afternoon. The temperature is seventy eight degrees with a nice refreshing breeze, perfect for a nice jog. Record shows you haven't done a run in nine years four months and thirteen days." A man's voice with a metallic tinge stated. Has it really been that long?
"Wait, twelve thirty in the afternoon?!" John jumped to his hooves panicking, he was Azure's ride to school and he slept in.
"He flew to school upon seeing he could not wake you from your unconscious state." The disembodied voice answered.
"Oh, um, what about lunch?"
"He made a peanut butter and tulip sandwich with a box of juice."
John felt odd. It was a feeling he never experienced before. His son got up and ready and even went to school by himself. Azure was growing up. It was apparent. I guess it’s true that ponies mature faster, but he's still a colt for now.
"Hm. Well then. I guess I got the rest of the day free then." John tapped a hoof to his muzzle, pondering. "I think I will... go places. Or something. I'll figure it out." John turned and headed out the door, grabbing the small sack of bits on his way. "If I'm not back before Azure is, assure him I don’t care." He called from the doorway before kicking it shut and trotting down the stairs to the top floor.
John surveyed the hallway. It was empty, everypony else at work to pay the absurd rent. He continued down the hallway to the main body of stairs. He looked down the center of the spiraling stairs, gauging it. Then he did an aerial somersault to the center, folded his wings and dead dropped towards the ground floor, flaring his wings at the last possible second for a gentle landing. So much better than an elevator.
"Sir, we don’t allow flying in the building." Cherry Pop, the receptionist called from behind her desk.
"Well thats a stupid rule and I want it gone." John responded as he trotted into the lobby.
"O-oh, Mr. Norris sir! I'm sorry, I-I didn’t know it was you!" She stammered, taken aback. "I'll amend the rules right away!" The peach colored earth pony began frantically sorting through a large binder kept on her side of the marble desk.
"Chill out Cherry, it doesn’t have to happen this second, just get to it whenever. In fact, go take a break. Hell, take tomorrow off. You work too damn hard." John tried, calming the mare down.
"Really sir?" She smiled, hopefully.
"Yeah sure, if your manager has a problem, have him talk to me." John jabbed a hoof at his chest for emphasis.
"Thank you sir!" She called as John exited the building, his hooves making a decidedly happy sound against the marble floor. Her smile grew until she was beaming. Hers was a thankless job and quite stressful. Time off was just what she needed.
The day was bright and cheery, and the streets had much less traffic then when John was usually out and about. Most of the time he just took a nap while Azure was at school. Okay, plan is... there is no plan! Alright, lets do it!
John looked up and down the street, flipped a mental coin and headed right. He half bounced and half trotted down the street. He had the only working active car left, so the street was used as an extended walkway. Though most stuck to the sidewalks out of pure habit.
John wandered aimlessly through the city he lived in almost his whole life. It wasn’t always this big, there was a time, however long ago, it was just a quaint little city. Nothing fancy in the slightest. Then he decided to make the town-city headquarters for Intelligent Designs. With the breakthrough in earthquake proof and automated construction technology that came with the AIs developed there, high rises were erected almost overnight. In a mere matter of months, his hometown surpassed LA as the hub of commerce on the west coast. It could be said that his 'improvements' were what showed the world how useless the working man was and murdered the employment rate, which went from a comfortable 8.4% to 47.8% in a week and kept climbing higher.
John dwelled on his rise to power and effect on the globe. If they teach human history in Equestria, I wonder how my role would be cast? Villain or Savior? John psychically shrugged at his own metaphysical question and carried on down the road.
He hadn’t gone too much further down the road when a small shop he'd never seen before, or at least never took notice of, caught his eye. It had various knick knacks in the window and the promise of more inside. It was the kind of store where one could drop any number of bits they pleased but more importantly it was the exact thing John didn't know he was looking for. Naturally, he headed inside.
The bell tinkled cheerfully as he trotted inside. Inside was various toys, telescopes, instruments, antiques, and much more. The layout was truly impressive. What was more impressive however, was the other shopper. "There is no way thats you because that'd be crazy stupid." John said pointedly at the offending pony.
"Nice to see you too John, how’s Azure?" The pony responded.
"Still dating your daughter." John returned the harmless question with a sharp jest.
"Okay, I’m probably going to regret this but... why are you still here? Celestia is out to make your ass grass. I have to hear the reason. Are there like, underground societies of people that need to be ponified?” John racked his brain to figure out exactly why such a wanted stallion would stay in a spot of such recent activities.
Grey shrugged, "Actually, Forest seems to be quite attached to this place. We've had to move many times due to my work, now that it’s pretty much 'watch and shoot' with the remnants of the human race we can stay. Is it my best idea? Probably not, but she's my little angel and she deserves a stable home for at least a few years." He shrugged as he finished.
"So... wanna grab a bite and catch up?" John offered.
"Sure, why not?"
**************
They found their way to a salad joint that boasted 31 flavors of lettuce. a place dedicated entirely to salad, what an idea. They already had their food in front of them. "So how have you been keeping busy since PER pretty much disbanded?
"Laying low mostly, I have enough bits to hide until the earth's rebirth as equestria, thanks to you." Grey stated while poking his salad with a fork gripped in his magic. "So what have you been up to?"
"Well, being a dad mostly. Taught Azure to fly. Drive him to school. Took him to see a magic show put on by some second rate equestrian show pony two weeks ago. Launched him out a window with his bed. Usual." John shrugged, the past always seemed boring compared to what the future could hold.
"Oh!" Grey perked up, remembering a question he desperately wanted an answer to. "What was your conversion dream like?"
John smiled a little at the faint memory, "Well..."
**********
John was standing, or maybe floating, he couldn’t tell. He was just kinda... there, formless in an empty void, as infinite as it was white. So... this is a conversion dream huh? I don’t see what the big deal is, it’s kinda boring. And lame. And stupid, really stupid. Shouldn’t I be getting life changing, belief shattering experiences right now?
Time ticked on, what seemed like hours passed by. Finally a voice came from the nothing, "Ooo, I'm SO sorry! I wasn’t expecting anyone right now, and I was helping Shining Armor with the boxes, we just got a new place and-" The voice apologized before John cut it off.
"Wait, where are you? Who are you?"
"Oh shoot, I forgot to manifest. Stupid dream world." In front of John the white nothing seemed to shimmer, slowly and surely an alicorn came into existence in front of him. She was a shade of pink with a multi-hued mane. What she wasn’t was Celestia or Luna. "Sorry about that, I'm Princess Cadence, nice to meet you!" The alicorn, Cadence, beamed.
"Wait, I thought Luna and Celestia were the only princesses. Also, that they did these... thingies." John did a waving motion with his nothing.
Cadence looked around at the nothing. "Yeah, they usually do do these things. Auntie Celestia told me I need to do more official government wise. So today I'm covering down for them." The princess shrugged and continued, "To be honest, I have no idea what I'm doing."
"Just my luck then." John rolled the nothing that was his eyes.
"Well, lets see what we have." A scroll appeared in front of the royal pony. "Hmmm, you ruined the earths economy and most of the biosphere almost single handedly. You helped the PER carry out a massive attack on the last vestiges of humanity. The list goes on, but it seems kinda pale in comparison to those offences. Hmmm, also says you wish to teach your son, who is a pegasus, how to fly but your slated for being a unicorn. Well that’s not going to fly, I'll just change that." Her horn glowed for a second and the nothing shifted.
Cadence threw the scroll behind her, where it ceased to exist. "Now as for the laundry list of offences, I'll cut you a deal. Celestia raises the sun, Luna does the moon and night, and I do love. So here’s what I'll do, you are currently single. You will fix that."
"Why?"
Cadence wore a smile more evil than a pony has a right to wear, "I don't have to play nice you know. I know a few nice stallions looking for a special somepony. Then again, I can also have you thrown in jail."
"Uhhh... WELL THEN! I guess I'll get right on that!" Silence permeated the area for a minute. "So... are we do-" The nothing sunk away, the world taking its place.
**********
"Really?" Grey Crusader managed between fits of laughter.
John shrugged, "Yeah, I didn’t even get a real princess. Just some second rate alicorn wannabe. But its not like you drink the juice for enlightenment."
"Well that’s a helluva story." Grey chuckled, his riotous laughter dying down with the end of the story. "We should do this more often, it was fun." Grey sighed. John had been relating the story for the better part of an hour, with plenty of breaks to nibble on the assortment in front of him.
"Well, you know where to find me." John smiled. "Now if you excuse me, Azure is due home any moment and I would do well to be there before him." He stood up and stretched his wings, groaning.
"Yeah, I should probably go pick up Forest. I'll see you around John." The unicorn cracked his neck, then lit his horn. Grey wore a severe look of concentration and vanished suddenly with a pop, teleporting away.
"Yeah, I think I'ma just wait at home..." He muttered to himself before exiting the building and taking off.
**********
John came down to a gentle landing on his balcony. He had left it unlocked ever since he learned how to fly, it was a useful entry and exit point. "Welcome back sir."
"Did Azure come back Al?" John asked as he stepped inside.
"Sorry, but your son has yet to arrive." The melodious synthetic voice rang through the penthouse. There was a slight pause, "Sir, your son has been detected and will be here momentarily."
"Cool, I guess I'm back just in time." John jumped and flipped onto the couch.
"Hey dad, I'm home." Azure called.
"Welcome home Azure." Alfred greeted.
"Hey, so how was school?" John asked, curious.
"Oh! I have something to for you to sign! For a field trip!" The young colt shrugged off his modified backpack and started digging through it. After a few moments he retrieved the sought document. "Here!" He hoofed the permission slip over.
John stared at it for a long moment. "Azure."
"Yeah dad?" He piqued, curious as to what his dad wanted.
"You know I can’t read Equestrian right?" John raised an eyebrow in question. He had been practicing the alien script for the past two weeks, but had yet to master it. "So where is this trip to, when is it, and do they need chaperones?"
"Its next Friday and I'm sure you can come if you want! We're going to the Yellowstone National Forest. The teacher said it’s important to see the natural wonders of the world before equestria swallows it." Azure beamed. John could see that he wanted to go.
"Alright then." John grabbed a pen off one of the lower shelves of the bookcase and signed it. "Here ya go," John hoofed the slip over to Azure who promptly put it in the old backpack. "Now come help me with dinner, we're having casserole. Alfred! Fire up the stove!" John walked towards the kitchen, Azure followed close behind.
__________Notes:
I thought this was going to be a weak boring filler chapter, but then I had a few good ideas and I made it work.
So I had the idea of Cadence doing a conversion dream and thought it’d be hilarious, the more I thought about the better it got. Shes like the goddess of love so that’d make the plot sensible!
Also:
I wrote this in under 50h, a new record! This must be what it’s like to be Chay and pump out a chapter almost erryday.