The Great Fandom Man!

by Jake Witt


ACT 1 PART 2

"OK. This is a dream... I open my eyes and I'm at home playing anything console related and not a bloody mess on a convention floor..." I carefully opened my right eye. "So far so- Its dark. Where am I?!" There was a noise and I was instantly alert, sitting up and looking around. Are those trees or people? On my wrist, a green light switched on.

*chirp. chirp.* "User Oscar Conners, would you like to run the tutorial program?" Iron Man's Jarvis said from my omnitrix, the light flickering at every syllable.

Like every genius, I gave a memorable response. "Say- whaaat?"

"What."

"Um... Who are you?"

"My current name is Jarvis in the A.I. files. You can call me anything you want."

Files? I wonder what voices he has, "You said there were an A.I. files?"

"Yes Oscar Conners, this is the A.I. setting menu. You can give and edit my appearance and change my voice, but I develop to your liking through learning. Are you talking about audio files or other files?"

"A.I. audio. What'cha got?"

"We have: Jarvis.mp3, Siri.mp3, Optimus Prime.mp3, Cortana.mp3, Clap Trap.mp3, and GLaDOS."

"I'd like Cortana to give me the tutorial," I said hesitantly. I tried to get up, but some stuff way keeping me down.

"Compensating for gear... done Oscar Conners."

My body had a glowing blue light, allowing me to some-what see myself. I nearly fell back down at the height I stood at. According to senpai, I was still sixteen, but physically a weak twenty year old. I wasn't a stick, but I wasn't mister muscle.

I held the real version of Captain America's shield. My armor was the same, except amazing instead of... OK, think of an ugly pheonix dying and rising from the ashes as the most beautiful thing ever seen. It was white with glowing blue light, except for my glowing green omnitrix. Suddenly my right eye saw only green as a scouter came into view, showing a female person.

"This is a scouter."


"Attach the Eye of Dashi to the Sword of the Storm." Cortana said evenly. I'd might as well have Siri telling me what to do!

I flew around, my shield hooked on my feet like Kingdom Heart's Goofy as I kept my grip on the impossible sword and holding what I called "Eye of Dashie" at the con in my other hand, attempting to attach it to the handle. Instead, every time Cortana said "Eye of Dashi" a line of lightning would leap from the medallion or the sword would move too crazy to do the job I was assigned.

"Why is this sword acting like the Serpent's Tail?!" I cried out from the speed, we actually were pulled up and was house surfing while a mob followed below.

"Data not found."

"Well, you're useful!"

"Thank you. Might I suggest a transformation?"

Transformation? What? Oh, wait, I have an omnitrix. "Um... sure. What're you thinking?"

"Aliens: xlr8, Ghost freak. Copies: Raimundo, Thor, Flash. Attribute: Wind. Armor: Speed." I saw the list on my scouter in different categories. "Might I recommend the Wind and Speed combo for beginners?"

"Do it!" I shouted as my armor turned a gray-red color. My shield disappeared and I began running as the sword eased its jerking. This went so well to the point that the sword was in my control, but not my fate.

---PRESENT DAY---

"The past is in the paaast~! Let it go! Let it go! Cant hold me back any-~!" I stopped my singing again as I muffled my voice. I couldn't focus hard enough to fly so I was just walked a lonely road. "My shadow's the only one that walks beside me~!"

Suddenly the world surrounded in white as I turned to see a giant rainbow looming over Ponyville and a royal chariot flying towards the small town. I shrugged and willingly spat out my sock and took out my light saber, luckily a laser blade shot out instead of tiny fireworks. Seeing my saber, I turned it off and activated my scouter.

[A.I. Reboot: 20%]

"Do I have to do this myself, again?!" I groaned as I swiped some codes, creating a white mp3 player with a blue light.

"My name is the Great Fandom Man! Call me!"

I rigged the mp3 to be indestructible or at least replaceable, play any music and sound from anywhere, and never run out of power. I smirked as I tossed the tiny devise into the multiverse, watching the portal I opened close.

"Ultimate Sonic the Hedgehog," I commanded, transforming into my version of Super Sonic as I flew off.