//------------------------------// // Laundry List // Story: Bloom Filter // by ferret //------------------------------// “Ah’m just sayin’ maybe you shouldn’t be jumpin’ to conclusions!” Applejack said with the four of them, sans Diamond Tiara, seated around the dinner table, which was now a round table discussion. “Ah know this whole pony thing has got your imagination riled up, but maybe this Diamond of yours just ain’t right in the head.” “If she ain’t so right in the head,” Apple Bloom countered, “Then why is it all about horses? She knew, sis. When she saw mah horse ears she recognized them. And even if she is, it don’t hurt to be you know, careful about it right?” “Careful about what?” Granny put in. “All she told yer was that Applejack was gonna change into a horse come the Fall Formal.” “Pony,” Big Macintosh offered. “Look now, if it was contagious it woulda gotten me already,” Applejack said resolutely. “If ah have any weird dream about some golden apple, ah’ll let you know, but otherwise it just ain’t gonna...uh...” “...I don’t see how as it could happen,” Applejack concluded awkwardly. “There was somethin’ else,” Apple Bloom said, “She said y’all were fighting a demon! Maybe you have to change into ponies or like, half ponies, to fight it or something.” “Like a...” Big Macintosh glanced aside with a little blush, “Magical girl or somethin’?” The silence ended with Applejack’s slow but hearty chuckle. “Tell you what sis,” she said amusedly, “Soon as ah find a magical locket that changes me into a horse girl you’ll be the first to know that our school is safe from the demons.” “Ah’m serious, Applejack!” Apple Bloom said hurtly, “What if she ain’t crazy? What if she really is seein’ visions of the future?” “She ain’t seeing visions of the future,” Applejack said flatly, “That’s just nonsense.” “So is changing into a pony,” Apple Bloom mumbled, sulkily. Granny Smith lay a hand on her back, as Apple Bloom hunched there in her booster seat. The gesture did make her feel a little better, at least. But not much. “Well,” Apple Bloom asked peevishly, “What is she seein’ visions of then? Visions of the past?” “Well ah sure don’t remember turnin’ into a pony, the last Fall Formal,” Applejack said with a wry grin, “Diamond Tiara hasn’t even... she’s in her first year y’see, so she hain’t yet... uh... “She hasn’t...” “Yeah, I know she hasn’t attended one before,” Apple Bloom said with droopy ears to a puzzled Applejack. “Ah just don’t think that it’s safe to say it’s all in her head.” “Not much evidence,” Big Macintosh pointed out, warningly. “We can just ask her,” Applejack said reluctantly, “She’ll either give us somethin’ falsifiable, or she won’t be able to put up, and we can all go home without catchin’ the crazy, or the horse.” “She has a hard time talkin’ about it,” Apple Bloom said, “Ah don’t wanna make her feel worse. She’s our guest after all!” “Hmm,” said Granny meaningfully. All heads turned towards her. “Okay so here’s what we do,” Granny said, pulling them into a huddle, even if Apple Bloom had to stand on top of the table to participate. Diamond Tiara woke groggily to the smell of horse. The pitch black night glowed dimly, from in through an unfamiliar window to her left. A moment of panic hit her, when she thought that maybe her roommates had done her even worse and snuck her into someone else’s bed so she’d get in more trouble for it, but... then she remembered whose bed she was laying in, and how she got to be there.Diamond lay her head back, and scrunched her hands against a forehead most generously endowed with messy purple tresses with white highlights. Now she felt horribly guilty, again. Diamond Tiara had come all this way just to yell at Apple Bloom, and to get her back for ruining her life, and all Apple Bloom gave her in return was kindness. It was a kindness she didn’t deserve. She deserved friends like her roommates who never gave her anything without expecting something in return. She deserved friends who were too busy studying to spend time with you. And yet here she was, just lying in someone’s bed as if she owned the place. She sat up all the way, and it got even worse. Something slipped down her chest and she grabbed it on impulse, pulling it up to look at it apprehensively in the darkness. It was a ribbon, no doubt a pink ribbon. Apple Bloom had even given her, her bow. It was the silliest, stupidest, most un-called-for, nicest thing. It made Diamond’s face scrunch up, and her eyes water. With a practiced ease, she crushed her urges as if with a cold steel boot heel, wiping off her eyes and standing up from the bed. They even gave her snacks. That was just, like, that was something else. Diamond wondered how long it had been, because she was already fiercely hungry again. To make matters worse, the whole house was permeated with the smell of something delicious. Diamond fumbled across the unfamiliar room, seeking the light switch. Her legs were so sore from all that walking, but she didn’t let it stop her. They would feel better if she worked them out a little anyway. It wasn’t too hard to find the switch, since there was a glimmer of light from the hall outside. She turned on the light only long enough to find the door knob, but didn’t stay in Apple Bloom’s room any longer. She just shoved the uncooperative door open, went out the hall and headed down the stairs. Diamond wondered if it was appropriate to weasel food out of someone, if you happened to be there during their dinner time. It was either that or be hungry though, an easy decision for a practical minded sort. It was such a surreally idyllic scene that Diamond Tiara saw from halfway up the stairwell, staring over the bannister railing. Apple Bloom’s family were seated at their dining room table, the portly Granny Smith who worked the cafeteria, Apple Bloom’s lanky athletic sister, and her uncomfortably handsome brother. It wasn’t just that a real family was just ...sitting there in the warm orange light, chatting in quiet tones, but there on the floor beside them was a little pony Apple Bloom, fast asleep, with her head resting against some drawing paper ...and crayons. It made Diamond Tiara wish—no, she was no dummy. Diamond Tiara had long since given up on the hope of being adopted, not this late in life. But the scene before her, while she didn’t allow herself to wish for it, it still reminded her wistfully of something she had a long time ago, so long ago that she couldn’t even remember it anymore. She continued down the stairs, attracting the attention of the Apple Family. The elder Ms. Smith gave her an apologetic look, glancing down to Apple Bloom, saying in her quavering voice, “She tried ter stay up for you, but the poor thing was jus’ too tuckered out.” “It’s... okay,” Diamond said uncomfortably, adding hastily, “Something smells like, really good?” Shoot. Was it appropriate to just ask for it, or was she supposed to wait for them to offer? “There’s still some in the pot,” the elderly matron stated for Diamond, “It’s a mite cold, but yer welcome to have yourself a bowl.” “Thanks,” Diamond said in a relieved tone, but stopped herself before moving into the kitchen, saying a bit more carefully to all three of them, “Thank you very much,” with as graceful a curtsey as Diamond Tiara could manage, while her everything was sore. She headed into the kitchen. It was a lot smaller than she was used to but, then again she wasn’t working in it, like she was used to. Just a pot there on the range top, of some sort of a tasty stew, and on the counter a... plate left out for her, with a big hunk of torn off bread on it. Yeah this was really ...sappy. A girl’s gotta eat though. She got that, and a glass of water, filled from the sink. Armed with those, she turned resolutely to face the Apple family again. Diamond Tiara ate in subdued silence, standing with her plate on the counter, because it just didn’t feel right to just sit down at a table full of that whole family. Their conversation earlier had died down, and they were all looking her way, like maybe they were expecting her to say something. “So, I guess you like, called the orphanage,” Diamond concluded reservedly. “Now hold on there missy,” Applejack said, quieter than she’d have liked with Apple Bloom sleeping right over there. “You’re in a huge amount of trouble, but that don’t mean we gotta be in trouble too.” “What do you mean?” Diamond Tiara asked confusedly. She didn’t let her confusion stop her from filling her rumbling belly any slower though. “Those folks back at the orphanage, they really do care for you,” Granny Smith said worriedly. That just made heat flare in Diamond’s chest, and she muttered, “No they don’t,” the moment those words hit her ears. “They’re gonna be worried sick about you,” Granny Smith pressed, “Didn’t you think they wouldn’t notice you wanderin’ off?” “Of course they’re going to be worried,” Diamond said snippily, “Only because I’m in trouble.” “There’s good people workin’ there,” Applejack put in. “They really do care about you, and every one of the kids there.” Diamond finished off her bread looking down thoughtfully. “Sorry, um... Applejack,” Diamond admitted reluctantly, “You’re right they do care about me. I just don’t think they like, care for me.” An uncomfortable silence followed. Diamond tried not to interrupt it by slurping from her spoon, but Granny interrupted it anyway, saying, “So we’re gonna drop yer off at the orphanage tomorrow mornin’, and ye can tell ‘em whatever you wanter tell ‘em. We ain’t callin’ them though, and we ain’t coverin’ for you. The thing is...” she paused in thought. Or sleepiness it was hard to tell. “If we tell ‘em you came all the way out here, then there’s no way they’d ever trust us enough to let you visit again.” Diamond paused. “Visit?” she asked skeptically. “Yeah, they’d think we’re a bad influence or somethin’, and we ain’t,” Applejack clarified assertively. “No, I mean like–” Diamond carefully put her bowl down asking bemusedly, “You want me to visit?” “Eeyup.” Three guesses as to who said that. Applejack looked at Diamond a bit worriedly. “Apple Bloom does at any rate,” she said uneasily, “You’re her friend, and that’s good enough for me. Why wouldn’t she want you to come over?” “She wouldn’t!” Diamond said erratically, “I mean, she would! I mean... there’s no reason she wouldn’t but... I could like, ask if... I like–I don’t know how it works, to be honest.” “Well,” Granny mused, “What’d ye do the last time someone asked you to visit?” Diamond paused, and answered bluntly, “I didn’t.” At their uncomprehending looks, she swallowed the lump in her throat that wasn’t stew and said, “Like, I mean, nobody asked me to visit yet.” “As of when?” Granny said uncomfortably. “Um... ever?” Diamond offered a bit derisively. It was clear Apple Bloom’s blockheadedness was inherited. What did Diamond Tiara have to say? Nobody likes me? My friends don’t care about me? This is my first time in somebody’s house in my entire life since before I can remember? “What about that Silver girl?” Applejack spoke up brightly, and too loudly, “Ah seem to remember you two were thick as thieves at one point.” That outburst was what woke Apple Bloom up it turns out, but it took awhile for them to notice, and for the pony to rouse herself. So Diamond continued, “She like...” Diamond didn’t continue. Diamond wasn’t sure what to make of Applejack knowing about her and Silver’s increasingly tenuous relationship. “...we’re just friends at school,” Diamond finally decided to admit, “She never asked... I mean, it never, like, came up.” Not that Diamond Tiara was jealous or anything of Silver, with her own big house, and her own real father and mother, and her own fancy computer equipment to give her all the company she needs. No way, if Silver thought she was annoying and clingy it was Silver’s fault, and Diamond was perfectly fine with—what on earth is that noise? Apple Bloom didn’t sound precisely like a goat when she was waking up, but she didn’t sound precisely like a human either. She murmured restlessly, and yawned, and her eyes cracked open. It was a quiet sound, but still enough of a sound to catch Diamond’s, and everyone in the room’s attention though. Diamond Tiara watched with barely repressed amusement as Apple Bloom looked around confusedly, and on spotting Diamond, her little baby horse eyes got as big as plates. “Oh mah gosh ah fell asleep!” Apple Bloom squealed surprisedly, struggling woozily to her feet. She did it by jumping up on her front feet and bouncing forward to set her back feet down, and it would have been more impressive if her legs weren’t so tiny. Apple Bloom barely had any height to travel, between sitting down and standing up. Apple Bloom started to eke out, apologetically, “Ah’m sorry Di—” “It’s fine, Apple Bloom,” Applejack cut her off saying, “You looked like you needed your sleep anyway.” “But I’m no’...” Apple Bloom yawned despite herself, a big gaping yawn that you would never see a horse do. “I dunno why ah keep getting so sleepy!” she grumbled crankily, looking dimly at the ground. Diamond could not believe how terribly adorable that was. Horses weren’t supposed to look that cute! Apple Bloom wasn’t supposed to be that cute! “We were just talkin’ about your friend here come visitin’ again,” Granny Smith said, leaving Apple Bloom’s little complaint to stand by itself. “Oh goo...ood,” Apple Bloom said with another tired yawn. “When’s she (yawn) coming over...?” The poor little pony still looked asleep on her feet, practically. “We’re workin’ that out now,” Applejack said, “You wanna uh, get on to bed now?” “Ah’m fine,” Apple Bloom insisted, shaking her bowless head, trying to clear it and standing up straighter. Fat chance of that. Her tail started drooping right away, shortly followed by her head again. Diamond wouldn’t have been able to hold back a laugh if Granny hadn’t immediately started addressing the situation, attracting their immediate attention. “Mah good sister Ethel had it all figured out,” Granny Smith pointed out in a practical tone, attracting Diamond’s attention, “We’ll just call the director and ask if you can come over. It might take a while, but it’ll happen, an’ it’ll be lots easier than what you did today!” “Yeah, um...” Diamond squirmed uncomfortably at the mention of... what she did today. Applejack meantime leaned forward on the table facing Diamond, saying, “We’re gonna let you off at the orphanage, and we ain’t gonna make no trouble. You can tell them what you want, but this ain’t somethin’ you can just brush aside. Somethin’ serious is goin’ on with you, and you have to address it. So ah want you to promise me you’re gonna tell someone about this. You talk to a shrink, right?” Diamond felt like she wanted to wither away into ash, as she admitted bitterly, “Well, yeah?” trying to make Applejack sound like the dumb one for saying something obvious. “They cain’t get you in trouble if you tell the doc about what happened today,” Applejack continued gently. “They gotta ‘confidentiality’ agreement and all. So ah need you to promise me you’ll tell them the whole truth, so they know that everythin’s not okay with ya.” “Why should I?” Diamond whined, crossing her arms. “Cuz then we won’t,” Big Macintosh said ominously. Applejack shot him a nasty look, and then said to Diamond, “Because they can help you too, and there’s nothin’ wrong with that. You don’t wanna leave your problems all on the shoulders of poor little Apple Bloom here, do ya?” Diamond looked at Apple Bloom, with a spear of guilt twinging inside her. “I guess not,” she said defeatedly. “Okay, I... Apple Bloom?” Diamond Tiara paused, looking at her pony friend perplexedly. “Do you promise?” Applejack reiterated emphatically, not looking away from Diamond. Diamond shot a glance at Applejack whispering harshly, “Yes, I—I promise. But look at Apple Bloom!” All four pairs of eyes turned to Apple Bloom, who was standing there like she was listening to them, but her eyes were closed and her head was nodding slightly, and if you paid attention you could hear a quiet snore coming from her mouth. Failing to suppress a chuckle, Applejack said “Well ain’t that just plum gravy,” in a tender sort of voice. “Ah think you two better get to bed. You got a long day ahead of you, and Apple Bloom is just plum tuckered out.” “Ah think we should all git to bed,” Granny said, the chair protesting her weight as she stood up ponderously. “Ain’t much this gal got left in her tonight.” “Sorry I like, kept you up or something,” Diamond said with a glance down at her plate and cup. “I’ll go wash these off,” she said, turning for the sink. “Just leave ‘em in the sink,” Granny called after her. Diamond’s face scrunched up anxiously. She really didn’t know how to do this sort of thing. Carefully placing the plates in the sink and not doing any dishes in there like she was usually supposed to, Diamond returned to the dining area in seconds instead of minutes. There Granny was already heading (slowly) up the stairs to where the bedrooms were. Apple Bloom’s gorgeous brother, Big Macintosh was standing off toward the middle of the room, right before the little pony Apple Bloom, looking down at her standing there asleep with a pensive expression. He bent over and wrapped his arm around Apple Bloom’s barrel, and then just lifted her bodily up into the air. The edges of her dress and her bright red tail waved limply back and forth in the air below her. The incredible thing is, she didn’t even wake up. She almost did, but her tail went limp again, and she just leaned insensately against his broad chest. Another murmur might have escaped her, but that was it. Somehow Apple Bloom’s brother managed to pick her up without waking her at all. It was like she was a little kid or something! Diamond Tiara walked over shyly, before whispering to him, “You’re really good at that.” “She’s good at stayin up too late,” Big Macintosh said simply, turning and walking up the stairs with deliberation. After looking at his back uncertainly, waiting for an invitation that didn’t come, Diamond Tiara crept up the stairs after him. She watched that brother of Apple Bloom’s lay Apple Bloom in her own bed, like she was a figure of the most delicate porcelain, pulling back the covers with one arm to lay her down on the soft sheets, and then pulling the covers right up to Apple Bloom’s tiny little horse muzzle. He started to tiptoe away from the bed and stopped at the sight of Diamond standing there as if he forgot she was there. He straightened up again and looked her down uncertainly. Diamond Tiara found herself a bit lost for words, looking up at him with an increasingly racing heart. “Guest room’s full of crates,” Big Mac said as if in explanation, or more likely apology. Diamond blushed at his even gaze, trying not to think about how handsome he was, or how sad it was he so rarely used his beautiful voice, or how kind he was or how good with kids he turned out to be. All these things, she decidedly did not think about, instead saying, “That’s okay I don’t, like—” she cursed her stupid twisty tongue and repeated, “I don’t ...mind.” What did that even mean?! He walked silently past the stiffly standing Diamond Tiara. The younger girl was still new to these sorts of feelings beginning to awaken in her, and the older boy’s feelings were as enigmatic to her as his thoughts and actions. She would never think of—with an upperclassman! He’d never... it would be inappropriate, and totally wrong. Still it didn’t hurt to appreciate, his um. Things she was not going to think about. He returned with an armload of blankets. Whu? Big Macintosh returned to Apple Bloom’s room, with his arms full of thick blankets and a couple of pillows. He held them out to her, and Diamond took them, almost buried by them before she set them hastily on the floor. “That’ll be great like, um, Big... Macintosh,” Diamond Tiara said, not sure if she was supposed to call him by his name or not. But it’d be stupid to call him Mr. Macintosh. He didn’t answer, just walking for the door again. It wasn’t like he was upset or anything. If anything, he was busy yawning. But he was so very infuriatingly quiet! Then he paused halfway out of the room, turned his shoulders a bit and said, “Thanks.” “Me?” Diamond asked uncomprehendingly. He nodded, and she said, “What for?” “Bein’ there for Apple Bloom,” Big Mac answered, looking over at the poster bed in which a tiny horse was sleeping. “Not many care ‘bout what happened to her.” She waited for him to explain himself, but he just turned to leave again, and Diamond blurted tensely, “Big Macintosh—!” He paused to look over his shoulder. “You’re welcome,” Diamond , as gracefully as she could say with her brains apparantly leaking out her ears or something. He walked into the darkness then, and pushed the door almost shut behind him. The hall light turned on with a quiet flick. Diamond only stood there a moment, then shook her head and went over to the light switch on her side of the wall. She flicked off the bedroom light, and in the darkness dragged the mass of blankets and pillows over to the side of Apple Bloom’s bed. It certainly wasn’t a sleeping bag, or a bed, but it would have to do. First, Diamond removed her precious tiara, and set it carefully on the dresser against the wall. Backing up a step from there to the blankets, Diamond Tiara removed her boots, and draped her socks over them. She unbuckled her jeans, sliding them off and folding them neatly. The air felt chilly on her bare thighs, but she wasn’t going to wear those things to bed. They were filthy! Her jacket joined the pile of clothing beside her boots, leaving her with only an undershirt and panties. She hoped her outfit wouldn’t be too dirty to be salvaged. Those jeans were hand wash only. But, on second thought, they did match too closely with a color of her hair, and she was thinking of trying out some bolder colors. It was impossible to see any colors in the darkness of the room anyway, so she was limited to mere speculation at the moment. Shivering in the cool evening air, Diamond Tiara quickly crawled under the blankets, wrapping them around her like a cocoon. Laying her head against the pillow, and already missing her evening shower, and already missing brushing her teeth, Diamond Tiara wondered how on earth she got into a mess like this. It wasn’t her fault that demons were attacking, and people were turning into horses! But maybe she could have handled it a bit better. Seemed like a good idea at the time, but it just wasn’t something she could imagine a real girl, with a real family would ever do. Apple Bloom had shown her that much was true, at least. And now Diamond Tiara couldn’t even sleep! Her back was awkwardly arched and her bottom was getting sore, so she turned on her side, but that just pushed the bony part of her hip into the floorboards. She laid on her back again, then sat up dissatisfiedly. She looked at the bed. Before you knew it, Diamond was right over by the bed, just barely peering over its edge. With her eyes adjusting to the darkness, she could see the sleeping form of Apple Bloom laying there dimly in the cool moonlight, a tiny lump under the sheets. Apple Bloom looked so small on that great big bed. It was way too big of a bed for just one little pony. Diamond pondered deeply whether she might have a solution for this terrible tragedy. “I’m going to regret this,” she muttered under her breath. Inhaling, she quickly ducked under the covers, and then with a silly, self indulgent smile, Diamond Tiara carefully crept up onto the bed. Whether it was Apple Bloom’s somnolence, or Diamond’s carefully honed skill of getting into the bed without disturbing the covers, Diamond sank into that nice bed again, with nothing more than a slight creak of bedsprings, and nobody or... nopony awoke. Diamond Tiara was shocked to discover the amazing fact that a bed was softer to lay on than the floor. After all, it’s not like she hadn’t already known how wonderfully soft Apple Bloom’s bed was, from laying on it just a half hour ago, so it came as a total surprise of course. Totally. And her hypothesis was entirely correct. There was plenty of room for both of them to sleep on it. In fact, it wasn’t even a twin bed. It was a queen or a... whatever those big beds are called with space for two pillows, and two whole girls, and certainly space for one girl and one little pony girl. So Diamond Tiara settled off to sleep again, with a pleasantly full belly, and the luxurious feeling of resting one’s aching limbs in a soft bed. It was probably the best bed she’d ever laid in. It sure was softer than the stiff mattress back at the orphanage. It didn’t smell smoky either, like her bed did from the one time her roommates tried to set it on fire to prank her. They acted like it was her fault they were so mean to her, but really she was just getting them back for what they were doing. It’s not like they didn’t deserve to be torn down emotionally, since they did it to her. At least, Diamond Tiara was pretty sure that’s how that worked. She dreamed that night, as usual, of her parents. Diamond couldn’t blame them for whatever ended her up in the orphanage. Something must have happened to them; she knew they wouldn’t just abandon her. What little she could remember was in the dream, of running and fear, and her father with such a worried look on his face. And then he was gone, like all the rest of them. She dreamed of her mother too, well, at least what her mother had felt like. Diamond couldn’t even remember what her mother’s face looked like anymore. It wasn’t a sad dream she had. It ended with them both hugging her and sitting on either side of her, and... fireworks or something. It was all very indistinct, but it was a very tender and loving experience. So Diamond was always puzzled why she woke up from these dreams with tears on her face. She did wake up though, very early in the morning after not sleeping long, probably because of her earlier nap. When Diamond Tiara slid her eyes open, the world outside the open curtains to Apple Bloom’s window was still pitch black. There were some birds chirping outside despite the darkness, making quite a racket for such little things, but beyond that not a sound to be heard. Diamond found herself puzzled by the feel of a soft warm weight on her belly, and of her hand resting on something even more terribly soft. Diamond then remembered was not alone in this bed. She lifted the covers with her free hand, blushing hotly at what she saw. Diamond Tiara wasn’t really a touchy feely sort of person. She didn’t mean to grab Apple Bloom that one time when she was crying. It just sort of happened. Apple Bloom just looked too much like a teddy bear to not go for it, when one was desperate for some comfort. Diamond had been surprised then, though probably shouldn’t have been, that instead of lemon yellow skin, Apple Bloom had a short and very dense coat of lemon yellow fur all over her body. But once she got over her surprise, Diamond just couldn’t help but enjoy the feel of it, stroking the part of Apple Bloom not wrapped up in that dress, until she’d passed out from exhaustion. And, she didn’t mean to do this either. Either her or the little pony girl had unconsciously made their way over to each other, some time along the course of this past night, and Apple Bloom was now half lying across Diamond Tiara’s bare midriff in the crook of Diamond’s arm, with Diamond’s own hand laying agaisnt Apple Bloom’s dress, to cradle around her friend’s furry horse body. That’s what Diamond Tiara woke up to. Her first thought was how velvety soft Apple Bloom felt. It did remind Diamond of a teddy bear, of her old teddy bear, that she couldn’t sleep with anymore because her roommates were watching. Her second thought was how unlike a teddy bear Apple Bloom was. Apple Bloom was much firmer, yet with more give to her skin, and her body just radiated heat. The tips of her hooves were rough where they lay against Diamond’s belly, but everything else was so soft and warm. Her midsection regularly rose and fell with the rhythm of her slow breathing. Diamond’s third thought was how much trouble she would get in, if Apple Bloom woke up while they were together like this. In the end, the sheer humiliation of ruining her image was what made Diamond squirm out of bed like an earthworm. She was too hasty though, and if Apple Bloom wasn’t well rested before, she sure was now, so as soon as Diamond Tiara landed on her butt on the floor with a very dignified squeak, she heard Apple Bloom coming awake in response. “Diamond Tiara whassa...” Apple Bloom slurred sleepily, peering over the edge of the mattress. “Were you in mah bed?” she asked confusedly. “There was– crates I mean, there were the guest room um,” Diamond stood up, fishmouthing intelligently. She must have looked totally ridiculous. She didn’t even have her clothes on. They were all folded by her shoes, and all she had to her name right now was a white undershirt and a plain looking pair of white underwear. As a fashionist, Diamond Tiara was rather new to the trade, so she had enough trouble getting decent looking outerwear to even think about the unthinkable situation of needing an attractive pair of panties to show off to anyone. Well, at least it was dark, so neither of them could see anything. Diamond’s reputation was preserved! Meh, whatever. “You know, it’s okay if you were,” Apple Bloom said, with a soft tender overtone to her voice that surprised and flustered Diamond. “Oh please, gag me with a spoon,” she said, blushing and cringing away, feeling a bit shameful about being so exposed like this, despite the darkness of the room. “Ah’m just saying,” Apple Bloom insisted, “This ain’t gonna be between any other than just the two of us.” That actually made a sigh of relief escape Diamond’s tense form. “That would like, um...” She didn’t know what to say, so she just started picking up her outerwear. They felt as dusty and filthy as when she took it off last night, obviously. She shook out her pants experimentally, wincing at the dust. She shouldn’t do that inside. “Ugh,” Apple Bloom said groggily, landing on the floor with a clop, and trodding out from behind the other side of the bed. “Ah slept in mah dress,” she croaked, “Now it’s even worse.” Her silouette travelled smoothly toward the wall, where she reared up on it like a cat on a scratching post, stretching upward until Diamond could tell what Apple Bloom was doing. The overhead light flicked on. Diamond immediately blushed and held her pants close against her, blocking the view of her almost bare hips. She didn’t think it would ever be a problem not having any fancy panties, yet now that she had her underclothes in plain sight, Diamond was surprised by how humiliating it was to have nothing to reveal, besides just plain white blah. It was super obvious too, because of how it clashed glaringly with her bright pink skin. Apple Bloom didn’t even seem to notice though, if she cared. The little oddly colored pony was looking positively wilted, with her hair lying loose, and her untied bow dangling loosely from one hoof. Her other three hooves hobbled along away from the wall in a limping gait. That filthy dress of hers was plastered against her sweaty hindquarters. Diamond looked down at her own very dirty pants and jacket, and then back at Apple Bloom, and then looked at the dark night outside Apple Bloom’s window. This was a terrible idea. A terrible awful naughty idea. She’d be a laughing stock if she was ever found out. Diamond Tiara wanted to giggle like a grade schooler. She pulled her pants away from covering her groin, deliberately holding her clothing from covering her. She balled up her fists on her hips and said chidingly to the pony, “Apple Bloom, you need to wash that smelly old dress right away.” “I cain’t,” Apple Bloom whined, somewhere between puzzlement and irritation. She hadn’t even noticed yet! “Ah told you it’s the only clothes ah got.” “So?” Diamond said snidely, “Just take it off to wash it! You don’t need it anyway.” “Well I just,” Apple Bloom kicked her hoof along the ground with an adorable pout, “Ah don’t wanna be indecent or nothin’” “I need to wash my clothes,” Diamond pointed out, casually holding up the dirty pants in her fist, “And they’re the only clothes I have, so... what’s the problem?” She smiled cheekily as Apple Bloom’s puzzlement turned to realization, and then a full on blush right beneath that fur on her face, when Apple Bloom realized she was looking at Diamond Tiara in her underwear. “C’mon,” Diamond said crossing her arms boldly. “If I can do it, then you can. It’ll be fine! Your fur pretty much covers everything anyway.” “It really don’t,” Apple Bloom muttered quietly, her tail going down. She looked aside discomfitedly. Wait, did she just imply... no, no Diamond was not going to entertain that thought. They were both girls, so it was okay. She was pretty sure that’s how it worked at least. “Look,” Diamond said a bit angrily, fingering her waistband. “Do I have to take off my underwear too? Because I totally will!” “No! No, you just– hold on one—!” Apple Bloom stammered, and frantically got out of her dress... somehow. It was an odd way to do it, that Diamond doubted a real horse would be able to accomplish. Apple Bloom slipped her stubby little front hooves into the body of her dress far too easily for a horse, and used them to push it up alongside her face, until her head popped in through the neck of the dress. Bloom tried to walk out of it backwards then, and tripped as it followed her. Finally she twisted about lithely to reach the base of her own tail, where Apple Bloom undid the cinch with her... teeth, allowing the dress to slip free from where it was fastened on her tail. Yeah, it was very odd. “There, see? That wasn’t so hard,” Diamond encouraged, as Apple Bloom stood there completely naked, gazing up at Diamond nervously. Diamond’s friend was down on all fours with ease, without a dress or a bow, looking just like a cute little pony, but also looking like her friend Apple Bloom. It was surreal, to say the least. “Ah guess it’s... kinda fun...” Apple Bloom said, unable to stop a shy smile from flitting across her so very expressive face. Diamond smiled back saying quietly, “Hey I won’t tell if you don’t.” Apple Bloom smiled genuinely at that, clearly picking up on Diamond’s enthusiasm. “Now let’s get these washed,” Diamond continued, picking up Apple Bloom’s ...dress. Good grief this thing had seen better days when it was drapery! It held a stronger smell of horse than the rest of the room, what was no doubt what Apple Bloom really smelled like now. The smell wasn’t so bad actually, but Diamond still said “Pyew! Where’s your laundry room already?” “Laundry room?” Apple Bloom asked confusedly. That made Diamond a bit uneasy. “You know, where like... your washing machine is?” she ventured. Apple Bloom laughed at that, “Oh we just get a wash basin outside and scrub it out a bit,” she said easily. Diamond Tiara had... never even seen a wash basin before outside of a children’s book. She had the feeling that this was indeed a terrible idea. “Okay,” Diamond said crouching down excitedly, ignoring that nagging little voice in her head, “Let’s do it!” The quiet of the early morning, before even the sky began to grey, was broken by a pair of giggles as two very different girls rolled a large wooden tub out from the back of the farm house. The pony one proceeded to gallop off, returning with a length of hose in her mouth. The human one put some amount of soap flakes in the tub and took the hose, while the pony ran back and turned it on. One of the girls was in nothing but her underwear, carrying her clothes out from the house in a bundle, and the other was in nothing at all, her only clothing a slip of dirty white fabric that she carried by pinching it in her teeth, and draping it over her backside. Once the tub was full, the two of them both started scrubbing on old fashioned, but made to last washboards. It wasn’t the mechanized way to do things, but they were a ways from the city, far from any laundromat, and electricity was unreliable this far out. And washing machines used a hell of a lot of electricity. So, by the light of an electric porch light, they scrubbed their clothes by hand and hoof, in a soapy wash basin that wouldn’t have looked out of place a hundred years ago. Diamond found it surprisingly enjoyable though. The act of scrubbing the clothes this way was a lot more satisfying than just staring at a machine in a laundromat, in a way that she didn’t really understand. Apple Bloom had no problems, certainly. Apple Bloom’s pony hooves were quite good at pushing cloth up and down on a ridged board, scrubbing it clean, even if Apple Bloom did have to climb onto the washboard entirely to reach properly. It was fun to watch her, what you could see of the pony in the porch light. They kept at it until Diamond Tiara’s teeth were chattering, and she was shaking from shivers. The coldest hour of an early fall morning was probably not the best time to be outside in your skivvies. It was Apple Bloom who stopped things, looking at Diamond with concern and speaking up, saying in her little pony voice, “Diamond, you’re shivering!” “I-I’m ok-kay,” Diamond insisted unconvincingly. “M-my arms a-are all w-w-wet an-nd i-it’s like f-f-ive s-so” “Why don’t you come inside, and ah’ll get you a blanket!” Apple Bloom said starting to run for the house. “W-wait!” Diamond shouted, making Apple Bloom pause on three hooves, looking back. “A-aren’t y-y-you c-cold?!” she stuttered out exasperatedly. “Ah got fur!” Apple Bloom declared with a quiet stomp, “Now come on, before y’catch your death!” Diamond meekly followed the little pony inside, whereupon Apple Bloom pulled one of the blankets off the chair. An odd twist of Apple Bloom’s neck made it flare out dramatically and drap right over Diamond Tiara’s shoulders. She didn’t want to admit it, but she was really grateful for that blanket right now. It was thick and scratchy, like wool. It was probably wool. While Diamond slowly chattered herself to warmth again, Apple Bloom ran back outside, to do something to finalize their clothes washing experiment, Diamond Tiara hobbled back outside once she’d warmed up, wrapped head to toe in that wool blanket. , The grass was still cold and wet on her unprotected feet. She found Apple Bloom trying to wring out her own dress, a feat difficult for one pony alone. So they did it together. Diamond held it, while Apple Bloom twisted, until a ton of water had wrung out of it. Then Apple Bloom threw it over what looked to be a clothesline hanging between the house, and a pole attached to their fence. The daylight was slowly increasing outside, but it was still really hard to see things. They repeated the process with Diamond’s clothes, though she winced at the state of her jeans and suspected that they might not be usable after this, despite being about as hand washed as they come. Then they both went inside, and Apple Bloom went and started stacking logs in the fireplace from a cradle full of chopped wood they had next to it, with her mouth! She showed Diamond where to stick the crumpled up newspaper so that it would feed the flames, and she checked the flue herself by biting on the handle and cranking it until she was sure it was open. Diamond got to use the electric starter, but she got the impression Apple Bloom could have done that part too. It was honestly really impressive. It didn’t even look like Apple Bloom realized just how good she was at doing stuff as a pony. She didn’t even have opposable thumbs! Or fingers! But here she was teaching Diamond Tiara how to light a fire in a fireplace. It would have been a lie to say Diamond was so naive that she had never even seen a fireplace before, but she certainly had never been allowed to light one, or use fire of any sort for that matter. It was... an exhilirating experience, for such a simple act of lighting it. Soon they were both sitting in front of the fire, Diamond more grateful for it than Apple Bloom, warming her numb hands in its cheery radiance. Apple Bloom just yawned cutely, and curled onto her side on the floor sort of like a cat, putting her back to be warmed by the fire and laying her head down on her hooves. Diamond just... couldn’t stand it. She reached down and stroked along that lemon yellow pony’s back. Apple Bloom was so soft. “What’re ya doing?” Apple Bloom grumped irritably, sticking her head up when Diamond’s hand came down upon her flank. Diamond startled and pulled back, but then she just explained, “Your fur is way too short to keep you warm, see?” And Apple Bloom totally bought it, pushing a hoof along the fur on her own hindquarters experimentally. She never even suspected Diamond actually enjoyed this. The perfect crime. “Guess you’re right,” Apple Bloom said uncertainly. The two didn’t sit by the fire long before Apple Bloom pushed her head insistently underneath Diamond Tiara’s palm, and Diamond found herself stroking her friend again without even thinking about it. Diamond blushed heavily but... well, Apple Bloom wasn’t exactly asking her to stop. So that’s what she did for a while. “Ah should get cold like this,” Apple Bloom said regarding her naked body, staring forward in contemplation. “Ah ain’t even got enough fur to fluff up much, except maybe on mah chest. It feels like a fur coat on the inside?” “Your skin’s thicker,” came Applejack’s voice from beyond the firelight. Both girls looked back to see Applejack walk over to the two of them, still in her nightgown, holding a portable lamp for walking in the dark. Diamond pulled her hand away from Apple Bloom guiltily, but Applejack didn’t seem paying attention to her at all, saying evenly to Apple Bloom, “Fur’s only good for insulation so much, and when it gets wet, well...” She sat down by the fire beside the two of them, saying, “You’ll be glad for a nice layer of blubber when that happens.” “So ah’m fat?” Apple Bloom whined in outrage, once again totally misinterpreting everything Applejack said, in a way that made being a pony look bad. She was such a blockhead sometimes. “What about the ponies in the corral?” Diamond said to Apple Bloom teasingly, “They don’t mind the cold. Are they fat?” “Those are horses!” Apple Bloom protested hotly. That actually made Diamond Tiara pause. “...what’s the difference?” she asked uncertainly. Apple Bloom hmphed, crossing her front hooves as if they were arms... sort of. “Ah’m not the same as them,” she insisted, “So ah gotta call it something.” “Weren’t you more friendly toward the term space pony?” Applejack said sitting down on Apple Bloom’s other side, nudging with an elbow her sister, in her sister’s teeny little shoulder. Apple Bloom nodded, then her eyes widened and she jumped to her hooves between them, in startlement. “Oh right, the space ponies! Crayons!” she shouted, then trotted off without another word, leaving Diamond Tiara looking at Applejack questioningly. Apple Bloom was only gone a few seconds though, so before Applejack could explain, Bloom came trotting back, looking pleased as punch, with that box of crayons securely held in her mouth. Diamond couldn’t even laugh with how completely appropriate that looked. And adorable. So unbearably, cheerfully adorable. Dropping the crayons in Diamond Tiara’s blanket shrouded lap, Apple Bloom also pulled out a sheet of paper from ...somewhere... laid it in front of Diamond, and said smiling brightly, “Alright! So you’re real confused-like, so here’s the idea. Instead of tryin’ to tell us about what’s real or what’s not, and gettin’ all confused, why don’t you just draw what you saw? Dreamed? Whatever it is.” Diamond would have answered, but she was busy trying to control her dark impulses. Apple Bloom’s bright smile of triumph dimmed a little. Her ears went down, and she backed up a bit, kicking a hoof on the ground saying, “Ah was gonna ask ya to do it last night, but ah sorta ...fell asleep.” “Apple Bloom, please,” Diamond Tiara begged tensely, “You’re killing me.” “What?!” Apple Bloom said in a hurt and worried tone, looking up at Diamond with big scared eyes. “I am trying so hard to not just hug you right now,” Diamond accused frustratedly. “Stop being so adorable!” “...” Applejack defused the tension by grabbing Apple Bloom around the midsection from behind, hauling her up in the air, and squeezing the struggling little pony so tightly Diamond could swear she made a sound like a squeak toy. “Aw, it’s alright,” Applejack said in a friendly tone, still pulling Apple Bloom into her lap, and mussing with her hair, “Apple Bloom knows full well the effect she has on us, an’ don’t let her fool you.” “Ah wasn’t—tryin– ta–” Apple Bloom said, wiggling frustratedly. “Now listen here Apple Bloom,” Applejack said in a serious tone causing the pony to immediately still. “You gotta treat your friends right, and there is nothing wrong with wanting a hug. She put Apple Bloom, down and gave her hindquarters a little boost in Diamond’s direction. Apple Bloom grumbled behind herself to Applejack with a defiant pout, “Ah wasn’t gonna say she couldn’t hug me. Ah’m just not used to all this.” “Well I don’t have to,” Diamond offered, downcast. “You don’t make it like, easy though.” “It’s fine,” Apple Bloom groaned resignedly. “Ah would hug me too if ah was still human. Ah ain’t an animal, but ah ain’t the same as ah was. So there’s nothing wrong with... y’know...” She seemed uncertain of herself, and then just leaned forward and nuzzled Diamond Tiara’s right thigh with the side of her face, just a teeny little bit. The fire alarm that woke the rest of the Apple Family was actually the squealing of a young girl downstairs, glomming passionately onto the cutest most adorable little pony creature friend of hers to ever have existed ever who currently appeared to be having problems breathing. Every high school student has to wake up long before the sun rises. Between the time it takes to get ready, and school starting at a half hour after 7am if you’re lucky plus commute times... well, the Apple family had one of the longest commutes. So they had to be out of the house by 6:30. It was a tired routine they’d gotten lost in. A routine Apple Bloom had started to look at with more and more disdain, the longer she spent time away from school. Because with one of her siblings taking care of her, Apple Bloom and (well it was Applejack today) they had enough time and freedom to actually make a decent breakfast. Pancakes, french toast, bacon, sausage, fresh sliced apples (go figure), there were so many delicious breakfast items that just couldn’t be prepared because of the rigors of high school. As Apple Bloom drizzled tons of syrup on her lonely pancake, whose batter she stirred, she recalled the early mornings before this started, her desperation to eat whatever you could cold and quick so she could hurry to the place that filled her with dread, because you could sleep just a little bit longer if you rushed breakfast that way. There was something terrible about treating breakfast like that, and it was a huge relief to be able to take some time and care, to make something fancy. Apple Bloom couldn’t help but giggle at the sight of a, now a bit rumpled, but dressed Diamond Tiara, who didn’t even seem to know what to do with the food in front of her. She probably had like, a packaged breakfast or something at that orphanage. Or worse, was it like a cafeteria at the orphanage? Was every one of Diamond’s meals cafeteria food? At any rate, she clearly wasn’t used to fancy down home cooking, but once she got started she took to it with a passion. Diamond Tiara did a lot of things with a passion. Drawing, for instance. As Apple Bloom headed toward the hay bale to top off her breakfast, she paced past the crayon drawing Diamond Tiara had made. It was exactly what Diamond talked about, with a weird demon girl all floating up there, and facing her off was Applejack and five others, also floating in the air. Well, probably floating. Diamond hadn’t drawn any ground or anything. Just those characters, and oddly that horse statue out in the front expanse you passed on your way to school. And like, little baby demons with shit eating grins on their faces. Applejack had so many best friends: Apple Bloom really admired her for it. Apple Bloom herself had Sweetie, Scootaloo and Diamond, but she admired Applejack’s friends too, all of whom were participating here in this magic horse defense thingy. There was Rarity, who Apple Bloom knew really well through Sweetie Belle, and there was Rainbow Dash, whom Apple Bloom knew really well through the daily reports on her awesome feats by Scootaloo, and also that one time she helped at their bake sale. There was that ecologist, the animal shelter girl that Applejack said was so shy, and that rocker who also helped bake at the bake sale and... Apple Bloom squinted at the drawing, then picked it up in her mouth and turned around, trotting over to the breakfast table. Relatively unnoticed by the others down on the floor here, Apple Bloom wiggled her hindquarters and jumped right over the back of her chair, landing neatly on the strapped down (that had been an entertaining lesson to learn last week) booster seat. That caught everyone’s interest. Spitting the paper out on the table, arranging so that it slid right up to Applejack, Apple Bloom said, “These are all your friends, right?” Applejack put down her fork and nodded. “That’s right. Just like I said before.” “Well ah recognize Rainbow Dash,” Apple Bloom listed off, “And Rarity, and uh, Pinkie Pie and uh... the animal shelter girl...” “Fluttershy,” Applejack prompted. “Fluttershy, right,” Apple Bloom said gratefully. “And here you are, and... you all got like, horse ears and tails and you’re fightin’ the demons.” “You make it sound so ridiculous!” Diamond protested shrilly, throwing down her fork. “I’m telling you I just drew what I saw! I didn’t believe it either!” “That’s not what ah’m concerned about,” Apple Bloom said, shooting Diamond an irritable glare. “Well, what’s the big deal then?” Applejack asked, picking up her fork and taking another big bite. “Ah thold you, ah don’t remember anythin’ like that happenin’ before,” she said around a mouthful. Apple Bloom frowned at Applejack, then tapped the center of the drawing, saying, “Who’s the purple girl here? Right in the middle there. Is she one of your friends too?” “Yeah she—” Applejack ...halted. She’d been doing that a lot, lately. Applejack finished her mouthful, and put down the fork, leaning to look closer at the drawing again. “She’s uh...” Applejack said uncertainly, “I don’t rightly know, but she looks familiar for some reason.” She looked over at Diamond, asking “Who is she, Diamond Tiara?” “Uh, me?” Diamond said abrasively, not wanting to be put on the spot by far. “I don’t know her. I’m just drawing what I saw. You don’t know a purple girl?” “Ah suppose it could be... Ms. Cheerilee?” Applejack puzzled at the drawing. She glanced at Diamond, saying “You know there’s a shade of magenta in the crayon box, right?” “It wasn’t Ms. Cheerilee,” Diamond said uncomfortably. “It was just a girl, in your class I think, I mean, I don’t know. It just happened.” “She really is this shade of purple,” Diamond said, pointing at the purpled one, “Not magenta. She also had straight hair, but... oh! Magenta!” While the others watched confusedly, Diamond scooted away from the breakfast table and jogged over to grab the box of crayons, running back with two colors, that she then drew, one line after another in the middle of the girl’s hair. “She had like these really cool highlights,” Diamond explained, “Like a violet and a magenta stripe in her hair.”