I stood with my back against a wall in Luna’s chamber with a disgruntled look. “What is it now?” I mumbled. I knew that I was still in Luna’s body, yet in this particular instance I wasn’t. Matter of fact, I was still dreaming. When the previous dream had collapsed another had formed in its place, piece by piece, it was almost like a puzzle had assembled itself before me.
The deadlock on Luna’s door came loose and to my right it swung open. I raised an eyebrow and watched as another grey hued Luna strolled into the room. She appeared agitated. Luna’s horn flashed and the door behind her slammed shut, from there she blew past me and went over to a large desk. There she threw open the bottom drawer and with her magic, fished out a black bound book. Which she placed gently on top of her desk. Luna then pulled over a plush chair and sat down. She levitated a quill and ink pot beside the book and dipped the feather into the pot and began to write furiously in the book.
I pushed myself off the wall, my face puzzled. Luna was breathing heavily and she seemed very upset about something. I went over to investigate. I wanted to ask her what was wrong, though I knew it wouldn’t be worth it. I had to remind myself that this was only one of Luna’s many memories. I stopped behind her and looked over to see her face. She looked as if she was about to cry.
Confused I peered over her shoulder and down at the black book she was writing in. The words were blurry and I was unable to get a clear picture on what she was writing. Though it seemed as if she was writing in some sort of journal, a diary perhaps? I thought to myself, maybe this book of hers holds clues on to how I got here.
“Perhaps,” I said out loud.
I turned my head back at the sound of three loud knocks coming from the ornate hardwood door. Luna sniffed and shook her head. “Luna.” I could hear Celestia’s muffled voice coming from behind the door. The knob began to turn and the door clicked when it opened. “Luna, I know you’re in here–”
“J-just leave me alone!”
Celestia stepped into the room. “Luna please, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you like that, I was just afraid that was all.”
“You’re afraid?!”
I was standing in front of Celestia when she walked right through me. Like with Luna Celestia’s body exploded into ash, only to reform into its original state behind me. I stumbled backwards startled once again by this bizarre experience. “I’m never going to get use to that,” I said as I ran a hand through my hair.
“Luna please, I told you not to bother me when I’m working,” Celestia said quietly as she slowly approached her sister. Luna quickly closed her book and shoved it into the desk’s lower drawer before Celestia could see it. “What was that?”
“Tis nothing.” Luna wheeled herself around and locked gazes with her sister. “Sis, what you were doing was not work.”
“Luna, you do not need to hide anything from me,” Celestia said completely disregarding her sister’s statement.
“What the hell are they talking about?” My eyes shifted between the two of them, when I looked to Celestia I could see the faintest look of worry. “What are you hiding, Celestia?”
“I’m not hiding anything. ” Luna sighed, “You're the one who’s hiding something.” She stood up from her chair. “How about we go for some tea and discuss such matters later?”
Celestia shook her head. “I think discussing this right here is just fine little sister. What was that book you just put away?”
Luna scowled. “I said it was nothing,” She said in a low sharp voice.
Celestia looked around the room, most likely seeing if anyone may have been listening in on them. Her horn suddenly flashed and I could see a faint grey aura form around the door and windows. “Please Luna, if word gets out about what I was doing down there...” She fell silent. “Things will not go well for either of us.”
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing here, could they be talking about me? Or something else? Whatever this is, it’s a secret they’re keeping from their kingdom. A terrible secret judging by what Celestia had said.
“Celestia.” Luna’s voice was stern and Celestia winced at the sound of her sister using her full name. “What you’re doing is dreadful! Drop this project instantly and move on! It is cruel and absolutely unusual!”
“No, Luna.” Celestia looked away as if out of shame. Luna appeared shocked by what she had heard, however, before could reply Celestia continued, “I have gone too far and learned so much. I cannot back down now. The strength and similarities we bare is spectacular.”
“Celestia, that is because you–”
Knock knock knock!
I frowned and looked around the room. “The hell was that?” It sounded like someone was knocking at the door.
“What do you mean I’m acting like a mother?” My attention was brought back towards the two apparitions arguing in front of me.
“You know full well sister, you have become obsessed with your work! I’ve read your notes, you’re babying it! Treating it as if it was your very own foal!”
“I am not!” Celestia shouted.
“Yet you are!” Luna retorted, her face was overwhelmed with anger. "I have said this once, and I’ll say it again. Stop what you’re doing now!”
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
There it goes again.
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
“Can someone fucking get that?”
“That is it!” Luna screamed, and with that scream came a loud echo along with a gust of wind. “I have had enough of your nonsense! Leave. Here. Now!”
I ducked and covered my ears, looking back I saw Luna’s eyes were nearly white. She was glaring at Celestia with such ferocity even the elder sister cowered a bit, she then straightened herself out and nodded. “Very well then, little sister.” Celestia’s ears fell flat and her voice was merely a whisper. “I’ll do as you wish.”
“Wait, what the fuck is happening?!” I stood up and went over to Celestia. “Did I miss something?” I really had no idea what was going on. Because of that goddamn knocking noise I had missed half the conversation–
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
I glared at the ceiling. “Would you knock that shit off!” Seriously, I missed half the sho–er, memory because of this shit and possibly the reason on why I’m here. I looked towards the door and saw Celestia walking out of the room. “Oh now we’re you going,” I said started towards the door after her “Where the fuck are you going?!” I shouted even though she couldn’t hear me, “Where the fuck are you going?!” She was out the door now. “What the fuck are you hiding from me?!”
The second Celestia’s magic swung the door shut a blinding flash of light engulfed the room. When my vision slowly returned, I was back in Luna’s bed. My eyes gazing up at her ceiling, her dark, oakwood ceiling. I started blinking my eyes, trying to rid myself of the fuzziness that still infested them. I gulped and raised my head and gazed down at myself. “Yep,” I sighed in Luna’s voice, “Still not human... nor a man for that matter–” I winced at a sudden stinging headache. “Gah–... fuck...” I whined, if I hadn’t been going through any pain when I heard that sound I had just made. I’d find it rather cute. Though, in a situation such as shoveling my way through a hangover, not so much.
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
“Graaahah–oww...” I cupped my hooves over my ears and rolled over in bed.
“Open the door, Lee!” I heard my real voice shout from behind the door. “Open up!”
“Luna... I. Am. NOT–ow–in the mood right now!” The stinging pain caused by each knock of the door brought me closer to tears.
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
“I am not leaving for art thou has some explaining to do!” She continued to pound on her bedroom door.
I shoved my head deep into one of Luna’s many pillows and whined quietly, “Oh for fuck sake, please kill me.” I knew exactly why she was here, and what she was about to do to me. Well at least I thought I knew what she was going to do to me, and that being chewed out for making a fool of herself. However, now that I think about it: much far worse things are starting to come to mind.
KNOCK! KNOCK–
“Alright, fuck!” I half shouted because of my aching migraine. “I’m getting up, just please...” I choked, “Just stop banging on the door!” I crawled my way off the bed, and as best I could stepped off with my right foreleg.
Slowly I took each leg off one at a time, trying to find balance with each one. Once I had accomplished being able to stand I slowly, and as best I could, walked my way over to the door. Upon stopping behind it, I had found that I was now introduced to a new obstacle.
Doorknobs.
Oh Sweet Jesus the number one killer of creatures without opposable thumbs. Actually, looking at it now: why are there even doors with knobs in the first place?! Like, I understand for unicorns and what not, but... what about the winged ponies and the non special ones. How do they get past these unscalable structures?
“Umm, Lee?” I heard Luna ask behind the door, “You can open the door now.”
“Uh... Yeah about that.” I gazed down at my hooves wishing I really had hands right now. “We may have ran into a problem.”
“And what would that be?” She asked, the irritation in her voice being rather clear.
“How do I open doors?”
All of a sudden I heard a thump against the door, presumably her head. Luna let off an exasperated sigh. “Oh sweet mother let me kill him when this is over,” She mumbled before taking a deep breath. “Lee, what do you mean you don’t know how to open the door?”
I raised an eyebrow and glared at the closed door. “What part of that sentence did you not understand?” I asked, “I don’t have hands, therefore how do I open a door?”
“With magic you dimwit! Use my magic to open the door!”
“How do I magic then?!”
“Arrgh!” Luna cried out and I heard her head thump against the door again. “Lee, we went over this earlier. Just... for pete's sake even a foal can do this. Focus all of your attention on the knob, and imagine it turning. If your concentration is good enough you should hear it start to move, once it clicks just pull it open and then we can discuss the issues that had risen.”
“Alright then, I’ll give it a shot.” I closed my eyes and focused all my attention on the knob, doing as she said I imagined the doorknob turning on its own. I replayed this image a few times in my head, after the fourth time I began to feel a sudden warmth sprout around my forehead. Opening my eyes I noticed a blue aura around the knob and it began to turn. “H-hey Luna, I’m doing it! It’s–” about a quarter of an inch the knob stopped. “Wha...?” I jiggled the knob but it wouldn’t open. “Luna, the knob isn’t moving? Why isn’t it– ”
“Because it’s locked, you idiot! Oh dear mother has drinking made you this stupid?!”
I felt a jab of anger in my chest and my eyebrows furrowed, however I restrained myself from saying anything. Luna had a right to be angry, what I had done wasn’t right, I should give her that at least. I took a deep breath and used her magic to undo the lock, finally after a few wasted minutes I finally opened the door. Luna stood in front of me and for a mere second I felt as if I was looking at myself in the reflection. Luna still had not gotten fully clothed, but thankfully she wasn’t walking around in my body completely naked.
She wasn’t wearing a shirt, however she was wearing my dress pants and the enchanted medallion in order to stay undercover. Looking at myself from an outsiders perspective was rather odd I would admit, because you begin to notice things that you wouldn’t normally see. For instance: I looked as if I hadn’t shaved in nearly a week; patches of dark brown fuzz had sprouted all along my jawline and cheeks. The same went for my hair, boy did I need a haircut; already it had began to go past the tips of my ears. The most annoying thing of all though was that I could see a few grey hairs mingling with the brown along the back of my head when Luna walked past me.
It was funny seeing her walk. I could tell she wasn’t use to having only two legs, it reminded a lot C-3PO and how he didn’t really bend his legs. “What?” Luna snapped at me and stopped in the center of the room.
I awkwardly turned to face her. “Oh nothing, just admiring the view that’s all,” I said literally looking myself over. “Also, hasn’t anyone mentioned yet that you walk like an old person?” Luna shot an aggravated look at me and rolled her eyes without saying anything. “Like seriously, how are you going to pull off my act if you’re walking around like some kind of–”
“I’m sorry,” Luna suddenly said, causing me to look at her confused. Why did she just apologize?
“What?” I asked, my mind still trying to decipher what she had said.
Luna began to approach me slowly. “I’m, so, so sorry for this.”
“What are you–” My voice was cut short by her knuckles making contact with the bottom of my chin, my head recoiled to the left and I had lost balance and fell into the nearby dresser.
“ARRGH!” I heard Luna cry out in pain. “Good, sweet–arrrgh!”
I laid on the floor, my eyes still wide in shock from what had just happen. I was surprised that not only did I just get punched, but I also felt no pain. Which was utterly bewildering because the force behind that haymaker had thrown me into the nearby dresser, did I really have that good of a left hook?
“Gaah!” The floor shook with Luna plopping her rear onto the floor. “This pain! How can you feeble ones deal with this feeling?!” I raised my head off the floor and glanced over at her, she was sitting on the floor with of her left hand jammed into her mouth, trying her best to numb the pain.
“Wh...why?” I mumbled out completely dumbstruck.
Luna grimaced and popped her hand out of her mouth. “What do you mean why, you imbecile?!” She got up, doing her best not to use her left hand to push her off the ground, she shot daggers at me. “How could you be so inconsiderate?!”
I steadily pushed myself back up onto my hooves, my conscience clearing back up. “Oh my God...” I sighed, thoughts of earlier today resurfacing.
“I told you not to go drinking!” Luna nearly screamed at me, “And look at have what you do done!”
“Bullshit!” I raised my voice back at her. Though she had a right to be angry, I still wasn’t going to go down without trying to defend myself. Seriously, I think a punch was enough. “You told me don’t go drinking too much!”
“Ugh!” Luna tossed her arms in the air and turned her back to me.
I continued to defend myself. “I only had one drink! One!”
Luna looked over her shoulder. “Really now?”
“Yes.” I nodded my head. “And it was very good.”
“What kind of drink was it?” Luna lowered her voice back down to its original volume.
“Wine, like you said they served,” I said, “Berry Grape wine.”
Luna raised an eyebrow. “Berry grape wine? Is that so?”
“Y-yeah, what’s wrong with that?”
“What’s wrong with that?” Luna repeated my question to herself, she dropped down onto her fours and reached under her bed. Seconds later she pulled out a small key. “Oh I’ll tell you what’s wrong with that: Remember that wine cabinet I told you I had?”
My mind drew a blank, however I continued to shake my head in a fake agreement. “Uh, yeah sure.”
Luna opened her closet and pushed away some of her various dresses, behind that was a cabinet. “Well it just so happens that ‘berry grape wine.’” She unlocked the cabinet and opened it, she reached in and pulled out a large purple bottle and flashed it towards me, “Is the highest degree of alcohol in Canterlot, and aside from the kitchen staff, I am the only pony in this castle who has access to it.”
So the pony who can hardly hold her drink, I thought, has some of the strongest shit in the castle. Okay, seems legit. “So where are you getting at?” I asked.
“Why did you drink it?” She asked easily pulling the cork out of the bottle.
I looked at her dumbly. “What do you mean, why did I drink it? I was thirsty!”
“That’s besides the point, Lee, you were in court!”
“And I was fucking thirsty!”
“Do NOT!” I jumped. “Use such vulgar language with me!”
I took a step back startled, and gulped. I closed my eyes and shook my head. “You know what Luna, fuck you.” I snarled.
“Excuse me?” She cocked her head at me.
“We had a deal,” I growled and took a step towards her.
“Indeed we did.” She hissed and took a swig from her bottle. “A deal in which you–”
“You know what, shut the fuck up!” I took another few steps towards her. “You want to know the truth?” I stopped a few inches from her she placed a hand on my chest and pushed me back. “Do you really want to know why I drank that wine.” Luna responded by narrowing her eyes with mine and leaning in closely. “I drank that wine because you and every other fucking thing in this god forbidden castle is driving me CRAZY!”
“That is besi–”
“And not only that!” Without thinking I had magically taken the wine bottle out of Luna’s grasp and took a large gulp from it while Luna watched in pure horror. “Gah–!” I pulled the bottle away from my lips and dropped it on the floor, spilling its contents onto the carpet. “It was mainly because of you–yeah, all because of you broke the deal too you hypocritical bitch!”
Luna’s back struck the open cabinet due to my blow. “I saw you flirting with those guards!” I continued, “The looks on their faces when you did that prissy little hand gesture!”
“Lee, what are you talking about?”
“I’m saying you're a goddamn traitor!”
An awkward silence hung in the air as we let things settle in. Luna brought a hand behind her head and scratched her neck while my eyes traveled towards the spilt drink which had stained the carpet a hideous purple. We both sighed deeply.
Luna started first, “I-I’m sorry, Lee–”
“No, no... I should be sorry.” I took another deep breath.
“I shouldn’t have hit you like that.”
“Yeah I really think that should’ve been it.”
“There was no possible way you would’ve have known that the drink was that strong.”
“No really, I fell like a sack of bricks. I’m surprised it didn’t bruise.”
“You done?”
“What?”
I looked at Luna with a raised eyebrow, she laughed out loud. “I guess I must’ve knocked your brain loose.” She patted me on the shoulder. “Now could you please step out of the way so that I can get out?” I looked over my shoulder, I hadn’t noticed that my entire body had cornered her in the closet.
“Oh, sorry,” I said doing my best to back up. “And I believe you mean, your brain.” Luna snorted.
When the two of us stepped out of the closet we sat back by her bed in complete silence, our backs facing one another. The spilt drink now gave the room a strange sense of berries; it wasn’t a bad smell, but it was rather strong. “So,” I said breaking the silence, “Have you found that spell book you mentioned earlier.”
I heard Luna gasp. “Oh my! I can’t believe I forgot!”
I groaned and fell onto the bed on my side. “Don’t tell me you didn’t get it...”
“No, no, I have it.” My heart immediately leapt with joy and I felt the bed level out when Luna got up. “I just don’t have it on me as of yet.”
I rose up and looked over at her. “Wait, does that mean we can swap bodies again?” My heart fluttered and I felt like an excited school girl going on her first date.
“Yes,” Luna said but before I could release a heartfelt cheer she raised a finger. “But there’s a quick catch.”
My heart stumbled and I nearly gagged. “Wh... what do you mean there’s a catch?”
“The ritual needs at least forty minutes of preparation and...” Luna gazed upwards at the nearby clock. “And dinner isn’t ready for another twenty.”
I stepped off the bed and faced her. “What if I help you set it up, then we can finish it in half the time and be home before supper.”
“Lee, it doesn’t work like that. When I said it takes at least forty minutes to prepare I meant it, even with help it’ll take the same amount of time.”
“How does that make any sense?”
“Lee, we’re talking magic here not your afternoon chores. It’s a really picky process and it’s better off doing it alone, it’s less dangerous that way.”
I rolled my eyes. “Fucking horses and your voodoo magic.”
Luna released a frustrated sigh. “Now, Lee there’s no reason to cock an attitude. Just go to dinner and just try your best to be me.”
“Now how am I supposed to do that? I made a fool of us remember?”
Luna cringed. “You mean, you made a fool of me remember?”
I lowered my head and apologized, “Alright, sorry, but that doesn’t change my point. What am I supposed to do?”
Luna bit her lower lip and brought a hand to her chin, she briefly turned away from me in thought. Almost a minute passed before she pounded her fist into her palm and faced me again. “I have a plan, I’m feeling stressed alright.”
“You’re the one feeling, what about me–”
“You get what I mean!” She barked, I snickered and looked over at the cabinet. She really has a lot of drinks in there for a pony who hardly takes it in, Luna continued on with explaining her plan,“Recently there’s been a lot of stress between my sister and I.”
“Yeah because of that fight you guys had right?” I asked, wondering how many different flavors of wine could be in there.
“Yes because we had... that... fight... how in Equestria do you..” She looked at me speechlessly.
My eyes met with hers. “What?” I raised an eyebrow, then it clicked. “Oh...” I mumbled, “I said something I wasn’t supposed to didn’t I?” Luna frowned and bit her lip and quickly turned away from me and walked over to her desk. The same desk that I recalled her black book being in, which was also the book I told myself I’d look into. “Wa-wait, where are you going?”
“I need to check something!” Luna snapped at me and knelt down in front of the desk, she reached down into the bottom drawer, pulled it open, and grabbed her book. She tossed it on top of the desk. When looking at the cover of the book, I noticed that it wasn’t black, but instead violet. Luna opened the book and flipped through a few pages, for nearly minutes I stood behind her waiting as she continued to read and skim over countless passages.
The silence was then broken by Luna wincing slightly and a hand shot to the side of her head. I took notice of this and shook myself from day dreaming. “Is something wrong?” I asked.
“N-no,” Luna replied and cringed. “Just a minor headache that is all. Been pushing through one all day.”
I sighed. “I know how you feel, ever since I got here I’ve been going through them in and out. Trust me it’ll pass.”
Luna nodded. “I suspect it will.” She tapped her finger on the page and growled. “Right here.” Her voice suddenly went cold.
“Right where?” I took a step forward but Luna slammed the book shut and turned towards me, making me jolt slightly. She raised the book up in the air so that my eyes were aligned with it.
“Do not jest with, Lee,” She said shaking the book, “I know you went through my diary.”
I recoiled back, I knew that’s what that was! “Whoa, okay...” I straightened myself out, prepping myself for defense. “No, Luna I did not read anything. Hell, I didn’t even know that was in there in the first place–”
“You’re lying!”
“No I’m not!”
Luna looked at me with pure disbelief. She lowered the book and began to approach me. “Then how do you know about that fight my sister and I had?”
“I dunno, lucky guess–”
Luna stopped just inches away from me. “Do not toy with me, Lee!”
“Why does it even matter?” That was the question that seemed to tip her over the edge.
Her face contorted. “Why does it matter?!” She twirled away from me and went over to her desk. She threw the book into the drawer and slammed it shut. “Why does it matter?!” She repeated. “Does it matter that my sister spent the last month locked away in the basement?!”
What the Hell is she rambling on about? I asked myself, Celestia locked herself in the basement?
“Does it matter that I’ve had to clean up after everything she has dropped just to watch over you!” Luna shouted and dropped herself onto the desk’s seat panting like a dog. “ I need a drink,” she mumbled and got up from the chair and went to the wine cabinet.
I stood there shocked. My mind now breaking past five thousand miles an hour. “Does it matter that I’ve had to clean up after everything she has dropped just to watch over you!” Luna’s words continued to play on repeat. I slowly turned to look at her, she was already downing a bottle of wine.
“Luna...” I could hardly piece my words together. I was still processing what have been said, watching over me? What does she mean Celestia’s been watching over me? Then I began to realize... my entire life. The white apparition; the anomaly I had seen in my neighbors yard before leaving home!
Jesus Christ, it was all starting to make sense! “Luna!” I demanded her attention, I pounded a hoof to the floor. She took her lips off the bottle and looked at me.
“Hwat?” I could tell the alcohol was getting to her.
I narrowed my vision and took a deep breath. “What do you mean Celestia has been watching me?” I asked, my tone opting to something more threatening than I attended for, “Just how long have I actually been here?”
She looked at me confused, than realization for what she had done. Luna quickly placed the bottle back into the cabinet and locked it. Next her eyes met with mine and she quickly brushed past me. “I think we wasted enough time here, Lee, I’ll get the spell prepped and–”
“Hey!” I barked stopping her in front of the bed, “Just where the hell do you think we’–”
“Do you want your body back or not?” She turned and gestured to herself.
I looked at her and frowned. “As of now I want answers.”
Luna’s eyebrows curled upwards and she bit her bottom lip, her eyes darted towards the door as if she contemplated gunning for it. She then sighed and lowered her head in defeat. “Lee, right now is not the time for this.”
I leaned into her and stared her in the eyes. “I think we have just enough time.”
Luna put a hand to my chest I pushed me off like before. “Right now we don’t.” She pointed to the clock. “We have less than ten minutes. The spell will take nearly three times as long to get ready, I’ll lead you down to dinner and divert from there.”
I snorted and rolled my eyes. I’m really getting tired of having my questions avoided. “Fine I’ll play along,” I said, a small part of me surprised by how hostile I sounded towards her. “What about you, or should I say me. If this dinner is happening because Celestia wants to introduce me to a few ‘friends’ of hers’ wouldn't it be suspicious for you to not show up?”
Luna closed her eyes and shook her head. “Yes, you are correct, Lee. But I’ve already thought about this and came up with a believable solution.”
I cocked an eyebrow. “And what’s that?”
“I got lost.”
My lips cascaded into a thin line and my eyebrows fell. “Huh... I guess you did think well on that.” I can see Celestia falling for something such as that. I’ve only been here for what? Two days?
“But the dinner isn’t just for you, Lee.” Luna pushed past me and went for the door, she motioned for me to follow. “Tonight is a very special night.”
“What do you mean?” The two of us finally stepped out into the hallway for what nearly seemed like an eternity has past since I first left her room.
She looked at me and smiled lightly. “Tonight is the night before Hearth's Warming Eve.”