The People's Republic of Twilightlicious

by GeodesicDragon


Corporations Demand Political Say

Twilight flinched as an egg struck the window she was peering out of, closing the blinds with a quick flash of her magic. Raymond watched her as she crossed the room and sat down at her desk, throwing her forehooves into the air with a loud sigh.

"Now that the Arms Manufacturing workers have got their pay rise, it seems that all the other unions have decided to go on strike!" she groaned. "All I saw when I looked out that window was a sea of banners from the various unions: Trout And About, The 'You' in 'Uranium,' and 'Cheese Be With You.'" She paused. "Seriously, who came up with those names?"

Raymond shrugged. "It doesn't matter, Your Highness," he replied. "In the meantime, there is another issue demanding your attention." He opened his folder and pulled out a sheet of paper. "A well-heeled lobby group is pushing for the elimination of regulations that prevent corporations from donating money to political parties."

"Very well." Twilight pointed at the door. "Send in the representatives, and I'll hear them out."

Raymond nodded and walked over to the door while Twilight made herself look more presentable. He opened it and two people – a man and a woman – walked in. They both bowed and then, at Twilight's direction, sat down on the chairs in front of her desk.

"Good Morning," Twilight said. "You have come to me today to lobby my opinion on the donation of money to political parties from corporations. Please, introduce yourselves and then present me with your arguments." She pointed at the man. "You first, sir."

The man nodded. "Thank you, Your Highness." he cleared his throat. "My name is Max Neumann, and I represent the Arms Manufacturing industry." Twilight opened her mouth to speak, but he raised a hand. "Don't worry, I'm not mad about you giving in to the unions — in fact, I was one of the few business owners who were ready to give their workers a pay rise. Anyway, if I may continue?" Twilight nodded. "Right. "This is supposed to be a democratic country, yet these archaic laws say I can't donate money to support a political party and they also put caps on the amount any party can spend on advertising. It's time to stop treating voters like children, and trust them to make up their own minds." He slammed his fist into his palm. "Free the ballot box!"

The woman next to him rolled her eyes and scoffed.

"First of all, Princess, my name is Elizabeth Sanchez, and I'm a popular anarchist," she said. "Now, in regards to what Max said... well, he says 'political freedom,' but to me that is pretty much the same as vote-buying." She sighed. "If these fat cats get their way, then politicians can easily buy their own seat in Congress. And let's face it, a slick advertising campaign can convince a lot of apathetic voters. We need to tighten the laws, not repeal them. Money should have no place in politics!"

She shot Max a glare as Twilight tapped her forehooves together, leaning forwards in her chair. "You both make convincing arguments," she said. "I will convene my advisors, and we will put it to a vote. You can expect to hear from me soon."

Max and Elizabeth both stood up, bowing once before leaving the room silently. Raymond stood by Twilight's side and gently put a hand on her shoulder. "Let me guess," he said. "You don't want to make a decision because you're afraid of what it might lead to."

"Got it in one," Twilight replied. "Ugh, I wish there was another option I could consider!"

"There is, actually." a mysterious voice said. Twilight and Raymond looked up to see a strange man in black standing in front of the desk, upon which sat a bottle of single-malt whiskey and three glasses. "My name is Alexei Wilson, and I have the solution to your problem." He took a swig of his drink, grimacing slightly as the liquid went down his throat. "You always seem to know what's best, Princess, so why not scrap the whole political system? It would make things so much simpler."

"But I've only been here for a day!" Twilight shouted. "How can you possibly think—" She looked up to see that Alexei, as well as the whiskey, were gone. "Hey, where'd he go?"

"That happens sometimes," Raymond said. "You'll get used to random loonies popping up. Mind you, I guess his suggestion is another option that that you could consider."

"What?" Twilight scoffed. "Abolish the government and make myself a dictator of some kind? Absolutely not."

Raymond shrugged. "I guess it's down to how the advisors vote, then," he replied. "Also, there is a fourth option that you could consider... if you were desperate."

"Oh?" Twilight raised an eyebrow at him. "And what would that be?"

Raymond grinned. "You could dismiss the issue entirely," he said. "Sweep the issue under the rug, and just forget about it. Sure, it might come back, but at least you won't have to make any decision that could come back to bite you in the arse."

"I like the sound of that." Twilight grinned back. "But it's like you said, we need to see how my advisors vote." She stood up and stretched her legs. "So, with that said, why don't we go and find them? Heck, let's live a little and get some lunch while we're at it."

Raymond nodded once and the two of them left the room, their steps soon fading into nothingness.