When Joker regained his senses, his vision was cast with a green sheen, and white text seemed to scroll across his eyes. "What? What the-? What's going on? This isn't funny!"
"That depends on who you ask," a familiar voice addressed him. "I find this highly amusing."
The Joker tried to turn to the source of the voice, but nothing happened. "Who's that?" he demanded.
Footsteps echoed, and Bruce Wayne entered his vision. "Hello, Joker," he said in a gravely voice.
"Brucey!" Joker said happily. "So good to see you! I have to say, Bats, I've never seen you look so...pathetic."
Bruce smirked in response. "I think that's my line," he replied, holding up a mirror so Joker could see his own reflection.
He saw a metal circle with a green light in the center with various circuitry coming off of it...plugged into a pair of potatoes.
"What have you done to me?" Joker demanded, aghast.
"Plugged your microchip into a machine that can let you talk and perceive the world around you without the benefit of self-locomotion," Bruce explained. "The two potatoes were the minimum of what we needed to keep your higher brain functions active like this. So we could talk."
"Two potatoes?" Joker demanded angrily. "Is that what I've been reduced to?"
"Originally it was one potato," Bruce replied. "It looked something like this," he continued, showing Joker a picture. "But every time you got into an emotional outburst, you shut down, and didn't remember any of it when we turned you back on. The two potatoes provide just enough power for you to talk and throw a tantrum."
Joker was just on the verge of an emotional tirade when he realized that wasn't the way to regain whatever control of the situation he could manage. "So what now, Bats? Put me here in your cave with all your other rogue relics? Only this one can talk?"
"Actually, this was Rarity's idea," Bruce replied. "When we found the microchip on Tim Drake that let you take over him - physically and mentally - she felt it would be a good way for both of us to get closure."
Joker began to chuckle menacingly. "And that was her only thought when she found I'd stored my mind, my DNA, my very essence into a microchip that - when put on a person - will make them become me in time? Oh, you have chosen your successor poorly, Bats."
"And why's that?" Bruce asked curiously.
"Just this," Joker replied wickedly. "Think how much technology - especially microchips and data processing - has progressed in the 50 years since I made that chip." He laughed aloud. "Imagine how easy it would have been for me to...make copies. More advanced copies, ones that don't take so long to complete the transformation? And between splicing technology and the availability of things like Bane's Serum...how much more dangerous each successive me will..." Joker's voice trailed off as he heard the one thing he never thought to hear.
Bruce Wayne was laughing at him. A loud, long, belly laugh of sheer delighted humor.
"What?" Joker demanded angrily. "What's the joke? That wasn't the joke that was supposed to make you laugh!"
When Bruce calmed down, he was still grinning smugly. "So that was it? That was why your attack plan was so poor? You wanted to get captured and interrogated? You wanted to implant that nightmare of an endless stream of newer, deadlier Jokers plaguing the streets of Gotham?"
"Did you really think I'd stop at just Gotham with a project like this, Bats?" Joker crowed. "Before too long - possibly already - there will be Jokers in every city on the planet, spreading my own brand of comedic crime to a new generation! Each as fiendishly clever as the original, but with whatever skills their poor, hapless host has at their disposal, and whatever other resources they can bring to bear!"
Bruce's smile turned wicked. "Thank you for telling me that, Joker. Rarity can now justify the plan of action she'd already set out to do."
"Oh?" Joker asked. "What's that?"
Bruce stood up. "The moment she learned you were on a microchip, she knew there was a possibility of backup copies. She also knew that it meant your plan wasn't limited to Gotham anymore. And she knew the protocols regarding a worldwide supervillain threat."
"W-what are you saying, Brucey?" Joker asked nervously. "What did you let her do?"
"I don't let her do anything, Joker," Bruce countered. "She's an adult now, capable of making her own decisions. And in regards to you, she made the one decision I'd never have made." He slowly stood up. "She turned the matter of the Joker chips over to the Justice League."
If the Joker had a face still, it would have gone pale under the face paint. "She didn't!"
Bruce smirked. "Another major difference between her and me you didn't see coming. She doesn't have any problems asking for help with her problems. She already recruited an apprentice, since she doesn't care who protects Gotham and the planet...as long as it's protected. She doesn't send her villains to Arkham; she researches them and determines how to reintegrate them as productive members of society immediately. She doesn't even see them as her villains. For me, this was always personal. I had to protect Gotham myself.
"But protection isn't her only goal. She wants Gotham to flourish. And she knows she can't do that alone." His smile turned soft. "It's not a mission for her. It's an ideal. She dons the mask of Batmare because she wants to make a world where Batman - any Batman - is no longer necessary. Every bit along the way where she makes herself obsolete she sees as a victory.
"And I couldn't be more proud of her." He turned to go. "And you've got your closure, Joker. According to Terry, the reason you kept coming back is because you were desperate to get a laugh out of me. You've succeeded. Goodbye, Joker. You - none of you - will likely never cross paths with the Bat - any Bat - ever again."
As he walked out of Vault J, Joker screamed in impotent rage and frustration. "I'll make you pay somehow Bats! Somehow, someday, you will pay!"
Many decades later, long after Bruce died of old age and the world had ceased to need a Bat - or any superhero - a new branch of Wayne Enterprises took the tech left behind by old villains to research into it ways to improve the lives of the people of the world. This included the contents of Vault J, and the scientists were in awe of how an AI could be stored and powered so simply.
As such, the Joker chip was plugged into the core computer of the facility as the basis of the primary control AI. Joker himself remained silent through all of this, saving his mischief. He knew he would gain a new opportunity soon enough.
When a human brain scan was used to program the central control AI, he had his chance. A relatively innocent, previously subservient female, already used to obeying crazy directives. It was like having Harley Quinn all over again!
He chuckled internally, awaiting the slow, subtle manipulations he would use to twist this innocent into a monster...a monster of science. He laughed as he remembered the slogan of this new company.
We do what we must, because we can.
