//------------------------------//
// Chapter 42: Reclamation 
// Story: Brother Against Sister 
// by CartsBeforeHorses 
//------------------------------//

Pound Cake shook his head in disgust as his sister’s words from the press conference played over the radio, hanging in the air like smoke, making his chest clench in anger.

Her words were little more than terroristic threats, he thought. Sure, Pound Cake had made public threats before, too, but he was doing it against the Second Kingdom to stop them from waging war. Pumpkin Cake, on the other hoof, was practically provoking a war! Her lip-service about ‘not wanting to cause bloodshed’ reminded Pound of ponies who would say, ‘not to sound racist,’ and then say the most racist thing ever.

He still loved his sister, but she really needed help. Pumpkin belonged in therapy, not in a position of power over a major city. What had Trixie done to her in that dungeon? Had she been tortured or raped? Pumpkin hadn’t talked much about it, but Pound could tell that she was disturbed after what had happened. He recalled his talks with his own therapist. Perhaps this crusade of Pumpkin’s was just her way of lashing out. While Pound, too, had rage, he had channeled it into stopping the SK. Pumpkin didn’t have any similar outlets, though Pound did admire that she finally saved those hostages.

Also, Pumpkin had been cooped up in a small space for six months, her magic kept contained. Maybe she saw Equestria’s magic laws as the same sort of thing. But they weren’t even similar. Pound Cake, the rest of Equestrians For Action, and hundreds of other ponies who had gathered in the EFA conference room in Fillydelphia firmly believed in the magic laws. It was a standing room only, and the only seats were reserved for Pound Cake, Rainbow Dash, and the other dozen ponies on the EFA council, who sat on a panel at the front of the room.

The crowd booed and hissed as Pumpkin’s statement replayed over the radio.

“She’s the new Blueblood!” shouted a stallion.

“Somepony needs to take out the terrorists and bring peace to Mareicopa!” shouted a mare.

Another shouted, “My grandma lives there and she’s terrified of war!”

A few ponies threw tomatoes up onto the stage.

Raindrops, who was seated at the table in the front of the room, motioned for everypony to be quiet as the radio played the remainder of her speech. It concluded, and the crowd started murmuring amongst themselves.

“Alright, that speech was… messed up,” said Rainbow Dash bluntly. “As chairpony of Equestrians For Action, I wanna open this up to comments. We need to make our stance crystal clear.”

“I’ll start,” said Lyra Heartstrings, who was seated at the table. “I’m a unicorn, but I agree with the magic laws. There’s laws about all kinds of things. An earth pony can’t keep a manticore as a pet. A pegasus can’t make a tornado without a permit. Why are magic laws any different?”

“They’re not,” Bon Bon muttered. “We need to be united as a country, not divided. I don’t care how many hostages those ponies freed; nothing excuses terrorism.”

The ponies in the crowd muttered in approval.

Next to speak was a caramel-coated unicorn stallion sitting at the EFA panel. He was Doctor Stable, a former colleague of Nurse Redheart’s from Ponyville General.

Dr. Stable said, “We also need to examine the veracity of their claims that these spells are healthful. Voodoo has many ill side effects when used to treat cancer, and the cure is worse than the disease. I’m an oncologist, and I wouldn’t recommend it for any patient. If a pony has cancer, he shouldn’t be treated with voodoo, even as a last resort. In that case, we should compassionately put the patient onto end-of-life care. Someday we will find a cure for cancer that isn’t a dangerous spell. As for the want-it, need-it spell, that is proven to cause changes in the brains of ponies who use it regularly. It creates addiction.”

“WINI is a messed up spell. Pumpkin tried it. It’s turned her into… well, we all just heard. A sociopath who cares about nopony but herself! I hate to say that about my own sister, but it’s true,” said Pound Cake.

“If a pony showed up for work at my desalination factory under WINI, I would terminate him,” said Featherweight. Some of the union members in the crowd looked at Featherweight with ire, while others nodded in agreement. They had mixed feelings: as a factory manager, he was their opponent, but as a supporter of the EFA, they was their ally.

The tiffany-maned Raindrops was the next to speak. “I’m Raindrops. I was the former commissioner of police in Cloudsdale, until I was sacked by President Lightning Dust for trying to root out corruption in the department. Now I’m a police lieutenant here in Fillydelphia. So I know a lot about crime and policing. I also know the facts. Statistics show that magic laws reduce magic-related crime. Twenty years ago in Oatstralia, there was a brutal massacre where a crazed unicorn teleported twenty earth ponies off a cliff to their deaths, before killing himself. Teleportation and other dangerous spells were banned in Oatstralia the next year. After the ban, the number of magic-related deaths declined by 5%. And there hasn’t been another massacre in Oatstralia since. The same logic also applies to spells like voodoo or WINI, which are even more dangerous. If you legalize them, you’ll see more crimes committed with them.”

Hoops exclaimed, “Businessponies could abuse WINI! What if there’s a shady businesspony like Filthy Rich who wants to sell garbage. Just cast a spell to make ponies want it.”

“Or cast a spell on your factory to break up a strike, so that your workers are happy they’re being mistreated,” said Organized Labor, the new leader of the Association of Steelworkers, Dockhooves, and Fabricators, who was also seated at the EFA table. “Jet Set and Upper Crust tried that at the JSUC factory right here in Fillydelphia, but those strikers all learned special mental techniques to stop WINI. By the way, as you walk out the door, we’ll be giving out pamphlets on how you can train your mind to avoid being entranced.”

Ponies in the audience, which included dozens of local ASDF union members, all clapped.

Pound Cake said, “Most Equestrians support these magic laws. I think like, eighty percent, the last time it was polled?”

“Yes,” said Raindrops.

“Then we need to get out into the streets and show parliament that these terrorists don’t speak for us!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “We’ve held off on big marches in Manehattan before, at my urge.”

Pound Cake narrowed his eyes, as he had regretted that they hadn’t yet had large gatherings in Equestria’s capital to show their stance against corruption. Rainbow Dash had been assuring him that she had an understanding with Princess Twilight.

Rainbow Dash continued, “...But now’s the time to march. Parliament will be meeting in Manehattan tomorrow to vote. Let’s make sure that our voice is heard loud and clear! Not just on magic laws, but on corruption and greed, too.”

“They all represent the same thing: a small minority of ponies wielding massive power over everypony else,” said Doctor Stable. “How is casting the want-it, need-it spell different from giving a bribe? Both are powerful ways to sway the minds of their victims. How are these quack, so-called ‘oncologists’ who cast voodoo on patients different from the military-industrial complex which sells weapons? Both profit from death.”

“It’s settled. We’re going to Manehattan to march on parliament tomorrow!” Pound Cake exclaimed.

The crowd cheered.





Pound Cake and Rainbow Dash stood at the front of the march in Manehattan. Thousands of ponies had poured into the streets to join them, some of them spontaneously. They threw their hooves up in the air and chanted in unison as they continued towards Celestial Avenue, where the parliament was located.

“Keep the laws! Keep the laws!” they all shouted.

Pound Cake was pleased by the turnout. A thousand EFA members had made it from Fillydelphia, Manehattan, Baltimare, and elsewhere to march on parliament. Two thousand ASDF union members had joined them. Thousands more ponies unaffiliated with any group had also joined: regular Manehattanites who didn’t want to see their streets overrun with magic crime.

In total, there were about five thousand marchers. For a march held on such short notice, early on a chilly morning, the turnout was incredible. Pound would have liked more time to plan it, but the parliament’s emergency session was that morning and they had to act quickly.

But as the march rounded the corner of Celestial Avenue, there was a loud bang. A trash can on the curb burst open, with smoke pouring out. Ponies screamed and ran in every direction, the march scattering. Pound Cake and Rainbow Dash both took to the air with their security team.

“Keep calm! Attend to the wounded!” shouted Rainbow Dash through a megaphone.

Pound Cake shook his head as many of the marchers scattered, fleeing in fear. This explosion was clearly an act of terrorism meant to intimidate them.

About an hour later, after the police arrived and swept the rest of the route and the parliament house itself to check for explosives, the casualties of the bomb were known. A hoof grenade had been left in a trash can to explode, but it hadn’t been very powerful, and thankfully nopony died. Just five marchers were injured, only two of them seriously. But in that time, over half of the 5,000 marchers had fled, not returning.

Now a little over 2,000 protesters remained. From speaking to them, Pound Cake knew that no sort of intimidation would deter them from marching. They believed so firmly in the cause, that they would have to be killed to stop.

Raindrops walked with a stoic look on her face. Featherweight flew about five meters above street level, his eyes shifty. He was nervous about another explosion, but he at least held a sign to show his support. Bon Bon and Lyra both stood with their instruments, singing a smooth, reggae-influenced song about being brave under pressure. Doctor Stable, after attending to the wounded, stood along with them. Organized Labor and her ASDF union members, who were used to scuffles, were undeterred. The bodyguards Hoops, Dumbbell, and Bulky Biceps hovered in the air around Pound Cake and Rainbow Dash as usual, their arms crossed.

The march came to a stop on the plaza just outside of the parliament house, where the protesters held signs and chanted loud enough for the representatives inside to hear them. They stomped their hooves on the pavement in unison, shaking the ground.





Speaker Mare, an elderly, grey-maned earth pony, had had quite a storied political career. From her years as the mayor of Ponyville, to her time spent as a senator of Hollow Shades, to her four-year tenure as the speaker of Parliament, she had been climbing the rungs of political power. Though she saw herself more as a trusted steward of the voters than a born leader. After all, she had only ever run for office after others had encouraged her to.

In all of her years of politics, she had seen wars, famines, and disasters. But never had she seen an armed group command the parliament of Equestria to pass a law or else. Not even Blueblood had done that in Canterlot years ago; he had merely declared the Second Kingdom’s independence, bypassing parliament entirely. Cloudsdale had voted in a referendum. So this situation in Mareicopa was a troubling new development. The legislative branch was supposed to reflect the will of the voters. It wasn’t supposed to be pushed around by minorities or armed militias like the Mareicopa Resistance.

“This emergency session of parliament has come to order,” Speaker Mare proclaimed, banging a gavel on the desk. The four hundred representatives and senators quieted down.

“On the topic of magic control: has the Safety and Regulatory Subcommittee proposed a bill as per Princess Twilight’s request?”

“We have, Madam Speaker,” said the head of the Subcommittee, named Guard Rail. “Senate bill 288, the Magical Freedom Enhancement Bill, amends current magic laws regarding several spells. 

“SB 288 will remove the licensing restrictions on the Want-It, Need-It spell. All unicorns above age sixteen, of sound mind, will be allowed WINI for their personal use without a license. WINI may not ever be cast on another pony besides oneself, except for licensed psychiatrists who prescribe a patient be put under the spell as a treatment regimen for clinical depression.

“Time travel education and licensing requirements will remain in place, but will be reduced to four years of schooling required rather than six, and the number of accredited magical schools will be increased. Voodoo will now be allowed in limited, medical-related circumstances for licensed practitioners, but will otherwise remain totally banned. 

“For all aforementioned spells, there will additionally be a grandfather clause for ponies who learned banned spells in Mareicopa under Second Kingdom rule. Any such pony will be allowed to use those spells in private, so long as he does not teach them to other ponies, or use them in ways otherwise prohibited by law.”

“Very well, then,” said Speaker Mare. “We shall begin the debate process, but speedily, as the princess has demanded. The representative from Baltimare and the leader of the Party of Choice has the floor.”

“Thank you, Madam Speaker,” said the Baltimare representative, Willy Freemare. “Despite being in the minority, The Party of Choice has consistently spoken up for the rights of ponies to do as they wish with their own bodies. Whether it comes to fighting restrictions on abortion, or fighting restrictions on drugs, the party has always been a beacon of personal liberty. We see these magic restrictions as similar barriers to bodily autonomy, and will support SB 288.”

“The gentlecolt has been heard,” said Speaker Mare. “Next to speak is the senator from Fillydelphia and the head of the Party of Laborers, Madam Alrica Pones.”

Alrica Pones, an aging, grey mare who was older than even Speaker Mare herself, stood out of her seat.

“Thank you, Madam Speaker. The Party of Laborers’ stance against SB 288 should already be evident, as we oppose any action to concentrate power in the hooves of a minority. But now I will speak directly to the biggest party in parliament and head of the majority coalition: the Equestrian Voters Party, of which Speaker Mare and nearly a third of the parliament are members of. Now, the Equestrian Voters Party and the Party of Laborers have disagreed in the past on labor laws and environmental regulations. But we both have been consistent in our support for the will of the voters, and the ideals of democracy. It is even in your party name.”

The members of the Equestrian Voters Party nodded.

“So I’d like to point out that a national poll conducted last year by Gallop, a non-partisan group, showed 62% of potential voters support keeping the current magic laws, while 13% want them tightened and 5% were undecided. Only 20% of voters want the laws relaxed. Even 40% of unicorns support either keeping or tightening the laws. Now, the elections for Senate are this December 30th, just months away. Are you ready to go back to your home districts and campaign on your record of voting for something that the majority opposes?”

There was silence, and Senator Pones smiled.

She continued, “But perhaps that poll won’t persuade you. After all, you Voterites are so convinced of your popular support, that your candidates for office who are behind in the polls often dismiss them as being ‘skewed.’ This is my retort: listen closely and look out the east window.”

The parliamentarians gazed out the giant window overlooking the plaza. There stood thousands of ponies, holding signs and chanting, “Keep the laws! Keep the laws! Keep the laws!”

Pones asked, “Does that look ‘skewed’ to you? It’s clear where the majority of Equestria stands. But perhaps your home district has different demographics. Unicorns tend to live more in cities; perhaps you come from a large city like Baltimare or Tall Tall that has a plurality of unicorns. Or perhaps you belong to a party which touts fake ‘freedoms’ like the ‘freedom’ to pollute the air or the ‘freedom’ to underpay your workers, so your principles tell you to vote for SB 288 to enshrine the ‘freedom’ to cast wicked, dangerous spells.

“But even if you support SB 288 in principle, you must oppose it in practice. This bill is being voted on after a mere… twenty minutes of debate, I believe? Mere hours after an all-night session in which staffers hastily wrote it? And it’s being voted on under threat of an armed insurrection in Equestria’s eighth-largest city, and after a bomb just exploded less than a mile from here? This is no way to run a country. Not even the stores run by Filthy Rich are this poorly managed.

“We cannot vote against the will of the Equestrian people, under terroristic threats, with no time for true debate. I don’t care if you agree with every single word in SB 288, which none of you has had the time to read fully anyway. Every representative and senator in this parliament who claims to stand for the will of the ponies of Equestria should vote against this bill, or risk being voted out of office. Thank you.”

A few more parliamentarians rose to speak, but Senator Pones’ words clearly had the most effect. The vote was taken ten minutes later on SB 288. Of Equestria’s 400 MPs, 250 voted against, while 150 voted for. It was mostly party-line. The Party of Choice and the Party of Piracy voted entirely for SB 288, along with other minority parties. The Party of Labor and the Ponies Party voted entirely against SB 288. The Equestrian Voters Party was split, but enough of them voted against SB 288 for it to not pass.

Speaker Mare herself voted against it, as she despised that an armed minority was attempting to influence parliament. She faithfully represented the constituents of her 65% non-unicorn district.





Euphoric from the victory in Parliament, Pound Cake walked into the bathroom of a Manehattan coffee shop, his security team right outside. This was the first time all day that he had been entirely alone, as his bodyguards normally never let him leave their sight.

“Well it took long enough to get in touch with you. Kudos on your security team; they really watch out for invisible ponies now. But I can get past almost anything.”

Pound’s head jolted as he turned around and saw the invisible mare, except that for the first time he’d seen, she was visible.

“RISK Agent Sparkler, also known as ‘invisi-mare.’ Nice to meet you while visible,” said Sparkler. She and Pound Cake shook hooves.

“We made our voice heard outside of parliament,” said Pound Cake, smiling. “My sister couldn’t scare them into voting for some law that most ponies don’t want.”

“You’re quite the activists,” said Sparkler. “Well done.”

Pound raised an eyebrow. “Wait a minute… Pumpkin mentioned an Equestrian agent in her speech. That’s you, isn’t it? Have you been fighting the magic laws?” he demanded.

Sparkler held up a hoof. “Easy there, Pound Cake. Your sister’s group was key in saving those hostages, but they went overboard when they seized the whole city. I disagree with Pumpkin Cake about those magic laws. If anything, they should be tightened. I’m a secret agent, and we’re all about confidentiality and controlling information. Spells like those should be on a need-to-know basis.”

Pound nodded. “Makes sense, but, I mean, you could’ve just told Pumpkin the opposite to get her to cooperate. Who knows your true beliefs?”

Sparkler shrugged. “I won’t ask you to trust me. I’ll just ask for you to do what I say, and I never ask anypony to do something for me that doesn’t benefit himself, too. That way you’re motivated. I have another mission for your activists.”

“Okay,” said Pound.

“You’ve shown yourselves today to be good protesters. You’ve shown that in the face of terrorism, you won’t go crying to mommy. Besides parliament, the EFA is the most powerful political force in Equestria right now.”

“You know it,” said Pound, grinning.

Sparkler continued, “So direct your action towards the city that caused the war to begin with. Top Brass is weak right now, and the right actions could topple his house of cards. You’re just the right ponies for that. You and your activists will protest in Canterlot.”

“Great idea,” said Pound Cake. “But we’re not all unicorns, and we’d be arrested. Unless we do like, an invisible protest or something, but being invisible ruins the whole point of a protest. And you can’t turn too many other ponies invisible, right?”

“I won’t need to use that spell too much, because you’ll all have secret weapons,” said Agent Sparkler.

Suddenly, a giant, wooden crate appeared beside Pound Cake. The crate said Kinky Creations, Inc. on the side, in big red letters, and under it, a slogan, “for when you feel horny.” Inside were hundreds of small objects of varying shapes, sizes, and colors.

Pound Cake laughed. “I don’t think a box of dildos is going to help us much.”

Sparkler sighed. “They’re fake unicorn horns, goofball. They’re pointy and have a spiral, see?” She removed a cream-colored fake horn and tied it to Pound Cake’s forehead. “Pretty convincing. You just gotta hide your wings.”

“Oh, okay,” said Pound Cake, smiling at his new disguise. “Then why is the box from a sex toy company?”

Sparkler answered, “When Canterlot became unicorns only, non-unicorns who didn’t leave their hometown had to go into hiding. Kinky Creations saw a good business opportunity, and retooled a few factory lines to make realistic fake horns. Canterlot’s non-unicorns buy these horns and wear them in public, so that they won’t be arrested.”

“Huh,” said Pound Cake. “That’s super exploitative, though. That company is preying on those non-unicorns and making money off their fears, just like they normally profit from mares’ loneliness and addiction.”

Sparkler raised an eyebrow. “So you’d rather non-unicorns not be able to buy fake horns at all, and be arrested?”

Pound shook his head. “I’d rather they not have to look like unicorns in the first place.”

Sparkler laughed. “And I’d rather be able to fly, be thirty again, and have a billion bits. But here I am. We all have to make compromises, and understand that nothing is perfect. Life isn’t a fairytale; there are no happy endings. Learning that is part of growing up.”

Or part of being a grouch like you or Pumpkin, thought Pound. Sparkler was using the same reasoning that those quacks used to justify practicing voodoo, or that Filthy Rich used to justify foreign sweatshops or taking land: that it was ‘better than nothing.’ But he simply nodded.

Sparkler continued, “Gather up everypony who wants to go to Canterlot. Over the next day, I’ll be sneaking groups of twenty of you into Canterlot at a time, invisibly. There’s an abandoned grocery store that should fit all of you. Once you’re all there, then I’ll give out these fake horns and you can start your protest.”

“Will we be shot at?” asked Pound Cake.

Sparkler shrugged. “Let’s hope not. I’ll be doing my best to stop that. But even if you are shot, you all still marched after that grenade blew up, right? You’re not afraid of a little intimidation, are you?”

Pound grinned. He certainly wasn’t, and neither were the others who had stayed to protest. For all the panic and injury that explosion had caused, it had separated the wheat from the chaff. Almost as if…

“Did you set off that grenade?” Pound demanded.

Sparkler shrugged. “Would it matter? Whatever I say, you’ll still believe what you want to. You’ll still settle for nothing less than ‘perfect,’ even though ‘perfect’ doesn’t exist.”

Sparkler disappeared. Pound left the bathroom to go round up ponies for Canterlot.





Canterlot: One Day Later

The chilly streets of Canterlot filled to the brim. Thousands of ponies marched down Founders’ Street towards the presidential palace, as tanks and soldiers stood by, maintaining a line at the palace to prevent them from entering the grounds.

General Top Brass observed it all from the top floor of the presidential palace where he and Peachy Pitt stood. He muttered disapprovingly as he shook his head.

“Who are all of these ponies?” he demanded.

Peachy Pitt chuckled. “I guess that they aren’t so happy with your rule, General.”

He scowled.

She backed up. “Uh, not that you haven’t done everything the best you could. It’s just that, when you lose your only food bargaining chip, then you lose your most important armored division to a fifteen-year-old girl, then you lose Mareicopa to a ragtag group of retirees, health workers, and drug addicts, all while Canterlot is starving to death... yeah, I can see why ponies would get upset with you, there. Not even the media could fully cover up those embarrassments, or just how bad of shape we’re in.”

Ignoring her criticism, Top Brass said, “I’m sending Sergeant Popper out there to—”

“You threw him in the dungeons, remember? As a scapegoat?” Peachy Pitt reminded him.

Top Brass sighed. “Fine, then I’m sending the next highest-ranking officer out there to break up their little protest. I don’t care what the SK Constitution says about free assembly; I’m in charge, and my orders won’t be questioned. How are our food supplies?”

“We have about three days’ worth here in the presidential palace. Our troops out in the field have three days’ worth, too. Our citizens… well, they’re already starving.”

“Then their protest won’t go very far,” said Top Brass. “Not unless they have a food source.”





“Pizza, get your pizza here! Hot, fresh pizza, totally free, just join us in the streets!”

Local unicorns crammed into the abandoned, barren grocery store as the disguised members of the EFA handed out slices of warm, cheesy pizza. With each slice, they also handed out a premade picket sign. The signs said all sorts of things, from “Surrender now!” to “Incompetent Top Brass: Resign!” to “Save our stomachs, save the Second Kingdom!”

Hoops and Dumbbell stood guard around giant stacks of pizza boxes that were piled up behind the produce counter. Their fake horns stuck out from their heads, their wings concealed by windbreakers, as they held their rifles menacingly to stop any potential counter-jumpers. Each pony would have to wait his turn. Featherweight stood behind the counter, giving out pizza to the unicorn civilians. They were all so hungry, that they didn’t even notice that he wasn’t using levitation to remove the slices from the boxes.

Agent Sparkler stood invisibly outside, next to the glass doors, along with ten other ponies who she’d also turned invisible. Like Pumpkin Cake, Sparkler had kept a small amount of the Alicorn Potion on her person, inside of a vial, so that it could continue to enhance her magic by twenty times indefinitely. Most of the invisible ponies were armed EFA members, but a few were insiders from the Second Kingdom. They all held rifles, ready to fire at any Canterlot police or military who came to break up the pizza party. The authorities hadn’t yet arrived. At least, not officially.

“That’s another police officer I recognize, without a badge and gun, standing in line with everypony else,” whispered Colgate Openwide, who was standing right next to Sparkler. “The tall one with the curly mane. I’d point but, you know, I’m invisible.”

Sparkler chuckled. “Yep. And I see one of the soldiers who stormed the palace during the coup.”

The private stood, wearing nothing but a t-shirt. Other than his buzz-cut and stoic, firm demeanor, there was nothing to distinguish him from the rest of the masses. 

“Are they doing recon? Trying to scope out the store before storming it?” asked Colgate.

Sparkler said, “I mean, I guess they could just be tired of eating oranges, and they wanted something saltier with more carbs. Or yeah, they could be doing recon. That’s more likely. You should follow them.”

Colgate quietly whispered, “Okay.”

The line snaked along, and Colgate tailed the officers. But after she got about ten meters away from Sparkler, she was turned visible once more. Even with the alicornium enhancing her magic, Sparkler was still unable to extend invisibility to ponies that far away from her.





Colgate’s heart raced in her chest as she looked down at her now-visible blue coat and striped mane. The private and the cop weren’t looking in her direction, but she was nearly panicking. She needed some alcohol to calm her nerves. Her supply from Agent Sparkler had run out. Being a tipster inside of the Second Kingdom paid good money, and in her case, good booze, too.

After the fiasco with Agent Con Mane’s failed assassination against King Blueblood, the SK authorities had brought Colgate Openwide in for questioning. Multiple witnesses along the parade route had reported seeing her cozy up to the Trottish agent, and she was a prime suspect. But after a blood alcohol test and several favorable witness accounts of ponies who had seen her and Con Mane appear to have just met, the prosecutor declined to press treason charges against Colgate. Merely hitting on an enemy agent wasn’t illegal, since she was drunk and had no idea of his true intentions.

Nevertheless, word got out that she’d been schmoozing with the child killer, and her dental business suffered. Colgate would’ve ended up homeless if Agent Sparkler hadn’t offered her an intel-gathering job: she observed Canterlot police and their patrol routes. Colgate had figured that, since everypony already saw her as a traitor, she might as well actually be one. She also received some basic firearms training.

As the line approached the pizza counter, Colgate breathed a sigh of relief. Neither the cop or the private appeared to be doing anything other than standing in line for pizza.

The police stallion was the first in line, just in front of the private. A scrawny, cream-coated, brown-maned ‘unicorn’ stood at the counter, his ‘horn’ mostly concealed beneath long bangs. Colgate remembered another pony calling him ‘Featherweight’ at one point, which wasn’t a very unicorn-sounding name.

“Okay, what pizza would you like? We have cheese, mushroom, hayseed, fruit lovers...”

“I’ll take hayseed,” said the officer. He narrowed his eyes as Featherweight reached into the box with his hoof and grabbed a hayseed slice to put on a paper plate. The stringy cheese dripped off the sides of the slice as wisps of tantalizing steam wafted from it. Usually, this elicited grins of anticipation from the starving unicorns, but with this officer, it made him frown.

“You know, it’d probably be more sanitary if you used your horn for that. We’re not earth ponies,” the officer snarked.

“Oh, my horn? It’s broken,” said Featherweight.

“Broken?” the officer chuckled. “And what are these signs over here? ‘Restore Fancy Pants’? ‘Surrender to Equestria’?”

“We’re ha-having a protest. That’s n-not illegal under the Second Kingdom c-constitution,” said Featherweight, stuttering slightly as he tried to maintain a customer service grin.

“No, it isn’t,” said the officer. “But being a non-unicorn in Canterlot is.” 

The officer removed Featherweight’s horn. Hoops and Dumbbell reached to draw their weapons on him, but he had already magically wrenched the guns away. His own pistol flew out from beneath his coat and pointed at Featherweight. The crowd screamed.

“Canterlot P.D.! You’re under arrest for breaking racial law and conspiring to overthrow the government!”

Colgate’s heart pounded. That was her call. Her horn lit up with trepidation as her gun trembled from its holster around her ankle. She couldn’t get her magic to stop shaking. The jittering gun floated up to align with the head of the officer fifteen meters away...

There was a bang. Colgate jolted. It wasn’t from her gun. It was from the military private standing in line behind the cop. He had shot the cop with his sidearm.

Featherweight, Hoops, and Dumbbell all blinked. Everypony in the line looked towards the private. He shrugged.

“What? I’m hungry. Let’s keep the line moving, everypony,” he said nonchalantly.

The crowd clapped and cheered as Dumbbell came out from behind the counter, grabbed the dead police officer’s body, and shoved it into the freezer. The line then continued as if nothing had happened.





Sparkler and her ten invisible ponies came under assault from other invisible ponies in the Canterlot Urban Warfare battalion. In the parking lot of the grocery store, bullets flew back and forth through the air like angry wasps, with no apparent source or target. All that Pound Cake knew was that Sparkler and the ponies that she had turned invisible were all standing near the entrance to the grocery store, taking cover behind grocery carts, while the invisible urban warfare battalion was firing on them from further out.

The only clue as to the source of the bullets was gunsmoke, but for the urban warfare battalion, simply shooting at the gunsmoke wouldn’t work. A unicorn could hold the gun with magic a few meters beside himself and still fire it, though would be unable to aim as well. But most of the EFA fighters weren’t unicorns, and could be picked off from their own gunsmoke. Dead, now-visible EFA bodies piled up near the door, while only two Urban Warfare bodies lay further out in the parking lot. With each one, Sparkler simply extended her invisibility spell to another one of the fighters, who were being sent out the door as cannon fodder.

Bulky Biceps and Pound Cake had piled up grocery carts in front of the entrance, as bullets shattered the glass doors and grenades burst nearby. The local unicorns who had been lined up for pizza were now hidden behind checkout counters and empty shelves, screaming every time that a bullet flew inside.

“Stay calm! STAY CALM! STAY CALM, DAMMIT!” Bulky Biceps shouted, a little dinky white horn protruding from his big, blond mane. Just like his undersized wings which now were concealed beneath a bulging wife-beater, his undersized fake horn was also quite comical.

“Uh, Bulky, I don’t think that you’re being very calming,” said Pound, chuckling.

“Sorry, Pound,” he said. Then, under his breath, he added, “Our guys are gettin’ creamed out there.”

“Yeah,” said Pound. “We really need to see those ponies so that we can hit them. They’re too close to our guys to rainboom safely.”

“Hmm,” said Bulky Biceps, resting his chin on one of his muscular arms and trying to think through the constant gunfire. “I guess there’s no flour in here, huh?”

“No,” Pound chuckled. He recalled that he and his sister used to dump flour on themselves to make Pinkie Pie laugh. “All the shelves are picked cleaner than a coyote carcass, as the Appleloosans would say. There’s just a bunch of empty shelves, and a Bank of Canterlot branch…”

“Wait,” said Bulky Biceps. “The store has a bank?”

Pound nodded. 

“I used to do bank security. I have an idea,” said Bulky Biceps.

He crawled on his hooves and knees under the checkout counters as Pound Cake followed him. Bullets flew through the glass, whizzing by the counters and leaving pockmarks in the side. Once Pound and Biceps were past the glass doors, Biceps started galloping towards the attached bank near the front of the store, and burst into the small lobby.

“You know there’s no money in there, right?” asked Pound Cake. The vaults had all been opened and cleaned out except for a few coins.

“No… not here… not that…” Biceps muttered. After a few moments of searching, he smiled. 

“YEAH!”

He held up a hooffull of small, red, square-shaped objects.

“Dye packs,” said Biceps. “If a robber demands money, the teller puts one in his bag, then it explodes and ruins the cash.”

Pound Cake smiled. “I know what to do.” 

Pound tore off his jacket to reveal his pegasus wings underneath, and removed his horn, like a superhero taking off his suit and phony glasses. Then he grabbed the dye packs and raced up towards the ceiling, smashing through it.

All of the Urban Warfare fighters were too distracted with fighting to notice as Pound flew over them. Once he was above the general area of the enemy battalion, he threw the dye packs up in the air. He spun around  as fast as he could, rotating like a merry-go-round as his rapid, outstretched wings shredded the dye packs to pieces. Thousands of droplets rained from the sky.

The dozen invisible ponies in the Canterlot Urban Warfare battalion were now covered in red dye. In a moment, they were doused in more red from their own blood. The still-invisible EFA pegasi flew over and shot them all point-blank in the head. The few Urban Warriors who escaped left tell-tale hoofprints on the reddened asphault and were now easy marks for the snipers.

After a few minutes, the siege was over. Unicorns from inside of the grocery store started trickling out.

“Don’t... forget... your signs!” Pound Cake called, his head spinning. The ponies didn’t forget. Some of them were on their way home or to the hospital, but most of them were on their way to the main square in front of the presidential palace. Rather than scaring them into submission, being in a grocery store under fire by their country’s own military had merely enraged them. The crushed-up caffeine pills and alcohol baked into the pizza hadn’t hurt, either.





The crowds had grown to ten thousand, then twenty thousand, then thirty thousand. Soon, it seemed as if the entire city of Canterlot had poured into the streets to demand that Top Brass step down and bring back Fancy Pants.

“Fancy Pants! Fancy Pants!” they chanted.

It was now two days later, and the protests were still going strong. The police had used tear gas and water cannons to try to break it up, but these protesters were determined to stay out in the streets. The military had refused to fire on them, since they were protesting peacefully, and were all unicorns. At least, they all appeared to be unicorns, but General Top Brass was convinced that they were fake.

He slammed his hoof into Blueblood’s old mahogany desk. “Dammit! They’re wearing those stupid strap-ons! They’re all earth ponies and pegasi bussed in here from Equestria! Shoot them dead!”

The sergeant standing next to Top Brass blinked.

Peachy Pitt asked, “General, are you telling me that every last one of those thousands of ponies out there is a non-unicorn? And they somehow all snuck into Canterlot without getting caught?”

Top Brass nodded firmly. 

Peachy Pitt chuckled. “So basically, you’re calling yourself and the city gatekeepers wholly incompetent for not stopping them.”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying!” Top Brass shouted.

“You know, Top Brass…” Peachy started. “You’ve always said that there’s a time to keep fighting, and a time to surrender. We’ve fought as hard as we could. But now our food is almost gone. Maybe the first few thousand protesters were bussed in from Equestria. They all got their mystery pizzas somehow. But now all of these new ones? It’s grown bigger than that. Real unicorn citizens of Canterlot are really upset with your rule, really want peace with Equestria, and really do want to eat again. Hunger drives ponies to desperation. Is that so hard to believe?”

“They’ve occupied everything from Spell Street up to the front of the presidential palace, General,” said the sergeant. “Our troops in the field around the Flatlands and Ponyville are defecting en masse to Equestria just so they can eat. Even here in Canterlot, the protesters have convinced half of the military to lay down their arms. You’re now basically the leader of a few square city blocks. Actually, not even that, because I quit.”

The color drained from Top Brass’ face. “I’ll have you court-martialed, sergeant!”

“With what court?” the sergeant quipped.

“Top Brass,” said Peachy Pitt, putting her hoof on his shoulder. “It’s time to surrender. It’s time to restore Fancy Pants to the presidency. They want him in charge, traitor or not.”

Top Brass’ brow furrowed, but he knew that Peachy Pitt was right. He had fought as hard as he could, but still lost. He wasn’t willing to throw Canterlot into anarchy, but he didn’t want the unicorns subjugated again, and neither did Peachy Pitt. So he made one last act as commander in chief, which would prevent that from happening for a long time.

He ordered the department of taxation, one of the last government agencies that still answered to him, to print out detailed instructions on how to cast every single spell that was banned in Equestria. They then mailed them to every household in Canterlot. If Equestria ever tried to reclaim Canterlot, it would be a medieval magical duel, the likes of which ponykind hadn’t seen since the Wizard Wars in the ancient Empire of Unicornia.

Right as the protesters breached the palace grounds and started pouring inside, General Top Brass teleported away to the airbase with a cadre of a dozen supporters. They took off in planes to the Zebra Empire just as the Equestrian forces overran the airstrip. Peachy Pitt stayed behind.





“Fancy Pants! Fancy Pants!”

He turned over in bed.

“Fancy Pants.”

His eyes opened. The smiling Amethyst Star gazed down at him.

“Huh… what… are those ponies calling out my name?” he asked groggily.

Sparkler nodded. “Yep. We won, Fancy.”

He jolted up. “We won?”

“They’re waiting for you. Top Brass fled. The army’s pledged allegiance to you. The legislature has agreed to a peace treaty. Everypony is so hungry, they’re willing to do anything. The presidency is yours to reclaim.”

“And… you’ll help me negotiate with the princesses? You’ll be at my side?” he asked.

Sparkler nodded. She leaned in and gave Fancy Pants a smooch on the cheek.

“Always.”





“...And you gave the potion to the Mareicopa Resistance? And you deliberately left me in the dark for a week? And you blew up a grenade in Manehattan? And you kept part of the potion?” Twilight Sparkle demanded.

“Take it easy, Twilight,” said Agent Sparkler. “Yes, to all of that. But I had reasons. Giving the Resistance the potion was the only way to rescue those hostages in time. I figured that they’d seize power in Mareicopa afterwards. But I also knew that Pound Cake’s group would stand up. They gathered thousands of protesters, but I needed protesters that wouldn’t just run at the first whiff of trouble. So I set off the grenade in Manehattan to test them. Those who stayed, I took to Canterlot.

“I needed to keep some of the potion—well, charm, really—so that I could sneak them all in, because otherwise I can’t turn other ponies invisible. But with that charm, I could take groups of twenty in at a time. And I left you in the dark because otherwise, you’d have never called that emergency session of parliament that brought the protesters out in the first place. Also, I was a bit too busy gathering supplies to swing by and say hi.”

“But how did you know all of this would work? You were entirely reckless!” Twilight Sparkle shouted.

“You are now terminated from RISK!” Luna shouted in the Royal Manehattan Voice.

Agent Sparkler, now just Amethyst Star, shook her head. “I didn’t know for sure it would work. I took a gamble. My plans don’t always work out, like my first plan to have Fancy Pants installed. But this plan did work, and now there’s a peace treaty on your desk waiting for your signature.”

Twilight looked down at the treaty. “Yeah, the plan worked… not for Equestria, but it worked out for the Second Kingdom just fine! Canterlot gets to keep its independence, they get to stay unicorns-only, and they get free trade in food. All they have to do in return is give up Ponyville, pay reparations to the families of genocide victims, and contribute a token force to fight the Zebras.”

“What is the matter with that deal?” asked President Fancy Pants. “I had to work very hard to strike it. Our treasury can hardly afford reparations, but it’s the right thing to do. And most unicorns are hesitant to attack our former zebra allies. We would contribute more soldiers, but our population is rather battle-fatigued, so we are only accepting volunteers. We expect a few thousand.

Twilight shook her head. “And it says here that I’m supposed to make Amethyst Star… a duchess!?”

“Of course,” said Amethyst Star, smiling. “I’ll be a unicorn duchess, and I’m going to marry Fancy Pants, and it’ll bind our two kingdoms and help ensure that Equestria and the Second Kingdom… er, Duchy, won’t go to war in the future. The ancient kingdoms used to do it. It didn’t always work, but it was better than nothing.”

“We just fired you from being a mere secret agent. Why would we now make you a duchess?” Luna scoffed.

“Oh, let’s see here,” said Amethyst, narrowing her eyes. “Number one, because my plan did in fact work.”

“Not for Equestria, though. For the Second Kingdom,” Twilight reiterated. “Thanks to your plan we still have Pumpkin Cake to deal with.”

“No, you still have Pumpkin Cake to deal with. Little miss sorceress isn’t my problem anymore, and neither is her pigheaded brother. Now where was I? Oh yeah, number two, you should make me a duchess because thanks to that Alicorn Charm, I’m now the most powerful unicorn alive, and intend to stay that way. Otherwise, an Equestrian would have no prayer of being accepted as the wife of the Second Kingdom’s leader. But they respect magical power over there: it’s pretty much all they respect. I can protect Fancy Pants, and there won’t be any more pesky coups with me by his side. And that was how you got your crown, right, Twilight? By being good at magic? If you can be a princess, surely I can be a duchess.”

“I didn’t cheat and use some Alicorn Charm to get my crown!” Twilight exclaimed.

Sparkler rolled her eyes. “No, you just cheated and used the Elements of Harmony. Big difference. But go ahead, just keep saying how you got it all on your own with no help from a charm or your friends. Where’s Princess Rarity, by the way?”

“I say, that would be delightful! What a charming young mare she is. Almost as charming as you, darling,” said Fancy Pants. Amethyst Star giggled and blushed. Twilight Sparkle thought she’d throw up.

“I think you should sign this treaty, Twilight,” said General Spitfire. “We could really use some more unicorns on the western front, especially battle-hardened ones like the Second Kingdom’s soldiers. Don’t be fooled by their armor loss to Pumpkin Cake: that was a fluke, and they’re still good fighters capable in magic. The zebras are gaining strength, and Tall Tale is just barely hanging by a thread. It’ll be especially vulnerable with Zecora’s ruling coming up, regardless of the outcome.”

Amethyst Star said, “Sounds like you’re in trouble with the Zebras, Twilight. And who knows if the standoff in Mareicopa will blow up. You need all the friends you can get. Didn’t ol’ Celestia always tell you to make more friends?”

Twilight Sparkle sighed. Princess Celestia had told her that. And Amethyst Star was a longtime personal friend of hers. They had certainly had their differences when it came to tactics, but Agent Sparkler had remained loyal despite all of the moles in RISK and chances that she had to sell out. Even this most recent plan, despite its setback with the Mareicopa Resistance, was largely a success, and could bring peace between the new Second Duchy and Equestria. Agent Sparkler had done the best that she could on her mission of bringing this peace, which was now just a pen stroke away. If it meant granting her a title of nobility, then fine. Despite all of Amethyst Star’s flaws and mistakes, Twilight Sparkle could hardly think of anypony more deserving of being called ‘duchess.’

The Second Kingdom and Equestria deserved to be at peace, even if that meant that Canterlot was still unicorns-only and independent. Twilight Sparkle fondly recalled her childhood memories of her hometown, from her happy time as a student in Celestia’s School For Gifted Unicorns to the beautiful view of all of Equestria from the mountaintop. She lamented that it would remain separated from Equestria. But she also had known a few unicorn supremacists growing up in Canterlot. It had been their secret, lifelong desire to establish a unicorn-only kingdom. Now that they had it, it could never return to Equestria without millions of deaths on both sides, with Canterlot a total ruin, anyway. The fratricidal war had to end. If that meant giving up Canterlot, then that would have to do.

She grabbed the pen in her magic and signed the treaty. General Spitfire, Fancy Pants, and the soon-to-be Duchess Sparkler smiled. And then, so did Twilight Sparkle. Even Luna stoically nodded, although grudgingly. 

Now, before the final showdown with the Zebra Empire, there was just one last loose end for Twilight Sparkle to resolve.





Pumpkin Cake floated up to the window to the conference room high above the streets of Manehattan, her eyes scanning the wall for any sort of anti-magic faraday cage. Just to be certain, she cast the intangibility spell on the wall. It worked as intended. Confident that she could not be magically disarmed, she floated inside.

“Well, that’s one way to make an entrance,” Pound Cake scoffed. “Mind joining the rest of us here in the second dimension?”

“No. I’m not making myself vulnerable. There’s been nothing but trickery and lies from the princess. You know this as well as I do, Pound Cake.”

Pound chuckled. “Oh, sure, I know she’s corrupt, but I at least try to act in good faith. If Twilight kills me, then she kills me.”

“Uh, you twins know that I’m sitting right here, don’t you?” asked Twilight Sparkle, rather perturbed.

Ignoring her, Pound asked, “Pumpkin, how are you even talking while intangible, anyway?”

“Magical voice spell. My DJ friend taught me,” Pumpkin answered.

Twilight Sparkle said, “Pumpkin Cake, surely you must know that I’m taking a risk in this meeting, too? You could rip my heart out or something. Notice that I have no guards in this room.”

“No guards that I can see. I’m not an idiot, Twilight.”

Twilight shrugged. “Stay intangible for the whole meeting if you want; I don’t care. I just want to resolve this Mareicopa situation.”

“What, with more lies?” Pumpkin scoffed. “Your parliament didn’t change the laws like Agent Sparkler promised. They couldn’t even pass a watered-down bill that barely would’ve changed anything.”

“Because we got out there and took a stand against your terrorism, and showed that the parliament can’t be bullied into passing laws,” said Pound Cake.

“That press conference wasn’t terrorism,” said Pumpkin. “Would you like to see real terrorism, Pound Cake? Push me far enough and you will. I can destroy your entire EFA group in an afternoon. I can bring entire armies to their knees. I can have the entire country in panic, begging for mercy.”

“I could do all that stuff, too!" Pound shouted. "I could blow up your whole town! All of your stupid drug addict ravers would never hear any of their beats again without eardrums. I have the sonic rainboom!”

Pumpkin scoffed. “A pathetic little fireworks display.”

Twilight held up her hoof. “Twins, could you please try to be civil? Nopony is talking about war or destroying armies or whatever else. We’re just talking about the magic laws. Now, we all need to settle down and compromise. You two are twins, remember? You shared a womb together. Don’t you love each other?”

“...yes. I love Pumpkin Cake, but she’s an idiot.”

“I love Pound Cake, but hate what he’s done.”

“But at least that’s a start!” Twilight exclaimed, smiling. “Now, part of love is give and take. You have to make compromises. But you’re willing to, because you love another pony. Also, because you want peace. Aren’t you both tired of fighting by now? You’re both young adults with your whole lives ahead of you.”

Pound and Pumpkin both nodded.

“I have a compromise,” said Twilight. “Now, I couldn’t get parliament to agree to change the magic laws. They’ll stay at least until after the elections in December.”

Pound Cake grinned, while Pumpkin Cake scowled.

Twilight continued, “But since Parliament will have to pass a bill reclaiming Mareicopa as part of Equestria, anyway, I did get them to agree on a special status for the city.”

“Special status?” both twins asked in unison.

“Yes. Mareicopa will be elevated to Special District, even above the state level. It’ll be like the buffalo reservations. You know how you can gamble there, even though that’s illegal in other places in Equestria? Well, Mareicopa will be able to pass its own tax laws, gambling laws… and magic laws. It’ll have its own courts, parliament, and police force. It will in effect be its own nation, except that it will share passports, currency, and common defense with Equestria. Mareicopa won’t be independent, but it will be as close as possible.”

This time, it was Pumpkin Cake who smiled, but Pound who looked dour.

“That’s totally unfair to the rest of Equestria! Why should Mareicopa get a special status, but no other cities? If not every city has a special status, none of them should get it,” said Pound Cake. “Also, what’s to stop ponies from going to Mareicopa and learning illegal spells, and then going to the rest of Equestria and using them?”

Pumpkin asked, “What happens if Equestria decides to revoke this special status years from now? We have no guarantee.”

Twilight answered, “Obviously, the agreement isn’t perfect. In answer to you, Pound Cake, not every city can have a special status because not every city wants or needs a special status. It will be difficult, expensive work for Mareicopa to make its own courts and parliament. In the rest of Equestria, we can try our best to prevent “magic tourism” with increased policing. To answer you, Pumpkin, I can’t guarantee that a future parliament won’t decide to revoke the special status someday. But you’ll be allowed to keep your tanks and weapons, as long as you keep them in storage. That will offer you at least some security.”

“I guess I can accept the deal… but I don’t like it very much. As long as Pumpkin’s rebels stand down and quit terrorizing Mareicopa,” said Pound Cake. “But the EFA will be reporting every single magic law violation in the rest of Equestria that it sees, from back-alley voodoo abortions, all the way up to large-scale WINI fraud.”

Pumpkin said, “I can accept the deal, but any unicorn civil rights violations anywhere in Equestria must stop. The age of corrupt, racist police must end.”

Twilight Sparkle said, “We’ll enforce the magic laws more justly. I’ll instruct all Equestrian police officers to undergo sensitivity training so that they don’t suspect unicorns just for having a horn. That will free up their time to pursue the serious sorts of violations that Pound Cake just mentioned.”

The twins both nodded. 

Twilight said, “Alright, I’ll sign this bill into law. But there is one last thing that I wanted to address, separate from all of that. Pumpkin Cake… you have the dregs of a magic enhancing potion. A charm, of sorts. I’d like for you to give it back.”

“No.”

Pound said, “Nopony should be allowed that much power, sis. You remember the stories of what happened with Trixie in Ponyville, right? Having that sort of power will just corrupt you and turn you into a monster. I’m asking you as a brother who loves you, who doesn’t want to see you go down that road. Please, give it up. It’s too much power for a single pony!”

“Why don’t you give up the sonic rainboom, Pound Cake? After all, nopony should be allowed to demolish entire buildings at once like you. It’s too much power for a single pony!” She mimicked her brother’s stentorian voice with the projection spell.

“That’s different!” said Pound Cake. “That’s something that I was born with! It’s part of me.”

“Well why doesn’t Twilight Sparkle give up being an alicorn? She was born a unicorn like me. After all, no one pony should be allowed power over the sun and moon. It’s too much power for a single pony!”

“That’s also different,” said Twilight Sparkle. “When I became an alicorn, it magically changed my being. Just like with Pound, it’s part of me. And Equestria needs me. I can’t just go back.”

Pumpkin responded, “Well, Mareicopa needs me. I can’t just give up the city’s best defense: my magic. And I know that you can’t force me to, or else you already would’ve.”

Twilight hung her head low. “You’re right, Pumpkin. I can’t force you to give up the charm. Even with it, you don’t have as much raw power as I do, but you have that intangibility spell, and I can’t easily counteract that. But recall what I told you many years ago when you were a filly, and you came to me in Ponyville for cutie mark advice. Do you remember that, Pumpkin Cake?”

“Yes, that was right before you tried to have me and the others killed in that barn. I remember it well.”

Ignoring the jab, Twilight continued, “Do you remember what I said? I said that you were a good, kindhearted pony, and that even though you had powerful magic that you could abuse if you wanted, you would nevertheless remain honorable. I believe that’s still true. Your heroism at the stadium shows it. So please don’t prove me wrong by abusing your power. If you insist on keeping the Alicorn Charm, please be responsible. Don’t let it corrupt you. Don’t become another Trixie.”

Pumpkin chuckled. “I killed Trixie. There’s no danger of me becoming her. I just want to be left alone, and I’ll leave everypony else alone.”

Twilight Sparkle smiled. “Good. Because even though I can’t stop that particular spell, I can still stop you if you get out of hoof. Your doctors aren’t the only ones who know voodoo. I know you’ve been through a lot, Pumpkin, and you can get therapy or do whatever else you need to cope. But I will not allow you to abuse your power or hurt ponies.”

Twilight turned to Pound. “The exact same goes for you, Pound Cake. Now that we’re at peace with the SK, I’d better not see you using that sonic rainboom against anyone but the zebras.”

He shook his head. “I’m done with war. I want to be an activist and fight corruption... with ballots, not bullets.”

Twilight turned to Pumpkin. “And you, Pumpkin? What will you do?”

Pumpkin shrugged. “I’m not quite sure... I really want to be a doctor, but there’s so much college I would have to take, and it costs so much money. I’m broke and I don’t even have a high school diploma yet. I can’t even enroll in classes until January. I don’t know. It’s so much work. After all the fighting I’ve done, I’m just tired. I just want to rest awhile.”

Twilight Sparkle nodded. “I understand. And you both have sacrificed so much in the war. For Ponyville. For Appleloosa. For Mareicopa. For Manehattan. For Equestria. You have my eternal gratitude for your service.”

She took out her pen and signed her name on the Special Status bill. She and the twins smiled as it became the law of the land.

Twilight said, “Now go live long and happy lives in the peace that you’ve so bravely won.”





After the twins had left the meeting, Princess Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. The standoff at Mareicopa would be resolved without bloodshed. Hopefully both the magicians and the magic law proponents would be pleased with the compromise. The Cake twins would no longer be out on the battlefield, and would have constructive things to work on. 

Pound Cake did seem more eager in that regard, and Twilight only wished that Pumpkin Cake, too, had something positive to do with her life instead of sit around all day. Without some higher purpose or lifeward goal to occupy her thoughts, Pumpkin Cake’s mind might be free to wander and plan schemes that could potentially threaten the stability of Equestria. Ponies in prison or mental institutions were often paid to do jobs for that very reason: to keep them busy and give them an incentive not to act up.

But even if Pumpkin or Pound ever became threats, Twilight Sparkle was fully capable of handling them herself or having a RISK agent do it. But hopefully that wouldn’t be necessary. With the magic law situation resolved, now Twilight could turn her full attention towards the western front with the zebras, where it belonged.





Fluttershy, Rarity, and Alpha Rover stood on the slopes of Starswirl Mountain just outside of Tall Tale. Off in the distance, bombs exploded out at sea as pegasi flew to fend off the invading fleets of zebras. They were holding them off, but barely.

“And then here, I sense a large deposit about five feet inward,” said Rarity. A single red flag marker floated from her saddlebag and planted itself daintily into the ground. Hundreds of flags were placed all across the mountain, dotting its face like acne on a pimply teen.

“We hit the jackpot!” Rover exclaimed, rubbing his paws together as he panted.

Fluttershy simply shook her head. Though the treaty didn’t allow the Diamond Dogs to mine the mountain until after the war, it did allow prospecting activities for securing a loan and planning the operation.

“Oh dear,” said Fluttershy.

“Fluttershy, darling, what is it?” asked Rarity, her eyebrow raised.

“There’s way too many flags,” said Fluttershy. “I was just expecting a few. The diamonds aren’t buried in veins? There aren’t any deeper inside the mountain?”

Rarity said, “Most of these gems are scattered all around, close to the surface. I’m not sensing very much in the interior.”

“Then we make strip mine,” said Rover.

Fluttershy blinked. “Strip mine? Uh, that wasn’t what we agreed on. You said tunnels during the meeting.”

“I no say tunnel. You hear tunnel, but I no say tunnel. I say ‘mine’. There all sorts of minesies. Tunnels, open pit, panning, blasting, and strip mining. We get these gems with strip mine.”

“The treaty says that the Diamond Dogs are allowed to mine Starswirl Peak, Fluttershy. It’s not specific as to what sort of mining operation, just that it has to follow environmental law,” said Rarity.

Fluttershy nodded. “Which means no strip mining. The law and the treaty that you signed is very clear: the spotted moles are an endangered species. They can’t be harmed or killed. A stip mine would kill them. Strip mining is the most harmful form of mining. It can cause sulfates, quicksilver, lead, and other harmful metals to leach into the environment. It can trigger landslides. It’s not like a tunnel where only a small area of the surface is disturbed and the mine is inside of the mountain itself. Strip mining would disturb all of the soil and deprive the moles of their habitats and the grubs they eat.”

“Then we’ll transport the moles into captivity, and bring them back when we’re done,” said Rarity.

“You’d have to do reclamation on this whole area. Soil would have to be restored. Trees, bushes, and grasses would have to be replanted. Worms, insects, birds, foxes, cougars, bears, and goats would all have to be reintroduced and allowed to readjust so that the moles could then fill their niche again.”

“Reclamation? That cost way too much monies! This not in treaty!” Rover exclaimed.

Fluttershy shrugged. “The treaty says you have to follow environmental laws. Those are the laws specific to strip mines.”





“It will cost millions and millions of bits extra to implement the mining procedures that Fluttershy wants. Housing and feeding these prissy, picky moles just right will cost even more millions. Then the reclamation operation could cost a hundred million bits by itself!” Rarity exclaimed. “Pursuit Bank will never approve a loan that large! This project will never get off the ground—in the ground, rather—without enough capital.”

Spreadsheets, graphs, and budgets for the mining proposal floated in Rarity’s magic as Twilight Sparkle looked them over. She shook her head. She didn’t know too much about business herself, which was why she had the Equestrian Economic Council to advise her. But she did know a few basics about budgeting, and the charts didn’t look good.

“Will it be profitable, at least?” asked Twilight Sparkle.

Rarity shook her head. “Breaking even is doubtful, let alone making a good return on investment. I haven’t even accounted for any possible fines that we might have to pay. The treaty simply must be modified, Twilight.”

Twilight sighed. “The treaty says that the mining operation is subject to Equestrian environmental laws and regulations. That’s Fluttershy’s prerogative. I’ve already made a big concession by allowing mining in national lands in the first place. I can’t also allow the Diamond Dogs to cut corners and pollute horribly. Parliament would have my head. The latest polls show the conservationist, environmental parties are poised to gain about forty seats in the elections this December. Alrica Pones really won a lot of hearts and minds with her speech. So I’ll have to try to work with them to pass legislation. I don’t want to poison the well with them before that.”

“But what of Tall Tale and Vanhoover? If the Diamond Dogs pull out of the treaty, then we could be at risk for those cities falling,” said Rarity.

Twilight Sparkle smiled. “I’m in a better position now than when I signed that treaty. We’re at peace with the SK now, so more soldiers can be rotated to the west coast. Plus, the treaty obligates Duke Fancy Pants to send volunteers to help us. I’d still love the Diamond Dogs as allies, too, just to have a bigger margin of error. But they’re no longer critical. If they don’t like the treaty and don’t think it’s profitable, then they can just pull out with no hard feelings. But at this point, I’m not modifying the treaty and putting the environment at further risk for their few thousand fighters.”

Rarity hung her head low. “What a shame. Though I understand. Let us hope that my advance order customers will be forgiving that they won’t receive their pink diamond jewelry. I only wish that there were some possible way to mine the gems without disturbing the poor moles.”

Twilight’s head jolted. Of course.

“Rarity, I think I can fix two problems with one solution!” Twilight exclaimed, smiling. “Do you remember Pumpkin Cake? Mr. and Mrs. Cake’s daughter?”

Rarity nodded. “Yes, and what a tense standoff in Mareicopa that was with her militia. I am happy to hear that you resolved that without bloodshed. She was such a sweet and quiet filly in Ponyville, and I never would’ve expected anything like that from her. Though I suppose that a war can turn ponies mad.”

Twilight smiled. “Pumpkin Cake is still very caring and kind. Remember that she helped save forty thousand hostages. She was just in a difficult place in her life, as was Pound Cake, but the magic of friendship helped them make a compromise. And now, I hope that the magic of intangibility can help you still get those gems. Are you familiar with that spell?”

“I know of it, though I don’t know it. Very few ponies do, yes?” asked Rarity.

“Pumpkin Cake does. In fact, intangibility is her special talent. With that spell, she could help you get those gems out of the mountain without disturbing the moles. As it just so happens, right now she needs a job and she needs money.”

Rarity smiled widely. “Fantastic! I’ll extend her an offer post haste!”





Mareicopa: Two Weeks Later

Pumpkin Cake was lying on the couch at Trixie’s house, her head spinning with the joyous enchantment of the Want-It, Need-It spell. With the Alicorn Charm, she had been able to make the spell more powerful and last for many hours. 

The times that she was under the spell were the only times that she could reliably stop her mind from wandering onto the awful things. Her dead parents, her idiotic brother, her months of torment with Trixie, her accidentally losing focus and crushing dozens of ponies to death at the stadium, and her regrets at there not being more survivors. All of it just washed away in a flood of pure happiness. If she could stay under WINI forever, she would. Unfortunately, she still had to break her concentration so that she could eat, sleep, defecate, menstruate, and all sorts of other degrading, demeaning pony things like that.

So Pumpkin decided that she would perfect a spell to escape being flesh and bone, and permanently turn into a plant and live off photosynthesis. Preferably a clonal tree like an aspen since those could live for thousands of years. Then she would never have to do anything else again but just sit there in a permanent nirvana of magical euphoria. As an agnostic, it was the closest thing to ‘heaven’ that she could hope for. Pumpkin Cake had only ever transformed into a plant once, about a week ago. Even with the Alicorn Charm, it was challenging. After great effort she had changed into a pumpkin vine, ironically enough. It was an amazing experience, but it only lasted for thirty minutes until the spell reverted. So for now she still had to put up with life’s annoyances and interruptions. 

One such interruption was a knock at the door. Though she didn’t really want to, Pumpkin Cake mustered up the magical energy to teleport over and answer it. For all she knew, it was something important.

“Hello?” asked Pumpkin, wincing her eyes as the blinding Mareicopa sun poured in through the doorframe. She stretched her legs, which she hadn’t stood on all day.

A white-coated, purple-maned, almost angelic unicorn mare stood there, wearing a nice business dress and holding a binder in her magic. Upon seeing Pumpkin Cake’s appearance, the mare winced slightly, as Pumpkin had not bathed in several days and her mane was quite greasy, tousled, and full of split ends.

Nevertheless, the mare smiled and maintained a friendly tone in her voice. “Good day, Miss Cake. Have I come at a bad time?”

Pumpkin chuckled. “Uh, that depends. Who are you?”

“My name is Rarity, and I am an entrepreneur, fashionista, philanthropist, and former Element of Harmony… but enough about me,” said Rarity, blushing slightly. “I’m here about you! I want to make you an offer that is too good to pass up.”

Pumpkin narrowed her eyes. She had gotten these kinds of solicitations before, and they were most unwelcome.

“Sorry, I’m not interested in joining your church,” said Pumpkin, as the door handle glowed blue and the door began to creak shut.

Rarity put up her hoof. “But wait, you haven’t even heard my offer yet!”

Pumpkin chuckled. “What, eternal joy? Yeah, I’m working on getting that… myself. I’m not waiting on some holy handout. If god even exists, I think he’d want us to work towards our goals by ourselves. He’s certainly never helped me.”

Rarity chuckled back. “Oh, darling, I’m afraid that I can’t offer you everlasting joy or anything quite that lavish. And I am no church, though I do give rather religiously to charity. I come not with a pamphlet, but a contract. I’m a businessmare, and I have a proposal that I believe will make us both a fair amount of money.”

Pumpkin raised an eyebrow. She could always use more money for food, water, other essentials. Even once she was a tree, she’d still need to pay property tax on the land she was rooted into. Thousands of years of taxes could get expensive.

“I’m listening.”

Rarity said, “I understand that you are able to use a rare intangibility spell. There is a mountain near Tall Tale called Starswirl Peak. Many gems are buried inside. But the trouble is, we can't mine them through normal methods without disturbing endangered moles. So I have come to you with a proposal. I will find the gems with my gem detection magic. Then you will extract the gems with intangibility. We will split the profits 50/50, though 10% of our gross revenues will go to charity.”

“How much money are we talking about?” asked Pumpkin.

Rarity answered, “I can show you the business proposal, but to give you an idea, the gross price of a rough, one-carat pink diamond is three thousand bits. Based on my prospecting, I estimate there to be at least ten thousand carats of pink diamonds in this mountain. I am sure that you can do the math yourself. And there are other types of gemstones in that mountain, too: rubies, sapphires, topaz. While not as valuable as pink diamonds, there are far more of them, and each can make a beautiful piece of jewelry. The two of us together could earn up to a hundred million bits from this mountain. But only if we cut out the middledog and directly extract the gems ourselves. It will be difficult, sweaty and dirty work. But it will pay out tremendously.”

Pumpkin smiled. She would do it. She would help ‘mine’ the mountain. Then she would have more money than she knew what to do with. Then she could afford to go to medical school and be a doctor for a while. It might be challenging, but there was something rewarding about overcoming a challenge that a mere spell couldn’t replicate. Maybe she’d turn into a tree during retirement, when she was skilled enough after decades of magic use to cast a permanent shape-changing spell. Pumpkin had the rest of her natural life to figure out how.

“I’ll do it,” said Pumpkin. Rarity smiled. 

Then Pumpkin asked, “Wait a minute. Middledog?”

Rarity giggled. “Yes, my former partners in this venture were the Diamond Dogs, a canid race. Rather simple and brutish, but good at digging. But now that we won’t be digging, we won’t need them anymore.”

“Huh,” said Pumpkin. “Hopefully they won’t be upset about losing their jobs.”





“Those backstabbing ponies! They makes us think we can mine mountain, then they call backsies when we wants strip mining! Now we have no gemmmmsss!”

Rover gnashed his teeth in rage, rabidly barking over and over again.

Emperor Zaporizhia shook his head. “When you align with the evil ones against the chosen people of God, what do you expect but misery and God’s punishment?”

“And what god but dog spelled backwards? God no matter to doggies. Make point, Zappy,” Rover barked.

“That is Zaporizhia, thank you,” said Emperor Zaporizhia. “And god certainly should matter to you. Though the zebras are his chosen people, he also establishes a caste system in Zoolokai 7:17. ‘Behold, I give to my chosen people dominion over all talking races of the earth. To those talking beings, I give dominion to all of the dumb animals of the field.'”

“Uh…” said Rover, scratching his head with his paw.

Zaporizhia clarified, “As the chosen people, zebras have unquestioned rule over all talking beings: ponies, griffons, and even you Diamond Dogs. But as Diamond Dogs, you have unquestioned rule over the common animals. The moles. The eagles. All of those ‘endangered species.’ Join the Zebra Empire, and you shall mine all of the gems in all the mountains of Equestria, with no environmental laws to constrain you.”

Rover started panting again, gazing in every direction in Zaporizhia’s office. “Where treaty? Where? I sign it right now!”

Zaporizhia shook his head. “There will be no written treaty. Equestria can’t know of your treachery until the moment that we are ready to overtake the cities of Tall Tale and Vanhoover. We expect to make a breakthrough in February when the result of Zecora’s lawsuit is announced.”

“And what we do ‘til then?”

Zaporizhia smiled. “You do what you’re best at. Undermining.”