He first felt a very excruciating headache; what followed next was him trying his best to wake up and see just what The Seven had in stored for him. As he was trying to raise himself up, he heard a voice say, "Are you all right, sir?"
Instead of answering his question, Tywin felt like teaching the owner of the said voice a thing or two about courtesy. "The word you were looking for is 'my lord'."
"Oh, forgive me my lord. It's just that you were found lying in the middle of the courtyard, and you've been contained in these chambers for nearly three days now."
"And you've come to give me milk of the poppy and toss me into some dungeon, I presume?"
"Nothing of the sort, my lord. The princess only wishes for your presence in the throne room."
"And which princess would that be? The princess of Dorne?"
"No my lord, the princess of Equestria."
The mention of that word had left Tywin puzzled for a brief moment. "I don't recall ever hearing of such a place."
"Well I do suppose that a creature such as yourself wouldn't know anything about Equestrian history."
"What do you mean by...?" before he could finish that question, Tywin saw--standing in front of him--a unicorn with a brown mustache, glasses, and a red vest. Tywin couldn't believe what he was looking at. "Is this some mummer's idea of a joke?!"
"Is something wrong, my lord?" the pony asked him.
"Alot of things are wrong," Tywin pointed out while keeping a straight face. "The fact that a pony is talking and wearing clothing is one of them!"
"My lord, we ponies of Equestria have always been blessed with the ability to speak and many other talents. Pardon my saying so, but have you ever seen a pony before?"
"Of course I have; every man that ever held a sword and bled in battle has mounted a pony before charging on the back of a horse. They've just never mounted any that could speak."
"Well, I'm sure that the princess would be most interested to know more of your...culture. But before you do make your presence, I better make sure that the cooks have prepared your breakfast--after three days, you must be starving. And no need to concern yourself with attire, my lord; your clothes are right next to the bed when you're ready to make yourself presentable."
The second the pony had left the chamber, Tywin looked at the red suit that he had worn for many occassions and was beginning to evaluate on what kind of punishment The Seven had bestowed upon him. What kind of punishment is this suppose to be? Sure, I'm not entirely fond at the idea of a pony being able to talk, but how is this suppose to be worse than eternity in the Seven Hells? His concentration was soon disrupted when the door had opened and some servant pony had placed a plate of toast and eggs before him. And so putting the matter aside at the moment, Tywin picked up his utensils as he quietly broke his fast.
...
After breaking his fast, Tywin had donned his royal garbs and was soon being escorted by two ponies that were wearing golden armor. As he was being led through hall after hall, he would occasionally glance at some of the stained-glass art that was depicting important events. They certainly have a way of preserving their history. He would soon find himself standing before a big door, that led into the throne room. As soon as he'd entered, he saw sitting upon a golden throne a tall alicorn with white fur, wavy rainbow hair, and a golden crown upon her head.
When Tywin had gotten closer, the pony princess had risen from her throne and said, "Oh good, I was beginning to think that you would never wake up. May I have the honor of knowing whom I'm addressing?"
Seeing as how he's speaking to royalty, Tywin bent his knee and addressed her with the proper title. "Your Grace, I'm Tywin of the House Lannister. And as you've might've guessed by now, I'm not exactly from these parts."
"I'm very aware of that," said the princess, "You're not the first human that I had the pleasure of acquainting myself with. And let's not be formal when addressing ourselves; Princess Celestia will do. Now, shall we head on to the kitchen?"
"That won't be necessary Princess, I've broken my fast as soon as I woke up."
"Oh not for you Tywin, I haven't had my breakfast all morning. Besides, my sister is waiting for me, and would probably like to meet you as well."
Seeing as how he had little to no options at the moment, Tywin decided to just go along with the princess at the moment. He followed her to a kitchen; it was there that he saw another alicorn, only this one had blue fur, wavy blue hair, and on her head stood a black crown. "Luna, I like you to meet our honored guest," Celestia started the introductions. "This is Tywin Lannister."
"Greetings," Luna greeted Tywin. "It's very rare that the Princess of the Night gets to meet one of her sister's friends."
"What sort of ridiculous title is that suppose to be?" asked Tywin.
"The Princess of the Night is the one who raises and lowers the moon in Equestria." Luna explained.
"You talk as if you rule this kingdom."
"That's because I do rule this kingdom."
"Last time I recall, it was Celestia who rules; she never mentioned anything about you."
"That's because my sister and I both rule Equestria." Celestia clarified.
"What do you mean you both rule?!" Tywin raised his voice in a manner that suggests that he's losing his composure.
"What my sister means is that we're the Co-rulers of Equestria." Luna further clarified.
Tywin might've been confused, but he still kept his face straight. "No, no, this makes no sense; you can't both rule this kingdom!"
"And why not?" asked Luna.
"Because a kingdom can only have one ruler," Tywin explained. "And if there's two rulers, then that means one of them is either a pretender or a usurper."
"Well I'm sure that the way you run a country where you come from is exceptional," said Celestia, "But having more than one ruler makes running a country much easier."
"Don't make this sound difficult than it already is," said Tywin, "Where I come from we have seven kingdoms, and they all bow to one ruler."
"I must imagine seven kingdoms being too much to handle for one ruler." Luna commented.
"Only when there's some rebellious usurper or some incompetent pretender who suddenly feels that he ought to sit upon the Iron Throne."
"Can we please discuss this after breakfast," Celestia requested. "I'm just really hungry." so without saying anything else, Tywin just sat himself down while the princess broke her fast.
...
When she had finally had her fill, she allowed Tywin to tell her and her sister more about his old life. But before he could even so much as open his mouth, the door slammed open and then entered a male unicorn with white fur, long blonde hair, and he also donned a white tuxedo. "Auntie, are my blueberry pankcakes ready yet? You know I can't fulfill any of my royal duties as a prince on an empty stomach." when he laid eyes upon Tywin, he let out a girly shriek as he whined, "What in Tartarus is one of those creatures doing here?!"
"Blueblood," Celestia scolded, "It's not polite to refer any of our guest as 'creatures'."
"Well it's not my fault that these creatures are born so hideous! Ugh, I thought that the ones who came to the Grand Galloping Gala were ugly; but this one's even uglier!"
"Blueblood," said Luna. But before she could say anything else, Tywin lifted his hand as a sign to tell her to be silent. He then turned to Blueblood and with that cold, expressionless stare, he said, "I take it that you live here with these two?"
"Of course I live here," said Blueblood, "I am their only nephew you know."
"Really," said Tywin, "Then I suppose that makes you their heir?"
"Well, neither of them have any sons or daughters, so I guess that does make me their heir."
"You remind me of my grandson; he too was the heir to a throne. And then one day, he would become king of all the Seven Kingdoms."
"I must imagine your grandson really enjoyed his new position."
"Yes, he did seem to like the idea of having more power over others...that is until the day he lost it."
"How did he lose it?"
"On his wedding day, someone had poured some poison into his wine; and when the poison started to take effect, you can imagine the uproar it caused. Even right now I can still see him lying on the ground, choking for air, his eyes bleeding red, and his face turning purple. I sure hope that doesn't happen to you when you take over your aunts' place as ruler. One minute you're rulling a kingdom, and then you lose it from the sip of a cup."
After listening to that morbid story, Blueblood just turned away and left the kitchen without even making so much as a squeak. When he left, Celestia said, "Oh dear Tywin, I'm sorry for your loss."
"Don't be," said Tywin, "Joffrey had it coming since the day he had Ned Stark's head chopped off."
"Pardon my saying so," said Luna, "But it seems that your way of running a kingdom seems pretty brutal."
"That's what you should expect when you play the game of thrones."
"What kind of game is that?" asked Celestia.
"It's a game of power; one person wants to gain power, while the other wants to keep it. In the end, one will either win or die." after an uncomfortable silence, Tywin decided to change the subject. "What did your nephew meant when he was refering to 'the one's'?"
"He was simply refering about the other humans that came before you." Celestia explained.
"And how might I ask did they end up here?"
"One night, I saw what appeared to be a giant, green fireball fall into Ponyville." said Luna. "After witnessing this, I immediatley warned my sister about it."
"And then that following day, I came to personally welcome them." said Celestia.
"I'm guessing that they've returned your courtesy?" Tywin wondered.
"Well, not exactly. At first they reacted very rudely towards me; they laughed when I told them I was the ruler, and their leader had made some very insulting comments towards me."
"I assume you gave them the punishment befitting for what they did?"
"I guess you can say that. After what they did, I smite their leader in the rear with lightning and I made the three of them stay in Ponyville for six days."
Tywin didn't appeared to be amused at that response. "Did your lightning permanently scarred him?"
"Not really, it was more like a pinch to the flank--nothing too serious (besides, it was rather cute the way he throws a tantrum)."
"So basically you just allowed three, impudent peasants to openly mock you, and in return you allowed them to walk away, unscathed."
"Well it wasn't like they knew they were disrespecting royalty."
"Ignorance is no excuse for insolence. If it were up to me I would've had their tongues ripped out for even so much as snickering."
"That maybe appropriate where you come from," said Luna. "But here, we tend to treat our subjects with a little more mercy."
"Mercy," he said that as if the word could make him laugh, "If there's one thing that I've learned, it's that you can't keep a kingdom from falling apart with mercy."
"And how would you know about running a kingdom?" asked Luna.
"Because of all the honors that I've received, the one I'll be remembered the most is being Hand of the king--twice."
"And what pray tell is that?"
"The Hand is the king's most trusted advisor; I've advised two kings (my childhood friend, and my own grandson). It would seem that fate has brought me to you two for a reason. Clearly you two are in desperate need of my services."
"That's very kind of you, Tywin," said Celestia, "But I'm afraid that me and my sister are more than capable of rulling Equestria on our own. However, there is somepony that could be in need of your assistance. Her name is Twilight Sparkle; she was my former student, but now she's become Equestria's newest princess. I'm sure she might find some use of your services."
"With all due respect, Celestia," Tywin responded, "My services are for more higher nobles, such as yourself."
"Your services aren't required here," said Luna, "So you're just going to have to settle with somepony who does need them."
Tywin didn't really like this option, but deep down he knew that he had no choice. So Celestia told him, "You may stay here for today, but tomorrow you shall get upon a chariot and be taken straight to Princess Twilight's castle. And don't worry, I'll be sure to give you a letter that explains everything to her."
...
That night, as Tywin was lying on his guest bed, he stared at the ceiling as he was talking to himself. "Is this your punishment? Having me serve some lower noble? Because if that's it, then I'm gravely disappointed." and when he was finished with his prayer/curse, he closed his eyes and awaited for what'll happen next.