//------------------------------//
// Journal 18 
// Story: The Courier's Journal 
// by RF and AG 
//------------------------------//

	






I Think I’m Getting Fat


I’m not kidding either. This down time and being able to eat full meals has started to put a detriment on my weight. I can’t even see my ribs anymore! 

Kidding. But in reality, I don’t know what to make of this. My diet is actually normal and I feel better because of it, yet at the same time I’m not as active as I used to be. Things are starting to annoy me, though not very much, I guess. More like a tingle in the back of my mind.

I’ve started to get a little bit of a routine, nothing really special or exciting though. Honestly sometimes the highlight of my day was sitting under the big tree in one of the yards. I got to be outside and just chill, watching things happen throughout the yard. It made me feel like I was perched on the rocky outcroppings again, waiting for something to happen.

Moving on.

The weapons have been getting dusty as well, or at least were until last week. Luna and Celestia wanted to visit Sparklebutt in her home down in the town you can see from the city gates. Yeah, I’m not going anywhere near the name of that place. 

Oh, and speaking of city gates, before I go on about my trip, they let me finally wander the city earlier this month. Had some fancy conference to tell ponies that I was not a threat and all of that political bull. Sure, I was a threat, not to ponies, but to those who needed a bullet in the brain. Either way, it was nice to be able to see what the city actually was like. I had only really known Shady Sands and New Vegas, so this was a nice change of pace. It felt a little homely, but there were still stuck up fucks like in any city that had any wealth. 

Anyway, getting back to my trip to horribly named town, it was actually a nice change of pace. Honestly, I like the town aside from the name, especially since all of the inhabitants were extremely friendly. Like to the point it was a little creepy. Though at least they weren’t actively avoiding me like in Canterlot. 

Now, I know Luna has said otherwise and has specifically warned me about certain word usages. Something about ‘summoning the greatest evil of this modern time,’ which was more nonsense in my opinion, but I wouldn’t let that stop me from writing it.

Pinkie Pie is crazy. Like … I’m not even sure how to describe it, but it’s not an evil or insane crazy. More like No-Bark and his wild stories crazy, which honestly was completely fine in my books. There needed to be more people like those two, at least they were always able to lighten the mood even when you didn’t need it. 

Still, she tried to throw me a party right then and there I think, but there is a good chance I’ve thrown her off for now (which had been a week so far) when I mentioned alcohol. She just gasped and disappeared, never to return my entire trip, which was a three day thing, mind you. 

Getting off track here; which apparently is very easy for me. The first day there was all about meeting new faces and seeing new sights. I wouldn’t get to do what I wanted until the next day, but that was fine by me, I needed it and could wait another day. So I met the rest of the cast that were there when I first threw up on the marble (the second time was only in the presence of a few guards, mind you). 

There was Diamonds (not her real name, but she did like the nickname), Fluttershy, a double rainbow, and Applejack. Diamonds was alright, but a little up tight, kind of like the White Glove Society but not cannibalistic. Applejack was the closest thing you could ever get to a literal cowboy, except the wrong species and gender, but whatever. The double rainbow was odd since it seemed to move everywhere. I didn’t think rainbows could do that, nor did I expect them to take a swing at my head when I started to question the others. No doubt Arcade would have had a hell of a time trying to explain this out of everything. Then there was Fluttershy … honestly she was too timid for me. She didn’t necessarily hide from me, but apparently some stories I told Sparklebutt had gotten out and she was rather wary. 

Ehh, whatever. Like I said, my main reason for being here was to put a few rounds down range and let off some steam. 

I did meet some other interesting ponies around town, a pair of musicians that bickered like a married couple. They were also the first lesbian couple I had seen in a few years … not including Veronica and that one time she managed to get into Cass’ pants. Either way, watching two ponies kiss was a little awkward. 

Then there was a green mare who literally looked grossed out by me. She at least said hi but quickly fled with her harp. Ehh, can’t wing them all. A few other ponies here and there, but not many really stood out for me … not including that one that had more muscles than a deathclaw. Fucking freaky! 

Right, skipping ahead to the good part. 

Apparently Sparklebutt didn’t tell her friends what I was doing here other than getting out of Canterlot. So they definitely were surprised when it was show time. 

Went out to the middle of apple heaven, literally apples everywhere! Anyway, Sparklebutt had apparently done some prep and had a few targets set out at short range, medium range, and what she thought was long range. I laughed at the last one, but said we would deal with it when it came time. 

Every pony but the three Princesses were curious at what we were doing, and Applejack began bickering with the double rainbow, which only had me even more confused as to what she was talking about. How could she compete against something that was made of light and water droplets or something like that? 

Whatever. 

So I took out Maria and put a quick few shots into the closest bag, before pausing for a second. I swear I could almost hear the cries of surprise from the ponies before I unloaded the rest into the target. 

Let me tell you, that caused a nice little chewing out by pretty much every single one of them. The ones out of the loop, in terms of what we were doing, were yelling about what I was doing. The ones in the loop were yelling at me for not warning them. Honestly, you can’t please anyone. 

So I gave them a basic rundown on guns, how they worked, and why to never walk in front of me for the duration of this time. I think I let Sparklebutt down a little by not fully explaining the mechanisms, but for once, I did not care at all. I was here for my sake, not hers. 

Did I mention that she brought out cases of ammo? Yeah, in a little under a month she had fabricated more ammo for me to use, and had apparently tested it to make sure it wouldn’t do the one thing I would probably strangle her for. I was hesitant at first, but when the first round fired from Maria without a problem, I breathed easier before proceeding to up the ante in terms of gun handling. 

Took the All American for a spin for the first time since the Dam, and boy did it feel good to have the gun kick into my shoulder again. It felt nearly orgasmic … yeah I’m fucked, okay? Anyway, it felt awesome to be able to fire off a full magazine into a target and shred it completely. According to Luna later, the  display was awe inspiring and yet full of fear. I never did look back at the rest except for to tell Twilight her long target was short.

She bitched and moaned about how her tests confirmed that that was the suitable range for a point three-oh-eight round. I just laughed and told her to place it at a mile and a half. It was also at that moment I learned that ponies didn’t use the same measurement system as us, but apparently some race did. Also I found out she could nearly immediately calculate the mile to ‘kilometer’ (whatever that is) conversion in her head. Damn good work, Sparklebutt.

I got into a nice prone shooting position, and worked out a few calculations of my own, which Boone had taught me, which was made easier by Sparklebutt telling me the wind speed and elevation. She then blathered on about ignoring the double rainbow, but I paid her no heed, it wasn’t that special anymore. 

Honestly the best part of the day was telling her to shut her trap before putting a round through the bullseye on the target. Sure, shooting off the follow up shots were fun, but to hear her stumble over her words was rather fulfilling.

After teaching the double rainbow to shoot, and yes, I did know she was a pony the entire time, using some weird utensil Sparklebutt cooked up, we called it a night more or less. And that was the highlight of the month.

Yeah … I was starting to feel better. As well it seemed that the castle wasn’t as cramped anymore. Maybe it was starting to feel homely, finally.