//------------------------------//
// Hasbro Ex Machina 
// Story: The Hiatus Zone 
// by SirWritesalot 
//------------------------------//

	But first, they had to go through the standard procedures that all characters must submit to before returning to their worlds, of course. Upon exiting the main atrium of the Hiatus Zone, the Mane Seven walked down a short hallway and emerged into a grey, sparsely furnished room staffed by several of the TV Police. One of them was flipping through a stack of pages on a clipboard. “We’re almost there!” Rainbow Dash whispered excitedly to the others, finding it hard to hold back her enthusiasm but knowing that she had to do it for just a little while longer.
Once all of the Mane Seven were assembled in the room, the Policeman with the clipboard seemed to reach the page he was looking for. “Names?” he asked simply.
Twilight opened her mouth to answer, but was preempted by Pinkie Pie. Indicating each of her corresponding friends with a hoof, Pinkie said happily, “Here’s Purple Smart! And Yellow Quiet! And…” The TV Policeman raised an eyebrow at the announcement of these names, and Twilight quickly interrupted Pinkie in order to correct her.
“What Pinkie means to say is that I’m Twilight Sparkle, and my friends are Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Spike,” she said, pointing to each in turn just as Pinkie had been doing. “We’re from the TV show ‘My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic,’ and we’re ready to start season 5!” Since the Mane Seven had already gone through this process in the past, Twilight knew what the TV Policeman wanted to hear.
“Well, that all seems to be in order, then,” the Policeman said, checking off each of their names on the clipboard. “Please proceed.” He gestured to another part of the room, where other TV Police were standing next to a large scanner that looked similar to the way a walk-through metal detector would look in an ordinary human world.
The Mane Seven walked over to the scanner and lined up single-file. “If anyone is currently in possession of any non-canon paraphernalia, please surrender it now,” one of the TV Police said sternly. Judging by the way the other TV Police were acting, he seemed to have the highest rank. “Transporting non-canon items beyond this point, no matter how innocuous, is strictly prohibited.”
“Nothing here,” Spike said.
“Me, neither,” said Applejack.
The rest of the Mane Seven replied negatively as well…until it was Pinkie’s turn. “Does this count?” she asked, holding up a black and blue ring-shaped disc. The blue rings toward the inside and outside were glowing almost as if they were actually neon lights.
"Where did you get that?” Twilight asked. Pinkie certainly hadn’t been carrying the disc around before.
“From Beck,” Pinkie replied.
“Who’s Beck?” Rainbow Dash asked, but before Pinkie got the chance to answer, the TV Policeman interrupted.
“Hand it over,” he said, and roughly pulled it away without even giving Pinkie the chance to follow his order. Then, into a walkie talkie, he said, “Check on the cancellation status of the Tron: Uprising characters. One of their discs just showed up in a canon check.”
There was a long pause, during which the Mane Seven were forced to wait silently. “They’re still down there,” whoever was on the other end finally replied.
“How did you get this?” the TV Policeman asked Pinkie angrily upon hearing this news. He brandished the disc at her.
Pinkie ignored the question. “Look, I’ve got this, too!” she said, pulling out a rounded green thing with white spots on it. “It’s some kind of mushroom.”
“Which of the Mario shows did you get that from? Did the Mario shows even have life mushrooms?” the TV Policeman asked, the second question directed toward his associates, who shrugged. “Give it to me!” he finished angrily.
“No, it’s okay. I’ll just eat it!” Pinkie said, and she did, gulping down the whole thing in one bite. Not willing to let defiance of this sort stand, the TV Policeman was about to order the others to drag her to the Cancellation Zone immediately, but they managed to change his mind…though not really for the better.
“Think about it,” one of them whispered to him. “She ate a life mushroom. So what do we have to do in order to ensure that she enters her world in her proper canonical state?” The lead Policeman immediately understood what the other was getting at, and smiled.
“Come with me,” he told Pinkie. It would be easier if she would come willingly, but he could get the others to apprehend her if necessary. Then he had an idea that would probably simplify things. “We’re going to have a party!” he said with fake enthusiasm.
“Okay!” Pinkie said brightly, and started following him. “Can my friends come, too?”
“No,” he said. Pinkie was disappointed, but continued to follow him anyway. Even she could sense that it wouldn’t be a good idea to defy him again. He opened a door at the side of the room, and beckoned her to enter.
“Don’t worry! I’ll bring you back some cake and balloons!” Pinkie said, looking back at the others. She could see the worried looks on her friends’ faces, but didn’t think she had much of a choice but to do what the Policeman said.
“What are you doing? Don’t trust him!” Rainbow Dash shouted. The Mane Seven (minus Pinkie) left their line formation and rushed to follow them, but the TV Police moved into action and blocked the way. The Policeman and Pinkie entered the other room and the door closed behind them.
“What exactly was that mushroom she ate?” Rarity asked the TV Policemen.
“It was a life mushroom,” one of them offered. “It gives you another life.”
Upon hearing this, the Mane Seven (minus Pinkie, of course) guessed what was about to happen right before it did. A loud, “BANG!” came from the other room, muffled only slightly by the closed door. A few moments later, the TV Policeman exited the room, followed by Pinkie, whose mane was now straight and dripping with a viscous red substance on one side. Her usual bright pink color seemed more subdued as well, in a way the rest of the Mane Seven had only seen once before.
Pinkie saw all of them looking at her in wide-eyed shock. “I hate this place,” she muttered angrily. Then she rejoined the others, who wanted to comfort her but weren’t sure how best to handle such a situation.
“Is that…?” Twilight started to ask.
“No, it’s Kool-Aid!” Pinkie said in an odd tone.
“Are you okay?” Fluttershy finally asked with sympathy and a hint of fear.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Pinkie said, turning away from everypony else.
“Well, now that that’s over with, does anyone else have anything non-canon?” the lead Policeman asked, seeming to be in a better mood now. The Mane Seven shook their heads, refusing to even make eye contact with him. “Alright, then just go through the scanner and we’ll make sure.”
The Mane Seven filed through the scanner one by one, none of them raising any kind of suspicion…until it was Applejack’s turn. As she passed through, an alarm began to blare and she froze in confusion. “What? I don’t have anything non-canon! I swear!” she said.
The lead Policeman looked at a screen on the side of the scanner. “Actually, it looks like you do,” he said with a grin.
“What?” I…the hat! Pinkie, did you take this from comic me?” Applejack asked. Pinkie was still turned away, and didn’t acknowledge the question at all. Applejack supposed that she couldn’t really be mad at Pinkie after what she had just been through, but that didn’t change the situation that she, herself, was in now.
“I wasn’t trying to smuggle it through! Honest!” Applejack said. “Here, take it!” She took the hat off and threw it to the TV Policemen.
The lead Policeman was fed up with all of the defiance that he’d been receiving lately, and this time he didn’t hesitate to say, “Well, it looks like someone’s about to get cancelled.”
“NO!” the Mane Seven (except for Pinkie, who seemed to be rather detached from the outside world at the moment) shouted together as the TV Police converged on Applejack.
"Please don’t do this,” Twilight said in desperation. “The show canon and the comic canon are practically the same thing! The hats look identical! Does it really matter?”
“Actually, the show canon and the comic canon are theoretically intended to be the same thing, but some fans still think they don’t fit together well enough. As long as a large enough number of fans feel that way, we have to keep them separate,” one of the TV Police explained, actually sounding slightly regretful.
“But you can’t just take Applejack away!” Rarity said. “Um…it would ruin the canon of the show. How can we have the Mane Six if there are only five of us?” Spike frowned at this, though he knew what she was obviously getting at. “We won’t have an Element of Honesty!”
The TV Police paused in their attempt to apprehend Applejack, who was bucking and generally refusing to go without a fight in any way she could, and looked at the leader of their squadron. “Take her away,” he said. “We’ll just have to find a replacement.” With a flash of inspiration, he took out the walkie talkie again and said, “Bring Sunset Shimmer to the TV Division as soon as possible.”
The Mane Seven (aside from Pinkie) were aghast. “You can’t just ‘replace’ Applejack!” Rainbow Dash said. “She’s one of a kind!” She flew as high as she could (though the ceiling wasn’t very high) and tried to dive at the TV Police, but was immediately met with a tranquilizer dart from the same gun that had finally been used to subdue Applejack.
“NO!” Twilight shouted. She finally tried to use her magic in whatever way she could to get them out of the situation, but it was no use. As she already knew from previous experiences here, unicorn magic either didn’t work outside Equestria at all, or was blocked by some kind of protection the Facility had against it. Rarity, Fluttershy, and Spike wanted to help, but Rarity’s magic didn’t work, either; Fluttershy was too afraid; and Spike wasn’t sure how he could. Pinkie was still silent.
The lead Policeman looked at the unconscious body of Rainbow Dash, chuckled, and said, “Congratulations, Spike! You’re the new Rainbow Dash!” Then, to the other Policemen, he added, “Take her away, too.” Around this point, Pinkie finally seemed to come back to reality, at least in terms of realizing what was going on, but she still wasn’t even close to her usual cheery self.
As their friends were taken away, the Mane…Five were paralyzed with shock, anger, and sadness. “We’ll…we’ll start a petition!” Spike said suddenly. “To keep Applejack and Rainbow Dash on the show!”
“Good luck with that,” the lead Policeman said, and then their friends were gone. Only one of the TV Police - the one who had explained the show / comic canon situation - stayed behind with the Mane Five.
After making sure that the others were entirely out of earshot, this lone member of the TV Police whispered, “I’ll have this case relayed to someone higher up right away. I have a feeling that they won’t be happy about this either.”
The Mane Five (except Pinkie, who was still feeling down in general) brightened at this news, but didn’t want to get their hopes too high yet. For all they knew, this Policeman was just setting them up to have their spirits crushed even more. But they complied as he led them to another room to wait for the arrival of Sunset Shimmer.
“Are you sure you’re okay, dear?” Rarity asked Pinkie.
“I said I don’t want to talk about it,” Pinkie replied. The rest of the Mane Five were still very worried, both for her sake and for the sakes of Applejack and Rainbow Dash. They couldn’t believe what had happened – they had been so close to getting back to Equestria for season 5, and now…this.
Before long, the door to the room opened and Sunset Shimmer entered, in human form and seeming very nervous. The Mane Five didn’t exactly feel like welcoming her, but they didn’t think it would be fair to antagonize her in any way, either – after all, it wasn’t her fault that Applejack and Rainbow Dash were being removed from the show. “Um…hi?” she said tentatively. No one responded.
“I’m sorry. I really am,” she said sadly. “I mean, I’d love to join you on the show, but not like this. I know I can’t really replace your friends.”
“Why are the TV Police even letting you join?” Twilight asked, trying to remain calm but failing to remove all of the anger from her voice. “They only took Applejack because she had something from the comics, which are apparently non-canon enough to be a problem. Aren’t the ‘Equestria Girls’ movies the same way? I know there’s a separate movie me somewhere, so they must be.”
“Some of them were talking to each other on the way here,” Sunset Shimmer said. “They think Applejack’s cancellation was really just because of a power trip one of them went on rather than a real concern for the integrity of the show’s canon. And with regards to the movie and TV show canon being considered separate by some people, they think that letting me join the show will just get rid of the problem. The connection already started to become more acceptable after Rainbow Rocks came out, and if I appear on the show, then the last holdouts will probably have to accept that the movies and the show share the same canon.”
“But you’re still human,” Spike pointed out.
“They said that I’ll turn back into a pony as soon as we enter Equestria,” Sunset Shimmer said. “The writers will just have to throw in some explanation saying that I came back. Anyway, they’re supposed to be coming and getting us anytime now.” She couldn’t help but sound a little excited when she made the last statement, though the rest of the new Mane Six were no longer able to muster any enthusiasm at all.
Suddenly, the door opened. The new Mane Six waited tensely, expecting it to be the TV Police coming to make them move on with season 5. So they were very pleasantly surprised when they saw who it actually was.
“Hey, everypony! Did you miss me? The show wouldn’t be the same without the most awesome pony in Equestria, after all!” Rainbow Dash said, doing a spin as she zoomed into the room and then landed.
Immediately after this display, Applejack entered. “Guess who didn’t get cancelled after all!” she said, tossing a new, officially canonical hat in the air and catching it on her head.
The previously new Mane Six (minus Sunset Shimmer) experienced an immense rush of happiness at that moment. In fact, it was so intense and infectious that it even affected Pinkie – the joy of seeing her friends again when it had seemed like they might be lost forever was enough to shock her back to normal. Her color instantly returned, and her hair popped back into its normal shape so quickly that it shook off all of the red substance that had dried on it. “YOU DIDN’T!” she shouted, and everypony ran forward to hug their friends and to welcome them back. Sunset Shimmer joined in as well, though she had to fight back a slight twinge of disappointment upon realizing that she probably wasn’t going to be on the show after all. Nevertheless, she knew how much the Mane Seven meant to each other, and was actually glad that she wouldn’t be coming between them.
“How did this happen?” Twilight asked once the exhilaration of being reunited had died down. “How did you avoid getting cancelled?”
As if this was their cue, a tall person with no face (but wearing a suit and tie) suddenly stepped around the corner and into the room. “I put a stop to it,” it said simply despite having no mouth (yes, it – a “faceless” corporation doesn’t exactly have a gender).
“Slenderman?” Pinkie asked, wondering what he had to do with anything.
“No, Hasbro,” corrected the person.
“Are you the ‘someone higher up’ that one of the TV Police mentioned earlier?” Rarity asked.
“You could say that,” Hasbro said.
“Hasbro showed up just as the TV Police were going to throw us into the Cancellation Zone!” Applejack said. “In fact, it ended up pushing that member of the TV Police who…” She cut herself off, glancing at Pinkie and deciding it would be best not to mention what had happened, especially since Pinkie seemed to be back to normal now. “Who…you know…into the Cancellation Zone instead!”
“We’re not sure if it’ll actually do anything since he’s not a TV show character, but at least he’ll be stuck down there for a while,” Rainbow Dash added.
“This all seems almost too good to be true,” Twilight said.
“Well, the writers refused to write them out of the show and it would be a shame to waste all the merchandising opportunities that they present, so it seemed like a little executive meddling could be acceptable in this case,” Hasbro said. “Besides, the fans wouldn’t have liked the delay that there would have been otherwise. Speaking of which, this whole thing will stay behind the scenes, of course – the fans don’t need to know about it.”
"So who are you, really?” Spike asked.
“You’ve really never heard of me? Why, it’s because of me that your show exists in the first place!” Hasbro said. Everypony fell silent, considering the implications of this.
“So you’re the one who chooses whether to renew or cancel us?” Pinkie blurted out.
“Yes,” Hasbro said, and everypony fell silent again. “I control many of the shows on your channel. And your wings and castle were partially my idea as well,” it continued, nodding at Twilight, who blushed.
“Um…then if it’s not too much trouble, could you…maybe…never cancel our show?” Fluttershy asked, suddenly getting the urge to at least try to be assertive, but finding it difficult in the face of such a formidable being.
“I can’t promise that,” Hasbro said. “If your ratings fall too much for any reason, it’s likely to happen. But you have a movie planned for 2017, and its release will hopefully ensure that you and your show remain popular for as long as possible.” Everypony wasn’t quite sure what to think about this – the Mane Seven had always assumed that their show would be cancelled eventually, but hearing the being who was actually going to be responsible for it say so felt different somehow. Nevertheless, Hasbro had saved Applejack and Rainbow Dash from an early cancellation, so the Mane Seven couldn’t really be too angry at the moment.
“Besides, you don’t need to worry yet. A sixth season of your show is planned - it was just revealed yesterday,” Hasbro added. The Mane Seven immediately cheered up upon hearing this.
“AWESOME!” Rainbow Dash shouted, flying up a bit and hovering in the air. She just couldn’t hold back her enthusiasm.
"Thank you so much!” Twilight said. The others expressed their agreement.
Once everypony had calmed down, Pinkie asked, “If you control the shows on our network, could you bring back ‘Dan Vs.’?”
“There aren’t any plans for it right now,” Hasbro replied. “But ‘Littlest Pet Shop’ is planned for renewal as well. Its characters are back in the Hiatus Zone since their most recent season ended recently. And we’ll also renew at least a couple other shows.”
“That’s good,” Fluttershy said.
“What about me?” Sunset Shimmer asked, finally speaking up.
“You have a movie coming up, too,” Hasbro said. “’Friendship Games.’ After that, your fate hasn’t been determined yet.” Sunset Shimmer was both relieved to hear about the new movie and a little worried by the ominous sound of Hasbro’s other statement. “But the response to your recent web short has been good, so your future should be pretty bright.”
“Did her movie delay the beginning of our season?” Rarity asked. “No offense, darling,” she added to Sunset Shimmer. “I’m just wondering.”
“Me, too,” Rainbow Dash said.
“No, a different team was working on that. If anything, your season was held up by the transition from The Hub to Discovery Family,” Hasbro said.
“Oh…” said Twilight. “I almost forgot about that!”
Hasbro looked at a watch. “Well, it’s April 1st, and the show premieres on the 4th! It’s time for you to head back and get ready! Follow me.”
The Mane Seven and Sunset Shimmer all followed Hasbro out the door and down a series of blank grey hallways until they reached the door through which they used to enter Equestria. It was marked with the logo for the Hub Network, but it was boarded up.
“It could happen, only on The Hub,” Fluttershy said softly. And then they moved on, soon reaching a brand new door emblazoned with the Discovery Family logo.
“This is it!” Hasbro said. It opened the door and everypony looked inside – even Sunset Shimmer. Not far away stood Ponyville, where everypony else seemed to have already returned. If they squinted, they could just about see Derpy hovering over one of the taller buildings.
“Well, I hope to see you again,” Sunset Shimmer said. The Mane Seven agreed.
“But under better circumstances next time, I hope!” Applejack said. Sunset Shimmer smiled.
“I’d better go make sure the premiere will be ready for Babscon,” Hasbro said to itself, checking its watch again, and it turned to leave. “Enjoy season 5!” It walked away, and Sunset Shimmer followed.
“You know, I’ve been thinking,” Rarity said. “If we’re just going to get cancelled someday, anyway, then does what we do while our show is running really matter?”
The rest of the Mane Seven thought for a while. “Well, the fans think so!” Twilight finally said. “And I guess we just have to think so, too!”
“She’s right,” said Pinkie Pie. “Even I’m afraid of being cancelled someday, but we can’t go through the season feeling worried all the time! We’ve got to keep our spirits up and SMILE! Now, come on everypony! Let’s go!”
With this encouragement, the Mane Seven finally filed through the door and into Equestria. Looking back, they saw that the door had already disappeared.
Then they looked at each other and grinned. Just being back in their home world was enough to cheer them up, with all of their worries and bad memories of the Hiatus Zone and the Facility already beginning to fade away.
“Race you to Twilight’s castle!” Rainbow Dash called, zooming ahead.
“Hey, no fair!” Spike said. Twilight beckoned for him to climb on her back and everypony started running or flying to Ponyville as quickly as they could, finally back to laughing and chattering in excitement together as they did.
“Season 5 is going to be so AWESOME!” Rainbow Dash shouted. And it was.