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// Chapter 2 
// Story: The Sun Has Lost Its Mind 
// by MareDoVVell 
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Luna tore her gaze from Celestia to look back to Twilight, who was still waiting, her hoof outstretched in anticipation of the piece of paper that had so rudely interrupted her class. “Sis, you may want to do something about that n...!” She was suddenly interrupted by the mild, slightly bitter taste of paper in her mouth.

“If you have ever loved me, even the tiniest bit, you will swallow that right now.” Celestia whispered urgently, retracting her hoof as quickly as it had extended to shove the incriminating note into Luna’s mouth.

Luna simply gave her a pitiful, slightly disgusted expression, but at seeing the panic and fear consuming Celestia, she clenched her eyes shut and swallowed, wincing the moment it was down. “You’re the worst,” she moaned as soon as her mouth was empty, giving a dramatic frown as if she had just been made to swallow curdled milk. She may have been playing the situation up a little, especially considering it was just a dream, but she could've sworn she could taste every bit of the paper and crayon.

“Oh shut up, it was just paper!” Celestia started to argue. The fear had leaked away a little, but she was still on edge, and getting into a good back and forth with Luna was always a good way to bleed off some extra adrenaline. Unfortunately any further words from either of them were cut off.

“Girls! I am so disappointed in both of you!” Twilight admonished from the front, beginning to walk towards both of them. “Celestia, you should know better than to pass notes in class, and on top of that you go and make even more of a fuss by torturing your poor sister!”

Luna grinned smugly as Twilight lectured Celestia, reveling in watching her squirm, but her victory was short lived as Twilight then turned on her. “And you Luna, I’ve told you before to stand up for yourself, and on top of that, you should know better than to be complicit in a crime by destroying evidence. You are normally so well behaved in my class!”

“What are you even talking about!” Luna yelled, beginning to get frustrated. She did not take being lectured well, she never had, possibly because it usually came from her big sister. Despite not coming from Celestia, this lecture was at the hands of a pony thousands of years her junior, and one that was just a dream figment at that. “You’ve told me no such thing, I've never been here before! You’re not even real, none of this is real! This is all just a stupid dream concocted by my idiot sister!” she raged.

“Well, be that as it may, I will not have you two hijacking my class.” Twilight said with a deadly calm. She was taking the revelation that she was apparently non-existent very well.

Luna deadpanned, pressing a hoof to her temple. “That’s it, this is dumb, I’m out.” she muttered, throwing her hooves up in exasperation before closing her eyes and sliding back into reality.

When she opened her eyes again she was back in the bedroom, still looming over Celestia’s quietly snoozing form. “That was completely ridiculous,” she fumed, giving her sister a stiff kick to the side.

Celestia startled awake almost immediately with an undignified snort. She had always been a light sleeper, a trait she was now deeply regretting. "What was that for?" she asked forlornly. "I was in the middle of class."

"Shut up you!" Luna's mood was not improved by Celestia's complaints. "It's not like you would've learned anything by leering at her butt all night! Not to mention anything you would have learned in that class would be things pulled from your own empty head! You know as well as I do that there was no class, there was no teacher Twilight, and while I can still taste it, there was no damned note! Now you are going to explain to me right now what has got you so spooked by that dream!"

Celestia winced and the tiny voice in the back of her mind insisting Luna would forget all about why any of this was happening went quiet. "I thought you wanted me to shut up?" she whispered the words, which normally would have sounded smug given the situation, but instead sounded oddly hopeful.

Luna merely crossed her hooves, staring daggers into Celestia and making it clear she wouldn't take silence as a suitable answer.

"Ugggh fiiiiiiiiiine." Celestia moaned, her body slumping forward like an under stuffed pillow. She knew it was time to just give in, so she closed her eyes and taking a breath to steady herself. "I have a huge crush on Twilight and it utterly terrifies me." she admitted with a very strange combination of a wince and a blush.

Luna starred at her suspiciously, looking for any sign of a lie or omission, but as best she could tell, this was finally the answer she was looking for, which disappointed her immensely. "That doesn't seem like much of a big reveal Tia, it doesn't even seem that in-ordinary, even watching from the moon I could tell you had a thing for your last student too, what was her name, Sunset something?"

Celestia's face crinkled with a lecherous grin. "Shimmer, Sunset Shimmer, yeah, she was super cute," she gushed. "She could just be so...so...mmm...mean!" her eyes were half-lidded at this point and she was clearly breathing a bit heavier. "It was awesome!"

Luna leaned away and grimaced at the look on her sister's face.

"You should have seen it," Celestia went on, not noticing Luna's discomfort. "This one time, I was trying to get her all riled up so she'd hit me! Then I could've made my move, the hate sex would have been sooooooo good!" Suddenly she snapped out of her lewd demeanor, now looking slightly sad. "Instead she just yelled a bunch and ran away, never saw her again after that."

Luna rolled her eyes, entirely unsurprised. "You are such a cradle-robbing pervert, y'know that?"

Celestia gasped at the accusation. "How could you say that about your own sister?! At least...at least...at least I don't like stallions!" she threw back, having been unable to come up with any worthwhile retort.

Instead of looking hurt by the lame jab, Luna merely huffed. "Don't remind me" she answered flatly. "Can you imagine the chaos if the public found out that another princess was actually straight, and single at that? The palace gates would be under siege in minutes by stallions wielding bouquets and chocolates." She mock dry heaved at the thought. "Thank the stars magical reproduction was discovered, or I'd be turned into some kind of Queen at a baby farm." She shuddered, having let the thought stick in her mind a little too long. "Anyways, you're not getting out of this that easily. If you are so willing to admit you've wanted to bed your students before, why are you avoiding your strangely innocent Twilight dreams?"

"The innocent part is the problem, this time it's different Luna!" Celestia groaned, looking worried again. "With Sunset and all the others it was totally normal, get em into my bed...or yours...then get em out again in time to raise the Sun, but with Twilight something's different and I can't figure out why!" She said the last words as if they were shattering her perception of reality, flailing her forehooves wildly.

Luna simply smirked. "And to think, it was only hours ago you discovered your sexuality, and now you're in love with Twilight Sparkle" she teased, secretly relieved to find her sister was even capable of feeling typical romantic affection.

"I am not in love with her!" Celestia shot back too quickly. "I just...think she's cute, and smart, and brave, and clever and..." Celestia paused, the building blush on her face reaching new levels as her eyes widened slightly. "...and I'm totally in love with her aren't I?" Her hooves were plastered to her face in a mixture of embarrassment and glee at the realization. The look faded away after a minute though, replaced by a troubled thousand yard stare. "Luna, I don't know how to be in love."

Luna just giggled, her general frustration with her sister starting to dissipate now that everything was in the open. "Being in love isn't something you learn how to do ya big dummy, you just sort of do it. Why don't you just go ask her out to dinner or something?" she suggested, already imagining the possibilities whimsically in her head. Despite being a bit of a shut in and a closeted heterosexual, she still had a deeply ingrained sense of romanticism, likely rivaled only by Cadance.

Celestia however, balked at the suggestion immediately. "I can't just swoop down into Ponyville and ask out Twilight Sparkle! Are you some kind of mad mare?!"

Luna was taken aback by her sister's reaction, not really sure why it seemed so outlandish a suggestion. "Why not? What's the big deal Tia?" Celestia hesitated a moment, but then opened her mouth to answer just in time for Luna to cut her off. "Is it because you're a Princess and she's not?"

"Of course not! You know I don't care about that," Celestia scoffed. "Besides even if I did, you know I could create a position for her in like less than two hours, maybe Grand Archlibrarian of all Equestria or something? She'd probably like that."

Luna put her hoof to her chin pensively for a moment. Now that the guessing game had started, they both knew she had to be given a few tries before the real answer was given. "Is it...because you've loved and lost so many times through your immortal life that you can't bare to let yourself fall in love again?!" She asked excitedly, acting way too cheery in the face of such a grim concept.

Celestia just rolled her eyes. "No, of course not. I just told you I've never felt like this about another pony before. Not to mention how could I possibly feel that emotionally damaged when I'm the ruler of a world of friendship obsessed candy horses? I couldn't feel sad if I wanted to," she said with a shrug.

Luna frowned, having been sure she had figured it out. "Well is it because you're immortal and she's not?" she asked, sounding considerably less confident.

Celestia shook her head. "Nope, you know as well as I do that she's going to figure out that dumb Starswirl spell once I give it to her, come to think of it that would solve the whole her not being royalty thing as well."

Luna smacked herself in the forehead with a hoof. "Oh right! I can't believe I forgot about that. Well I guess I give up then, why can;t you ask her out?" She probably could have come up with more guesses but now curiosity was getting the better of her.

Celestia responded by slumping down onto the ground and covering her face with her hooves, looking like a filly that was just told their birthday party was being cancelled. Out from under her hooves came a quiet whimper that sounded sort of like words but Luna couldn;t understand any of it.

Luna groaned, this was becoming a pattern. "Judging by the way this whole day has been going, I'm sure this is going to be a very dumb answer, just spit it out already!" She roughly prodded Celestia in the ribs as she said it, earning her a very gratifying squeak.

Celestia considered poking Luna back, but decided it wasn't worth the effort and instead let her hooves fall from covering up her muzzle. "I can't ask Twilight out because if I do, she's gonna say no" she said in a defeated tone.