Soarin's Pet Rock

by Beware The Carpenter


1 - It's a Trap!

Stoner was a rock.

Stoner was Soarin’s pet rock, and wouldn’t want to be anyone else’s rock in the world if it meant leaving his bro. He’d been with Soarin, through thick and thin, since they were kids. He’d stood guard for the boogycolt when Soarin slept as a foal, comforted Soarin when he dropped out of school, motivated him to keep exercising when they were at pegasus fat camp together, encouraged him when he was stuck in a deadbeat job selling corndogs at Wonderbolt shows, and celebrated with him when Soarin finally succeeded on his third attempt of joining the legendary team.

They were best friends; and even now that Soarin was rich and famous; he never forgot to feed Stoner, or water his mossy mane to keep him looking good. Whenever he could, Stoner would help Soarin keep organized by keeping track of the post-it notes which Soarin stuck to his hoof, but most of the time he just relaxed on Soarin’s dresser and watched his best buddy enjoy life. Usually, Soarin would be doing something interesting enough to keep Stoner entertained, and tonight was no exception:

It was Thursday night. Saturday was the Canterlot Cup finals, where the Wonderbolts would go head to head with the team from Oatlantis to defend their titles as the best stunt-flier pegasi in the world. Team captain Rainbow Dash was giving everyone tomorrow off to make sure they’d be fresh for the big show; meaning most of the team was going to be out late tonight, but Stoner still wasn’t surprised when he heard his buddy groan excitedly in the hallway, followed by an eager thud of two ponies hitting the wall.

There was a jangling of keys at the door and it fell open as Soarin came crashing in with a hot pegasus babe on top of him, who stopped every few pants to take pictures with the camera she was holding. Stoner would have offered to take the pictures for them, so the mare could use both hooves to tickle Soarin, but he couldn’t. He was a rock.

Soarin was out of his clothes first, with the mare backing off to the dresser, daring him to come get her. Soarin kicked the door shut, and then flew towards her, trying to pull her dress off as she kissed him ravenously before pulling away and whispering; “Now close your eyes and I’ll give you a surprise that will take your breath away.”

Soarin obeyed instantly, his mouth grinning in anticipation; ohh, this was gonna be good! The mare draped one hoof around Soarin’s neck, and with the other, she reached for Stoner; no wait, what was she doing? NO!

Stoner tried to run away, but the mare grabbed him behind the neck and then smashed him into Soarin’s forehead. Soarin’s eyelids opened just long enough for Stoner to see his eyes roll back in his head and then the mare dropped both of them to the ground. She looked around briefly and then turned around and started pulling out the dresser drawers, rummaging through the contents, and just as she did Stoner accidentally managed to look up her dress and saw a cutie mark of a lockpick and a broken window. Stoner tried blowing on Soarin’s face to get him to come to, but dude was out cold. “Soarin! Wake up, buddy! She’s stealing all our stuff!”

The mare galloped over to Soarin’s closet, and opened it, then gave a small laugh and began pulling out Soarin’s Wonderbolt uniforms. He only had ten, and the mare greedily stuffed nine into her saddlebags, before turning hungrily towards the one Soarin had left on the floor.

“Get away from that! Soarin needs at least one uniform or he can’t be in the show!” The mare didn’t listen; skipping over to Soarin’s last suit, she stuffed it greedily into her already budging saddlebags. How was Soarin supposed to compete? “Soarin! Wake up, bro!” It was too late. The mare made one final sweep over the room and then made for the window.

She stopped just long enough to blow Soarin one final kiss, and then, she was gone.