A Rough Day
I looked at the tree... it was a tilted tree, so much so that I was worrying about my continued safety.
As that tree, was tilted towards my house.
If I had known that tilted tree and what tremendous trouble it would cause to the townsponies of Ponyville, then I would have let that tree tilt, near tipping of balance, because honestly, a tipping, tilted tree taking a trip into my house would have been a better outcome than the troublesome troubles that would lie ahead.
And it was all because of me.
"... And so the meadow of grass did wither, as the mare on his resting place did cry, and once she paid her dues to her lover, she had moved on... to greener pastures."
...
"That... was deep."
"Eeyup." The large pony added, and pulled on the large wagon carrying a bountiful amount of apples, each looking more succulent that the last...
Hold it in Scry, you're here for a reason, do not get distracted.
"So, ah... Big Mac was it? There is actually a problem I need your help with."
He nodded as we went down the dirt path, the apple farm was coming into sight so I didn't want to linger much long-
Oh, we stopped.
"I heard that you and ma' sister don't get along well, so ah thought I'd talk to you here."
... This stallion is more insightful than I had originally thought, "It doesn't bother you that I've come to blows with your sibling?"
"Nnope." He shook his head, but didn't elaborate further. I suppose he preferred to give simple answers... which begs the question, what started that amazing philosophy discussion? I can't exactly remember how we led into that...
"Okay, well you see, it was just a little earlier when Pinkie... visited me... unannounced... again..."
Mix one quart of Jenix, then a half hoof sprinkle of Mox Moss, then another three turn stir and... perfection.
I took a bottle and held it my the string attached to it's neck, dunking it into the new mixture and pulling out a full bottle. I smiled as the enhanced concoction swirled in an attractive display of ribbons and light. I could see lumps of blue and green smashing into each other, thus giving the illusion of mini fireworks exploding inside the small glass bottle.
"I was cooking... what exactly? Sunflower Stew"
Another successful brew! And a very potent one as well.
Let's see... I forgot to look at what exactly is does didn't I? I was sure it's not the typical tinkering that I usually do... I had a good reason for it.
I looked at my open book again, I must have lost the page, this doesn't look like anything I put into the brew. The damn wind must have messed up the pages.
I flickered through the pages a few times till I came to what I was looking for.
A natural Essence Enhancer Elixir, 'pour down the throat or onto item you wish to use with, and have it's strongest quality increased ten-fold!'
It was good for three hundred and six doses, considering the ingredients were in an abundance I didn't have to water it down to help the process, thus making it a very strong mix.
One drop should be able to help with a great deal of weak ingredients I acquire on the road...
Sure enough, one drop used, and the test subject, a Sunflower, managed to suddenly bloom incredibly well, it's colors were the brightest yellow, a quick bite confirmed it, it was like sunbeams took the time to grave my tongue with what they taste like.
They were also kind of spicy, nothing I couldn't handle.
I nodded at my success and turned around...
And there she was, staring at the mixture... Pinkie Pie!
"I was sure I locked the door, I usually do that when I'm... cooking, and I felt my privacy was violated, and of course, Pinkie being Pinkie, she asked...
"Hey Scry-Scry! What's this thing?"
I was anxious, I was actually anxious beyond belief that a pony managed to find herself in my workplace, but, I kept a level face. Panic just makes things worse, panic makes you think irrationally.
"It's... alcohol, I use it to disinfect cuts and bruises." It was one of my weaker lies, but I was flustered at the moment.
"Why's it look like punch then? It looks like really tasty punch!"
I should have seen what was coming, she already had it to her lips and started slurping it down-
"She... got out of control, I have no idea what exactly happened, all I remember is that things went... crazy...
"... Tautarus..." I muttered as I tightened the rope even harder, Pinkie was currently... twitching. A lot. She was twitching so much that the visible jerks in the rope I was holding made it all the more worse.
I managed to measure it out, she took exactly twenty-two drops, about an eighth of a dose, but it was more than enough for her to suddenly go off her rocker. It was like a spell was designed to explode in the most non-lethal yet chaotic way possible!
I looked over at my home, which currently looked like a kindergarten's battlefield, streamers, balloons, wrapping paper and sweets everywhere I looked, it was like Pinkie was trying to make the hovel look like a redone Sugarcube Corner.
"Hey... Scrylicious?" I shivered as yet another nickname spouted from the pink abominations mouth, "Come on, can't we play some MORE I mean, we haven't played games like PINTHETAILONTHEPONY WAIT, nevermind, there are other ways like, OH WAIT didIever tell you about the story of my Cutie Mark?! There was RAINBOW anditwaslike BOOM! and I was like WHOA! and then thats when I noticed people staring out the screen... and splitting, so many PINKIES EVERYWHERE! There were MEANIE PINKIES but there was also cutie pinkies and I was like WHA?!"
"And then... I noticed all the other ponies who weren't ponies and there were so many watching! ITWASTHESCAIESTMOSTAWESOMEEXPERIENCEEVER! And then... and then... and then..."
"P-Pinkie, calm down... it's best if you just calm... down." I tried an obvious futile attempts at stopping this madness, but I was only answered my a grin... and she stared blankly somewhere.
"Hey... readers... I know that PJ has been gone for a while, but he means well, he'll try to write chapters as quickly as possible but also, I have to ask something, on a personal level..."
WHYhaven't you asked Scry-Scry more questions!? Don't you know the author truly appreciates other ponies input into the story, and you just blow him off like that!? YOUR ALL MEANIES, ALL OF YOU ARE MEANIES! And so help me if I don't see some comments I am going to SMASH that fourth wall and kick your flanks so hard that NIGHTMARE MOON would have less of an altitude problem than you, I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME YOU-
"And after she stopped shaking so much that the tree nearly came uprooted... she fainted, and woke up with amnesia the next morning..."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"... Yeah... so can you help me get rid of the tree that is dangerously tilted towards my house?"
"Eeyup."