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// Tatzltea Troubles in Ponyville 
// Story: And Thus, I Became the Tatzlprincess 
// by Miss Marionette 
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	“Twilight!! Twilight! Come oooon! You don’t wanna be late for my super special awesome spectacular town wide extravagant omega alpha happy fun joy sponsored by Fluttershy Tea Party do you!?!” I heard Pinkie Pie’s voice, bouncing around the halls of my library as I got ready. “Pinkie, I doubt we’re going to run out of tea! Did you see the size of the pot that Discord gave Fluttershy? I am just freshening up is all. If I don’t do it here, Rarity will do it there. Patience is a virtue!” I reminded her, combing a few knots out of my mane.

The sun was slowly setting outside, and I could hear the hustle and bustle of the whole town outside. Pinkie Pie was holding the biggest tea party that Ponyville had even seen, with everypony attending. Vinyl ‘DJ Pon-3’ Scratch would be providing music, with a few performances from Octavia and Lyra to add some ‘class’ to our tea consumption. Fluttershy and Discord would be providing the tea, and as much as I didn’t trust Discord, I had full faith that Fluttershy could keep him in line. 

Finally, I checked off the last detail on my list of proper mane, tail, hide, wing, and horn care. Spike was off, running errands for Rarity. I was almost thankful, knowing that he would only be swallowing down the tea to look good for Rarity. That dragon...how he expected interspecies relations between a dragon and a pony to ever work out, I would never know. What would the children look like? Though, I suppose it makes him happy, so it’s not in my rights to rob him of that. 

I finally walked down into the main room of the lobby, only to see Pinkie twitching in all manner of ways. “Uh, Pinkie sense going off? What’s THAT one mean?” I asked, sitting back on my haunches to observe the party pony of our town twitching and contorting in all many manner of ways that I swear only she could pull off and NOT need intense medical attention. That’s just Pinkie for you, I suppose.

Eventually, the Pink, poofy mane mare of Ponyville stopped, and shrugged. “I have no idea! Whatever it is, it’s something totally new, and TOTALLY weird! I look forward to it!” Pinkie smiled that big, bright, Pinkie Pie patented smile. I just gave a small sigh, before smiling and gesturing to the door. “Come on Pinkie, let’s get out there. I am sure that you wanna be the one to deal out the tea.” I don’t think I have ever seen her bolt out of the library so fast. I followed after her, chuckling a little bit.

The town was completely done up for the grand drinking of tea. It had been Fluttershy’s idea, actually. She wanted a small tea party with just us six girls, but then Pinkie began to invite others...Till, eventually, though extended invitations and a lot of begging from Pinkie Pie to Fluttershy, it became a whole town event. To sweeten the pot, as it were, we were trying out a whole new type of tea, as it were. Discord assured us, while he was helping Fluttershy make the tea, that Princess Celestia had had a cup in the morning and simply loved it. While it was Discord saying it, Princess Celestia knew her tea. Not even HE would risk incurring tea related wrath from it’s biggest sponsor in Equestria.

I looked out at the sun setting farther, and watched as the stringed lights all began to light up, dangling all over, connecting the buildings. I took a brief sniff, and sighed in delight. The tea smelled amazing, and I picked up the pace, joining a number of other ponies all hurrying to the main event. I don’t think that there has ever been such a vast gathering before, all in the name of drinking and enjoying tea. I smiled, seeing more and more ponies. I dare say that there wasn’t a single pony staying in for this one, even foals allowed to stay up for a cup. Maybe Pinkie Pie had started a new Ponyville tradition, and I would be the princess presiding over it all? I had to admit, that was a little exciting for me. My first Holiday!!

The large tea party was set up in the center of town, all based around the biggest teapot I had ever seen. It was floating over a roaring fire, and was as big as a house! We had a rather elaborate contraption all setup and ready. All one needed to do was pull a lever, and the grand teapot would tip ever so slightly to pour down a massive funnel towards the awaiting cup. Depending on the lever that was pulled, it would either be hot or iced once it got to the desired cup. After that, we had a vast ‘tea prep’ table set up, in which to allow those to make their tea their own. Sugar, honey, cream, the works. I saw Pinkie fast at work, darting about, delivering tea to every table as fast as she could. 

Rainbow Dash landed next to me as I trotted over to our special table, set aside for me, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, and Spike if he ever showed up. “Hey Rainbow Dash. Excited?” I asked the pegasus, nudging her with my wing. Oh, that tea smelled utterly heavenly. Rainbow Dash shrugged, looking around at all the different ponies. “Eh, tea isn’t usually up my alley...but I know me being here and drinking tea will make this all twenty percent cooler, at least.” Rainbow Dash smiled, and I patted her on the back with my wing. “That’s the spirit girl!” I encouraged, and Rainbow Dash just smirked a bit, before something caught her attention and she dashed off again.

I finally reached the table to find Rarity and Applejack giving one another quite the stare down, teacups next to them on the table, filled. Rarity’s was steaming, piping hot, while I could see the ice in Applejack’s. Fluttershy was only looking between the two, so I sat down next to her, and Pinkie Pie had a cup set for me before running off again. “So, Fluttershy, what’s up with them?” I asked, gesturing to the pair. 

“Oh, um, well...Rarity thinks tea should always be as hot as it can be without burning your mouth, while Applejack, well, says that tea should be as cold as...um…”
“As cold as a windigo's behind on a winter solstice blizzard!” Applejack filled in for Fluttershy, before Rarity scoffed loudly.
“How uncouth! Tea is meant to be hot and steaming! Applejack, darling, I think I would know a thing or two about tea! It is the drink of high society!”
“Pfft! Are ya’ll suggesting we don’t have tea on the farm? Why, Ah been enjoying iced tea with Big Mac, Applebloom, and Granny Smith fer years!”
“Applejack, darling, I’m not saying that that method of tea drinking is okay on the farm, but in a high class social event such as this, you must show SOME class!”
“Well excuuuuuuse me for not wanting tah burn mah mouth on some tea! Twilight! Tell Rarity that tea shouldn’t be hot enough to burn yer tongue off!”
“Twilight! You’ve been with Celestia most your life, PLEASE tell Applejack tea has a certain temperature that one must adhere to!”

I looked between the pair, blinking a few times. I swear, they could literally fight over the color of the sky if it wasn’t proven to be blue. “Well, girls, Princess Celestia is the last word on tea, and she has enjoyed it at all temperatures. Some mythical teas even grow hotter or colder as you drink it. So, I feel that you can drink tea at any temperature and it’ll be okay. I mean, why don’t the two of you try out each other’s tea?” I asked, before switching their cups. They looked almost dumbfounded, before grumbling about how they supposed they could give it a shot. I smiled, happy to resolve yet another conflict between such GOOD friends...No, Twilight, never again.

Finally, a loud horn was blown and a hush fell over the crowd. We all turned out heads to see Pinkie sitting behind the horn, a wide smile on her face. She soon Pinkie’d over to sit at the table, followed by Rainbow Dash. Mayor Mare walked up behind the microphone, smiling to us all before tapping it a few times to ensure it was working. “Hello, everypony! I would like to cordially welcome you all to this, Ponyville’s first, ever...’ she paused, staring at the name of the event for a few moments. “Super Special Awesome Spectacular Town Wide Extravagant Omega Alpha Happy Fun Joy sponsored by Fluttershy Tea Party!!” Pinkie Pie shouted out, and mare we called Mayor nodded a few times. “Yes. That. Let us all take a moment to thank Fluttershy for catering the event….and let the tea drinking commence!” 

With that done, everypony in Ponyville, including myself, lifted up their own cup and gave it a drink. It was thee most amazing tea I had ever tasted. No wonder Princess Celestia had liked it so much! Music began to fill the air as Vinyl Scratch began to get to work on the turntables, Octavia seated next to her, the pair of them sipping their own cups. Pinkie drained down her cup, followed by another, and a third, all in under five minutes. Applejack would drink hers, once Rarity’s, before letting out a resounding ‘Yeehaw!’, proclaiming that that was a buck of a kick! Rarity sipped hers more gingerly, before agreeing that the sensation wasn’t too unpleasant. 

I enjoyed my own cup, and as the music played the tea party began to go in full swing. While the tea kept flowing into our cups, everypony going back for seconds and thirds, the Cake’s, Bon Bon, and Big Mac all had stalls set up to cater to the event, providing the food with which we could wash down with tea. I turned and smiled at Fluttershy, raising my eyebrow. “Hey, Fluttershy, where’s Discord?” I asked, canting my head at the mare.

“Oh, um, he said he had a few more pots he wanted to deliver. Canterlot, Manehatten, Fillydelphia, Appaloosa, places like that.” Fluttershy smiled, and I let out a small ‘Ah’ before beginning to sip my tea. I couldn’t place it, but I began to feel a dull ache in my tail, mouth, and around my eyes. I shook it off, before sipping down another cup of tea. 

Suddenly, though, things go weird. The first one to be ‘affected’ as it were, was Pinkie Pie, who’d been chugging the tea like a mad woman. She gave a sudden shriek, which turned into a bit of a squeel. We all turned, and my jaw literally dropped from my mouth. Pinkie Pie had, well, changed. Her tail was long and lizard like, a poofy line of hair traveling down it, before ending in a tuft. Her eyes had odd, almost lightning strike like designs, bright, neon pink, zigzagging from her face. As if to go full on weird, her lower jaw had opened up two ways, and a trio of three, dark pink tendrils had slithered out. 

We all stared, before another screech could be heard. At first, I thought that it was somepony fainting at the sight of Pinkie Pie, as us ponies aren’t the most accepting bunch. When another screech sounded, I thought it was just hysteria catching, and then I turned and saw Applejack. Applejack’s eyes were huge, as she was suddenly up and stamping her hooves. I watched as red, lightning strike marks suddenly grew in under her eyes, marking her. After that, her tail seemed to drop off all of it’s hair, before swelling out, long and lizard like, with that red hair, ending in a tuft. Finally, her lower jaw split, and a trio of tendrils almost fell out, before feeling about. “Thith ith NOT yeehaw!!” Applejack declared, speaking around those three tendrils.

I looked around, my eyes full of shock. Pony, after pony, after pony was struck with the affliction. Those not turned watching in terror as their compatriots turned, before they were next. No one was spared, not even foals or the elderly. Suddenly, it dawned on me, when I felt the ache in my body. “Oh….HORSEFEATHERS!” 

I can’t say it was pleasant, but it wasn’t painful either. I barely noticed the effect on my eyes, before all the hair of my tail fell out. I turned and watched with wide eyes. Yep, just like everypony else, I wasn't spared from gaining a lizard like tail. A sudden, sharp pain, and my lower jaw split. I watched, and three long, dark purple tendrils grew out from my mouth. As I stared, something finally clicked. I’d scene this kind of thing before. When I went with Discord on a very certain mission with Cadence...And we fought that giant Tatzlwurm. “Dithcord!” I spat, before glaring at my tendrils.

The town was on the brink of tearing itself apart. Everypony had changed into these, these...Tatzlponies! Pinkie Pie was suddenly next to me, leaning in. “Thith ith tho my fetith…” She whispered, and I just glared at her. Now was NOT the time for her dirty fantasies! Finally, I pulled the tendrils into my mouth, and decided now was the time to step up. I flew into the air, and summoned one of the more...useful Alicorn abilities. The Royal Canterlot Voice. 

“EVERYPONY! Remain calm and do NOT panic! I, Princess Twilight Sparkle, will get to the bottom of this! Princess Celestia will know what to do! There is probably some spell which will totally fix all of our issues!” I declared, and it seemed to appease the crowd. If only because they didn’t want royal, alicorn, canterlot vocal wrath brought down upon their heads. I floated down, glancing to Rarity, who was staring at her own dark purple tendrils. “Rarity, do you know when Spike’ll be back? I MUST get a letter to Princess Celestia.” I asked, and she looked at me, before managing to swallow down her own tendrils. “He...ahem, he SHOULD be back right about...Now, actually.” Rarity said, and just like that, Spike rounded a corner, holding a collection of boxes. He gazed at the sight before him for a few moments, before dropping all the boxes. “This is so NOT my fetish!!” Spike spoke, turning tail to run. On instinct, my tendrils shot out of my mouth, wrapping around the dragon and dragging him back, kicking and shooting fire at my tendrils, but they thankfully were unphased.

I dragged him up to us, the whole group looking down at him. He seemed about to scream, before instead burping a letter right into my face. It bonked against my nose, before my magic caught it. I lifted Spike into the air, before opening the letter and reading it over. Celestia...wanted me in Canterlot, NOW?! I read over the letter a few times, before quickly summoning some paper and a quill. I wrote a quick reply, and squeezed Spike to get him to shoot fire and send it. “Um, Twilight, you can probably let Spike down now…” Rainbow Dash said, and I gave a small eep, before dropping the little baby dragon. “Thorry Spike…” I said, pulling the tentacles back into my mouth. 

He only burped out another letter, looked at Rarity, and fainted. “Oh, it isn’t THAT bad!” Rarity huffed, scowling at the dragon’s unconscious form. I read the letter, and smiled. “Uh, Twilight...How are you going to fix this? I don’t think my animals can handle this very well…” Fluttershy said, hovering there and examining herself. “Yeah, Twilight. I’m not sure if they make Wonderbolt suits accessible to this.” Rainbow Dash said, glancing to her tail.

“...Ah think Ah could use these on the farm.” Applejack mumbled, glancing down to her new appendages. 

“Simple, girls...I am going to see the princess! She will surely know what to do! You have stay here, keep things as calm as you can. Maybe keep the party going?” I ask, and as if on cue, the music started again. Pinkie Pie was up there with Vinyl, doing her little jig while Vinyl just seemed to shrug, and drop thee beats. Octavia had seemingly fainted next to the other mare, so there was no one else really to tell the alabaster mare to freak out that she was using tentacles to work her turn tables. 

“Oh yeah, you girls got this.” I smiled and nodded to them, before raising into the sky and setting off for Canterlot as fast as I could. At least, I hoped they had this. As I flew, a though occurred to me. Something Fluttershy had said...Discord was taking teapots to every corner of Equestria. I hurried along even faster. All I could think of as I flew was one simple thought.

“Dammit Discord!”