Lyra carefully snuck closer and closer towards her prey, she could practically smell victory at hoof... Tensing her powerful pony muscles she quickly pounced with a loud battle-cry, "HAAANNNDDSSS~!!!"
Chuckling quietly, I jerked my hands away from the windowsill they had been resting on, allowing the mint green unicorn to land herself a face full of pie. I brought my hands up to my mouth, attempting to stifle the laughter that was shaking the rest of my currently invisible body.
Lyra quickly stood back up, turning to face her prey with a glare. "Why won't you just stand still!?" She yelled at me.
The hilarity of the situation was too much for me, and I broke down. Clutching my sides I laughed hysterically, slowly fading into view as I stopped consciously maintaining my invisibility.
Lyra's jaw dropped as she watched me fade into view, before a large grin grew upon her muzzle. "I knew it!" She cried out joyfully, bouncing around my laughing form. "I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Humans are real!"
Hearing that last sentence helped me get a hold on myself, reeling my laughter back in. I glanced down at myself and sure enough, I was visible. "Darn it..." I muttered. I quickly began to fade from view again.
Noticing what I was doing, Lyra quickly launched herself at my disappearing body. "Where so you think you're going?" She demanded, attaching herself to my torso "You are coming with me to prove to Bon-Bon that I'm NOT crazy!"
I simply gave her a wide grin and went intangible, allowing her to drop to the floor. The unicorn quickly shook the metaphorical cobwebs from her head before turning towards the sky, "I WILL FIND YYOOOUUU~!!!" She screamed.
"Lyra, what are you doing now?" Her friend Bon-Bon asked, exasperated.
"I found a human, but he escaped!" Lyra explained excitedly, "You've gotta help me find him!"
Bon-Bon simply shook her head, "Oh Lyra, everypony knows humans are a myth. Just accept it and move on... Preferably towards the candy shop." - The earth pony narrowed her eyes - "Where you're supposed to be working the register."
"Fine..." Lyra said before walking towards the candy shop, lest she incur the wrath of her best friend. Though the green pony took a glance back at where she saw the human, narrowing her eyes. "This isn't over..." She thought with determination.
I looked around for something to do now that my little game of 'cat and mouse', or 'Lyra and Hands' in this case, was interrupted. Just then I noticed a prismatic blur flying over the fields of Ponyville. A mischievous smile spread itself onto my face as I realized that the next target for my pranks would be the one and only Rainbow Dash...
Arriving at the field where I last saw the blur, I noticed tank sitting on a hill watching his owner. He wasn't even wearing his helicopter stuff, which was odd. Though now I also know that the timeline is also past the 'May the Best Pet win' episode, so that's good.
I quickly snuck up next to Tank and examined the tortoise to check for anything that might make him more unique. As far as I could tell, the flight goggles he wore were the only things truly differentiating him from any other tortoise.
I couldn't help but grin as an idea popped into my head. I've noticed that I have been grinning a lot lately... I'll chalk it up to the Cheshire in me. I quickly spun on my heel, discreetly turning into an almost exact copy of Tank before becoming visible again.
Rainbow landed not even a minute later, her eyes closed as she began to boast. "So whaddya think Tank, it's pretty awesome right? I'm sure to get into the Wonderbolts soon!" Then she opened her eyes to look at her pet...
Rainbow ended up doing a double take, seeing two Tanks. "What? Tank do you have like, a twin brother or something?" She asked, though I wasn't sure which of us she was directing the question towards.
I decided to mess with her a bit more, and began to walk forward. But instead of Tank's crawl, I moved more along the speed of Opal which caused Rainbow's eyes to bulge. Taking it a step further, I began utilizing another of my Cheshire abilities to begin walking onto the air.
"Okay am I dreaming, or is there a tortoise walking in the air?" Rainbow asked, seeming very shocked and confused.
"Not a dream, I can tell you that much!" I chirped once I managed to reach a point where I was about face level.
The Prismatic Pegasus's eyes narrowed, "What are you?"
"Why, I'm not surprised you don't know..." I answered, whirling into the shape of my pegasus form. "Discord and the Changelings are likely some of the only other beings in Equestria who can change shape after all..." I mused.
"So if you're not Discord... And you aren't a Changeling... What exactly ARE you?" Rainbow demanded, poking her hoof into my chest.
I waved a hoof to indicate myself, making my eyes widen in false disbelief, "Me? Why, I'm just your average pegasus pony..." I replied to the rainbow-maned mare, who just responded with a deadpan stare.
I shrugged, "Okay, so I'm not a pegasus... Well, I am right now... But... Oh, you know what I mean!" I exclaimed, exasperated by my own inability to explain myself. "I'm a..." Here I paused in thought. After all, I didn't really need to tell the truth to her. Heck, I didn't even have a reason to say anything...
"I'm the Pony of Shadows!" I lied, making some ghostly noises while rearing up on my back legs and moving my forelegs around.
Rainbow raised a brow before hovering above the ground and crossing her arms, "Oh yeah?" She asked, "Prove it."
I allowed myself to land on all four hooves again, smirking. "Alright," I replied confidently, "Try to touch me." I challenged, activating my intangibility.
The flying pony looked at me skeptically before landing. She then walked over to stand next to me before attempting to slug me in the shoulder.
I couldn't help but laugh as she lost her balance due to a lack of the resistance that had been expected and fell flat on her face. "You're hilarious Rainbow Dash!" I told the pegasus, still chuckling as she stood up and brushed herself off.
The mare glared at me, but didn't attack. Smart choice since she would've just went through me again... Raising a hoof, I waved at her. "Well, it's been fun but I've got places to go and ponies to prank!" I said, evaporating into a mist that floated back towards Ponyville. I've got an idea that I'm just dying to try out next...
I had changed back into my original human form a few minutes ago, but continued to walk through the skies above Ponyville. Looking around, I noticed something glinting near the Everfree Forest. Bored as I was, I didn't think twice before making my way towards the area.
I made it to the Everfree a few minutes later with my enhanced speed. Stepping back onto the ground, I looked around for the object that had caught my attention and spotted it near a tree.
Walking over, I picked up the object for examination. It appeared to be some sort of crystal... But why would there be a- I had to abandon the crystal, and my musings, to dodge the objects I heard whizzing through the air. The Cheshire Cat's abilities are proving to be invaluable so far...
Looking around the area, I noticed a black silhouette walking towards me. Whatever it was, it was definitely bipedal. It almost looked like a human but that couldn't be true, right...?
"Well done, well done!" The figure called jovially, clapping his hands as he walked into the light. It was a human, a human male with wild black hair and a pair of steam-punk goggles hanging around his neck. He was also wearing a Victorian era suit, so he must really like steampunk...
"What the hell! Are you trying to kill me!?" I yelled at the guy, shaking my fist. You can't tell me you wouldn't be mad too, the guy just tried to impale me... With... Crystals... Oh no, don't tell me. "You... Doctor Labcoat guy gave you some kind of powers too? Why try to kill me with them!?"
The man laughed, "Oh of course I have powers, Tier 5 to be exact." He replied easily. "As to why I'd kill you" - He shrugged - "I felt like it. You may call me Baron Umbra, not that it'll matter for long. Though before I kill you, would you give me the pleasure of telling me your name and Tier?"
"Umbra? So you do something with the shadows or something? And my Tier? What the heck does that mean!?" I shouted at the guy, completely confused by his babbling.
Umbra sighed, "I suppose I can do the mercy of explaining it to you before you die..." He replied, "There are 6 tiers. Tier 1 allows you three random powers. Tier 2 allows you 3 random powers and the choice to remove one for a potentially better, but still random, power. Tier 3 would allow you five powers. Tier 4 also allows for five but also allows you to choose up to three that you don't like and wish to re-roll, so to speak. Tier 5 allows for five, followed by the chance for up to three 're-rolls', followed by one last chance for a single 're-roll'." He explained before allowing a slightly crazed smile to cross his face.
"And the final Tier... Tier Ex, also known as the Experimental Tier, allows for much the same as Tier 1 with a few major differences... In any of the previous Tiers, you are not allowed an 'Omni' power nor does it allow any power that is the ultimate version of it's kind... But with the Ex Tier you are allowed any power, anything at all, except for three: Omnipotence, Omnicide, and Omniscience." Umbra finished his explanation with a look of longing.
"I do wish I could've gotten something like that, but oh well... I got my five powers, though for some reason one does seems to be in its ultimate form! Darkness Manipulation!" He laughed maniacally for a few minutes before calming himself. "I suppose it was a simple oversight on their part, though perhaps not. Either way, that ability along with my Blood Constructs, Crystal Manipulation, as well as my Lunar and Solar Embodiments pretty much ensures my victory. Now that I have explained the Tier System, tell me the information that I have requested."
I looked at the guy like he was a complete idiot, which he kind of was. I mean I could understand him telling me about the Tier system I guess. But then he seriously went on and just told me all of his powers? What an idiot, kinda like one of those stereotypical one-off or 'doomed-to-fail' villains from some morning cartoon... I guess I'll humor the guy a bit though.
"My name is John, and if I had to pick a title for myself..." I thought about that for a second. "Well, I suppose I'll have to think about that for a few day-"
"Think about it?" Umbra laughed, "I doubt you'll live long enough to care. Now hurry up and tell me the Tier you received so I can kill you!"
I have that 'Absolute' Thievery, so I must be... Oh this is too good... I smiled at him, allowing my grin to quite literally split my face. "Experimental Tier." I replied simply, reveling in his reaction.
The supposed Baron stumbled a bit in shock before regaining his composure. "You're bluffing!" He shouted, "I don't believe you, and you can just die with your lies!" Having said that, Umbra brought his arms up and began to launch crystals at me from his palms.
I simply became intangible as my tail began to flick from side to side. Wait... When did my tail get there? Oh well, I guess it doesn't really matter.
I began to slowly stalk towards Umbra with a predatory grin, watching as he continued shooting crystals through me. Eventually, once I was about 20 feet away and closing in, he seemed to realize that his crystals weren't doing anything and switched tactics.
Lowering his arms, Umbra attempted to blend into the shadows. Once he was far enough into the shadows, they appeared to come to life. I could still see him though since he was obscured by darkness, but didn't merge with it. I wonder why... Maybe he couldn't? Maybe he was new to his powers as well?
My feline-enhanced eyes pierced through the darkness of the shadows easily. It's too bad he's so weak, I was expecting much more than this...
The shadow-whips attacked, crashing through me ineffectually. I know it's a bit cheap when you can turn intangible, but in a life-or-death battle... I wasn't going to play fair, especially not with my food.
That gave me pause. When did I start thinking of Umbra as food? Was this the Cheshire part of me or the Greed embodiment of the Absolute Thievery talking...?
"Ack!" I grunted as a shadow dug into my shoulder before retreating, my lapse in concentration causing me to become tangible again. It doesn't matter; I can worry about my abilities affecting my thoughts after this is over. I quickly forced myself to become intangible again as the whips renewed their attack.
"You see! It's only a matter of time before I kill you!" Umbra gloated, having caused a rather large gash to my left arm. "Your arm is heavily injured, and soon you will die!"
I'm starting to get annoyed by this guy... Feeling like it would be best to finish this quickly, rather than play with my food some more- ...Yeah; I've really got to sort out my thoughts after this. Anyways, I quickly rushed the guy and turned my hands tangible enough to grab his shoulders.
"No! Hey, get off of me!" Umbra shouted in panic, struggling in my grip. I don't know why he didn't use his powers, and I didn't care. In fact, I hardly even noticed.
The second I grabbed the guy, I lost focus on the world around me. Then I heard something, a voice. The feeling I got from it was the weirdest thing too... It felt very sinister and malevolent, but only to the world around us. To me it felt like the presence was welcoming me home kindly, giving off an aura of benevolence that it seemed to reserve for me and only me. Whatever it was... It whispered to me, speaking brokenly. Mostly conveying intents and ideas, with only a few words, "Eat... steal... take... mine... yours... ours... keep..."
Absently following a sense of direction from the voice, I felt myself raise my still clenched hands away from Umbra, an odd vapor following my movements. The second that it all appeared to have left the still struggling Baron, he collapsed. He was still alive though, I could hear him breathing.
I watched as the oddly solid smoky substance condensed into a ball, fascinated by it. I turned it this way and that, examining it like a child would a new toy. "Eat... yours... ours... use... keep..."
Following my instincts, I raised the ball up to my mouth and popped it inside. I chewed for a few moments, sampling the odd texture and flavor. It tasted like copper, which was odd... The texture was weird too: dry and slimy with something crunchy, something similar to salt, here and there. Half of the substance was cold, and the other was hot. I quickly swallowed, scared that I might burn my tongue.
"Ours." The voice said once more, a rush of images flying in front of my eyes. They were a bit fragmented and broken, with some other information filling my brain. It seemed to be mostly about the powers that 'Umbra' had used...
I walked absently through Ponyville, processing what had just happened. A lot of ponies were off to the side, staring, pointing, and chatting. I didn't really think about why they were until Lyra jumped in front of me. Glancing down, I noticed I was still in my natural form...
"I've got you now!" Lyra shouted, "You and your hands will be mine!" The green unicorn yelled, launching herself at me.
I jumped, easily clearing the unicorn, and landed on the air above her.
Lyra landed and turned around, looking around confused until she spotted me lounging around on the air. She stomped a hoof, "Get back down here!" The mare demanded, glaring at you.
Raising an eyebrow at the angry pony, I stayed still just long enough to give her my thoughts on that particular request - "How about... No." - before running quickly towards Twilight's library. As I ran, I allowed myself to get closer and closer to the ground until I hit it and kept running.
Risking a glance behind me, I saw that Lyra was hot on my heels. I turned back, spotting the library in front of me and making a beeline for the door. Lyra followed, of course.
As I neared the door, Lyra must have thought she had me. I based this assumption off the fact that she yelled, "I HAVE YOU NOW!" At me. But the unicorn didn't know one important fact. Knowledge of this important fact would've saved her a lot of pain and trouble, as well as the health of her nose.
I quickly used my intangibility to dive through the door, stopping for a moment as a somewhat satisfying *THUD!* came from the other side. I faded out of sight, just in case she decided to try and open the door to continue her pursuit.
Twilight trotted towards the door, probably assuming somepony had simply knocked on it rather than ran into it at full speed. She opened the door with a polite, "Yes?" to find Lyra sitting on her plot- heh... plot- and rubbing her nose with a hoof.
"Where is he?" She asked furiously. Uh-oh...
"Where is who?" Twilight replied, raising a brow in confusion.
"The Human! I saw him run in here!" The mint-green mare responded.
Twilight began to sweat a bit, nervously tapping her hooves together. "Human? What human?" She said, glancing every which way other than at Lyra. I silently face palmed at Twilight's horrible lying abilities. "There's no human here!"
"Oh yeah? Why are you so nervous then?" Lyra asked, squinting suspiciously at the Element of Magic.
Deciding to help Twilight out a bit, especially seeing as I caused this in the first place, I walked up the stairs. Once out of Lyra's line of sight, I removed my invisibility. After a quick spin, I was a pony once again though with a few obvious differences from my usual pony form. Well... One major difference. I was a unicorn this time, I figured it would be a good idea to try to pass myself off as having been here studying with Twilight. Seems believable.
Trotting back down the stairs, I walked up to the two unicorn mares. "Hey Twilight, what's going on? I thought we were going to study a bit more theory next?" I said, hoping that she would understand what I was trying to do
Twilight glanced at me in confusion, apparently the fact that I was a unicorn made me look that much different...
"Oh, I see why you're so nervous now..." Lyra commented with a smirk, nudging Twilight in the ribs. "Way to go Twilight, I guess I'd better leave you two alone." She quickly trotted off.
"What! Wait, Lyra it's not like that!" Twilight yelled after the human-obsessed unicorn, seeming very embarrassed if the blush on her cheeks was anything to go by. Lyra was already out of earshot though...
"Well that went pretty well, I think." I commented, watching Lyra's retreating form.
"Ugh!" Twilight huffed, stomping a hoof and slamming the door shut with her magic. "Who are you exactly?" she asked, turning to me with a frown.
"Aww... You don't recognize me? I didn't think I would look quite that different as a unicorn than I did as a pegasus..." I replied, sounding disappointed. I even laid my ears back and looked at the floor before scuffing it slightly with a hoof, mentally patting myself on the back for the performance.
"John?" Twilight asked, a bit hesitantly.
I grinned and, in a quick movement that caught her off guard, pulled her into a big hug. "You do remember me!" I said, acting over-dramatically relieved. "I was so worried!" Twilight blushed as she pushed against my embrace before finally giving up and simply teleporting her way out.
She was still blushing slightly from the unexpected contact, though now she had a frown on her face. Unfortunately for her, the blush made it much less intimidating than she might have wanted.
I couldn't help but tease her about that though and commented, "You look adorable when you blush, Twilight." Her face lit up like a Christmas tree and the spell she had begun to charge dissipated, guess that must have thrown her for a loop...
*Knock Knock* "H-hello..? Um... Twilight? Are you there? If you're not, that's okay. I just..." That must be Fluttershy, based on what I'm hearing.
Twilight quickly ran over and opened the door for her friend, desperate to distract herself from having to deal with me. "Hi Fluttershy, can I help you with something?" She asked.
"O-oh, um... Yes, if it's not to much trouble that is..." The pegasus pony glanced behind Twilight and shrunk into herself upon seeing me, an unfamiliar pony, in the background.
You know... The Cheshire cat was able to take his head off, I wonder if I can too? Worth a try at least.
I sat down before taking two hooves to my head and attempting to lift. My head came off pretty easily actually, so I turned it around in my hooves to look at the rest of me. Ah! Idea....
I rolled my head over towards the two ponies at the door, my body sprawling across the ground while my head came to a stop in front of Twilight's legs. "Eep!" Fluttershy cried before fainting at the sight of a 'beheaded' pony.
Twilight looked at my head in shock, which was quickly followed by an annoyed deadpan once I began to laugh. She did a face-hoof as I collected my head, putting it back onto my body.
"Really John? Really....?" She asked me with a raised eyebrow.
I shrugged, "Sorry Twilight, just experimenting with my powers a bit..." Having said my excuse, I turned towards a shadow in the corner and began to concentrate on it. "Come on, come on..." Success! A small tendril of shadow was now waving at me.
Well, I think that's enough for one day! I headed up to the guest bed, falling asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.