"Beat it! Beat ittt!" A thug shrieked as he and his comrades fled out through the front of the partially demolished nightclub. "Midnight's gone! Buck! Get the buck out!"
"Hey!" WHURRR-CLANK! Stu Leaves pivoted his mech around, grabbed a table, and flung it after the stallions. "You forgot your change!" SMASH! As the debris and splinters settled, he pivoted and smiled down at Rainbow. "Heh... do you get it? Because it's like I'm giving him change for a money payment that never happened, when in fact I'm only promising to deal more pain and—"
"Rule Number One of Awesomeness!" Rainbow sneered. "Don't ruin the moment!"
Mulia lifted her head from where she hid it in the downy chest of Gustave. "Are... are th-they gone?"
"Looks like it," Donut Joe said, squinting at the delapidated entrance. He turned to smirk up at Stu. "Way to go, feather-cap! You really gave them the run for the money!"
"Is this real life?" Gustave murmured.
Mulia patted the griffon. "Just roll with hit, Le Grande."
"Good timing, Stu!" Rainbow's voice cracked. "I'm sure I would have found a way to turn things around eventually, but your arrival totally made things a heck of a lot easier! Now we just gotta—"
"Erm... hold up one second," Stu said. WhurrrrCLUMP! CLUMP! CLUMP! He marched the heavy machine past her.
She blinked, craning her neck to see him approach the stage. "The hay are you doing...?"
"What else?!" Stu undid the last bound creature and then ripped the lids off the cages capturing the rest. "Freeing these innocent citizens! They were about to be eviscerated, after all!"
"Stu, wake up!" Rainbow grunted. "None of them are real!"
"Still, they deserve better!" The stallion said from within his mech. "After all, a few of them helped me find this place! And you wouldn't believe who they looked like!"
"Lemme guess..." Rainbow leaned against a table, folding her front limbs. "They looked just like the Apple Family."
Stu gasped, swiveling around in his steamy metal walker to gawk at her. "How'd you know?!" Just then, a stampede of mules, diamond dogs, and buffalo ripped past him. "Whoah! Not so fast!" He reeled in his suit, almost tipping over like a giant metal tortoise. "Eheheheh..." He performed a creaking salute, joints steaming. "You're mighty welcome, citizens!"
"Unnngh... Stu..." Rainbow facehoofed, sighing. "They're not real..."
"Sorry..." Stu fidgeted like a shy toddler inside his mech. "I-I guess I can't help it. This whole city is so nasty and mean. Did you know that I woke up to a bunch of colts banging all over my suit with baseball bats?"
"No kiddin'?" Donut Joe exclaimed.
"Hey, Joe!" Stu waved a metal hoof—inexplicaby tearing a part of the stage to shreds. CRACK! He winced, then conitnued: "Nice to see you guys in one piece! Especially you, Rainbow!" He smirked. "So you're the 'Blue Jay,' huh?"
"I guess," Rainbow said, wincing as she stretched and unstretched her artificial wings. "For some reason, the dream thinks I wanna be this rogue anti-Shindig bandit or something..."
"Heh... lucky you," Stu said. "I've no clue who the 'Red Rook' is. Apparently he's a former protector of Shindig turned into a 'traitorous' protector of the abused populace of Philanthropy. Heh... who'd a thunk it, am I right?"
"And then you met members of the Apple Family...?"
"Well, they weren't the actual Apple Family," Stu said. "I mean, this is just a dream world, and they certainly weren't named the same." Stu shrugged, venting steam from his suit. "Wish I could explain it! It's almost as if some of AJ is here with us."
"Yeah," Rainbow said, nodding. "I've noticed that myself."
"Wait..." Mulia blinked. "You mean to say that this friend of yours is... somehow trying to help you through the dream?"
"It's a long story," Donut Joe muttered.
"Well, we're all ears!" Mulia exclaimed. "Isn't that right, Gustave?"
"This place smells like rat feces."
"Ermm..."
Rainbow squinted at Stu. "You okay there, buddy?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah..." Stu nevertheless huffed and puffed. "But darn if I wish I could get a breath of fresh air." He shuddered in his suit. "I've been stuck in this big ol' thing since I woke up in Philanthropy. It's nice being able to rescue ponies and be a hero, but what I wouldn't give to sweat a bit less, you know?"
FLASH! Epcot materialized in front of him, smirking. "Well, all you had to do was ask, silly!" She pulled at a red lever. "Zoop!"
PHWISSSSSH! The front of the suit spread open like a metal flower, and Stu's body slipped out in a pool of his own sweat.
Whump!
Rainbow winced. "Ah jeez. You okay?"
"Phweeeeeeeee..." Stu swiped his naked brow and smiled in relief. "Never betterrrrr." He shuddered, lips curved. "Though I could use a drink." With a calm breath, he looked down at his body... then shrieked like a filly: "MY WINGS!"